In the Crypt with a Candlestick
Page 22
CHAPTER 52
There’s not much that doesn’t seem better after a good night’s sleep. Unfortunately, on this night of nights, nobody enjoyed that luxury, except for India. India slept like a baby. Not only had she survived a seventy-foot fall onto a hard marble floor, she emerged from the incident the following morning as beautiful as ever, her wits and bones perfectly intact, and even – what was truly miraculous – revealing a glimmer of a sense of humour.
First to visit at the hospital (after Egbert of course, who was sent off in search of decent coffee) came Mr Carfizzi, quivering with soon-to-be-shed Italian teardrops, and filling the cubicle with the sweet smells of aftershave.
‘I am so sorry,’ he whimpered. ‘I am ashamed.’
India listened to his meandering confession with a stern face. ‘That was actually seriously wicked of you, Mr Carfizzi,’ she said when he had finished. ‘Fabricating evidence… Stealing keys and putting them in cream pots… You would have left my children without a mother! And what do you suppose would’ve become of Tode Hall? National Trust, Mr Carfizzi. Think about it!’
But she could never stay cross with people for long. Especially when they apologised. She said, ‘You must have loved Dominic very much.’
The Italian teardrops flowed. Yes, he had. He had loved him very, very much.
‘I’m sorry I poisoned you,’ she said.
‘And me, I’m sorry I tried to frame you for murder.’
They hugged it out.
India still had one more question:
‘… There was a letter. From Lady Tode. I tossed it over the railing just before Dominic sent me over…’
‘Hm?’
‘Did you happen to see it? It was a legal thing…’
He shrugged. ‘I don’t know about any letter.’
* * *
Next to join them was Alice, with Geraldine in tow. India wanted to know if the story of her fall had reached the newspapers yet.
‘There is a little interest…’ Alice said, having battled her way through a hundred-strong pack of journalists, first at the top of the Hall drive, and then again at the doors to the hospital. ‘A couple of your guests put pictures up on Instagram so – the image of you and Dominic on the hall floor is… well, it’s pretty much everywhere…’
India shuddered. ‘Can you see my pants?’
Alice smiled. ‘You were wearing trousers.’
‘Lucky,’ said India, relaxing back on the pillows. Alice patted her leg.
‘Are you all right?’ Alice asked.
‘Me? Oh, I’m fine…’
‘Can you remember what happened?’
‘Not really, no,’ she said. ‘Well… Actually there was a letter – do you remember? I threw it over the edge… You don’t happen to know what happened to it?’
Alice frowned. ‘I think it got stuck in the tree, didn’t it? But there was so much going on…’
* * *
Next in: Sir Ecgbert. He’d somehow wheedled his way past the press and through the hospital’s security. He arrived hotly pursued by Egbert, who was trying and failing to keep him away.
With great panache Sir Ecgbert pulled back the curtains surrounding India’s bed and smiled warmly down onto the gathering.
It was quite a squash in there: Alice, Geraldine, Carfizzi, India – and now Egbert and Ecgbert, all jostling for space. Somebody in the next door bed grumbled about the disturbance, but everyone ignored him.
‘Worry no more, India, my friend,’ Sir Ecgbert cried. ‘And by the way, it’s good to see you’re alive. I have the letter! Plus – thanks to my computer wizardry, not to mention my excellent, outstanding intuition, my nose for a crime, et cetera – I’ve got all the emails and all the messages Mummy and Dominic sent each other before she died. They had a massive row because she didn’t want him with her in Capri.’
‘Why, yes. Now you mention it, it was ferocious,’ Geraldine nodded. ‘I’d quite forgotten.’ She waved this small detail aside. ‘But darling, they were always rowing.’
Ecgbert rolled his eyes. ‘You might have said something. We could have cleared this up long ago.’
‘Who might have mentioned it?’ Egbert asked. ‘Mentioned what?’
‘Granny. Never mind. The point is: Mummy was so completely fed up with him, she decided to change her will. Mellors and his wife were meant to be witnesses. They were about to sign the damn thing that day – the day Mummy was meant to go to Capri. But then – well actually it was me who put a spanner in the works by turning up and absolutely insisting she come with me to the mausoleum. So she never got round to it. Never got the chance.’ He paused. ‘By the way Granny and Alice already know most of this. Sorry to repeat. Dominic killed Mummy to stop her getting it signed off—’
‘Getting what signed off?’ Egbert interrupted.
‘This. Obviously.’ He waved the sheet of paper retrieved from the branches of the Christmas tree. ‘The addendum, disinheriting him. The addendum which your wife so idiotically took up to the gallery and presented to him…’
‘I didn’t take it up to the gallery to present it to him,’ India protested. ‘He lured me up there… he was crying his eyes out. He seemed really upset. Little did I realise…’
‘The point is, he needn’t have troubled himself. The addendum was never was signed off. Which meant, as long as nobody accused him of her murder, he would get the two hundred and fifty thousand pounds promised in the original will.’
‘… So?’ said India.
Sir Ecgbert shrugged. ‘Maybe he thought you were onto him?” he said. ‘Or maybe he just wanted to feel safe. Get that letter off you and destroy any possible evidence…’
‘What an absolute heel,’ said Egbert. ‘Very brainy of you, Coz. I must say. I wouldn’t have worked that out in a billion years…’
‘Super brainy,’ agreed India.
‘Exceptional,’ said Geraldine.
‘… By the way…’ Egbert leaned in, dropped his voice: ‘I don’t think this needs to go any further, does it? I mean… really. Every family has its problems. We all have our “little secrets”, as it were. There’s absolutely no necessity to go bothering our excellent law enforcement friends… especially, you know, vis-à-vis this morning’s court proceedings. Mr Carfizzi, sir, are you on board with that?’
‘Of course,’ he said. ‘You can rely on me.’
A pause.
Everyone turned to look at Alice.
From: India Tode
To: Nicola Tode, Esmé Tode
Cc: Sir Ecgbert Tode, Egbert Tode, Alice Liddell
Subject: Hello!!!
Dear Cousin-in-Laws!
Eggie wanted to reach out but I thought it would be nicer (-: if I did, as probably the last time you saw me was on the front page of your newspaper, splattered all over the Great Hall, with the tragical Dominic R beneath me, who as I presume you know, did not survive. Rest assured however it wasn’t QUITE as bad as it looked, and I am absolutely fine!!! However I appreciate it was most likely pretty horrid for you to see your childhood home in that context. So I am really sorry about that!
I write with fab tidings! As you also probably know, or may also have read in the newspapers or whatever, we had your Mama’s inquest in Todeister last week )-: The police were absolutely super and I must say have been super throughout. They are very helpful individuals for which Eggie and I will be ever grateful!! The verdict from the coroner came through that nothing malicious occurred, despite all the vile rumours, and it was all just an accident (-: Yay!
So now we can ‘move on’ as it were, and really pull together to make Tode Hall a historic house which is more than just historical! I have lots of plans, which myself and Alice Liddell (who you will remember from your childhood days!) intend to set in motion asap! So watch this space!!
However, on a more serious note, you guys need to start thinking about a funeral, as now the verdict has come in, they can’t keep your lovely Mama’s remains in the morgue much longer! Brillian
t, brilliant Ecgbert is super-concerned about the type of coffin etc, and is very keen to go ahead and order one – I am enclosing a link to his fave, in case you think his choice is a bit OTT (sorry Ecgbert!!). So basically I think you guys should come home and help your bro with this. As you know there is LOTS of room at Tode Hall (-: so please feel welcome to stay at any time, and let’s give your Ma a decent send off, as we know she was one amazing, unique lady who, despite being quite difficult in some ways, probably deserves a fabulous send off, just like anyone!!!
Big hugs to you all and REALLY look forward to welcoming you super-gorgeous people home to your super-gorgeous home!
X0X0X0X India
ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS
Thank you Harry Mount for the Latin. Thank you Paola Frankopan for the German. Thank you Nick Howard and Vicky Barnsley for being such amazingly good sports. Thank you to Clara Diaz, Hannah Wann, Gemma Shelley, Bekki Guyatt and especially Anna Boatman – I feel very lucky to be working with you.
Thank you to my mother, Teresa, and my husband, Peter, and my children, Panda, Zebedee and Bashie. Extra thanks to Panda, as always, for her sharp comments and generous encouragement… And most of all… thank you, Clare Alexander.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Author photo © Zeb de Sales
DAISY WAUGH, granddaughter of author Evelyn Waugh, is the author of numerous novels published in Britain. In the Crypt with a Candlestick is her first book to be published in America. She lives close to the River Thames in southwest London. To find out more, visit her website at: daisywaugh.com.
Also by Daisy Waugh
The Desperate Diary of a Country Housewife
Last Dance with Valentino
Melting the Snow on Hester Street
Honeyville
WRITTEN UNDER E. V. HARTE
The Prime of Ms Dolly Greene
The Case of the Fool
IN THE CRYPT WITH A CANDLESTICK
Pegasus Crime is an imprint of
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Copyright © 2021 by Daisy Waugh
First Pegasus Books cloth edition October 2021
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ISBN: 978-1-64313-805-3
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