Ready to Bear

by Ivy Sinclair

  Billy was up again, but this time when he dropped, Joshua managed to move just in time to avoid the impact. Then he sprang up on all fours. Billy twisted his feet around in a wide circle, and the heel of his foot connected squarely with the side of Joshua’s head. The crowd gasped as the heavy snap of bone breaking sounded in the speakers that were attached to sides of the bars, magnifying the sounds from inside the cage.

  A small spurt of blood flew out of Joshua’s mouth and landed on the white canvas. The crowd began to cheer again. Even though Thea was glad that Billy had inflicted the first injury, she felt sick to her stomach at the same time. She clapped, but she didn’t quite feel the same energy as earlier. Still, she had to show Billy that she supported him, no matter how she felt about what he was doing.

  Joshua’s body flew backward as Billy kicked his foot out again, and this time it landed underneath his chin. Billy got up and start to advance on Joshua even he laid there. A moment later, the lights all around them began to flash red. Joshua looked up at the lights that signaled there was less than a minute left in the round. He stumbled up to his feet and ducked as Billy swung his fist at his broken jaw. Then he landed a solid punch into Billy’s side.

  Billy’s hiss of pain echoed through the speakers. He backed up just in time before Joshua’s next punch was able to connect. The two fighters locked arms around each other’s shoulders as each one tried to push or pull the other off balance.

  Then the gong of the bell sounded, marking the end of the round. The two flew apart. The referee unlocked a door on the other side of the ring and stepped inside motioning for both Billy and Joshua to go back to their corners. He stood in the middle with his hands on his hips as if he had the responsibility to do something other than manage the time clock.

  He tapped at the earpiece in his ear and looked up at the announcer’s booth. He nodded briskly and then pointed at Billy. It was the indication that Billy had won the first round. Thea clapped more enthusiastically this time. She saw there was a bruise on Billy’s side as he moved around to have an intense conversation with Kyle through the bars. She wished she could hear what they were saying.

  “Kyle’s probably telling him to quit being a pussy and bring out the bear,” Eric said in her ear.

  “As soon as he shifts, whatever time he’s got left is going to disappear,” Thea said. “He has to keep his human form as long as possible.”

  “I don’t think that’s going to be for him to decide,” Eric said. “Sorry, Thea. The people came here to see a werewolf and a werebear fight. That’s what they paid for, and you can bet that’s going to be what Joshua gives them.”

  Thea knew that her hope that they’d stay in their human form was unrealistic. That didn’t stop her from wanting it anyway. Billy seemed to be arguing with Kyle. She wanted to talk to him too, but she felt the grip on her elbow tighten even as the idea crossed her mind.

  “You’ll only distract him,” Eric said. “Keep your head in the game, and he will too.”

  Thea didn’t want to believe him, but she knew he was right. Billy was fighting for his life. He didn’t need to worry about her. She tried with all her might to send him a positive thought, though, to let him know that she believed in him. That she wanted a future with him. That she needed him to come back to her in one piece.

  As if he had somehow heard her thoughts, his face turned toward her. It felt as his eyes pierced a part of her soul. She smiled at him and blew him a kiss. He smiled back, but she could see the wince of pain on his face and the tightness of the lines around his eyes. Her bear was in pain. Whatever drug the doctor had given him was wearing off. Thea felt as if someone gripped fingers around her heart just like the ones around her elbow.

  “Fight,” she whispered, although she knew he couldn’t hear her. “Let the bear out.” She mouthed the words that would either be Billy’s victory or his demise. It had all come down to this, which was exactly what Joshua had wanted all along.

  The lights around the ring began to spin red again. The break was almost over. She heard a high-pitched whine then that tore into a howl that took her breath away. Her eyes whipped to the other corner of the ring. She gasped as she watched the shift happen. Where Joshua had just stood, there was now a large wolf. Its pelt was the blackest of fur, and he lifted his head to howl again.

  Billy stood, but he didn’t turn around. He looked up into the crowd. Thea followed the path of his gaze and saw that he was looking up at one of the suites. She could see Alex standing with his nose pressed against the glass. Even as the referee left the ring. Billy bent over as he twisted around.

  The lights flashed green and in the brief moment before all hell broke loose again, Thea saw the sight that she had been waiting to see all along. Where the man who had stolen her heart had just stood, a huge grizzly bear rose up on his hind paws and roared into the air.

  The sound sent chills down Thea’s spine.

  “Let’s hope that dumb bear gets the job done in time,” Eric said.

  Please, Billy. Don’t die. That was the only thought in Thea’s mind as the two animals in the ring began to circle each other.

  CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE

  Billy wasn’t going to go in for the attack immediately. He had used the first round to get a sense of how Joshua moved. The guy was slower than he expected but had the right sense when it came to when to attack and when to retreat.

  The wolf began a slow circle and raised his snout in a short guffaw as if to challenge Billy to charge. He wasn’t going to do that quite yet. It was a delicate balance. The more energy he expended, the quicker he’d burn through the drug that had already been losing a big chunk of its effectiveness. But he also couldn’t wait too long. If Joshua wouldn’t engage him and let the time run, it was an equally effective strategy because Billy might have only minutes left before the poison claimed him.

  Billy allowed the wolf to draw him around in a loop. The crowd outside had already started growing impatient, though. They wanted to see interaction. They wanted to see the clawing and the biting. They wanted to see the blood flow.

  He wasn’t sure how he had ever enjoyed the sport at all. He had been so worried that the part of him that thrived on the fighting would surface inside of him, but the hole that seemed to have been a part of him most of his life had been filled. He knew how. The woman who stood outside the ring cheering for him, even though he knew her heart wasn’t in it. She never wanted to see him like this, but she was there. For him.

  How he had gotten so lucky to find her, he’d never know. But he couldn’t let their story end like this. Not as a dead bear in a ring. That wasn’t what she deserved, and for the first time in his life, he believed it wasn’t what he deserved either. He had born the weight of the guilt about Pete long enough. His family might never forgive him, but he had forgiven himself. That was what mattered.

  Billy wasn’t going to let the wolf get the better of him. Billy snarled at him, and the wolf snarled back. He had to get his paws around the wolf’s neck. One clean twist, and he’d take him down. Joshua would never know what hit him. But he had to get close enough to do that without letting the wolf bite him. That was going to be infinitely more difficult.

  Even as he considered his options, Billy could feel the temperature in his body rising. The poison’s effects were multiplying by the second. He didn’t have a lot of time at full-strength, and once the poison took hold, he’d be toast.

  He stepped closer to the wolf and took a swing, trying to engage him. The wolf danced away from him. The crowd started to boo. They wanted a fight. Billy moved into the center of the ring and followed the path of the wolf as he moved back around the ring again. Then Billy moved.

  Joshua expected Billy to jump at him, so he shifted off to his left. But he realized too late that Billy hadn’t made a move toward him at all. In fact, Billy had moved in the opposite direction and clenched the edges of the cage. Then he swung his wide girth upwards far more gracefully than anyone would have ever given a bea
r credit to do.

  Flying backward over the wolf’s head, Billy landed on his hind legs behind him. Joshua didn’t have a chance to turn before Billy’s claws sunk deep into muscles of his back. Joshua let out a howl of pain and swung his head around to chomp at the claws in his back. Billy managed to get his paws back just in time, although he felt the skim of Joshua’s teeth graze the tips of his claws.

  Billy whipped his paw up under Joshua’s stomach and flipped the wolf onto his back. He barely heard the crowd as the blood rushed to his ears and drowned out the sound of their voices. Joshua’s soft belly was exposed. Billy roared up onto his hind legs and was just about to come down with all his might when Joshua’s back paw swiped heavily across his leg. Billy went down just as the lights flashed red, and the sound of the bell went off. It hadn’t offered a warning this time.

  It was the end of round two, and he still hadn’t managed to get his kill shot in. When the referee came into the ring this time, a janitor followed him to do a quick wipe down of the blood that splattered across the floor.

  Billy managed to limp over to his corner. Kyle waited for him, and his expression was grim as he bent down to survey the damage to Billy’s leg.

  “That cut clean down to the bone,” Kyle said. “Are you going to be able to make it?”

  Billy guffawed, but he was starting to see two Kyles in his vision. The last round needed to start soon. He heard the roar of the crowd grow louder, and he looked over to see that the referee had pointed in Joshua’s direction. The second round went to Joshua. That meant he had five minutes to make this all go away. But Billy had no idea if he’d make it through that five minutes alive.

  He couldn’t stop. He glanced around to where Thea sat. He could see that she was tugging on Eric’s arm, and they were arguing. She kept pointing in his direction. He hoped that Eric would keep her put in her seat. He didn’t want her to be any closer to the action than she already was.

  “Hey, big boy. Your mind in the game or what?” Kyle snapped his fingers at Billy’s snout. Billy snarled at him. “That’s better. Get the girl afterward. Get the cure first.”

  The lights began to flash again. This was it. Everything had come down to this. Billy turned and faced Joshua for the last time. He was ready. He had to be ready.

  As soon as the light flashed green Billy charged, putting his entire might into the momentum of his charge. Joshua met him head on. Billy dug his claws into the muscles of Joshua’s shoulders, but then Joshua’s snout sprung around to clamp down, and Billy barely managed to get his paws around the wolf’s snout to pin it closed.

  His limbs began to shake, and since both of his arms were in the dead center of his body holding Joshua’s body, he couldn’t protect the rest of his torso. He felt Joshua’s claws rip into his belly, and he howled, but he didn’t let go.

  Joshua’s hind legs went up into the air as Billy lifted him higher off the ground. Between the explosion of pain in his head and the quiver he felt in his legs, he thought that he might collapse at any moment. But he couldn’t stop. He couldn’t let go.

  As Joshua’s legs pawed at the air, more claws sliced into Billy’s legs and thighs. He was going to go down. Still, he didn’t let go of Joshua’s snout. He knew that with the fur of his paws covering all of Joshua’s airways, there was no way the wolf would be able to breathe. If he could just hold on.

  He felt it as his knees gave way, and he fell onto them heavily but forced his front legs higher into the air. It was almost as if he was offering Joshua’s body up to some kind of shifter god. He unleashed a roar that spoke of his pain and the unfairness that he felt. If he was going to die, then he was going to take the bastard who killed him with him.

  Joshua continued to struggle in between his forearms, and even as Billy felt the onset of lightheadedness that foretold his blackout, he brought his massive bulk down onto Joshua’s smaller form. Joshua was pinned beneath him, and Billy’s action forced whatever breath he had been able to hold up and out of his lungs.

  Billy gave him just enough time to think that he was going to be able to take another breath. He sank his paws into Joshua’s neck followed by his jaws. Then he twisted his head to the side. The crack of bones was second only to the sound of blood rushing to his ears when he realized that Joshua had landed his own bite into Billy’s shoulder before Billy broke his neck.

  Joshua’s body twitched and went limp. Billy fell off of him and landed heavily on his back. He didn’t hear the crowd anymore. He didn’t hear anything anymore. He barely made out Kyle’s face above him. Kyle was saying something, but Billy couldn’t hear him. There was only one face that he wanted to see before he went. He tried to hold on long enough.

  Then she was there. Thea’s face floated into his line of vision. She had tears streaking down her cheeks. Eric was behind her trying to pull her away, but she fought him like a she-devil. Billy wanted to tell her that he would be all right, even though he knew now that he wouldn’t.

  He tried to mouth to her that he loved her. The words were there on his tongue, but then he remembered he was in his bear form. He let it go, but even as he tried to get the words out, the blackness took him over.

  Billy was gone.

  CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO

  Thea sat next to the hospital bed and looked at the monitors across from her with blurry eyes.

  “You need to sleep, hon.” Thea looked behind her and saw Sophie standing in the doorway with two Styrofoam coffee cups in her hands. “You look like death warmed over.”

  “I want to be here if he wakes up,” Thea said. It was the same thing she had said every day to every person who came into the room for the last three days. Eric. Tony. Kyle. Even Alex, who had insisted on staying with her for the first day until she and Eric forced him to go home. “He’s going to wake up soon.”

  She felt Sophie’s hand on her shoulder and then gratefully took the coffee cup into her hands. The warmth of the cup felt good against her cold palms. There was little in her life that felt good ever since she watched Billy bleed out on the mat in the ring.

  Dr. Clarkson had seemed to appear out of nowhere right after Billy went down. She had watched in horror as he stuck a large needle into Joshua’s arm and then shot the blood directly into Billy’s open mouth. He took another sample and drove it directly into Billy’s breastbone. He had ordered that another pint be taken from Joshua’s body during transport to his clinic for immediate transfusion into Billy’s torn up body.

  While she watched the conclusion of the fight, every slice of Joshua’s claws had felt as if it had ripped at her flesh as well. She had felt every ounce of Billy’s pain. She had known the moment when he slipped beyond her grasp. Now she had nothing left to cling to but the hope that his body would heal enough to the point where his mind could come back to her.

  Somehow, Dr. Clarkson had managed to keep Billy’s body alive. But she wasn’t sure where his spirit had gone.

  “I’ll stay here with him if you just want to go home and take a shower,” Sophie said. “I’ll call you if anything happens.”

  “No,” Thea said, shaking her head. “I want to be here.”

  “You’re not doing him any good if he wakes up and then finds you are exhausted and on the edge of malnutrition. Come on, sweetie. You have to take care of yourself. That’s what he would want you to do.”

  Thea was exhausted. She knew that she must look terrible. She had barely eaten a thing in the last three days. Dr. Clarkson told her it was hard to tell how long it would take Billy’s body to heal. The poison had taken a heavy toll before the cure was administered, and it still might have been too late. The only thing they could do was wait.

  Doing nothing would have caused her to go out of her mind. So she did the only thing she could think of to keep her mind occupied. She held his hand and talked to him. She had told him everything about her that she could think of in the last three days. She thought that maybe when he came back, he would remember all of it. He was there, somewhere, listenin
g to her. She had to believe that.

  “Please, sweetie. At least go splash some water on your face. It’ll make you feel better,” Sophie urged.

  Thea reluctantly let her friend pull her up out of her chair and allowed Sophie to push her toward the bathroom door. Her legs felt as if they had been made out of rubber. She felt emotionally and physically barren. She needed to do something else to help him, but she didn’t know what else to do.

  As she reached the door, she turned back toward the bed. An idea sparked in her mind. There was one thing she hadn’t done. In all of the things she’d told Billy over the last three days, there had been one thing she’d held back. She had been afraid. Once she said it, even if he didn’t hear it, she knew she wouldn’t be able to take it back. And if Billy didn’t wake up, she would have to live with the knowledge that there was that thing that had been left unresolved between them. She wasn’t quite sure how she was going to deal with that.

  “Sophie, can you go get me something to eat? I don’t care what it is. Anything is fine,” she said.

  “Of course, sweetie. There’s a little Chinese take-out across the way. I can grab something there,” Sophie said.

  Thea nodded her agreement. Anything to get Sophie out of the room. She didn’t want an audience for what she was about to do. Sophie grabbed her purse and squeezed her arm as she passed by her. Thea was grateful for her friend’s support, but now she needed to be alone.

  She made her way back to Billy’s bed, but instead of sitting in her chair as she had for the last three days, she perched on the bed beside him. She took his hand in hers. It seemed so big inside her smaller ones. It was one of the first things she remembered about him. She stroked the top of it and brought it up to her cheek. She looked at Billy’s face and put her hand on his chest over his heart. She allowed herself to enjoy the feel of his heartbeat next to her palm. His body was still alive. He had to still be in there somewhere. She just needed to draw him out.