Shattered Secrets

by Krystal Wade

  I started to look up at him but couldn’t meet his eyes, so I opted for staring at the middle of his white, button-up shirt.

  “We’re going to be late for Will’s party.” Derick took my hand and pulled me from my seat.

  Yesterday, I wanted nothing more than to avoid our friends so we didn’t involve them in our problems. Today, the thought of being around people I knew and loved sounded amazing. Socializing meant there would be little time for me to dwell on the fact I lied to Derick.

  Mom always said to be honest. One lie leads to ten, then twenty, then thirty more. Ha. She knew from experience. Did she hurt as much as I did? Did every false truth feel like a knife to her soul? Did she have regret?

  I pressed my ear to Derick’s chest and listened to his heartbeat, so even, so calm.

  Not mine. “You think people will recognize us?”

  He took a deep breath, wrapping me up in a hug, making me feel safe and loved—and worse for being a liar. “If Will didn’t, I doubt anyone else will. We have to try. Knowing how well this Safe Zone works is important for our sanity.”

  Sanity. There was that word again.

  Books don’t talk to people. Books only answer questions if you read their contents. They don’t show you where to find those answers, and they definitely don’t ask you to lie to your friends.

  Was I sane?

  “You with me?” Derick whispered.

  No.

  Would the book know if I told him about the secret again? Would the world suddenly come to an end?

  Probably not.

  But if I wanted to believe in myself—in my state of mind—I had to accept that the book answered my questions, that I was really in Derick’s arms and living in the same house as him, that he was my boyfriend. More than anything, I wanted those last three things to be true.

  So for now, I had to believe I couldn’t tell Derick anything.

  “Abby, if you want to stay home, we can. Are you sure you don’t want to tell me what’s wrong?”

  “I’m fine, just distracted. I’m sorry.” Those two words meant so much more than an apology for zoning out. I met his eyes, the bright blue reflecting the kitchen light, and forced myself not to cry. “Let’s go.”

  Staring at the starry sky, he led me out to the Mustang and then climbed in without saying a word. My attitude fooled no one, not me, not Derick. I probably couldn’t have even fooled a stranger. But for whatever reason, Derick didn’t press me again for information.

  I liked that about him. I liked how he knew not to press me when I lost myself in thoughts, how he knew begging for answers would only hurt us both.

  I had to figure this out on my own first, then I’d tell him. Everything.

  We opened the windows and cruised down Gulf of Mexico Drive, the soothing sound of Band of Horses drifting from the radio. A couple turns later and we were face to face with a keypad.

  Derick punched in the code Will gave us yesterday, then turned up the volume. “And anything to make you smile|It is my better side of you to admire.”

  “Why, Derick, are you singing my favorite song to me?” My chest tightened. I wanted to smile, but my face refused to form one. Every time I tried, needles jabbed at my cheeks, as if I was being punished for pretending.

  Grabbing my hand, he brought my fingers to his lips and kissed them. “For you, to you. Same thing.”

  “Derick, I—”

  “Shh.” He rubbed his thumb over my knuckles and stared at the road, contemplative but not pressuring me. “Whatever’s bothering you, tell me when you’re ready.”

  I love you. You understand me, and I’m keeping something from you.

  “We’re here,” he said, eyes widening.

  I glanced out the windshield, and my chin nearly hit the seat. Will’s massive house stood in front of us: gray brick driveway full of BMWs, Audis and so many expensive cars I didn’t recognize, palm trees swaying in the cool breeze, bright light spilling from the picture windows.

  The amount of money his family had probably rivaled the Hilton’s—or more.

  Leaning forward, I gawked at the well-manicured lawns, the thick blades of grass covered in beads of water from sprinklers, the flowering bushes I couldn’t even pretend I knew the names of, and then I saw Will. “Wow. I’d ask if we were in the right place, but—”

  “Derick and Abby,” he shouted, voice carrying through the open windows. He walked up the street with a girl hooked to his arm. Not any girl, Megan.

  My Megan.

  “You guys made it.”

  “Is it too late to go home?” I asked, halfway out of the car, comparing my denim shorts and white smocked top to her insanely tight and skimpy green dress. She’d always dressed better than me, but seeing the way they lived outside the small-scale lifestyle they kept in Virginia, I didn’t compare. I didn’t fit into this world. And she didn’t know me here. What if she treated me differently? “I don’t think I’m dressed right for this party.”

  Derick laughed and then met me in the grass, but before I had another thing to make me look over-clothed and frumpy, I hid my shoulder bag under the seat—not that anyone here could possibly want to steal from me.

  “Take a deep breath, Abby. You’re more beautiful than that girl will ever be.” Derick slid his arm around my waist and locked the car, exuding the confidence I was used to. “Damn. I just realized that girl is Megan.”

  “You didn’t before?”

  He shook his head, then we took off to greet friends who had no idea who we are.

  “Hey, man,” Derick said, “I finally convinced her to get her nose out of some book.”

  Great. Thanks. Now I’m not only overdressed, but I’m a nerd.

  Half-naked Megan smiled, her lips full and pink and glistening with gloss. “What are you reading?”

  “Umm…” Crap. I didn’t want to lie to another friend, not again. “Some book about beings from another plane, who protect humans.”

  Derick tensed, and she batted her long eyelashes at Will, then stomped his foot in such a Megan-ish way. My heart ached for her to remember me, to see me.

  But could she? What did Megan and Will see with the magic of the Safe Zone protecting me and Derick? Did they see us as taller? Fatter? Tan?

  “Aren’t you going to introduce us?”

  “Geez. Calm down.” Will laughed and ran a hand through his messy hair. “Abby and Derick, meet my friend Megan.”

  “Abby and Derick?” Tears filled Megan’s eyes as she fled Will’s side and linked her arm with mine, tugging me away from Derick, sniffling. “I’ll introduce her to everyone.”

  “You okay?” I asked.

  “Yeah. Fine. Come on.”

  I looked back, begging, pleading—silently, of course—for Derick to rescue me. Was pretending we didn’t know them even fair?

  The guys shared a smile, and Derick shrugged.

  “Don’t worry,” Megan said, “We don’t bite. Did you bring a bathing suit?”

  “Was I supposed to?”

  “Doesn’t matter. I have plenty over here.” She turned and waved. “See you boys inside.”

  She shuffled us right through the entryway, and I gasped. Floor to ceiling windows made up the back wall of the two-story family room, and flames flickered in the gas fireplace. Six or seven other girls and guys sat huddled on the beige leather sofas, playing cards and taking shots.

  “Will said you’re vacationing here from Virginia. How do you know these people?” A pang of jealousy lodged itself in my gut and festered there. Megan had never mentioned any friends in her vacation stories. She mentioned boredom and lack of parents and droned on and on about Will and how he never noticed her no matter what she did to get his attention.

  “Our parents started abandoning us together since the time we were born. At first they left us with babysitters, and then as we got older they just left us alone. Nice, right?”

  Sad. My heart hurt for this part of my best friend’s life I didn’t know existed. I coul
dn’t help how horrible I felt, how clueless. Why wouldn’t she just tell me? It’s not like I’d judge her. Didn’t Megan trust me?

  One girl jumped off the sofa and rushed over to us, smacking her gum.

  Gross.

  She propped a hand on her hip and flipped her long brown hair over her shoulder. “Hey, Megan. Who’s your little friend?”

  Megan dug her nails into the skin on my upper arm, and stabbing sensations skittered up my shoulder. “Abby, this is Jessica.”

  I smiled. “Hi, Jess—”

  “Nice shirt.” Jessica blew a huge bubble.

  Before she could speak another word, Megan steered me toward the left and up an open spiraling staircase. “I lied to you,” she whispered, “She may bite. I hate that girl. I have no idea why Will still allows her to come to his parties.”

  “He’s a guy, she’s a girl?”

  Megan shook her head. “He’s got better taste than that.”

  Like in you? I wanted to say it, but I kept my mouth shut. If Megan ever realized who I was, she’d kill me. For years, I’d urged her to tell Will how she felt, but she always said no. She wasn’t ready for that kind of rejection. Or, she’d say maybe this summer, or this winter. But then, she’d bail at the last minute.

  Megan glided down the hall and then opened a door into the most amazing bedroom I’d ever seen. The walls were round and housed three sliding glass doors leading to a deck that overlooked the inlet between the Gulf of Mexico and Sarasota Bay; moonlight danced off the lapping waves.

  This house put our small Virginia neighborhood to shame, even Megan and Will’s more luxurious neighborhood homes didn’t compare.

  “This is Will’s room,” she said, taking off toward a closet bigger than my condo.

  I tried to picture sleeping alone in a room like this. The décor was white and tan and didn’t really speak to Will’s outgoing personality. I felt as though I was in a hotel room with pretty coordinating things picked out by fancy designers. No sports memorabilia, no posters of any sort, not even a comforter that screamed boy like the one in his real room—not that I’d been in his room for a long time. “Where’s all his stuff?”

  “His mom wouldn’t allow him to harm these walls. This house is for vacations and entertaining important clients. Plus, he’s hardly ever here.” She dug through a white dresser, pulling out bathing suit after bathing suit, and then settled on a navy two-piece. Oddly not as skimpy as the rest of her clothes. “Here. Is this okay?”

  “Better than the alternative.” I winked. “Why do you have all this stuff in his room?”

  “When we’re on vacation, I’m with him practically every day. Well, I’m with him at home, too, but it’s different here—he’s different here.” Megan laughed, grabbed a beach bag from a shelf, then exchanged her shoes for some flip flops. “I end up leaving stuff a lot.”

  Since she had no idea who I was, I had to play dumb. “You like him, don’t you?”

  Her cheeks turned red, and she stared straight through me.

  “Sorry. None of my business. It’s just… you guys are so comfortable together. And you kind of remind me of me and Derick.” I’m sure my cheeks matched hers. Here I was having a conversation with my best friend, who had no idea who I was, about things I already knew.

  “You’re babbling.” She wrapped her arm around my shoulders and led me to the hall. “But I like you. You remind me of my”—Megan choked back a sob—“Never mind. And I love Will. Maybe one day he’ll realize it.”

  That’s because I am that person I remind you of. “Aren’t we changing?”

  A huge, Cheshire grin grew on her gorgeous face. “This was just in case… and so I could get to know you better. There’s a pool house if we decide to get in the water, but the plan is to have a bonfire on the private beach.”

  “Hey, there they are.” Eyes wide, Will untangled Jessica from his lap and made a bee-line for us as we stepped off the last stair.

  I wanted to knock some sense into him, shake him until he realized Megan deserved him. She didn’t deserve to have her heart crushed by him allowing some girl to drape her legs over his lap. I didn’t care how long they’d known each other.

  He grabbed our hands and dragged us to the beach, and Derick followed close behind, looking like he wanted to kill someone.

  “Don’t leave us with that hag again,” Will said, once we arrived by the water.

  Derick brushed by me on his way to a woodpile, his gaze set on Will, and together they tossed a few logs onto the fire.

  “Did you see the way she was sitting on me?” Will asked, clearly unfazed by Derick’s sudden hatred.

  If only we had that telepathy thing.

  “Yeah. Saw that”—Megan looked back at the house, then muttered—“and saw you letting her.”

  “Why’d you invite her?” I asked, staring at Derick as he pulled a few beers out of a cooler and then sat on a beach chair.

  Titling his head, he handed me a drink and pulled me down beside him, his body rigid. I’d hardly ever been one to get involved in other people’s crap so openly, and this new side of me probably surprised Derick as much as it did me. But my sudden desire to help two of my friends couldn’t be what bothered him.

  I put my mouth to his ear and asked, “What’s wrong?”

  “Bad feeling,” Derick said, pressing his fingers to his temple, “right here.”

  Will shrugged, ignoring our side conversation. “I found out the hard way that if Jessica McClaren is not invited to one of my parties, she tells her daddy, and he tells my dad. That’s probably the only thing he’s ever punished me for, upsetting his partner’s daughter, and being grounded sucks.”

  “Hateful,” I said, receiving nods from Will and Megan. They rarely got in trouble at home. Their dads weren’t ever around to punish them—or maybe it was because their dads’ peers weren’t around.

  “Why didn’t your other friends come down here?” Derick took my hand in his and rubbed his thumb over my knuckles, a touch so soft I could curl up and sleep in it, an act so casual it seemed as though we’d held hands for years.

  Will stared.

  So did Megan.

  I got tinglies in my chest, tinglies that meant we did something to prove our love.

  And oh how I loved our hands together, but at the same time I wanted to vomit; people who are in love don’t hide things from each other.

  I chugged the beer.

  “Probably waiting for all their money-leeching groupies to get here,” Will said, smiling at me. “Would you like another?”

  “Sure.” Drinking could relieve me of thoughts.

  Thoughts sucked.

  How could I help my friends when I couldn’t help myself? When I wasn’t brave enough to tell Derick about what the book said?

  He squeezed my fingers and followed my lead, finishing his beer in a matter of seconds. “Grab two?”

  “Ahh. I get it,” Will said, pulling out more Rolling Rocks. “Hiding all the time must be stressful.”

  “Hiding?” Megan sat up as if her gossip alarm went off and alerted her to fresh information to spread all over town.

  My pulse pounded, heating my fingers and toes, blood traveling up my neck and into my cheeks. Derick’s theory better be right, or we’re screwed.

  Will sat beside her and handed us each a bottle. “Tell me you don’t recognize them. The names, the car, their faces?”

  Recognize us? “Do you recognize us?”

  He shrugged. “Yes and no.”

  Derick glanced sideways at me.

  “From what?” Megan squinted, leaning closer, squeezing the bridge of her long nose. “You guys are giving me a headache. Who are they, Will?”

  He laughed. “Don’t you watch the news?”

  “Every night with my mom. I hate the news; you’d think she could find a better way to spend time with me.” Megan frowned. “But why would these two be on TV?”

  “Cannonball!” Some guy called.

  Five big spl
ashes, lots of laughing and high-pitched screaming, dance music blasting from unseen speakers, and we were saved. Sweat covered Derick’s face, his muscles tense and shaking.

  He did this; he controlled these people, the music, the noise. Somehow.

  I wanted to kiss Derick and smack him and be jealous at the same time. I also wanted to ask what changed his mind about letting our friends in on our identities. Maybe he changed his mind because of Will and the fact that he seemed to be figuring us out, and that made Derick worry about the integrity of the Safe Zone. But if Megan couldn’t, why was Will able to? Maybe that’s what Derick had a bad feeling about?

  Will eyed Derick for a moment, then glanced at me and Megan. She bopped her head to the beat as though she lost all train of thought.

  Romancing worked… well.

  Finishing my second beer, I stood. The flow of alcohol in my veins made me sway and the horizon twirl. “Who wants to dance?”

  Anything to break the attention away from the runaway status of me and Derick.

  All three of them shot up, and we made our way to the deck. We danced, and we laughed, and we twirled, and we drank. Blue and red globe lights spun around and blurred in my vision, meshing with the sounds of bass and drums and guitars. People bounced beside me, giggling and singing, their half-naked bodies covered in water, sweat, and beer.

  Derick jumped in the pool, fully clothed, and motioned for me to follow.

  I shook my head.

  “Go on, Abby!” Megan shouted from near the diving board.

  “No way. I’m not wearing that bathing suit!”

  Will broke away from her, ran over and pushed me in. “Live a little, gorgeous.”

  I sank into the chilly water, the blue light filtering through my eyelids, then kicked my way back to the surface, to the sounds of cheers.

  Laughing, Derick swam to me. The depth of his blue eyes seemed endless, enchanting with the lights of the pool reflecting in them. “You look sexy.”

  “Oh yeah, I hear soggy is a great look.” I wrapped my arms around his neck and my legs around his waist, ready to dunk him. “And now—”

  The ground shook, and everything around us exploded into flames. Kids screamed and took off running toward the beach. The house burned, filling the sky with smoke, glass exploding from the heat.