Chocolate Cream Pie Murder

by Joanne Fluke

“I think he’ll show up at the bank,” Norman said, and Hannah noticed that he seemed very sure of that.

  “What makes you say that?” she asked him.

  “You said Ross sounded desperate to get his hands on that money. If you think about it, there’s no reason for him not to show up.”

  “Other than the fact that I told him there were some people in town that wanted to punch him into oblivion,” Mike said. “And I told him that I couldn’t guarantee his safety if he came back to Lake Eden.”

  “True,” Norman conceded. “But people like Ross always think they have an edge. He’s a classic egomaniac. He’s sure he’s smart enough to talk his way out of anything. And he’s convinced that he can make people like him again.”

  Hannah turned to stare at Norman in surprise. He’d described Ross’s personality perfectly. Ross was an egomaniac.

  “How do you know all that?” she asked Norman.

  “From personal experience. My dad was like that. I discussed it with my mother after he died, and she said he was a master at blaming her for everything that went wrong in their lives and insisting that he never did anything wrong. My father was incapable of feeling guilt about anything.”

  Hannah thought about the photos that Norman’s dad had taken of his patients and knew that Norman was right. Dr. Rhodes had probably felt no guilt for taking advantage of his patients.

  Mike gave a little nod. “I’ve arrested criminals like that, even murderers, who believe that their victims deserved to die and by killing them, they were doing the right thing. People like that don’t have any sense of right or wrong. And anyone who encounters them finds them very frightening.”

  Hannah gave a little shiver. She didn’t want to think that Ross was like that, but she couldn’t help having doubts. He must have known that he was already married when he’d proposed to her. And he hadn’t even mentioned it to her. He hadn’t said word one about it during the weeks leading up to their wedding when he’d told her things about his background and family. Were they all lies? Had Ross considered it perfectly all right to marry her when he was already married to someone else? Or was he hoping that he’d never get caught?

  As she usually did when she needed to calm down, Hannah reached for the large loose-leaf recipe book at the work station. “I need to bake, guys,” she said to Mike and Norman. “I’m too nervous to just sit here and drink coffee, so I might as well be productive.”

  The first thing Hannah did was turn to the new recipe section in the back of the book. When someone gave her a recipe or she came up with one of her own that she wanted to try, she encased them in plastic three-hole folders and put them in her recipe book.

  “Which would you rather eat?” Hannah asked them, paging through the recipes she’d collected but hadn’t yet vetted. “I have one for Butterscotch and Chocolate Bar Cookies and another for Coconut Snow Cookies.”

  “I’d like the coconut one,” Norman said.

  And at the same time, Mike said, “I’d like to try the butterscotch and chocolate ones.”

  “Flip a coin,” Hannah told them. “I can only bake one thing at a time.”

  Hannah watched as Norman pulled a coin from his pocket. “Better check that,” she told Mike. “Norman’s a magician, you know. He could have a coin that’s the same on both sides.”

  “Right,” Mike said, holding out his hand for the coin. He examined it, gave a little nod, and said, “You call it, I’ll flip it.”

  “Tails,” Norman said as Mike flipped the coin in the air. It went almost up to the kitchen ceiling and came tumbling back down again to land with a clatter on the stainless steel surface.

  “It’s heads,” Norman announced, looking at the coin and giving Mike a sour look. “Did you cheat?”

  “How could I cheat? I’m not that good at flipping coins. Best two out of three?”

  “Deal,” Norman agreed.

  Mike picked up the coin and flipped it airborne again. “Call it, Norman!”

  “Tails,” Norman said as the coin began its downward descent.

  All three friends watched as the coin landed and then Norman began to grin. “It’s tails,” he announced.

  “I know.” Mike picked it up and flipped it again.

  “Tails,” Norman chose for the third time.

  Hannah found that she was holding her breath as the coin began to fall. She didn’t really care which recipe she made, but she’d never had anyone flip a coin to choose a cookie before!

  “Tails!” Mike said with a disgusted sigh. “Okay, Hannah. It’s the coconut one. And I was all set for chocolate.”

  That gave Hannah an idea. “Then you both win. You can have Coconut Snow Cookies plain, or I can make sandwich cookies out of them with Nutella in the middle.”

  “Sounds great!” Mike looked very pleased. “You’re right, Hannah. Looks like we both won.”

  COCONUT SNOW COOKIES

  DO NOT preheat oven—dough must chill before baking.

  2 cups melted butter (4 sticks, 16 ounces, 1 pound)

  2 cups powdered (confectioners) sugar (don’t sift unless it’s got big lumps and then you shouldn’t use it anyway)

  1 cup flaked coconut (pack it down in the cup when you measure it)

  1 cup white (granulated) sugar

  2 large eggs

  1 teaspoon vanilla extract

  1 teaspoon coconut extract

  1 teaspoon baking soda

  1 teaspoon cream of tartar (critical!)

  1 teaspoon salt

  4 and ¼ cups flour (don’t sift—pack it down in the cup when you measure it)

  ½ cup powdered (confectioners’) sugar (pack it down in the cup when you measure it)

  ½ cup flaked coconut (pack it down in the cup when you measure it)

  Melt the butter in a microwave-safe bowl or in a saucepan over LOW heat on the stovetop. Set it aside off the heat to cool while you complete the next few steps.

  Place the powdered sugar in the bowl of a food processor. (If you don’t have a food processor, you can use a blender.)

  Measure out the flaked coconut and add that on top of the powdered sugar in the food processor or blender.

  Process the powdered sugar and coconut in on/off motion with the steel blade. Continue until the coconut has been ground down into very small pieces.

  Add the cup of white granulated sugar

  Crack open the eggs and place them in the bowl of an electric mixer.

  Add the eggs and mix them together until everything is a uniform color.

  Feel the sides of the container with the melted butter. If it’s not so hot it might cook the eggs, you will be able to work with it now. If it feels too hot to you, sit down, have a cup of coffee, and wait until the butter is cool enough to add to the egg mixture.

  With the mixer running on LOW, slowly pour the melted butter into the bowl of the mixer. Continue to mix until it is well combined.

  Mix in the vanilla extract and the coconut extract.

  Add the baking soda, cream of tartar, and salt. Mix until everything is thoroughly combined.

  Remember the food processor with the powdered sugar and coconut mixture? Take the bowl out of the food processor and with the mixer running on LOW, add the powdered sugar and coconut mixture to the contents of your bowl. Mix until everything is thoroughly combined.

  Hannah’s 1st Note: Don’t bother to wash the bowl of your food processor or blender. You will be using it again for the exact same ingredients.

  Again, with the mixer running on LOW, add the flour in one-cup increments, mixing thoroughly after each addition.

  Cover your Coconut Snow Cookie dough with plastic wrap and put it in the refrigerator. Chill it for at least one hour. (Overnight is fine, too.)

  When you’re ready to bake, take the bowl of dough out of the refrigerator and set it on the kitchen counter to warm a bit.

  Preheat oven to 350 degrees F. with the rack in the middle position.

  Hannah’s 2nd Note: While the oven is preh
eating to the proper temperature, you will prepare your cookie sheets and make another powdered sugar and coconut mixture in that food processor or blender that you didn’t wash.

  Prepare your cookie sheets by spraying them with Pam or another cooking spray or, alternatively, lining them with parchment paper.

  Hannah’s 3rd Note: I prefer to use parchment paper to line my cookie sheets. That way, all I have to do when I take the cookies from the oven is to grab the edge of the parchment paper and pull it, cookies and all, over to a wire rack to cool the cookies.

  Place the powdered sugar in the bowl of your food processor or blender.

  Measure out the flaked coconut and add that to the powdered sugar.

  Process with the steel blade in an on-and-off motion until the coconut has been cut into very small pieces.

  Place the powdered sugar and coconut mixture in a shallow bowl. You will use it to coat the cookie dough balls that you will roll.

  Use your impeccably clean hands to roll the dough in walnut-sized balls.

  Place the balls, one at a time, in the bowl with the powdered sugar and coconut mixture and roll them around until they are coated.

  Place the balls on your prepared cookie sheets, 12 balls to a standard-size cookie sheet.

  Flatten the dough balls with the back of a metal spatula or the palm of your impeccably clean hand. The dough balls will spread out in nice circles that are approximately 3 inches in diameter.

  Bake at 350 degrees F. for 10 to 13 minutes. (The cookies should have a tinge of gold on the top.)

  Cool your Coconut Snow Cookies on the cookie sheets by placing them on cold stovetop burners or wire racks. Cool this way for 2 to 3 minutes and then use a wide metal spatula to transfer the cookies themselves to the wire racks.

  Hannah’s 4th Note: If you used parchment paper, just grab the edge and pull it over to the wire racks.

  Yield: approximately 10 dozen crunchy, buttery, sugary cookies, which will make 4 to 5 dozen Coconut Snow Sandwich Cookies.

  Hannah’s 5th Note: You can eat these cookies just the way they are and they’re delicious. But you can also make them into fabulous sandwich cookies. Instructions follow on the next page.

  COCONUT SNOW SANDWICH COOKIES

  1 jar of Nutella (chocolate hazelnut spread)

  Open the jar of Nutella and spread the bottom of one cookie with the chocolate-hazelnut spread.

  Place the other cookie, bottom down, on top of the Nutella filling.

  Repeat above instructions for all of your cookies.

  Store in a cookie jar or box in the pantry or cupboard. You can also refrigerate, but you’ll take the chance of having your sandwich cookies get soggy.

  Hannah’s 1st Note: The following list suggests other spreads you can use in these Coconut Snow Sandwich Cookies

  Any flavor of jam—use a thin layer or it will squeeze out between the cookie halves. To solve this problem, mix a little powdered (confectioners’) sugar into the jam so that it is thicker and will maintain its shape.

  Any flavor of jelly – use a thick layer or it will squeeze out between the cookie halves. To solve this problem, mix a little powdered (confectioners’) sugar into the jelly so that it is thicker and will maintain its shape.

  Cashew Butter

  Peanut Butter

  Almond Butter

  Commercial frosting, the kind that you’ll find on the baking aisle

  Melted semi-sweet chocolate chips thickened with a little powdered (confectioners’) sugar

  Melted butterscotch chips thickened with a little powdered (confectioners’) sugar

  Melted milk chocolate chips thickened with a little powdered (confectioners’) sugar

  Melted peanut butter chips thickened with a little powdered (confectioners’) sugar

  Melted white chocolate or vanilla chips thickened with a little powdered (confectioners’) sugar

  Hannah’s 2nd Note: Believe it or not, Mike likes cheddar cheese spread between his cookies. Feel free to try it, but no one else I know seems to like Coconut Snow Sandwich Cookies that way!

  Chapter Eighteen

  At a few minutes after eleven, Lonnie had called to report that there had been no action at the bank yet. Ross had not shown up. Mike had contacted Herb, who was keeping his eye on the entrance to town, and that was a negative, too.

  “Do you think he’ll show up?” Hannah asked Mike.

  Mike shrugged. “Maybe. He’s got plenty of time. The bank’s open until three.”

  At eleven-fifteen, the swinging door from the coffee shop swung open and Earl Flensburg came into the kitchen. “You wanted to see me?” he asked Hannah.

  “Yes,” Hannah said, quickly dishing up a plate of Coconut Snow Cookies, even though they were barely cool enough to eat. “Try my new cookies, Earl. And I’ll get you a cup of coffee.”

  “Hi, Norman,” Earl greeted his son-in-law. “Mike? Good to see you.”

  “Good to see you, too,” Mike responded. “Out with the plow again today?”

  “Sure am. I’m plowing around the lake. Jessie Pillager wants to get out there to check his pipes.”

  Norman groaned. “Don’t tell me he was late wrapping his pipes again this year!”

  “He was. And, actually, he is. Jessie’s going out there to do what he should have done last October.”

  “That’s Jessie,” Norman said. “He’s a nice guy, but he’s always a day late and a dollar short.”

  “In this case, it might be a thousand dollars short and four months late!” Earl predicted. “It got pretty cold during the blizzard and the wind that comes across the icy lake is freezing cold. I’ll lay odds that Jessie’s pipes have already burst.”

  “No way I’ll bet on that,” Mike told him.

  Norman shook his head. “Me neither.”

  “These are really good, Hannah,” Earl said when he’d tasted one of her Coconut Snow Cookie Sandwiches.

  “Thank you. I’ll let Carrie decide if she wants to serve them plain, or if she wants to make sandwich cookies out of them.”

  “We like Nutella,” Earl told her. “What else could you use between the cookies?”

  “Peanut, cashew, or almond butter. Or any flavor of jam. Any flavor of frosting would be good, too. The possibilities are almost endless.”

  Earl smiled. “Knowing Carrie, she’ll probably want to use crab apple jelly. She made some last year from the crab apple tree in our backyard. Or maybe rhubarb jam. She makes that, too.”

  “Mom’s rhubarb jam is great!” Norman complimented his mother. “I miss it.”

  “Then you’d better take a trip to our basement,” Earl told him. “Carrie filled a whole shelf with rhubarb jam.”

  When Earl got up to leave, his box of Coconut Snow Cookies in his hands, Hannah also rose from her stool. “Are you parked in back, Earl?”

  “Yes, I didn’t want to take up your parking spots in front.”

  “Then I’ll walk you out,” Hannah told him, motioning to Norman and Mike to stay seated. “I’ll be right back, guys.”

  Hannah waited until the back kitchen door had closed behind them before she broached the subject of Carrie’s concern. “Carrie’s a little worried about you, Earl.”

  “She is?” Earl looked genuinely surprised. “Why?”

  “Carrie’s afraid that you might use one of those firearms you carry on the snowplow if you see Ross.”

  Earl looked absolutely shocked. “But she ought to know better! I carry those because I sometimes run into wild animals on the country roads when I’m plowing. I can’t believe that Carrie actually thought that I’d do something like that!”

  “Well, she didn’t really think so, but she wanted me to talk to you about it,” Hannah said quickly, doing her best to exonerate Carrie from what could be an argument between husband and wife.

  “Why did she think I’d do something that drastic?” Earl asked her, and Hannah could see that he appeared completely puzzled.

  “She knows how much you like No
rman. And she said you know how much Norman loves me. And she thought . . .”

  Earl began to smile. “That I’d defend your honor or something like that?”

  “Yes, something like that.”

  “Well . . . she’s right in a sense. I would, but not that way! Let’s be honest here, Hannah. I don’t like what Ross did to you one bit! I think it was . . .” Earl paused, and Hannah knew he was trying to think of the correct words to describe how he felt. “I think it was disgraceful and totally unforgivable! And I do believe that Ross should be held accountable for hurting you! A lot of people in town feel the way I do, but I don’t think any of them would actually take any drastic action.”

  “You mean they wouldn’t run him out of town on a rail?”