I’d spent enough time with a man that was supposed to be dead. I was ready to fall face first into bed, next to a woman that didn’t despise me.
**
Chapter Fifteen
Xavier
“Can we have lunch?” I poked my head in Camilla’s office just as she was shutting her computer down. I’d just finished writing my Sunday sermon and my stomach was growling uncontrollably. She looked up at me with happiness in her jade eyes. That was something I hadn’t seen in a long time.
“Um…I was gonna go have lunch with Emmanuel but okay.” She started to text him right then. When she was done she smiled up at me. “Let’s go.”
I drove her to a little bistro that had outdoor seating just so I could see the sunlight in her eyes. “Okay so you must want to talk to me. What is it?” She asked, sipping on a glass of ice water.
“Am I that easy to see through?” I smiled. She lingered on my dimples like she always did and I knew I could still pull her.
“Yes, Xavier.”
“I know you probably already figured it out but I fucked up babe.” I told her with a frown. I reached across the table to hold her hand in mine. I ran my thumb over the back of her smooth hand and realized there was no longer a ring on her finger. I made a mental note to ask her about it later.
“Fucked up like with Christina?” Her tone turned sour and so did her expression.
“Yeah. Like with Christina.” I hated that I even had to explain this stupid shit. I was beyond annoyed with Chris for putting me in this damn situation. Camilla pulled her hand away and looked at me to continue.
“I’m sorry,” I sighed heavily. Camilla shrugged and went back to sipping her water.
“Sorry for what, Xavier? We’re not together right?” Her words were calm but I could tell she was bristling.
“No, but you know we have history. It was fucked up.”
“It was.” She nodded. “If I see her I’ll probably slap the shit out of her. Right now though, I’m tired. I have a lot on my plate and you sticking your dick in my little sister isn’t something I want to deal with.”
“Fair enough.” I plucked a piece of bread from the basket and stared at her as I chewed it. “Where’s your ring?” I asked. Her eyes dropped to her bare ring finger and she gave me a simple shrug.
“Gone. I gave it back to him.” Her full lips looked amazing the way she sucked on that straw.
Focus.
“Yall done?” I asked hopefully. I’d love nothing more than to move back into my house with my woman and my daughter.
“As far as I’m concerned. There’s not much he can do to come back from this shit. He’s just as bad as you.” She grumbled. I placed a hand over my heart and feigned hurt feelings.
“Ouch. I mean, if it’s any consolation I can make it up to you in the bedroom.” I grinned. She curled her top lip up at me in phony disgust.
“No. You stuck your dick in my sister.”
“So, is there no redemption from that? All bets off the table?” I asked.
“What bets were on the table?” She laughed and her eyes lit up. She looked so much like Chloe. Even though I knew better, I was going to take my shot with Camilla if Alexander was out of the picture. She was the mother of my child, it was only right. Besides, she had the best fucking pussy I’d ever been in. I doubted I’d find anything remotely close.
“What do you mean what bets? Whenever your man is out of town and I’m not in a relationship, we’re fucking.” I tucked my bottom lip between my teeth and saw a little color rise to her cheeks.
“Uh huh.” She laughed softly. “Are you in a relationship yet?”
“Maybe. I was thinking about giving her some of your dick tonight.” I joked.
“Don’t.” She warned playfully.
“Why not? You like giving away my pussy.” I pulled my chair next to her and rested my hand on her thigh. She cleared her throat and squirmed a little at my touch.
“Who exactly am I giving it to? I’m still not fucking Emmanuel.”
“Cole? Alexander?” I shrugged. Camilla frowned and shook her head.
“No, not Cole…exactly and definitely not Alexander.”
“So it’s still mine then? Wait what the hell do you mean not exactly with Cole?” I felt a flash of anger surge through me. I knew he was trying to fuck her. Screw all that best friend shit. You don’t just have a best friend like Camilla. She’s too hot and volatile, she begs to be held and touched.
She’s a fucking gorgeous Pandora’s box with a warning sign flashing overhead and yet people still want to open her and possess her. There’s no way in hell any man could just sit by and be her friend. Hell, I could never do it.
“You heard me, Xavier,” she laughed. I squeezed her thigh and then slipped my hand under her skirt. Why the fuck was she always wearing shit to tempt me? Her thighs slammed shut and she gave me a warning glance.
“Stop playing Camilla.” I whispered in her ear.
“You stop.”
The waitress brought our food and grinned at me, making sure I saw that she was working with some serious cleavage. It didn’t go unnoticed.
“Oh my goodness you’re the pastor from TV! Pastor Sanders!” She giggled all over herself while she searched for an ink pen, which ironically was clipped to her blouse right by her breasts.
“Nice to meet you.” I nodded in her direction.
“Can I have your autograph? I don’t have any paper on me. Can you sign my um…” She glanced down at her ample breasts and I chuckled.
“Absolutely not.” Camilla frowned with her arms folded. “You’re honestly going to ask a pastor to sign your damn titties?” She fussed waving her hands in the air. “Girl no. Just no.” She slapped a napkin in the waitress’ hand and said, “Use that. Was that so hard?”
“Oh, I didn’t think about napkins.” She laughed embarrassed. I wasn’t sure how she missed the huge napkin dispenser but maybe it slipped her mind. I signed the napkin and handed it back to her.
“There you go beautiful,” I winked.
“Oh, god you are so fine.” She stammered before walking away making excited noises to the group of waitresses behind us. Camilla was over the entire thing. She grumbled and pushed my hand off her thigh.
“Oh, god you are so fine…” She mocked the waitress with an eye roll.
“I mean at least she’s blessed with good eye sight, Sister White.” I eyed Camilla and she couldn’t help but crack a laugh.
“Shut the hell up, fool. You’re not going to have any problems finding a girlfriend. Every woman is going to throw themselves at your fucking feet.”
“Are you gonna let me have a girlfriend?” I asked her curiously.
“Let you? I can’t stop you.”
“You damn near cursed that poor waitress out and she didn’t even do shit, Camilla. Come on. Stop playing like you don’t get jealous.” My hand was back on her thigh.
“Maybe a little. I promise to be nice to whatever girlfriend you get though.” Her voice was sweet and I could tell she was trying to be honest. I didn’t know how well that would all go over though. I tossed my arm around her shoulders and pulled her in.
“See, this is so nice Xavier. Why the hell do you have to be such a fucking pathological cheater?”
“Same reason you can’t stop fucking Manny. It’s who we are.”
“You think we can really be friends? Like if I end up with Emmanuel and if you end up with some…bitch. I mean, a nice young lady. Can we really be friends without…”
“Without fucking?” I laughed. I kissed her temple and slid my hand up her dress with my free hand. “I don’t know. All I know is I can keep a secret if you can.” My fingers skimmed the outline of her pussy making her arch her back. My dick jerked at her reaction and at how damn good she always smelled.
“You can’t keep a damn secret.” She laughed, spreading her legs a little more for me.
“I can.” I rubbed her thick lips through her silk panties w
hile I gripped my stiff dick.
“No, your attitude tells everything.” She bit her bottom lip and I leaned over to kiss her neck and I didn’t give a fuck who saw Pastor Sander’s kissing the mother of his child. “Xavier, we’re in public.” She half moaned.
“So?” I’ve never given a shit about where Camilla and I were; I wanted her when I wanted her and right then she looked good enough to eat and my dick was hard as a rock.
“So…” My finger slipped inside of her and she gasped. “We have to stop.” I listened to her and pulled my finger out, but not before licking it clean. “Oh my god.” She laughed and turned bright red.
After lunch, we stopped past the day care to check on the kids and found Manny there going back and forth between giving Chloe a piggy back ride and tickling Mason. Camilla grinned from ear to ear just looking at him with the kids. I faked a gag and she nudged me playfully.
“Hey, Emmanuel.” She rubbed his back when he stood up and he grabbed her in a hug. Yeah, I wasn’t getting the pussy tonight. That shit had Manny’s name stamped on it.
Shit.
I tried though.
Even though I shouldn’t have, I offered to take Chloe and Mason off Camilla’s hands for the weekend because I don’t value my fucking sanity at all. I clearly didn’t think any of that shit through because I had nothing for Mason at my house.
I quickly learned the art of wrangling two children into a car and not killing myself on the drive to the store. Now I understood why Camilla said she felt overwhelmed. It felt like every five minutes I was stopping to fuss at my daughter for touching something.
“Oh, you look like you’ve got your hands full.” A voice said. I was too tired to stop and talk. Random folks telling me how cute Chloe and Mason were and how I was such a good dad had been stopping me the whole trip.
“Yeah, kinda,” I grumbled. I looked up into a pair of almond shaped eyes.
“I know the feeling and I only have one.” She laughed. “Keep up the good work.” I was kind of hypnotized by her. She was pretty in an around-the-way girl kinda way. Her natural curly hair was brushed up into a puff and she was wearing a plain t-shirt and sweats.
Once I found my words again, I ran up behind her with my cart. “Hey, what’s your name beautiful?”
“It’s not beautiful,” she frowned. Okay so she was no nonsense. I still thought she was cute.
“So, what is it?” I quizzed as I plucked something out of Chloe’s grasp.
“Monique,” she sighed. “What’s yours?”
“Xavier Sanders.” I held out my hand and she looked at it like she had better things to do. Chloe thought it was hilarious, Mason just stared back and forth between us.
“Damn I can’t get a handshake, Monique?” I frowned dramatically and she gave me a little laugh.
“Nice to meet you, Xavier Sanders.” She slid her small hand in mine and we shook. “Your name sounds familiar.” She scrunched up her button nose at me.
“Yeah, I’m a pastor.” I told her easily.
“Oh, yeah! Okay. I knew I heard your name from somewhere. Well nice to meet you.” I noticed she turned the smiles up a little bit once she realized who I was. “I guess I can hug you since you’re a pastor,” S,she smiled. Monique wrapped her arms around me in a hug and Chloe lost her shit.
“No!” She shouted in a small voice that sounded eerily like Camilla’s. “My daddy!” Monique smiled down at Chloe and nodded sympathetically.
“Yup, your daddy. I’m sorry sweetie. No more hugs.” She told her. Chloe still wasn’t buying it. She just eyed Monique with a scowl. “Oh my god she has beautiful eyes. She must get them from her mom.”
“Oh, she definitely does,” I chuckled.
“Her mother is the mayor’s step daughter right? Camilla Scott.” Just hearing how much she already knew had me wanting to push my cart by her ass and keep shopping. I hated people who were consumed with all the gossip that swirled around us.
“Yeah,” I said slowly.
“She’s beautiful. You’re not with her anymore?” She asked.
“Nah. We’re very good friends though.”
“Oh, I know what very good friends means, ” She smirked. “So, you wanna take my number down?” She asked with a smile. Her entire attitude flipped in a matter of seconds once she found out who I was and whom I was attached to. Monique would only be getting the dick from me. Nothing more.
“Sure.” I put her number in my phone and put a grocery cart emoji next to her name so I’d remember.
“Um…if you’re not doing anything tonight you can call me. My son is with his dad and I’m kinda bored at home so…”
“Nah, I got the kids tonight so that’s not gonna work.”
“I thought you and Camilla only had one child.” She frowned over at Mason. I lowered my brows and instinctively turned the cart away from her view so she couldn’t look at Mason. He wasn’t my son but I loved him like he was and I didn’t want nosey motherfuckers in his face.
“So it was nice meeting you Monique.” I nodded and pushed past her. I could feel her eyes on me as I walked down the aisle.
Fuck that shit. I didn’t know if she was even worth throwing dick to.
I started wondering if I was ever going to be able to settle down with a woman who wasn’t after something from me. Maybe I should just be celibate except when it comes to Camilla. I could never turn her down, no matter how long of a celibacy streak I’d been on. That shit remained true from the very first time we fucked. It’s been her that I’ve wanted ever since.
I looked at Chloe and smiled a little, “You didn’t like her?” I asked in a quiet voice.
“No.” She pouted. “No like her.”
“Yeah, mommy is prettier.” I winked, making her giggle.
Chapter Sixteen
Camilla
Here I thought I was going to be dragging Chloe and Mason to Emmanuel’s for the weekend but turns out Xavier is amazing and took them off my hands for the entire weekend. The joy I felt couldn’t be described in words. I wasn’t even sure a mother should feel that elated to get away from her own children.
“Are you moving in? Shit.” Emmanuel frowned at my bags. He fussed at me as he loaded them on to his muscular arms and I just watched him trying to quell the throbbing between my legs.
Jesus.
It was something about that man and his body that drove me insane. Shit, everything about Emmanuel drove me insane I don’t know who the hell I thought I was fooling.
Once he had my things in the house he made me a much needed drink. I couldn’t get my mind off Alexander and how bad it hurt knowing he was willingly going to Montana to see that bitch. I stood there crying and telling him how hurt I was and that we were getting ready to be over and he still fucking went.
Asshole.
I knocked back two drinks in less than five minutes.
“Okay Cami, you need to slow all the way down.” Emmanuel said taking the glass from my hand.
“No, I need to be all the way fucked up. Ugh, shit was so much easier when I didn’t know Alexander was your brother and he was just my therapist, and I could fuck you and Xavier and…” I made a whining noise and buried my face in my hands.
“Okay maybe you do need another drink.” He laughed and poured me one more.
“Seriously Emmanuel, what the hell is my life right now?” I asked waving my hand around. I really wanted some damn answers. I knew nobody could give them to me though. I just had to go through the motions as usual.
“Your life is fine.” He sighed. He had a couple drinks himself. Good, I liked when Emmanuel was tipsy he wasn’t all in control. He looked over at me and smiled a little. “You’re so fucking beautiful. Even when you’re all conflicted and shit,” he paused a beat. “I don’t even think beautiful is an accurate enough word for you.” He walked over to me and tucked my hair behind my ear.
My heart started thumping the more he closed in on me. I wasn’t in any mood for Emmanuel’s fucking gam
es. If he didn’t fuck me tonight I was going to be livid.
I could feel the heat coming from him and it was making my mouth go dry. I just wanted him to touch me so damn bad.
“You’re perfect Camilla.”
“I don’t feel perfect.” I admitted sadly.
“Well you are. You’re fucking tough and brilliant and I love you” He closed the gap between us and I started to melt. My fingers traced the collar of his shirt and slid down his chest. I loved how well he still kept his body up no matter what.
“I love you too.” I breathed. I couldn’t keep from roaming around on his pectorals, but he wasn’t stopping me so I kept going. My fingers began undoing the tiny buttons on his shirt until he was standing before me in just a wife beater. His chocolate skin glowed under the lights in the kitchen. He looked like fucking chocolate bar and I wanted to lick him.
“Camilla.” He said with that stupid ass warning tone. I didn’t want to hear a warning. I wanted to look at Emmanuel’s muscles and feel them. I wanted to feel him.
“Emmanuel.” I taunted back as I slipped my hands under his tank top and let my palms run up and down his defined abs. Lord this man right here…
“You never told me what I needed to hear,” he grumbled. I rubbed his chest, ignoring him completely. It felt like I was touching a chocolate runway model or something. Emmanuel grabbed my wrists in his hand and glared down at me. Even that turned me on though.
“What do you want to hear, Daddy?” I purred. He smirked at me and pulled me up the steps. Yay! I literally got giddy in the pit of my stomach.
“I want to hear that you’re mine. You’re done with Alexander.” He said in my ear. Even hearing Alexander’s name pissed me off, but I pushed it to the back of my mind.
“I’m done with him, Emmanuel. I want you. I’ve always wanted you. Even when I shouldn’t have.” I admitted in a drunken slip.
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