Television Development

by Bob Levy

  To a great extent the Pretty Little Liars series (the series, not the pilot) was about the four lead girls trying to find out who “A” was and what happened to their dead friend Alison, in other words, the four lead girls actively investigating those mysteries. We didn’t do that in the pilot. We didn’t prove that. In the case of that project we knew the magic of the series was in the power of the mysteries. We knew that if the pilot stories could hook viewers (and the network executives who are their first surrogates) strongly enough into wanting to know answers to those mysteries, that in itself would earn us a series order.

  Because we had four lead characters to introduce (along with all their love interests, friends and family members), we knew we didn’t have the dramatic real estate to achieve all the standard pilot goals. Instead, we chose to pursue the first two creative goals of pilot scripts and to hold off on the third. We bonded the audience to the four lead girls in part by demonstrating their victimization at the hands of “A” (the ultimate high school bully) and by giving each girl a concrete, relatable, stakeful goal. We told six good stories. But we didn’t try to prove the concept. We didn’t show the girls investigating the mysteries. We believed that was our best hope of grabbing the brass ring of a series pickup and building audience interest, and it turns out we guessed right.

  Pilot Script Development Checklist

  I’ve found that most development professionals build a mental checklist of questions they consider as they read and evaluate pilot scripts. Some execs are compulsive and literally keep lists like this, but most learn to intuitively “feel” these questions as they read and evaluate scripts. Here’s my list of some questions I’ve learned to ask:

  ▸ Do I care?

  ▸ Do I care about anyone or anything?

  ▸ Have I developed a rooting interest in any of these characters?

  ▸ Do I care if they get what they want?

  ▸ If not, why not?

  ▸ If not, is the problem the characters?

  ▸ Or is the problem with the story/ies the characters have been placed in?

  ▸ What are the lead character’s (or characters’) goals, if any?

  ▸ Are those goals credible and relatable?

  ▸ Do I believe them?

  ▸ Do I root for them?

  ▸ Are there stakes to those goals?

  ▸ Is there any way we can increase the stakes of those goals?

  ▸ Does the story feel like it takes too long to get started?

  ▸ How can we motivate the lead to get his show on the road and take action quicker?

  ▸ Is there conflict?

  ▸ Is there enough conflict?

  ▸ How can we increase the conflict?

  ▸ Is the antagonist a formidable opponent?

  ▸ Is he just a stock “bad guy” or does the opponent actually have a philosophy, an ideology, a darn good reason for opposing the hero?

  ▸ Is there some surprising validity to the antagonist’s philosophy/view of the world that I wouldn’t have thought of before reading this script (i.e., did I learn something)?

  ▸ Is there action?

  ▸ Is there enough action?

  ▸ Is the action motivated?

  ▸ Are there too many scenes of characters standing around talking?

  ▸ Does the characters’ dialogue express text or subtext?

  ▸ Do they tell us what they think and feel, or does the writer show us these things?

  ▸ Is the dialogue “pipey?” (“Pipey” means weighted down with exposition. Writers “lay pipe” of exposition as needed. Some “pipey” dialogue is occasionally unavoidable.)

  ▸ Are there relationships I want to invest in over the course of the show?

  ▸ Will an audience want to invest in these relationships?

  ▸ What’s the climax of the pilot story/ies?

  ▸ Is there a climax?

  ▸ Is the climax satisfying?

  ▸ Are the ways the hero got to his climax surprising?

  ▸ Did the hero “earn” his climactic victory or defeat? (“Earning” a climactic victory or defeat means the climax resulted – good or bad – because of things the hero did. Less satisfying climaxes result because of coincidence or actions other characters took. The most satisfying climaxes occur as a result of choices and actions taken by the hero.)

  ▸ Did the antagonist get any kind of satisfying comeuppance?

  ▸ If not, can he (without damaging his power in series if his role continues in series)?

  ▸ Does the episode succeed in demonstrating and/or proving the concept?

  ▸ If not, can it do a better job?

  ▸ Does the pilot promise a story engine for the series?

  ▸ Is the pilot about something?

  ▸ Are its themes relevant today?

  ▸ Am I entertained?

  ▸ Do I want to find out what happens in Episode 2?

  ▸ Do I care?

  At the end of the day, development executives are simply professional TV fans who want to be entertained. As CW development head and Executive Vice President Gaye Hirsch puts it, “That every-once-in-a-while magical script where you forget all about your checklist is probably the one that I really want to do.”9

  Notes

  As mentioned in Chapter 2, the writer delivers a first draft to the producer (which is probably not the writer’s actual first draft – the writer rewrites himself until he thinks he’s got something worth showing), the producer gives the writer notes and the writer rewrites. Then the studio execs read and note, and the writer rewrites. Then the network execs read and note, and the writer rewrites. If the network president considers the script a greenlight candidate, the network president notes the pilot script, and the writer rewrites. That’s a lot of notes! What are all these notes about?

  First, let’s look at process, then I’ll look at content. Before anyone delivers notes there are typically “pre-notes.” A “pre-notes” meeting or call is when the multiple producers or production company development executives gather together in an office or on the phone to compare notes, to discuss and debate their various individual reactions to a script and to decide which notes they want to give as a team. The two or three studio development executives also meet and do their own “pre-notes.” The same with the two or three network execs overseeing a pilot script. Each layer of feedback – producers, studio and network – wants its team to be a united front, delivering one consistent set of notes. Receiving contradictory notes from the different layers (which sometimes happens) is bad enough; for a group of producers or studio execs to disagree amongst themselves and deliver contradictory notes is confusing and frustrating to the writer.

  Pre-notes meetings or calls are then followed by the actual notes meeting or call where the team – producers, studio execs or network execs – deliver the notes to the writer.

  Delivering notes to writers (and sometimes to producers and directors) is a large part of the jobs of non-writing development professionals. Even agents sometimes give writer clients notes to help improve pitches or scripts. For most entertainment professionals the goal of delivering notes is to balance critical constructive feedback with encouragement, to motivate the writer to feel positive enough about the project to want to muster the huge resources of energy and emotion to go back and do a lot more work. In general, most producers and executives deliver notes in a style that treats the writer with enormous respect and encouragement.

  One strategy producers and execs use is what’s known as the “executive sandwich.” They begin a notes session by emphasizing the positives the writer has achieved. Then they move on to the actual critical notes. After opening with encouragement and flattery, they might say, “That said, we think there are still some important things to work on….” The actual notes typically comprise the largest section of the session, the meat of the executive sandwich. After the tonnage of notes has put the writer in a state of despair, the notes givers conclude by re-emphasizing the positives, as
suring the writer that everyone knows he’s smart, talented and experienced enough that his next draft will be even more brilliant than the first, and they’re so excited to see what magic he can work. In other words: flattery, flattery, pain, pain, flattery, flattery.

  There are two primary categories of notes: notes and pitches. A note is: “This part of the script isn’t working.” A pitch is: “Here’s a creative suggestion to fix it.” It’s easier to give notes than to pitch fixes. Good notes givers do both and come up with good creative fixes. Interestingly, some writers actually don’t want pitches. They believe that’s their job. But most writers appreciate them. If a non-writer can bail them out with a great creative solution that saves them some “heavy lifting,” they’re all for it.

  As skeptical as most creative people are of notes, the goal of most notes givers is purely and simply to try to make the project better. The goal of most producers and development executives is to make the pilot script a richer, more satisfying, more entertaining experience. “How can we make this a better ride? How can we make the viewer enjoy this pilot more? How can we make this a better version of what it’s trying to be?” As simple as that is, that’s how most producers and development execs think when they approach a pilot script and deliver notes. How can we make the audience care about these characters more? How can we make each character’s journey through this story a deeper, more interesting, more compelling and more entertaining one?

  Typically notes sessions are divided into two major sections, “headlines” and “page notes.” Headlines are overarching notes that affect all or most of the script. “The tone feels a bit off throughout.” “We’re not finding ourselves rooting for the lead character enough, and we’re looking for ways to increase our connection to her overall.” After the notes givers deliver headline notes (which might number one or two or as many as a half dozen – if there are more than six headline notes, there are probably very big problems with the script), the notes givers move on to page notes, flipping through the script in order, page by page, to pages that have specific beats, lines of dialogue or scenes that need to be questioned or noted. There might be ten page notes, there might be 60 or more. Notes sessions – calls or face-to-face meetings, although calls are more common these days – can run anywhere from a half-hour to two hours. Frequently the senior-most member of a given team (producers, studio execs or network execs) delivers the notes, and then a junior member of the team might type them up and email them to the writer by way of follow up.

  ABC President Karey Burke tries to follow a rule that one of her mentors, Brandon Stoddard, a former president of ABC himself, taught her at the outset of her career: Only give five notes. Keep the writer focused on the big-picture issues with the pilot script. Those will ultimately have the greatest impact on the project.10

  Another category of notes producers and execs tend to give are logic and clarity notes. Notes givers highlight points in the story that either don’t make sense, don’t feel motivated or logical, or that are confusing or unclear. Writers often benefit from an “extra sets of eyes” to help figure out where to draw the line between saying too much and not saying enough, to help the reader (and ultimately the viewer) understand what’s going on and why characters do and say what they do, to make sure the reader/viewer stays with and tracks the characters and story.

  Writers often find logic notes especially annoying. Writer personalities tend to be more creative and emotional, and producers and execs can tend to be more linear and literal. Writers occasionally believe viewers will understand the meaning or intention of things in the script that executives “bump on.” (That’s a common notes expression, as in, “I’m bumping on Tom’s line on page 37.”) Writers are especially resistant when more literal-minded execs ask them to have characters spell out their thoughts, motivations or feelings in dialogue, in other words to turn subtext (which should be clear from the context) into text.

  In an ideal world, the development execs and producers who are giving notes and the writers they’re giving notes to are in sync about their intentions, are “making the same movie,” as industry people often say. The Handmaid’s Tale and Fargo non-writing EP Warren Littlefield has a unique approach to notes:

  What I’m trying to understand first and foremost – either in a pitch or a script – is what’s it about? What do you want to say as an artist? Define the thematic because once we’re in sync on that we can understand whether the scenes and the stories are supporting and building on that, or whether they’re just kind of floating out there and not adding to what it is we’re trying to create.11

  People on the receiving end of notes frequently hold post-mortem conversations after a notes session to try to comprehend the “notes behind the notes.” Producers do follow-up calls with writers after studio and network notes sessions to assess the input they’ve just received and sometimes to calm highly exercised partners. While development professionals are polite and professional to each other as a rule, and writers almost always end notes sessions by thanking the notes givers for their input, behind closed doors cursing and name-calling are not unheard of. If the notes don’t appear to make a lot of sense or sound like they’re not in sync with what the writer was trying to achieve in the script, the writer and her producer partners might try to figure out what the underlying problem is at the root of the note. What was the real underlying problem the exec was trying to identify and how can we address that problem? Those are the “notes behind the notes.” Sometimes this process feels like an attempt at mindreading, but sometimes it’s actually fruitful. A good producer can be very effective at calming a confused and angry writer, helping him comprehend the notes behind the notes and working with him to come up with constructive, creative solutions to address them.

  Justified creator/showrunner and Sneaky Pete showrunner Graham Yost says,

  The trick for me is waiting three days. When I first get them it’s, ‘These are the stupidest notes I’ve ever heard.’ The second day it’s, ‘Well, there are a couple we could answer,’ and by the third day it’s, ‘You know what, they got a point there, let’s take a look at that.’ That doesn’t mean there aren’t some really stupid notes. The mistake I make at certain points is trying to point that out.12

  Other notes fall into the category of network brand notes. “Our viewers tend to expect X from our shows,” network execs might say, and they try to guide the writer to steer the pilot script toward being more like other shows on the network. These kinds of notes often go toward the tonal range that networks prefer. Network development executives often have in mind the regular viewers who watch their shows and the feedback they get from them. They know their audience’s demos, who’s watching and what those viewers like and expect from their shows.

  The notes process is theoretically a creative one but also inherently a political one. On most projects network development executives and studio development executives find themselves in creative sync. Both teams identify the same problems with a draft of a script and work together to come up with solutions. Once in a while, the two teams of execs find themselves seeing a draft, or even the entire project, from very different perspectives. Veteran studio development executive Jane Francis, the Executive Vice President of Fox 21, the boutique studio within 20th Television that produces for cable and streaming, says that, like so much else in development, it comes down to relationships. “When you do this for a long time everyone becomes your friend,” she says.

  Once you develop those relationships, you can call your friend and figure it out. You’re doomed if you don’t get along. Who gets caught in the middle? The writer. You have to create an environment where the development experience is great for the writer.13

  Writers and producers want to demonstrate respect and appreciation for their network and studio partners, but they also want to make sure they’re putting their project’s best foot forward creatively. This can be tricky. They sometimes have to decide to do a note even if they think it mig
ht hurt the script. Ignoring a note risks offending a powerful person, an exec whose personal investment and support is crucial to the project. There’s a fear that not doing enough of an executive’s notes will alienate that person and turn him off not only the project but the writer’s (or producer’s) long-term career. Nobody wants to develop a reputation as “difficult to work with” or “not collaborative.” In recent years, most writers (even the best and most powerful) work very hard to do as many of their executive partners’ notes as possible. Network executives especially are shown enormous respect. In general writers and producers are emotionally closer to their studio executives, but they know that the network holds the ultimate greenlight power and therefore their execs and their notes hold the greatest weight.

  A writer once told me that her strategy is to do notes she doesn’t agree with as long as they don’t damage the dramatic and thematic heart of her script. She said she knows that so much of the work is purely subjective, and she’s often comfortable giving an executive their subjective preferences over her own, as long as they don’t undermine what her project is fundamentally about and why she thinks it fundamentally works. Television, as I’ve said throughout, is a team sport, and letting another player shine can often lead to victory.

  Notes

  1 Technically, the first episode of a straight-to-series project would be called “episode one” rather than a “pilot” because no pilot will be made. People in the industry still tend to refer to these scripts in conversation as “pilot” scripts (probably out of force of habit).

  2 “Beats” are small dramatic units that comprise scenes. A beat is a line of dialogue, an exchange of dialogue among characters or the description of action about one thought or one moment in a scene. When the subject of that one thought is over, the scene moves on to the next beat. Writers, directors and actors typically break scenes down into specific beats to analyze and discuss them.