The Witch's Heart

by Christopher Penczak

  Magickal Morality

  When modern Witches think about such Old World ideas in terms of morality, they are often repulsed, and understandably so. Yet Witchcraft is the exploration of the dark, of the things other people shun and fear. We must look at that side of ourselves and look at our history and the deeper implications of the entire issue before we judge not only what is right for us but also what has been right in the past and what will be right in the future.

  Many of the cultures where magick has been considered “dark” have been cultures with people far less politically, socially, and economically empowered compared to today’s standards. Medieval magick has a history of sexual curses, such as spells designed to cause impotence in a man. When we look at these things today, we automatically assume how awful they are. But in the medieval times, a woman was entirely dependent upon her husband, and if he left her for a younger woman or had an affair and had to take care of children from that affair, she was in jeopardy financially and personally. There were no opportunities or options for self-reliance, so such magick kept a man home and faithful. Is it manipulative? Certainly. Yet with a people living in a harsh world with less time to ponder ethics, magick was a practical, problem-solving tradition.

  Other cultures that have similar magick, or that advocate and encourage love spells for specific people, such as Voodou, Santería, and Hoodoo, come from economically poor cultures. The practice of these magicks in parts of the United States and Canada has influenced the development of modern Witchcraft in North America, as traditional Hoodoo and Voodou formulas have made their way into Witchcraft formularies and Books of Shadow.

  Voodou developed in a slave culture where the practitioners were completely socially disempowered. Magick was the only way to be empowered, and if you wanted something to happen, you simply wanted it to happen to protect or better your life, which was most likely harsh, cruel, and difficult to change. Love, romance, and sex represented economic avenues to change your condition in life or escape and distract yourself from the difficulties. They did not, and many still do not, have the luxury of contemplating the grander ethical questions, as basic life needs are not being met.

  The same magicks have risen time and again, in different form but addressing the same fundamental needs, be it with the peasants in Italy, the rural poor in England, or the slave population in the South. A Witch, priestess, or other magickal practitioner of the community was an expert in these arts and in helping people however the person chose to be helped.

  In such times and cultures, it was believed the one who was hiring the Witch to do the spell was ultimately responsible for the consequences of it; the magickal practitioner was just the hired hand who supplied knowledge, information, or technical work but were not morally engaged. And in such cultures, the client simply had to be prepared to pay the consequences of such magick, knowing full well the spell could work to their satisfaction or backfire. And it was most often the client who paid the price, rather than the practitioner, for the client—even if he or she was not present at the ritual—was providing the impetus for the work. Are you prepared to pay the “coin” of your wish, or are the stakes too high for you? Only you can determine where the line is and what stake is too high, for all magick contains risk and nothing is ever 100 percent completely safe, just like life.

  The Moral Love Spell

  When we look at the history of all forms of love magick, we see a wide range of applications, but the most asked question is, “Can you do a love spell for someone specific?” You most certainly can, but the better question is, “Should you do a love spell for someone specific?”—and that opens up a whole different debate.

  If you look at folk magick traditions from across the world, you most certainly can do a love spell for a specific person. You can find it in ancient Western magickal papyri, European wortcunning, Hoodoo, and Santería. Much of our magickal culture has traditionally been about getting what you want, and many practitioners of folk magick come from peasant cultures who are looking to survive and thrive in an often hostile world. Magick was a tool to gain a measure of control, safety, and success; it was not necessarily the high spiritual art that most of us think of today. That’s not to say that simple folk magick cannot be incredibly spiritual and part of a much larger tradition, but the vast majority of customers for the local cunning woman, root doctor, or bruja are not interested in having a deeply moving spiritual experience. They are coming to get physically healed, be blessed, make money, have a healthy crop or herd, and get or keep a romantic or sexual partner.

  So there is obviously a history to such magick, and that is where we gain a lot of our lore of aphrodisiacs. The immediate complaint from most people is that doing a spell on someone specific to be your lover is manipulative. You are taking away their free will and thereby doing evil. Yet we use things like aphrodisiacs, which at one time were considered magick. When we are attracted to someone, we flirt. We speak in a way that is not our normal way of speaking, to attract attention, to flatter, and to intrigue. We wear flattering clothing. We wear cologne, perfume, or oils. We give gifts or flowers. If we make it to a social setting, such as a dinner date, we have romantic, sensual foods with tastes and scents that engage an atmosphere of romance. If this all leads to a relationship, the behavior often stops once the relationship becomes more solid.

  In retrospect, isn’t this a form of manipulation? Is it a form of deception, to make someone do what you want? But the person, your romantic target, agreed to it; no one forced them to pay attention. No one forced them on a date, or to have sex, or whatever the end result was. In many ways, yes, this was manipulation, yet it is accepted as the way things are in our society. This is part of the mating process.

  Magickal practitioners who are against specific love magick will be the first to point out that wearing a perfume and performing a magick ritual are two different things. The difference between giving flowers and directing a spell toward someone is like the difference between night and day in terms of the amount of energy, of personal magickal voltage, that is put in each action. And they would be right, to a certain degree, yet a spell is simply an amplification of these behaviors and intentions by someone who knows how to consciously work with energy. There are many people unconsciously working with energy and intention that we would never call spellcasters, yet they can get powerful results.

  While I’m not necessarily an advocate for casting love spells on specific people, it’s important to look at all sides of the situation and realize that those who do decide to do so are no more despicable or evil than those who are great flirts and seducers. They are simply working with much more potent tools.

  Whether you decide to cast a love spell on a specific person or not depends on your own code of personal ethics, justice, and morality. One of the reasons why many modern practitioners will not cast a love spell on someone is that they feel it is unethical. Many adherents of the Wiccan Rede will say that manipulating someone’s will violates the Wiccan Rede.

  The Wiccan Rede is a much longer section of poetry, but its most important teaching is usually summed up in the lines, “An’ it harm none, do as ye will.” A rede is good advice, not a law, and basically it says that you can do whatever you want unless you are harming yourself or others. There is a wide range of philosophy and ideas that can be attached to those two simple lines, particularly around the concept of will, but that is how the teaching is conveyed in its most basic form.

  So adherents to the Wiccan Rede will say that specific love spells are harmful and that the Wiccan Rede tells you not to do them. Technically it doesn’t if you are not harming the person. Yet if you define having someone fall in love with you as harm, then I guess you are. People look at the Wiccan Rede as a variation on the Golden Rule, popularized in Christianity but found in many religions. Basically, if you wouldn’t want something done to you, don’t do it to someone else. Many modern Witches believe in
the Law of Return, or Law of Three, stating that whatever you do comes back to you threefold. If you manipulate someone’s will, you are opening yourself up to being manipulated three times as strong. Since no one wants to be manipulated themselves, they refrain from such behavior.

  Even though I’m a strong believer in the value of the Wiccan Rede, I was taught that it was fine to do a love spell on a specific person. We end all our spells with these or similar words: “I ask this spell to be for the highest good of all involved, harming none” or “I ask this spell to be in accord with divine will.” Basically, we are asking that if the spell was to harm us or another, then the spell should short-circuit and not work, rather than do harm to us or another. I was taught that if you can do a spell for a specific person and keep the spirit of these lines, then it is fine. If a relationship with this person will cause no harm in the big scheme of things, or if it’s in accord with divine will, then it will occur. If not, you have to be open to that fact and be okay with the spell’s failure.

  Easier said than done.

  I agree wholeheartedly with the teaching, but I’ve found personally, and through counseling dozens of Witches in this form of love magick, that by the time you get to a headspace where you’ve formed a specific attachment to someone that’s strong enough that you want to do a spell, then you want what you want and probably don’t give a damn about higher will. You assume since you are attracted it must be fate, it must be higher will, but you still need to do a spell to convince your potential partner.

  I know a number of Witches who have done this, including a covenmate who put a lot of energy into the first part of her spell, about what she wanted, and very little into the “harming none for the highest good” part. She got what she asked for, but one could argue if it was for her highest good.

  The man she was attracted to did begin a romantic and sexual relationship with her. She didn’t know, and he never told her, that he was engaged to be married. Now, the spell did not make him cheat, in my opinion. We later found out that he was with many other women while he was engaged. The relationship only lasted a few weeks. She found out and felt morally compelled to end the relationship, yet she was heartbroken, thinking she had found “the one.” For those who see no value in the Law of Three, I could argue that it took her at least three times as long, if not longer, to get over him than it took him to get over her. In some ways, I think even though it was a very hurtful and seemingly unnecessary situation, it still was for her highest good. She learned a valuable lesson on the power of magick, and I got a great teaching story without having to experience it directly myself.

  While you can successfully do such magick, I would urge you to think about your long-term goals. What do you want? While I’ve seen specific magick work, rarely have I seen it evolve into a lifelong partnership. The connection is intense, immediate, and magnetic, and it dissipates quickly unless you put a lot more magick into it. Eventually, you get settled, and without the magick, it dissipates and fizzles out.

  I have seen nonspecific love magick that is a spell for a kind of person—the person who matches the qualities on your list rather than for a specific individual you know—bear amazing fruit. I’ve seen such relationships blossom into spiritual, powerful committed relationships. I feel I’m the recipient of the blessings of such magick in my own life and marriage. If that is what you are looking for, you might consider such nonspecific love magick over specific love magick.

  Love magick for a nonspecific person not only circumvents this difficult moral quagmire on ethics but also opens you to potential blessings you did not even know existed. By letting the Divine play matchmaker, you are trusting in divine wisdom to bring you what you need, rather than assuming you know everything you need to know about a specific person, to truly know they are the right match for you. When you let go of your specific-person limitations, you give the magick an opportunity to work on a much deeper level, for much greater success.

  When you do a love spell for a specific person, you have two options: either that person responds to it favorably or the person doesn’t. If the person doesn’t respond to it, there is no other option, no other avenue for that magick: the spell fails. While I do think it’s possible to mesmerize and coerce people with some forms of magick, with general love spells, I don’t think many people’s wills truly can be forced. If someone is utterly unattracted to you or is of a different sexual orientation, there is little magick can do to make you attractive to them in the long term. You can influence thoughts and emotions fleetingly or you can arouse sexual energy in general and make yourself readily available, but it’s not long and deep lasting love.

  If you do have sufficient magickal strength and lack any concern about higher will or the highest good, and you can bend someone to your will, most people would consider that a form of psychic attack. Even if the target responds with romantic interest in you, it usually doesn’t turn out the way you truly desire. The target can become emotionally unbalanced as the psyche attempts to unconsciously fight off this attack, or the target can become obsessive toward you, disregarding your own feelings and boundaries as the spell takes on a stronger life of its own.

  When you do a love spell for a type of relationship or a kind of person, you have many options. You have left many doors open, and the universe can align you with someone who fits your criteria and who is also looking for someone whose criteria you fit. You might have never guessed this person fit your criteria or, until the magick was cast, have a reason to meet this person, but when you do, the strands of fate move, and your paths cross under exactly the right circumstances.

  Soul Mates, Fate, and Ethics

  One of the moral issues around love magick is the concept that everybody has one—and only one—person that is right for him or her in this entire lifetime. We call such people soul mates or twin flames and will discuss them more in chapter 9. When you are looking for a partner, I find the concept of soul mates, twin flames, or any other notion that puts the idea that one and only one person is out there for you very destructive. I’m a romantic at heart, and my teachings on this upset many romantics, but it has been my experience personally and the best advice I have in guiding others.

  I believe there are many people out there with whom you are mutually attracted, compatible, and able to build a relationship. I think the terms soul mate and twin flame can denote a deep spiritual connection to someone, but it doesn’t necessarily mean a romantic connection. We have had many loves in past incarnations, many connections. In truth, we are all connected by the web of life. I do believe in “life mates,” a person with whom you can build a lifetime relationship, but just because you’ve had a romantic relationship with someone in a past life doesn’t mean if you both incarnate in the same place at the same time that you’ll be lovers again. You could be siblings, parent/child, friends, or even enemies. Looking for that one perfect fit excludes you from the world of possibilities.

  Some who believe in one exclusive soul partner get stuck on a specific person and assume they have greater spiritual knowledge to realize they are soul mates, so they rationalize that the magick to get this person is not manipulative. The target will soon realize “we are meant to be together.” To assume you know the fate of another person and not even entertain the possibility you are wrong, and to do magick based on your assumption, is some of the worst magick possible. If it truly is your fate, your higher will, don’t try so hard. You will come together. If you feel the need to force it, that’s a sure sign that it’s not your higher will to be together.

  People can become fanatical and not understand why the magick didn’t work out, or blame the other person, saying he or she was not “spiritual enough” to pick up on the love vibrations between them. Unfortunately, in that view, if you don’t acknowledge your mistake, you’ll think you should be alone for the rest of your life because your one true love rejected you. This view creates some pretty tragi
c situations.

  Those who believe in one exclusive soul partner but don’t know who it is will often hold potential partners to an unattainable high standard without holding themselves to the same standard. They will dismiss perfectly suitable partners because the partner didn’t live up to their expectations of a soul mate. That’s why it’s important to make a list not only of the qualities you want in a partner, but also of the qualities you are offering. You must make sure you are equal and balanced to each other. You don’t need to have the same qualities, but if you are expecting a partner to be perfect for you on all levels, you must be willing to hold yourself to the same standard and be honest with yourself and your qualities. I’d argue that none of us are perfect, so how can our partner be perfect and anticipate all our wants and needs without even knowing us?

  Those who can have intention and be open to unseen blessings stand the best chance of having amazingly successful love magick. If you can be clear about what kind of person and relationship you want but be open to how that manifests and with whom you create it, you will not only fulfill your dreams but go far beyond anything you can conceive of now.

  exercise}Examining Your Ethics About Love,

  Lust, and Romance Magick