The Sweetest Seduction, Breakaway Hearts
Page 19
Ask him about the letters and find out the truth.
But she was too chicken to do it. To ask him about the letters meant bringing up Zach, and that wound was still too close to the surface.
Besides, she hardly knew anything about Ben other than he was great in bed. And a good hockey player—maybe the best goalie in the NHL. And he really didn’t seem to have a bad rep for fighting or partying. In fact, the only media coverage he got was in highlight reels of his jaw-dropping saves.
In other words, he actually seemed to be a pretty decent guy. Maybe even a little bit romantic, holding on to her letter all these years.
She groaned and banged her head against the back door. Keep thinking like that, and you’ll be back in his bed and knocked up before Sochi.
She fished out her keys to the rink and locked the back door. The summer sun beat down on her back and shoulders, easing the fatigue from them. It was a perfect day to drive up into the hills and enjoy the scenery before going to work.
“How was practice?” a familiar male voice asked from behind her.
Hailey jumped and turned around.
Ben stood a couple of yards away with a bemused smile on his face.
“Don’t you have anything better to do than stalk me?” She marched past him and threw her gear into the back of her truck.
“No, not really. I’m still new in town, after all.” He followed her to the truck. “If I could get someone local to give me a tour and point out some of the things to do, maybe I could find a suitable distraction.”
She braced her outstretched arm on the back of the Jeep. A snort of amusement rose from her chest. “You’re not going to give up, are you?”
“I think you already know the answer to that question.” He was so close, his breath bathed the back of her neck. “Care to show me around?”
She closed her eyes and tried to squelch the reflexive wave of desire that flowed through her veins from being this close to him. The spicy scent of his cologne was both arousing and comforting. It made her want to tuck her head under his chin and press her nose against his neck so she could breathe him in.
He caught her chin on his finger and guided her head around until she faced him. His eyes pleaded with her the same way Zach’s had when he’d wanted something. “Please.”
And just like with her son, she couldn’t say no. “Fine.” She pushed his hand away. “But we’re riding in my car.”
He regarded her beat-up SUV with one squinty eye. “Are you sure that thing is safe?”
“Yes.” She climbed into the driver’s seat and offered a silent prayer he’d back out.
“Are you sure you wouldn’t prefer to take my car?”
She shook her head. “I wouldn’t be comfortable driving a car that costs as much as my home.”
“I could drive, and you just tell me where to go.”
“Like a man would listen to a woman giving directions.”
“I had no problem following your directions before.”
Her cheeks grew warm when she realized he was referring to their one night together. “Listen, Kelly, you wanted a tour, and I’m willing to give it to you, but under my terms. We’re taking my truck because I know it can handle the roads around here. Now get in or let me go.”
She started the engine, and he scrambled around to the passenger side much faster than a man with a bum knee should. Yep, he was definitely hiding behind his injury.
But when he climbed into his seat and took in the worn interior, a new emotion washed through her—embarrassment. She tightened her hold on the steering wheel. “I know it’s not a fancy Land Rover—”
“It’s fine.” He buckled his seatbelt and gave her a half grin. “Like you said, it can handle the roads around here.”
She eased out of the parking lot, the tingle in the base of her spine letting her know she was still very aware of his presence. “You already know where the ice rink is,” she said in her best tour-guide voice as she turned right. “This is the main drag of Cascade. Over there is the grocery store, the hardware store. You already know the Sin Bin. And there’s the medical clinic.”
He nodded as she pointed out all the major businesses along the road. “It’s a pretty small town if you don’t include the resort.”
“Yeah, but I wouldn’t want to live anywhere else. It’s like having an extended family.”
“So everyone keeps telling me. I’ve heard more than once that they take care of their own.” He turned to her. “Especially when it comes to you.”
She shrugged, even though her cheeks grew warm. “They all know I have one shot left at the Olympics, and they want to help me get there. Lou lets me use the ice rink off hours for free as long as I clean up afterward. Gus has been taping me play so I can show the coaches what I have to offer. Pop keeps my hours flexible at the Sin Bin.”
“Yep, just like a big family.” He eased back in his seat. “Making it to Sochi is a pretty big deal to you, isn’t it?”
A twinge of pain formed in her heart, reminding her of her promise to Zach. “More important than anything in my entire life.”
“Why didn’t you try out for the Canadian team earlier?”
Her breath hitched. Did he know? Or was he just fishing for information? She chose her words carefully. “Life got in the way.”
“That’s what Cindy said.”
Time to remind Cindy to keep her mouth closed. “Oh?”
“Yeah, but she refused to elaborate on it. Like I said, they all seem especially protective of you.”
“It could just be because you’re not from around here.” She stopped at the intersection leading up to the resort. “Do I need to give you a tour up there?”
“Not really. I’m already familiar with that side of the mountain.” It was her chance to end the tour right there and be done with him, but then he added, “Care to show me some of your favorite spots?”
Hailey gripped the steering wheel, weighing the risk of spending more time with him against not. But if she took him to the overlook, maybe it would give her an opportunity to bring up Zach. She turned onto the next road, heading away from the resort. “Hang on, then. It’s going to get bumpy.”
The paved part of the road ended a couple of miles from the intersection and turned into a gravel trail leading up the opposite mountain. Ben grabbed the handle over the door and silently held on, his face tense, as she navigated the steep incline she knew by heart. Even with four-wheel drive, it was a slow climb, but after twenty minutes, they came to the flat outcropping along the ridge.
The morning clouds had burned off, revealing miles of jagged peaks as far as the eye could see. Off in the distance, a strip of blue water sparkled like a tiny diamond hidden to all but those who knew to look for it. Cold wind whipped off the surrounding glaciers as she got out of the truck, frosting her breath and invigorating her soul. This place was as much a part of her as the hockey rink.
She turned in time to catch Ben’s openmouthed gasp and chuckled. “Other than the ice, this is my favorite spot in town.”
“I can see why.” He climbed out, leaving his cane inside, and joined her in front of the Jeep. “I didn’t even know this place existed.”
“Most outsiders don’t.” She climbed onto the warm hood of her car and pulled the sleeves of her fleece over her hands. “I dread the day they discover it and try to build another resort on this slope.”
“The town wouldn’t let that happen, would they?”
Her eyes stung as she remembered the time she’d brought Zach up here and he’d asked her the exact same question. She pulled her knees up to her chest and gave Ben the same answer she’d given her son. Her voice cracked. “Not if we can help it.”
He tilted his head to the side, his expression quizzical, and she waited for him to ask her what was wrong. The corners of his mouth turned down, his bottom lip protruding ever so slightly in the process.
Her heart thudded, and her stomach coiled into a knot. Tell him, her mind screa
med, but her tongue refused to obey. If she dared to open her mouth, she might start crying. No, she couldn’t afford to show him any weakness.
Thankfully, he didn’t press the issue. “This place is special to you, isn’t it?”
She nodded and pressed her cheek on top of her knees. The last time she’d come up here had been when she scattered Zach’s ashes last summer. He’d loved this place as much as she did. It had seemed only fitting that he became part of it.
Ben moved in front of her and rested his hands on her hips, pulling her closer to him. “Then thank you for sharing it with me.”
It was all too easy to melt into his arms. He tucked her head under his chin, and his scent steadied her, just like she’d imagined. In his chest, his heart drummed with a calm, predictable beat that was nothing like the man in front of her. Ben Kelly was anything but predictable, and being this close to him did little to calm her. Her pulse danced, sloughing off her sorrow in the process. She’d come up here to tell him about the past, but much to her surprise, she began to wonder if she had a future with him.
As if he knew what was going through her mind, he pulled away just enough for his lips to find hers. Unlike the previous kiss, this one was slow and gentle. She pressed her palms against his chest, trying so hard to resist. And yet she fell further under his spell. She curled her fingers around the lapels of his jacket and kissed him back.
Instead of a raging inferno that left her wanting to shed her clothes, this kiss produced a warm glow that started in her chest and spilled over into her veins like a shot of Crown Royal on a frosty night. It drove away the chill, the grief, the void that had filled her since Zach’s death, and gave her something new to cling to.
She’d known from the moment she’d met Ben that he was different from any other man she’d ever known. He made her heart flop and her blood boil. He made her feel things she didn’t want to feel—passion, desire, anger, hatred. But for a moment, she contemplated what giving him that second chance would lead to.
He pulled away, his breath shaking, and cupped her cheeks in his hands. “Hailey,” he said in a raw, whispered moan that tore straight to her core.
It would be all too easy to follow him back to his place and repeat that one night they’d shared.
A wave of panic rose into her throat as the thought entered her mind. If she gave into that temptation, would she suffer the same consequences as before?
This time, she had no trouble pushing him away. She slid off the hood of the truck and mumbled, “I need to get to work.”
The magic of the moment vanished, and they were back to being two strangers on opposite sides of the truck. Ben turned away, his shoulders slumped, and stared off into the distance until she started the engine. When he climbed back into the truck, he moved like a man twice his age.
Hailey kept her eyes fixed on the road on the way down, ignoring her passenger. Bit by bit, Ben was tearing away the image she’d carried of him all these years. The more time she spent with him, the harder it became to despise him. The famous hockey player who’d denied ever knowing her faded away, leaving behind a quiet romantic who’d kept a reminder of a one-night stand in his wallet for nine years.
The silence on the way back to the ice rink widened the space between them. By the time she pulled into the parking lot, she’d managed to restore her barriers. “I hope you enjoyed the tour.”
His smile didn’t reach his eyes. “I did. Thank you.” He grabbed his cane and climbed out of the truck. “Any chance you would change your mind about dinner?”
She swallowed hard, drowning the urge to say yes. Her gaze fell to the cane he obviously didn’t need. Maybe if she pushed him to get back into the game, they could heal each other. “Not a chance, Kelly.”
He gave her an exaggerated sigh. “I thought as much. See you around.”
She waited a moment after he slammed the door and watched him return to his Land Rover, trying to sort out her mixed feelings for him. Her heart and her mind warred with each other. When no clear resolution appeared, she drove to the Sin Bin and sat in her truck until she saw Ben drive past her. Then she dashed across the street to the medical clinic.
“Hi, Lisa,” she said as she passed the receptionist. “Is Jen with a patient right now?”
“Nope, she’s on lunch for the next ten minutes.”
“Perfect.” It was plenty of time to use her best friend as a sounding board.
Jen sat in her office, picking at a salad while she surfed the Web for baby gear. The glow in her cheeks complemented the growing bump that strained against her dress. She was due in two months, and the town was already anxious about who would fill her position in the clinic while she was on maternity leave.
Hailey knocked on the door. “Got a minute?”
“Always.” She flipped her dark hair over her shoulder and grinned. “What’s going on?”
Hailey slid into the empty chair beside the desk and rubbed her arms. She’d known Jen for as long as she could remember, but an unfamiliar cloak of awkwardness enveloped her as she tried to find her words. “You know that IUD thing you did a couple of years ago? It’s still good, right?”
Jen arched a brow, her brown eyes full of questions. “It’s good for five years.”
“And it’s as effective as having my tubes tied, right?”
“It is, but if you’re thinking about hooking up with that new guy in town, I’d recommend using a condom for backup.”
“Wait, how did you—” Hailey jumped up from her chair. “Are there any secrets in this town?”
Jen laughed and shook her head. “I was wondering when you’d tell me about him. So, what’s the scoop?”
“Just that he’s the most frustrating and confusing man I’ve ever met.” She paced the cramped length of the office. “I know I should stay far away from him, but—”
“But what? From what I hear, he’s good looking and has a thing for you.” Jen stuffed a forkful of salad in her mouth. “Oh, and he leaves outrageous tips for Cindy.”
“That’s only because he was trying to pump her for information.”
“Even better. It shows he’s really into you. And it’s about time you started dating again.”
“It’s not that simple.” She stopped and combed her fingers though her hair, working up her courage to share her secret with her best friend. “Ben and I have a little bit of history.”
Jen’s jaw dropped in tandem with her fork. “Ben? As in Mr. Oh-My-God-the-Best-Sex-Ever Ben?”
Hailey nodded and stared at the floor.
“But that would make him…” Her friend’s voice drifted off before she could say what they both dared not mention. Jen straightened in her chair. “Does he know about Zach?”
“I’m not sure.”
“What do you mean, you’re not sure? Either you’ve told him, or you haven’t.”
“Damn it, Jen, I tried to tell him when Zach was sick, but I have no idea if he ever got my letters.” She slumped back in the chair and rubbed the back of her neck. “Nine years of nothing, and bam! He shows up in our little town and is asking for a second chance.”
“Was he looking for you?”
“I don’t think so. I mean, it all seems to be one big coincidence.”
“Or fate.” Jen clapped her hands together and gave a little squee of excitement. The woman had obviously been reading too many romance novels. “So what are you going to do about him?”
“What can I do? I mean, if I get mixed up with him again, then I not only run the risk of missing out on my last chance to make the Olympics, I could also get hurt again.”
Jen nodded, urging her to continue.
Hailey gulped. Now came the tough part—exposing that hidden urge she didn’t like admitting she had. “But truthfully, I’m finding it harder and harder to say no. The physical attraction is still there.”
“And what about Zach?”
The question hit her like a punch to the gut and reminded her she was a coward. “I’m s
cared to bring him up.”
“Why?”
“Because I’m scared he’ll leave me all over again.” She wrapped her arms around her stomach and doubled over in the chair. “If he truly didn’t know about Zach, then how do you think he’ll react when I tell him? Zach’s gone, and there’s nothing I can do to change it.”
“But he deserves to know about his son.”
“Easy for you to say.” Her gaze fell to the hand that rested on her friend’s pregnant belly and the wedding ring Jen wore. “You’re happily married to man who knows his child is on the way.”
Jen pursed her lips together and rocked from side to side in her desk chair. “What’s really at stake here?”
Her fingers went cold, and her mouth went dry. She licked her lips. “I’m scared I’ll fall even harder for him than I did and end up in worse shape than before. I made a promise to Zach, and I intend to keep it. But Ben could distract me so much, I could forget all about it.”
“Oh, sweetie.” Jen reached out and took her hand. “I know the timing sucks, but it is a second chance to make things right. I mean, does he sound like he’s just looking for another one-night stand, or does he seem to want more?”
The memory of their kiss on the ridge filled her mind. No, it wasn’t the kiss of a man looking for a wham-bam good time. It was the kiss of a man who was trying to let her know he was willing to be patient until she came around. “The latter.”
“Then take things slowly and see what happens. But don’t keep a Zach a secret for too long.” She reached into her desk drawer and pulled out one of the safe-sex condoms she handed out to patients. “You might want to keep this within reach, though, in case it’s needed.”
The corner of her mouth rose into a half smile, in spite of her desire not to laugh. She took the condom and stuffed it into her pocket. “I can control myself now, you know. I’m not some horny eighteen-year-old anymore.”
“No, you’re worse. You already know how good he is in bed. It’s like you’ve had your first taste of rich chocolate, and you won’t be satisfied until you can get some more.”