Hindsight

by AA Bell

  ‘She survived?’ Mira asked, astounded.

  ‘Promoted. Garland offered her a choice of sweet assignments.’

  ‘I sent her a room full of flowers,’ Gabby said. ‘All the things Ben told me she did, trying to keep up his spirits, even when she was in a bad way herself. What a woman!’

  ‘No thanks to the Greppias and that slimebag Constable Moser,’ Mira said.

  ‘Could have been worse,’ Lockman replied. ‘Penance is still pending for that dirty cop, although his brother and the other Fed detective escorted him south over the border to kick-start a new career for him via a stint in the military — courtesy of General Garland, naturally. She’s still hunting Colonel Kitching and Mr Mystery, so no doubt she’s got plans afoot for using one slimebag to find another, so to speak.’

  ‘I don’t understand why she killed her last opportunity using the snipers,’ Mira replied. ‘One minute we were fighting for our lives, and the next the whole crew dropped dead around us. I’ve never heard anything like it.’

  ‘I can explain that,’ Lockman said. ‘I need to show you something else anyway … Gabby, do you mind if I take her home this morning?’

  ‘Sure, Adam. I can take Ben’s car to the hospital. It’s a sweet ride since that nice general returned it.’

  ‘She’s not nice,’ Mira argued. ‘And since when are you two on a first-name basis?’

  ‘Since he saved our lives.’ Gabby hugged Lockman goodbye first, then Mira, making her feel all the more lonely and disconnected. She listened to the garage door roll open and waved numbly as Gabby drove away, then realised she’d only heard one vehicle arrive in the first place.

  ‘Did you two come together?’

  ‘Nothing gets past you.’ He led her to the idling vehicle.

  Paying closer attention to the sound of the engine, she realised it sounded less familiar than she’d first realised — more like his Hilux than Gabby’s Landcruiser — and as he helped her up into the invisible seat, she realised the height from the ground was different too, and inside smelled like nothing she’d ever known. It smelled new and oddly welcoming.

  ‘New car?’ she asked.

  ‘First prize in the Straddie Classic.’

  ‘You won?’

  Instead of answering, he closed her door, limped around the front of the car and climbed in behind the wheel, but she wasn’t letting him off so easily when she needed answers to so many other important questions.

  ‘How could you win, when the competition finished last week?’

  ‘I was the bait.’ He chuckled and gunned the engine. ‘Do you remember the shots fired from those two Blackhawks that came in for the airlift? Finnigan stopped a seven-metre Great White from making a snack of me. The second chopper used a gas-powered grappling hook to drag off the carcass as a lure to keep the other sharks busy until everyone was out of the water. Damn thing weighed over a tonne, and that was after the feeding frenzy.’

  ‘Spoils of urban war?’ she asked.

  ‘I guess you could say that. Team effort, but there’s only one set of keys — and Garland threatened to paint it army green. Finnigan wasn’t too happy about that, until she handed out the commendations, brownie points and next round of assignments. For them, the war’s not over.’ He turned right onto the East Coast Road and headed south for the ferry, leaving a long silence hanging in the air that warned the war wasn’t over for her either.

  ‘Hey, reach behind my seat,’ he said. ‘There’s a little friend in a pouch back there who’ll be happy to see you.’

  ‘Josie …?’ Mira reached back and found the wallaby, immediately noticing that she’d begun to grow fur, and wasn’t napping, just sucking her claw. ‘Where have you been, baby? Nasty man been hiding you? I’ve been searching all week.’ Mira kissed and cuddled the joey, and the joey responded by licking her cheek.

  ‘She comes to “Pockets” now, sorry. That other name; it wasn’t working.’

  ‘You couldn’t have dropped me a line to let me know she was safe? I’ve been worried sick!’

  ‘I thought you’d have your hands full enough with Ben.’

  ‘He won’t see me.’

  ‘Yeah? Me neither.’ He shifted gears and reversed out of the driveway.

  ‘I don’t understand,’ she said as he shifted gears again and sped off down the dirt track as if it was a highway. ‘Why would you want to see him?’

  ‘Unfinished business. I needed to know how much better he was after the ship.’

  ‘You care about him that much?’

  ‘Indirectly. Yeah, I guess you could say that.’

  ‘So you only came looking for him today?’

  He didn’t answer for a long moment, and she could tell he was watching her more than he should have been.

  ‘Watch the road,’ she warned.

  He chuckled. ‘You’ve nailed me again. How do you do that?’

  ‘I asked you a question first.’

  ‘Yeah, you did.’ He sighed, then slewed around a corner at speed, but he didn’t make it far before he braked to a halt in the middle of the road. ‘I came to see you.’

  ‘Yeah, well thanks for the joey.’

  ‘Not just that. You saved me,’ he said, as if she’d surprised him again. ‘Twice. You busted your shoulder getting me off that boat and you lied to keep me out of that tube. You lied for me.’

  ‘Fat lot of good it did us.’

  ‘That’s not the point. I know how you feel about lies — what you risk losing of yourself once you start down that track, and I just wanted … needed really, to thank you personally.’ His hand caressed her cheek, making her flinch. ‘I just needed to know how you’re doing.’

  She wished she could lie now and say she was doing fine, but he’d have to be blind not to see that she was barely holding herself together.

  ‘Movement helps … Can we go please? I don’t care where. I just need to be going somewhere.’

  ‘Sure. Is slower okay?’

  ‘Slower’s good. I’ve had my fill of the fast lane for a while.’

  ‘Back there,’ he said, ‘I thought you looked keen to get away from his place?’

  ‘Partly, but only because Ben needed me gone before he can come home to heal.’

  ‘You’re living apart now?’

  She shrugged and swallowed hard. ‘Slow light always keeps us together. Slow light means my energy lives with his now forever.’

  ‘Mine too, if you think of it that way. Did he at least have the guts to dump you to your face?’

  ‘He didn’t dump me! It’s temporary! Can we talk about something else, please?’

  ‘Love to,’ he said, with that molten chocolate voice that reminded her so much of Ben again.

  ‘How’s your shoulder?’ he asked.

  ‘Ask me again when I’m an old woman.’

  ‘I hear that. It heals well enough for now but in wet weather —’

  She stared out the window. ‘Everything aches.’

  He shifted gears on approach to a stretch of signposted roadworks and Mira gripped her seat, expecting a rough ride, which never came; just a ripple of shivers as the new four-wheel drive skimmed over the peaks of the worst ruts and corrugations.

  ‘So why did the snipers do what they did?’ she asked, still mystified by the unexpected dropping of bodies all around her on the cargo ship. ‘General Garland must have been fuming. She was so close to nabbing Colonel Kitching again, she probably would have succeeded in tracking us all the way to the people she wanted more than anything.’

  ‘I wondered about that too. At first I thought it was because Greggie gave the order to kill you or because Patterson waved for air support — and both actions did play a part. The snipers were already in place with orders to ensure your survival, but during my debriefing this week, General Garland advised me that the clincher — the main reason it went down that way — was due to a queer stroke of fate. She received a message from a new source aboard the rogue submarine — someone who’d manag
ed to smuggle a civilian phone aboard — and as you know, a civilian mobile phone is one of the easiest things in the world to track, even submerged to a certain depth.’

  ‘So why would she tell you that, if she didn’t have to?’

  ‘She expects me to tell you, I dare say; part of her final peace offering.’

  ‘Peace offering? She made Patterson’s team put us through all that for nothing! She played with our lives — and yours — and she barely cared who got hurt in the process!’

  ‘I wouldn’t go that far. She was certainly ruthless, but she’s paid to be. The face of war has changed, Mira. The battle lines are all inside our own borders, and using the oldest weapons — fear, power and commerce. At least you’re free now, and all your friends survived. Even Ben will recover eventually.’

  ‘I don’t see how — not while Greg and Gregan Greppia still draw breath in this world.’

  ‘Oh, didn’t Gabby tell you? They’re both dead.’

  ‘Dead?’ Mira shook her head. ‘I suspect Gabby’s been keeping tight-lipped about a few things, lately, trying to spare me. How did they die?’

  ‘Tarin put a knife to good use in Greggie’s back, while Gabby took care of his father — that all has to stay confidential though, sorry, or they could both end up with murder charges to answer.’

  ‘Who could I tell? Not that I believe Gabby could do such a thing anyway. She may be feisty, but she’s no killer — unless she did it in self-defence?’

  ‘More like reflex. The official story will be published in tomorrow’s papers. I can arrange an audio version if you want, or ask Detective Innes-Grady if you’d like a second take on it from him? Police reports confirmed that Gregan’s body washed ashore north of Cairns, and the autopsy reveals that he suffocated.’

  ‘No way! Gabby’s the furthest thing from a “Straddie strangler”.’

  ‘I didn’t say she strangled him. She tore off the yellow marker from Greppia’s postal package as it rolled overboard. Nobody aboard the sub could have known to open it. He must have been stacked with the other cylinders for at least three days, since that’s how long the autopsy report said he’d been dead before his body was jettisoned into the water — through a metal chute, according to the marks on his body, which all occurred post-mortem.’

  ‘I don’t believe it. He would have tapped like mad to attract attention!’

  ‘Oh, yeah, apparently he did. His fingernails were full of rubber — the same kind that lined the tube to prevent the contents from rattling.’

  Mira screwed up her face, feeling ill to imagine it. She wondered if his torch had run flat before his oxygen while trying to claw his way out, but it hardly mattered now. ‘I suppose that’s poetic justice.’

  ‘You could say the same for his son. Greggie’s fate was a lot more gruesome, though, so it’s probably best if you never know.’

  ‘You suggested before that Tarin used his back for a scabbard?’

  ‘She did, but that’s not the wound that killed him. It’s just the one that ensured it.’

  ‘Now you’re talking in circles.’ Mira frowned, remembering how Ben had pleaded for more details of the crime scenes she’d seen, and finally she knew how he felt. ‘I’ve had nightmares,’ she confessed. ‘If it involves me, I need to know everything — especially how it really ended, so I can put it all behind me. I dare say Ben needs to know how it ended for everyone else too.’

  ‘Grady’s taking care of that. A thorough debriefing is part of standard recovery therapy for trauma victims.’

  Mira closed her eyes, feeling the ache again of missing out on holding Ben’s hand through it all. ‘Then tell me, too.’

  Lockman wound down his driver’s window first, letting in a larger flow of fresh air for her. ‘He was found near the port of Brisbane — for the most part. Are you sure you want more details than that?’

  She nodded and turned her attention to the timeless sky and passing scenery — the last time she was likely to see the sandy forests of Straddie.

  ‘Greggie’s left hand was missing, along with his favourite appendage. Both severed cleanly, so it’s not hard to guess who took care of them, but he was also badly burned. The autopsy report shows that he was still alive when the trawler sank, so the salt water must have stung like a bitch. I know that much from personal experience. But it wasn’t the pain that killed him either, or the burns. I’m told he lived through the first five or six shark attacks — mostly small jaws since all the big boys and girls were busy elsewhere with us and the bigger shark carcass — until he lost too much from his legs, an arm and a large portion of his stomach. His head was also recovered from the belly of the second placegetter.’

  ‘Nice.’ Mira squirmed, feeling quite the opposite, and tried to imagine how Ben might have reacted to news as gruesome as all that. Weeks ago, she might have imagined him cheering, but Ben hadn’t turned out to be quite the person she’d expected him to be. Even so, he had to feel relief, not just for himself, but for Chloe and all the other friends he’d lost to the Greppia family.

  ‘That’s the whole branch of their cartel collapsed.’ He decelerated as he entered the small port settlement of Dunwich, and turned right, down to the pier. ‘Detective Innes-Grady obtained all the evidence he needed to clear Ben’s name from Chloe’s car, so you achieved everything you set out to achieve for Ben. Detectives Symes and Moser recovered eight hundred million from the sunken trawler, so the feds are happy — and Kitching’s gun-runners are not only that much poorer, they’ve also lost the network they’d been using to launder their dirty money. That makes them severely crippled and General Garland satisfied enough that you’ve held up your end of the deal to the best of your ability.’

  Mira shook her head in disbelief. ‘Garland wanted Kitching and Mr Mystery — and got neither, just bits of Greppia. That’s like one step forward and two back.’

  ‘She also wants the weak link in her satellite observation division now too.’ Lockman drove aboard the first ferry of the day and cut the engine. ‘But she wants you to know she’s set to do all that without you. She asked me to tell you — to reassure you, really — that she won’t be asking you for any more help, and she won’t be forcing you either.’

  ‘You’re still her messenger boy?’ Mira asked suspiciously. ‘I thought you quit?’

  ‘I did, I just —’

  ‘… found it hard to take off the uniform?’

  ‘No! It’s not that!’

  ‘Oh, really? So why are you here, exactly? To see Ben, me, or deliver her message?’

  ‘Can’t I tick more than one box?’ He sounded hurt. ‘I just had to … I can’t … Damn, you’re good at making things difficult! Call it what you want. Garland intends on finalising a peace between you and her, and I offered to play intermediary one last time. It’s that simple — almost.’

  ‘It’s the “almost” that worries me. Haven’t you people sabotaged my relationship with Ben enough yet?’

  ‘Listen, as far as I knew, you and he were back together, safe and sound. I just needed to see that for myself, in the hope I could get a little closure too. You’re in my head, Mirage, and I can’t close my eyes without seeing you.’

  ‘Don’t say that! And don’t call me that!’

  ‘It’s the way it is.’

  ‘I don’t want to hear it!’

  ‘Hey, this is hard for me too. I understand you look at me sometimes — with your heart if not with your eyes — and you see Garland’s whole army. So sure, I’d expected you to give me a hard time tearing you away from him today. But honestly, I only intended to steal you away for five minutes, and I mainly did it for your sake. Or was I wrong to think you’d prefer to get Garland’s final message through me? Because the alternative was to have her show up on your doorstep.’

  Mira sighed, knowing he was right about that much at least. She did prefer to keep him as an intermediary where Garland was concerned, but she was in no mood to admit it, especially now, if he’d quit. ‘How can yo
u be such a survivor and still tolerate being her messenger boy, when you must know by now that all her messages to me have strings attached? She might as well send poison, or drug me and drag me away and be done with it!’

  ‘And you must know by now, I’d never let that happen.’

  ‘So she expects me to swallow her message happily, just because you bring it? Is that it?’

  ‘How you feel about it is your business, but I do expect that it’ll interest you, at least.’

  ‘The only thing that interests me is the truth, and tangible things in life that can’t be whisked away at the whim of somebody else.’

  ‘Yeah, I get it. You want the sky and the sea and the land never to change, but they do change, and you, of all people, should be able to see that. What you really want is reliability, and that’s what I’m bringing to the table. I wouldn’t bother passing on anything less from her, especially if I suspected it might get you hurt — not ever!’

  ‘Oh, I don’t believe this! How hard did that hunk of metal strike your head, Corporal? I mean Lieutenant. I mean Corporal again.’ Mira laughed at him. ‘It’s a wonder she didn’t attach your rank insignia by string to a yoyo. She’s gone back on her word to you more often than she has to me in the last week.’

  ‘I was discharged as second lieutenant, actually.’

  ‘So? How does that make it permanent? She’s an expert at ripping the rug out from under people. She went back on her promise to save Ben. After all the time wasted, all the effort in arranging donor eyes to trade, she didn’t even try to get him back.’

  ‘Who told you that? One of the Greppias? They didn’t want to give him back. They had all five of their yachts at sea as decoys, making it next to impossible to keep track from archived satellite photos or surveillance — all hampered by the foul weather. Those eyes eventually went to a young blind mother in South Australia, by the way. And sure, I’ve already admitted I have my doubts about Garland. I’m not defending her. But she did give me a few things as part of her final peace offering …’

  ‘She has nothing I need!’

  ‘Not any more she doesn’t. I have them. Listen, I didn’t come here to fight with you, and I certainly wouldn’t have come here at all if I thought it might undermine what little trust might have grown between us. I just want to show you a few things, and leave it up to you if you want them or not. They’re offered in the spirit of compensation for all the trouble—’