Endgame (Book 1)

by W. A. R.

  After a moment’s hesitation, she turned on her hip, bringing her hand to his face, sliding it slowly to the back of his neck. He sighed shakily. Being there with her was everything he always thought it would be. There was comfort in the chaos and she gave him that.

  “Kiss me.” She whispered, even though her lips were but a feather light touch away from his. He thought she would never ask. Slowly, he closed the gap between them, pressing his mouth firmly against hers. She moved, angling her head slightly and exhaling softly. Her breath was warm against his cheek and he slid his hand down to her hip, instinctively pulling her closer against him. He gripped her, his fingertips pressing firmly against her flesh and he felt a hunger grow within him. Yes, he remembered how she tasted, how she had felt when she moved against him. She was responsive, alert, teasing and accepting…she was perfect and she was his. She parted her mouth and pressed her hand against his neck. His tongue entered her mouth and they melded together in the darkness of the room. She shifted her hips against him, mewling a little in the back of her throat, and he felt himself grow hard in response to her. He quickly tore his mouth from hers and pushed her back a little, his face flushed.

  “What’s wrong?” she asked, surprised and confused. Her face was written with want, determination, and a hunger…a hunger for him. He swallowed thickly and pulled his fingers from the soft skin of her midriff where his fingers rested as if she burned him. He was scared of touching her then, scared he may do exactly what he yearned to do.

  “Nothing’s wrong. Just…uh…things were getting…heated.” He explained and she laughed at his response. Oh God. His heart hammered against his ribcage, his breathing becoming shallow and uneven. Every thought he had of her, every time he ever wanted to just…take her and show her everything she meant to him...they all came flooding back at once and it was overwhelming. He began trembling in resistance.

  “Miles…please…come back to me...” She expressed lightly on a smile. No, she couldn’t be serious. What door had they opened? Why in the hell was he freaking out? Because he was afraid; he was afraid if it reached that point he would fail her and he couldn’t do that to her. He wouldn’t.

  “Amber, you don’t know what you’re asking…” he began, his words not very convincing to even his own ears. He gulped at her next words.

  “I know exactly what I’m saying.” She told him firmly and he had to move away from her, at least a little. Fire was steadily rising, his blood boiling and the closer he was to her, the hotter he became. He tried to get his mind to stop, to remove the very temptation of her and he couldn’t. “I’m telling you that I want you to touch me…to kiss me. I don’t care where it leads. I just want to be with you.” Her voice was husky and thick and very quickly he stood, attempting to steady his trembling hands. He ran a hand through his hair. Her words were what he had longed to hear, and yet...the moans from Biters outside reached his ears. This wasn’t how he had always envisioned it. She sat up, gazing up at him curiously.

  “As much as I want to…have wanted to…make love to you…since…since fucking puberty…I…I don’t think we should…” he stammered in response to her. His cheeks flamed with embarrassment. He just rejected her…just turned down the woman of his dreams. She stood as well, and he watched her ease onto her feet gracefully. A small smile played on her lips and he couldn’t move, couldn’t take his eyes off of her. He was insanely nervous, and he kept asking himself why he was, even when he knew the answer. It was something that he had deemed impossible, never going to happen, and yet here she was standing before him with anxiousness and the same apprehension he had. Could he risk ruining how far they had come by crossing that line? He couldn’t touch her; he understood that once he did, he wouldn’t be able to stop now that the door was open. What in the hell was wrong with him? He was a grown man who had had a son for crying out loud. And yet, as they stared at one another in the silence, he knew that she wasn’t like any other woman. He had known that all along.

  “Since puberty?” she asked, smiling in spite of herself. There rest of the world didn’t matter then, their problems vanished, and all they could focus on was one another. It was how it always was with her.

  He swallowed. “You have no idea.” He told her gruffly before clearing his throat. His hands were shaking…he wanted to touch her so badly, and yet he didn’t. She began to reach for him and he took a step back, knowing that one simple touch was all that it would take and there would be no turning back. He saw a flash of pain and regret cross her face.

  “I never asked you to…make love to me. I just want you to hold me.” She told him, her tone slightly more serious and less teasing. His eyes were wide and intense. He could feel the flames of desire flow through him. ‘…make love to me.’ Her words, while taken out of context, reverberated throughout his entire being. He cleared his throat nervously, taking yet another step back from her. She furrowed her eyebrows at him, as if hurt. “What’s wrong with you?” she asked and he simply stared at her and her beautiful profile in the dark. For the first time in a long time he was speechless; words could not describe the emotions that warred within him.

  “Nothing.” He finally said, his voice bland and unsure.

  “Oh…alright then. I’m sorry.” She said softly, walking past him, giving him a wide berth so as not to touch him; although it almost seemed like avoidance. Before she reached the door, he turned to face her. He felt the beginnings of a panic setting in and he forced himself to remain calm.

  “Where are you going?” he asked her and she paused with her hand on the door lock. She never looked at him, only at her hand. After a moment of silence, his nerves grew even more taut. “Amber?”

  “This is awkward. I think…” she trailed off, turning to look at him sadly. “I think I am going to go sit on the porch and think. I’m not going to be able to sleep.” His mind went into overdrive as he thought of her alone in the dark.

  A sudden fury blindsided him, and the fire blazed in his gut at the thoughts that forced their way into his troubled mind. “Is Buddy still awake?” he asked through clenched teeth. He swore that one day he would end up destroying that man. Amber looked at him angrily, and he felt a sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach. She removed her hand from the door knob and advanced towards him. He took a step back before she stopped, unsure of what she intended to say or do. He wasn’t even sure of what he had said or done.

  “Why does that matter?” she asked him and he avoided the look in her eyes. It was a good question, he reasoned; one he wasn’t sure how to answer without upsetting her more. Could he really ruin this night any more than he already had?

  “I don’t like you being alone with him.” He admitted ruefully, “I don’t trust him.”

  She hesitated for only a moment before speaking. “I’ve been alone with him for the better part of the night and I’m still alive and well.” She reminded him and it was like a slap in the face. He bit back any retort he was going to throw at her and conceded to her. She shrugged. “And as far as trusting him…well, I do. I trust him with my life. He is a good person, regardless of his feelings or his past and I expect you to respect that about him.” She admitted to him. Regret washed over him. How could he have let things become so misconstrued? Everything had been so damned good and now…what had he done? After a moment of silence, he felt like he knew what she was thinking; he could almost hear the gears in her head turning. It brought a dull ache to the very core of him.

  “I’m sorry…just…don’t go like this.”

  “Like what?” she asked him and he sighed.

  “Angry.” He replied, and she turned to face him face to face, stepping a little closer.

  “Miles, I’m not angry, I just don’t understand what happened.” Just when he thought he couldn’t love her anymore, she renders him silent with her words, the sensitive and caring look on her face. She was trying to understand his actions, and he wasn’t helping aide in that understanding. She deserved so much better than him.
>
  “I can’t hold you, Amber.” He admitted to her roughly, his muscles tightening at his confession. She crossed her arms and pursed her lips, glancing off at the side for a moment before turning her intense blue eyes back to him. She was hurt, he saw and he shook his head.

  Her eyes were saddened and he knew she misunderstood his words. It only spurred to drive him crazier with need. “Is there a specific reason why not?”

  Miles felt everything inside of him ignite at her words; he would show her why he couldn’t just hold her. Before he realized what he was doing he reached forward and grabbed her elbow, jerking her to him. She was shocked and confused. He didn’t care. He turned towards the wall, grabbing her other arm, need overwhelming him.

  “Miles, what are you…” she began protesting and attempting to remove herself from his grasp, but he pressed her against the wall roughly, pinning her arms against the wall beside her and brought his mouth down to hers. He pressed his body against hers, knowing she couldn’t escape him. He had her trapped between his body and the wall. Deepening the kiss, she melted against him and he suckled at her bottom lip before biting it slightly, causing her to gasp. His mouth never left hers, but he let his hands leave her arms, beginning to slide down her torso to her hips. He drank in her kisses like a man dying of thirst. She was his oasis.

  He finally tore his mouth from hers. “Because I want you…I need you.” He then moved his mouth to her neck, pulling the sensitive skin between his teeth. She jerked against him, giving him a sharp moan in response as she twisted her fingers in his hair. His breathing was ragged and shallow. Damn, did she feel good against him, moving with him. He groaned and his breath was warm against her cool skin. Desperation licked at his mind, and he couldn’t get enough. He was fire and he was burning so white hot that it was unbearable. He wanted to feel her skin against his.

  “I need more.” His voice rumbled against her ear before he pulled back. His hands trailed under the hem of her shirt before he hurriedly pulled it over her head. She readily obliged before he removed his own, both of them gasping for air. Her eyes were heated, her skin flushed and he pulled her from the wall, lowering her to the floor. Every thought left his mind except everything he wanted to do to her. She didn’t ask questions, and was no longer angry; instead she was lost in the field of desire, as was he. He was going to leave his mark on her again and again, and the idea of it spurred him on as he sat back on his knees, unbuttoning her jeans and sliding the zipper down.

  “Miles…” she vaguely called out in a husky whisper and he hoped she didn’t protest because he wasn’t sure he could stop. He leaned forward and crushed his mouth to hers, nibbling at her bottom lip.

  “I can take you to heaven if you’ll let me.” He begged of her breathlessly between kisses and she moaned in response. His hands roamed over her and he was like a blind man, and she was the map. He learned about her through every move, every touch. “Just forget our worries…forget the monster…just for tonight.”

  “Yes.” She whispered against his mouth. It was his undoing, her permission. He leaned back, pulling her denim jeans from her body, and he paused after tossing them to the side, admiring the view of the woman he had before him. Her heated blue eyes questioned him, her chest heaving and her breasts moving with the action. Her skin was flushed and an ornate tattoo similar to climbing roses and thorns crawled up her side from her right hip to her chest. Just a few more pieces of clothing and she would be completely vulnerable to him, he thought. He smiled down at her as he pushed her knees apart easily, filling the empty space with his own body. She anticipated him, his touch and she tensed in appreciation. His hands slid across her thighs and she shuddered, shifting slightly and wanting more. He gripped her hips and jerked her forward to him, and again she gasped. He loved the sounds she made as she writhed beneath him.

  “You are so damn beautiful.” he told her, his voice almost a primal growl as he leaned forward, her legs wrapping around his waist and urging him closer. He reached around her back, lifting her slightly and unfastening her bra. She quickly pulled it from her body and threw it to the side before her hands found their way to his back, her fingers pressing into the taut muscles. He then steadied himself over her by placing his palms on either side of her, trailing kisses from her neck, to her collarbone, and between her breasts. She was exquisite, a masterpiece, his masterpiece. He drank her in; the smell of her, the feel of her, the taste of her skin. He couldn’t get enough and whenever she responded so vividly to his every move, his every touch, he shuddered, overwhelmed with the pleasure. His erection pressed against the zipper of his jeans and she moved her hips against him. A low growl escaped his throat; he was so hard it hurt. The feel of her bare skin against his was unreal, and he couldn’t get close enough to her. He took a nipple into his mouth, lightly teasing it with his teeth while bringing a hand to cup the other breast, his fingers teasing the hard point of her nipple. She bucked against him, whimpering in response to his touch. Her body was writhing beneath him and he could feel her heat through the denim of his jeans. Their bodies were becoming slick with sweat and he brought his mouth back to hers, the kisses heated and needy. His fingers gripped at her, and he knew she would have bruises from this desire in the morning. He didn’t care. It was them, their mark. He knew he was the only one that would ever see them.

  “Touch me…” she begged of him and he took his mouth to her neck, his fingers trailing down her body. He slid his fingers underneath the cotton fabric of her panties, reaching down to her core. His fingers slid against her and she arched her back, pressing her chest against him, and thrusting her hips toward him. He muttered an obscenity against her hair; she was so damn wet.

  Quickly he removed himself from her and stood, removing his jeans and boxers, her eyes intent on him before he got back down to her. He slipped his fingers under the fabric of her cotton underwear and pulled them towards him and off of her legs. He tossed them precariously into the darkness of the room. He hovered over her, his erection pressing against her hot, slick entrance. He gazed down at her and she reached up, placing her hand on his neck. She was trembling with need, but her eyes were filled with curiosity.

  “I need to be inside of you…” he ground out between clenched teeth and she wiggled her hips against his, wrapping her legs tighter around him. He held steadfastly against her actions, closing his eyes with the amount of restraint he had to exhibit.

  “Miles, please…” she pleaded with him, her hands gripping at his neck, his back. A noise rumbled from his chest and he gazed down at her.

  “I know…I just…I just need you to know, before we do this…” he paused, unsure of how to phrase what he wanted to say.

  “What is it?” she asked softly, releasing her hold on him, her fingers sliding across his skin. Her hips swiveled against him once more, her moist heat beckoning him. She needed to understand what she meant to him though. He had to make her understand. He stared deep into her eyes and lowered his head to grace her with a brush of his lips.

  “I have never loved anyone more than I do you. Do you understand me?” he demanded of her, and she widened her eyes at him. He was so serious, so full of intensity and sincerity she felt tears sting the back of her eyes.

  “Yes.” She whispered and before she had a chance to react, he slid into her. She grasped at his back, her legs tightening their hold on him. He groaned loudly, stilling as she gasped in shock and bit her lip. Her body tightened against him, adjusting to his size. Very slowly, he lowered his mouth to her neck, his teeth nipping at her sensitized skin and she pressed her mouth against his shoulder to muffle a moan.

  “You feel so damn good.” He told her before pulling back, and so very slowly he entered her once more. She threw her head back, arching her back into him and he couldn’t hide the smile that graced his lips. He began thrusting into her, pumping his hips to reach deeper, and her hips met his every thrust. Her fingernails dug into his skin, and he clenched his teeth, riding the fine line where pain
becomes pleasure. His hands skirted across her body, teasing her nipples, urging her towards climax. His hips moved faster, and her body writhed beneath him, her muscles taut. She bit her lip, trying desperately to keep silent in a houseful of people. She whimpered against her will and he knew then that he wanted to make her scream; he wanted to know every facet of her and what he did to her as he ravaged her body and claimed it as his.

  “Oh God…” She moaned, pulling him closer and he pressed every inch of his body against hers, their hips grinding against one another. “Don’t stop…” she begged of him. He felt her muscles tighten around his erection, and he continued to thrust, refusing to reach his release before her.

  “I want to feel you lose yourself in me…” he whispered huskily against her ear, kissing her thoroughly, and then he eased back from her. “Look at me. I want to watch you come undone.” He demanded and she turned her eyes to him, her legs tightening around his waist as he placed his hands between them, rubbing his thumb against her most sensitive place. That did it. She began convulsing around him, tightening around him and spreading her warmth. She gasped, moaning his name and he felt himself closing in. He continued thrusting and she shuddered beneath him until he moaned, thrusting harder into her. Her name left his lips as he emptied himself inside of her.

  “Oh my God…” she whispered breathlessly after a moment against his chest as he lowered himself on her. Her voice was thick with emotion and she wrapped her arms around him. He was reluctant to leave her. “That was amazing.”

  He chuckled, resting his elbows on either side of her and staring down into her flushed cheeks. “You’re telling me. You have no idea how long I have fantasized about that.” She laughed lowly, her breath warm against his skin. He sighed, feeling content and…complete. He had never felt so at peace. They lay like this for a few minutes, satisfied in their silence, reveling in their ecstasy. He felt the primal pride settle within him at having this woman, his woman, lose control because of him.