Mantis

by India Millar

  The room was not warm, but by the time I was certain I had unknotted the nerves in his neck, I was sweating from the exertion. I sat back and flexed my fingers.

  “That’s better,” I said. It was a statement, not a question. Adam stretched, his body quivering.

  “The pain’s gone completely. How can I ever thank you, Kamakiri?”

  I was about to tell him simply to pay me my fee when he rolled over. Just as before, his tree of flesh stood out rigid from his body. Perhaps my victory over the thugs who had tried to rob me, together with the knowledge that I had more skill than his gaijin doctor, made me overconfident. Whatever it was, this time I did not avert my—supposedly unseeing—eyes from his rearing tree. Instead, I looked at it with interest, wondering with all the curiosity of a true anma how he managed to support the organ without fainting from lack of blood to the rest of his body. Clearly, Adam did not realize that I could see his tree only too well. He touched it, making the bald head bob, and sighed regretfully.

  My heartbeat surged as I recognized that my chance had arrived. I spoke quickly.

  “Is there anything else I can do for you, Adam?” I asked casually.

  Adam took his hand away from his tree abruptly and then returned it as if he had been drawn to his own flesh against his will.

  “I’m sure there is, Kamakiri.” He paused, and I guessed he was trying to find a polite way of asking for what he obviously wanted. “I don’t mean any offense, but I have heard that anma are very skilled in areas other than healing.”

  “Is that so? Are you sure you’re not confusing me with a geisha, Adam?” I was still stinging from his compliment to the geisha who had been paid—and no doubt very well indeed—to make this gaijin feel like a god.

  “I could never do that. None of the geisha I’ve seen were as beautiful as you are, Kamakiri. None of them could ever be as caring as you. And even though they did not have the burden of blindness, none of them moved with the grace that you possess.” He spoke in a gush of words; I felt great pleasure as I realized he meant it.

  I smiled and shook my head modestly. “You are very kind, Adam-san.” At least I could acknowledge his generous words. “But alas, I’m nothing but an anma, doing the best I can. Now, if there is nothing else you need, I shall go.”

  I had become impatient, both with Adam and myself. He could pay me, and I would be on my way.

  “Well, there is something. But I hardly know how to ask…”

  I waited, holding my breath. When Adam remained silent, I spoke myself.

  “You are suffering somewhere else?” I asked.

  “No. I mean yes.” He sounded miserable. I sighed, barely able to hide my impatience. We would be all day at this rate.

  “It is often the case that a very deep massage is stimulating,” I said seriously. I ran my hand down his chest and pretended amazement when I found his tree of flesh. “Ah, I see. It may not be so in your country, Adam, but here in Japan, it is considered a very bad thing for a man whose tree is deeply aroused to go unsatisfied. It is believed that if a man is so aroused and does not find satisfaction, then his seed will go bad and cause his bodily organs to putrefy. Perhaps I may be able to help you avoid such a terrible fate?”

  I had wrapped my hand around his tree as I spoke. It was so engorged that my fingers did not meet at all. I didn’t bother to wait for his answer, but instead began to massage his flesh gently. I was apprehensive about his lack of a hood. No doubt a gaijin woman would know what to do to stimulate him. I had no idea if what aroused Yo would interest him in the least.

  Adam made a sound deep in his throat as if I was hurting him. I stopped at once, and he wrapped his own hand around mine, gripping it tightly. I was reassured and continued my gentle up and down movement. When he thrust out his belly toward me, I tightened my grip and began to move quickly, and then quicker still.

  He burst his fruit unexpectedly, with a roar of pleasure that made me flinch with surprise. His seed jetted so copiously that I found I was aroused myself, and I almost wished his seed had not been wasted on the unfeeling tatami. I slowed my rhythm, relieved that his eyes were closed so he couldn’t see my astonishment. Finally, I took my hand away completely and Adam slumped back on to the tatami. He was breathing very deeply, and appeared to be on the verge of sleep.

  It seemed to me then that gaijin men were not so very different from Japanese. Perhaps men the world over enjoyed kenjataimu—the short period of release from all tension that comes after orgasm. I hoped so.

  I stood up silently and moved very quickly. I would have to assume I had only a few moments to find what I was looking for before Adam came to his senses. I guessed what I wanted would be kept somewhere secure. Adam must have a woman to clean for him and cook his meals. Naturally, she would be curious about anything that looked in the least odd and would probably want to look at, and even taste, anything unusual. Adam would want to conceal anything that might interest her. There was a chest against the wall. I lifted the top and glanced inside. Robes, folded carefully. Several obi. Some documents, covered in strange symbols. I was about to lower the lid when the light glinted on something in the corner. I snatched the small, glass bottle up and slid it in my obi. The contents rattled and I stiffened, afraid Adam might have heard. It might not be what I was looking for, but I had to take the chance.

  By the time Adam sat up, I was kneeling on the tatami at his side, my eyes lowered and my expression suitably anxious.

  Thirteen

  When my fingers form

  Words on paper, how do they

  Know what my mind wants?

  Adam was deeply embarrassed. I felt his discomfort; it surprised me. Reiki had warned me that many of her customers believed that a “happy ending” must be included in the price of their massage. I had raised my eyebrows in surprise, and then felt absurdly guilty when she appeared to read my thoughts.

  “It doesn’t matter to them that more often than not I’m old enough to be their mother, or even their grandmother,” she said crisply. “Anma have a reputation for being skilled in all the sensory arts. With some of them, you would have to cut their tree off at the root to dim their enthusiasm for a more intimate sort of massage.”

  “Do you oblige?” I asked.

  She shrugged. “Depends on my mood. If I fancy the feel of them.” That made my jaw drop! “I might give them a little extra. Otherwise, I make sure I get my money and then get well away before they can get their clothes on.”

  I was grateful for the warning, but I was surprised that Adam was ashamed of his perfectly natural reaction to my skilled hands. He fumbled in his purse and handed me a gold ichibuban coin. I pretended to weigh it in my palm before I protested.

  “This is far too much, Adam-san.” I held my hand out to him, inviting him to take the coin back. Instead, he wrapped my fingers over my palm, enclosing the coin.

  “It is very little for the pleasure you have given, Kamakiri.” He was actually blushing. How very odd these gaijin were! “May I make an appointment for you to come and see me again?”

  “I’m sorry. I will be away from the Floating World for some time, and I don’t know when I will be back.” The lie came fluidly, and I was sorry. I was beginning to become quite fond of my polite gaijin; good enough reason in itself to keep away from him.

  “I will look out for you.”

  I heard the disappointment in Adam’s voice and bowed politely as I left.

  Even though it was only mid-morning, the streets of the Floating World were seething with people. I marveled anew that this city within a city never seemed to sleep and was always restless, always searching for pleasure. I tapped my way forward, using my staff to feel my way. It was already comfortable in my hand.

  My thoughts lingered with Adam. He had seemed genuinely unhappy that he could not make another appointment with me. Would he feel the same, I wondered, when he found his bottle was missing? Or would he perhaps blame the woman who cared for his house for stealing it? I guess
ed he would know it was me who had taken it, and I hoped he would think it was merely curiosity on my part.

  My train of thought was broken abruptly. Someone was screaming. A high pitched, breathy wail. A young girl, by the sound of her voice. I paused, turning as I tried to locate the source. Men jostled past me as I stood. One of them cursed me for not moving. Another simply shoved me to one side. Two geisha tottered past on high geta. Neither of them spared me a glance. Not a single person appeared to even notice the screams.

  The noise stopped abruptly. I was about to go on my way when the screams were replaced by sobs. I decided that the sound was coming from a house a little further down the street. I tap-tap-tapped my way down toward the noise. Another man barged into me so roughly that I guessed he had done it deliberately.

  “Get out of my way, anma. Who do you think you are, taking up the whole street?”

  “I am so sorry, master.” I cringed, hunching my shoulders and bobbing my head. He grinned, clearly pleased with himself, and as I turned to move away, I jabbed my staff viciously against his shins. The man howled and hopped from foot to foot.

  “You bitch!” he snarled. “You did that on purpose!”

  “Master?” I stared over his shoulder. “Did what? I am so sorry. Did I catch you with my staff? Surely I could not have hurt you with a little tap!”

  A crowd had gathered to watch the entertainment. One of the women called cheerfully at my assailant.

  “Oh! Did the poor anma hurt the big, strong man?”

  The crowd howled with laughter and the man I had hit was suddenly less brave.

  “I realize you meant nothing by it, anma.” He straightened up with visible effort. I had chosen to hit him precisely at the point in front of his shin that would cause the most pain. I bit my lip anxiously, tapping toward him with my staff as if I was searching for his legs. He hopped away from me quickly.

  “If I have caused you pain, master, then I must heal it for you,” I whined. I reached out as if to pat him and my wandering fingers jabbed him in the eye. The crowd erupted into more laughter.

  “No, I’m fine. Forget it.”

  The man turned away and melted into the circle of people. They dispersed quickly, realizing the fun was over.

  I had almost forgotten my quest, but I was reminded instantly when I heard the sobs again. They were much quieter now, and I had to listen carefully to distinguish them above the row of the street. A noodle seller shouting his wares close to me obscured the sound I was listening for and I frowned in annoyance. He glared at me and moved away in search of more likely customers.

  There. I had it. Not this house, nor the next. I walked forward deliberately and then paused to listen. Men’s voices, loud, and I guessed the worse for drink. But that was all I could hear. Still, I was sure that this was the right place.

  I was torn with indecision. I needed to get away from here as quickly as possible. There was a chance that Adam would look into his chest for something and find I had taken his bottle. If he did that, he would surely come searching for me. But the voice I had heard from this house had been very young and deeply distressed. I was torn. The voice was silent. I decided quickly that it was probably only a child being smacked for some small thing by its mother and none of my business.

  “Please, let me go.” The child’s voice. Her plea called to my heart and I turned immediately, knocking politely on the wooden lattice of the shoji with my staff. After a pause, a man’s voice called out angrily.

  “Who is it?”

  “Sir, is this the house of Tanaka-san? He is expecting me.”

  “No. Go away.”

  “Oh, sir. I am so sorry to disturb you.” I spoke humbly. “I was sure that this was where I was told to come. Tanaka-san sent for me especially to give him a massage. Do you know where he lives?”

  I heard the mumble of voices behind the door and then a loud, lewd laugh. The shoji slid back far enough to show a young man’s face.

  “You’re an anma, are you?” he asked.

  “Yes, sir. Please, do you know where I can find Tanaka-san? He will be furious if I don’t find him.”

  “Come in, anma.” The shoji opened wide. I stared blindly at the man. He was grinning widely. “Tanaka-san isn’t here, but perhaps one of my friends can direct you.”

  “Thank you,” I said politely. The room stank of sake. Beneath that was a different odor, the raw smell of animals in rut. I paused, staring around apparently aimlessly, flickering my eyelids and allowing my gaze to wander without direction.

  The girl was sitting in the corner. She was naked. Her thin arms were looped around her knees as if she was hugging herself. There was a red mark across one of her cheeks, I guessed where somebody had used their knuckles to strike her. Her eyes were wide and bright, as if she was holding back tears. I felt a surge of tenderness for this unknown child who had refused to cry.

  “Anma, are you?” Four men crowded the small room. The eldest pushed his face close to mine as he spoke. I steeled myself not to flinch from his sake and pipe breath.

  “Yes, sir,” I said politely.

  “Young for an anma, aren’t you?” He was grinning at me. At the same time, he raised his fist and shook it in front of my face. When I didn’t respond, he unwound his fingers far enough to make an obscene rubbing gesture. The other men laughed.

  “I may be young, sir,” I smiled, lowering my head. “But I am very good at my art. Nobody in the Floating World can give a better massage than me.”

  “Is that so?” The first man had joined his companion. They looked at each other and exchanged grins. “Well, I daresay we might enjoy a bit of pampering to get us in the mood before we get down to things with her.” He nodded at the girl huddled in the corner. She stared straight back at him, her mouth tight.

  “I thought I heard a child screaming,” I said. “Does the poor thing have pain? Is it something I can help with?”

  The girl sighed loudly and I moved toward the sound. Instantly the oldest man put his hand out, stopping me.

  “Forget about her, anma. It’s we who need your services.”

  “I’m so sorry, sir,” I said. “I must find my way to Tanaka-san. He’s expecting me and will be very angry if I’m late.”

  I turned. As I expected, the nearest man put his hand on my shoulder to stop me. I paused, feigning surprise.

  “Oh, come on,” the man coaxed. “I don’t know how much Tanaka is going to pay you, but there are four of us. We can make it well worth your while to stay.”

  The two men who hadn’t spoken looked at each other and then hunched over, shaking with amusement, their hands smothering laughter. I smiled sweetly, forcing my fury to be tame. For the moment. All the men were grinning widely, nodding at each other and laughing at the foolish, blind anma who had walked in just in time to enhance their fun. I had no doubt that they all thought themselves deeply iki; all men of the world that no woman could resist.

  “Wonder what she looks like underneath that dirty, old robe, Choki,” one of the men called loudly. I stiffened. Choki. What felt like a lifetime ago, one of my brother’s friends had tried to rape me. He had been staying at our house as a guest of my brother. He had also been called Choki. I felt the shadow of karma fall upon me and I bared my teeth in what the men could take as a nervous smile if they were stupid enough.

  “Nothing special, sir, I assure you.” I cowered, miming fear.

  “All women are special in their own way.” Choki grinned. “Come on, let’s have a look before we buy.”

  He grabbed for the knot on my obi. I let him concentrate firmly on it before putting my hand over his fingers quite gently. I didn’t want to frighten him off. Not yet, at least.

  “Would the gentlemen like a massage?” I asked.

  Choki glanced at his companions and raised his eyebrows. “Part of me would,” he said. He took his hand off my obi and grabbed for my hand, placing it firmly against his robe. His tree was erect, and I gasped in mock awe. Compared to Adam�
��s stallion of a tree, it was nothing. I bit back the temptation to ask if this was the best he could do.

  “Oh, sir,” I gasped. “Surely you couldn’t expect a poor anma to take a river monster like that?”

  The atmosphere grew suddenly ugly. I heard the other men draw in their breath sharply. I risked a sideways glance at the child, mentally telling her to keep out of the way. She stared at me as if she knew I could see her, and for a moment, I was worried that the men might have noticed. I relaxed as I realized they were all so deep in lust that it would take an earthquake to distract them.

  “Oh, but I do.” Choki leered. “I’ll go first, and then you can see to my friends here. And when we’ve finished with you, you can use your other skills to restore us to full potency so we can finish what we were about to start with her.”

  Fourteen

  Green grass makes no noise

  Even in the wind. Sere stalks

  Whisper on a breeze

  I learned a valuable lesson at that moment. I knew the men were drunk. Because of that, I had assumed that they would be slow and clumsy and easy to deal with. I was wrong.

  Choki kept me distracted. He was leering at me, so close I could feel his breath on my face. He pushed his hand into my robe, clutching for my breast. I took a step back so I could take a good swing at him with my staff—the padded end could deal a blow hard enough to leave any man reeling—and found that one of the other men had moved right behind me while I was fully occupied with Choki. I was angry with myself, but recovered my wits quickly.

  The man behind me tried to wrap his arms around me. I sidestepped him easily, but the room was small and I had little space to maneuver. My staff dealt Choki a brisk blow to his ribs and he bent double, in so much pain he couldn’t even speak. One of the other men laughed loudly.