Goodbye, Good Girl

by Renee Blossom

  She texted him: call me, we need to talk i hope you are okay

  Kandace stood and walked as though on eggshells, pausing at the full-length bedroom mirror. She dropped the blanket and twisted, studied herself. Who was this young woman? Autumn or Kandace? Her soreness still lingered, but felt manageable, like a bad cramp that was past its worst but still making you feel it. She drank a water bottle on the bedside table and felt much better, the cool liquid refreshing her throat.

  Her bedroom door swung open, and April walked in. “Are you feeling better?”

  She wore ripped jeans and a strapless top, cropped short at an angle. For an instant, Kandace thought April should be a model.

  Kandace eased a little. “I forgot you were here.”

  “Yeah, and that’s not all you forgot,” April said, pointing at Kandace up and down. “No need to get dressed, right!” April disappeared down a hallway from the bedroom, emerging with a white bathrobe.

  “I don’t have any clothes, remember?” Kandace said. “Unless you caught my boyfriend and got my luggage.”

  “Nah,” April said, sliding the robe over Kandace. “You’ve got way better stuff one room over.”

  Kandace rubbed soft terrycloth to her skin, amazed at how soft it was. “Huh? I have clothes?”

  “Yep. Stacked in the living area. You were totally hooked up.”

  “Where am I?”

  “The Four Seasons. Like, maybe a mile from the club.”

  “You’re serious?”

  “Yeah. Have a look around. This place is amazing.”

  “So, how did I get here?”

  “You passed out at the club so instead of having you sleep on my apartment floor while my roommate’s boyfriend—that I can’t get off my fucking couch—has fantasies about you while you sleep, the club gave you this room. Lucky you.”

  Kandace managed a little laugh. “For how long?”

  April shrugged. “At least one more night.”

  “The club does this for dancers?”

  “Haha. The club books a hotel for star dancers like the divas they are.”

  “Yeah, but that’s not me.”

  April waved her hand at Kandace. “Stop that. You’re a star now. Or haven’t you heard?”

  “A star? C’mon. That was one night.”

  “Oh, it’s for real. Check it out,” April said, holding out her phone with a video playing. The caption read: NEW BEAUTY AT THE PALACE, AUTUMN. The clip ran for thirty seconds, with close up shots of Kandace’s face and body parts in quick frames, followed by a gravity-defying spin on the pole, finished with a caption: “Fantasies come true at The Palace.”

  “Uh… the fuck is that? Tell me that’s not online.” Kandace held April’s phone as though she might try to snap it in half.

  April rescued her device. “Relax. It’s promo stuff. It’s on Twitter and the club website.”

  “Shit.”

  “Before you get pissed, you should see the comments. You’ll go crazy.”

  “Wait… hang on. I can’t be on Twitter as a stripper! Or anywhere on the Internet for that matter!”

  “Yeah, easy. They don’t use your real name. No one from Philly is gonna find you as Autumn on the chance you’re suddenly an exotic dancer in St. Louis.”

  “I’m from Pittsburgh and I’m fine with my choice to dance, but I’ve no clue how I can possibly admit all this to my family or friends. And discovering me online spells disaster.”

  “No one is gonna find that video and think that’s you.”

  If Markus does, I’m dead.

  “I’m still pissed. We had a deal, right? One night.”

  April stared at Kandace a beat. “The club does a promo for every dancer because it draws the crowds in. Why do you think you’re in the Four Seasons? Teddy is going nuts right now over you.” April gesticulated as though she were showing the hotel room to a potential buyer. “Now, c’mon. I can’t wait any longer on your clothes.”

  No going back now.

  “I’ve learned to love naked. The Brazilian changed me.”

  “Told ya. Revolution!”

  Kandace followed April to a spacious living room with tall windows, open blinds, bright sunlight and a clear, unobstructed city view. The Arch. The River. The furnishings were museum quality.

  “Dang. This is wild,” she said.

  “Beautiful, huh? I love this hotel. C’mon, girl. Try on clothes.”

  “Aren’t they my clothes?”

  “Yeah, but I’m nosy and competitive, and I want to see what you got!” Boutique clothing bags with frilly paper and tags were set on a marble table.

  Kandace studied the bags a moment, peeking inside. “How could all this be for me?”

  “The club takes care of its stars.”

  “I don’t think so… I need to collect my pay and buy a flight to LA.”

  “Really? Just take off? New clothes, mad cash, sweet hotel room. Why rush?”

  “My dad,” Kandace said, looking out the window at the city below. “It’s complicated.”

  “Family troubles are rough. But I’m betting you need money. Just like me,” April said.

  Kandace paused a moment, studying April. “How do I get paid?”

  April snickered. “Just go early, and Teddy will take care of you.”

  So I have to go back to the club no matter what.

  Even the bags looked expensive, with detailed lettering, fine materials. She removed meticulously paper-wrapped clothing, a silk band holding the fine paper and folded fashion. “I’ve never owned clothes like this. So, did you lose the bet?”

  “Never. You made a killing on a good night. Now try on clothes.”

  “How much?”

  “I don’t know exactly.”

  “But it was more than one thousand?”

  “It was more than five thousand. Now, try something on, dammit.”

  Kandace sat agape, watching April crack up. “You’re making it up.”

  April shook her head. “Nada.”

  Kandace screamed and jumped up and down, arms flailing. When she’d finished, heart still racing, her limbs hurt but she didn’t care. She sat on the sofa and eyed the bags, feeling like the world was hers to own.

  April sat, bemused. “And the clothes are a bonus. Club bought them. It’s all you. Teddy has favors with the boutiques around town.”

  Kandace turned on the sofa toward April. “Okay, how much was it really? How much did I make? Or are you not even supposed to know that?”

  April flicked at her hair. “I don’t joke about a girl’s money. You got the members-only room. You had like two grand guaranteed on some three hours in there. You’re tipping out big time, so the staff love you.”

  Kandace groaned. “No. Hold on. I have to pay people? I owe money now?”

  “Nope. Club handles it all. What Teddy pays you is all yours. They take out house fees, tips, glamour, and extras.”

  “Good. Because I’d have no idea what to do. How did I get myself into this?”

  “You’re in good hands, Kandace. Are you gonna try something on or do I have to beg?”

  “I feel disgusting. Which way is the bathroom?”

  April smirked and acted like a concierge. “Oh yes, madam. It’s to your left through the double doors. Would you like an escort? Moist towel for your vagina?”

  Kandace stood and her eyes widened at April. “That sounds so wrong.”

  “You’ve got a diamond between your legs, girl! I can’t get enough of you, seeing this place now… I think I’m in love with you. I’ve never thought seriously about doing porn until I met you.”

  “Whatever drugs you’re taking, you should stop,” Kandace said, walking to the bathroom.

  April shouted across the suite. “Hey, I heard you got Hideki.”

  “Who told you that?” Kandace asked, peering out the bathroom, toothbrush in her mouth.

  “Chill. We aren’t phoning his wives.” She laughed and held up one of Kandace’s new panties, price t
ag hanging from it. “Go shower! You’re modeling this gorgeous sparkling thong for me when you get out.”

  “Why are my panties on your head? You’re sick.”

  “I’m sorry! I’m lonely! Hurry up!”

  The hotel’s bath soaps smelled lovely and lathered well. Kandace scrubbed liberally. The shower head’s pulsing massaged her shoulders and back—and the removable head meant she could massage her calves and inner thighs. Kandace treated herself to a robe and brushed her hair at the mirror. April wandered in as she picked up her phone from the counter.

  “You and your phone got a thing going I should be jealous of? I know it vibrates, but shit, it’s not enough.”

  “Hang on. My sister texted me.”

  Coral’s text: Please call back. Tell us you are safe.

  Kandace felt horribly guilty, typing a group text to Coral, Vivian, and Ginger: I’m okay. In St. Louis. Made friends. Doing good.

  Send.

  “Okay, well, food’s here,” April said, walking out. At the dining room table, eight breakfast entrees were on display. The cream cheese stuffed French toast, brandied eggs, and maple bacon looked amazing. Fruit crepes, powdered sugar, whipped cream, and was that a brandy sauce?

  “This is one sweet dream,” Kandace said. “I mean, who gets all this?”

  April held up her phone, its case covered in costume diamonds, and took Kandace’s picture with three entrees in the frame, wearing a bathrobe, wet hair adorning her face.

  She thought of her father again, and part of her wanted just to drop everything and go. To keep thinking about him all the time was driving her crazy.

  “Small Town, you okay?” April asked.

  Kandace watched the sun’s rays shining on squat buildings, the water in the distance, then sighed. “I guess. My dad hasn’t called back, and it’s really worrying me.”

  “Oh. That’s crap. I’m sorry,” April said. “We’ve got that in common.”

  “I thought your dad was dead.”

  “He is. But it’s all the same. He was a deadbeat.”

  “Really? You wouldn’t care if he were alive? At least you’d have a chance.”

  “It would be better if he were alive. Then I could get back my seven hundred he stole from me.”

  “Whoa. He robbed you?”

  “Yeah. Cheers to us lucky girls,” April said and clanged her glass with Kandace’s.Kandace licked her plate clean. “My dad needs me. He just doesn’t know how much. He’s been work obsessed. That’s what my mom says.” But still. She couldn’t help worrying and she felt powerless to help.

  “I can tell you’ve got the world on your mind. Girl, you need a drink,” April said.

  Kandace sighed and stood, moving to the sofa near the clothing bags. Is this what it felt like to be ecstatic and miserable at the same time for the same reason? A big payday could change her life, empower her to further her education, live on her own. But she could never tell her family. Or her friends.

  It was just one night, but she felt like a new life as Autumn had begun and she didn’t know how to quit thinking that way.

  April broke into Kandace’s deep well of thoughts. “Hey, if you’re worried, don’t be. If you gotta get to California, then just go. No one will make you stay if you don’t want to. A girl’s gotta do what a girl’s gotta do.”

  “But I have to get paid.”

  “Yeah. I know, Small Town. I know.”

  Fancy undergarments, tops, jeans, a skirt, shoes and jackets. April had been right. This was an entirely new wardrobe. She admired a sparkly lace thong and matching bra, smiling to herself over its silky material, pausing a beat when she noticed a price tag.

  “I feel guilty. This stuff is crazy expensive,” Kandace said.

  “You’re worth it, and you need to tell yourself that over and over until you believe it. Any money problems you got, they’re gone. I’ll get a Ph.D. and not a penny of debt. The damn shame is I’ll take a pay-cut when I graduate.”

  Kandace considered that. “Wow. That’s way better than student loans.”

  “Got that right. I’ll dance while I can, make the money to pay for school.”

  Kandace picked up a thong and held it up to natural light. “But eighty-five bucks for a thong? And one hundred thirty-five for a bra? Who pays so much for underwear?”

  “Oh, that’s the moneymaker right there. Put it on. Quit stalling.”

  “Don’t get me wrong, it’s really pretty. It just feels like a silly expense. I’ve gotten my underwear at Kohl’s,” Kandace said, tossing off her robe. “But for you, I’ll put the fancy underwear on.”

  “Work it, girl,” April said, watching Kandace dance, adorning herself. “That’s Agent Provocateur, by the way.”

  Kandace pranced at the mirror. “They look expensive. And feel like a million bucks.”

  “Hot damn, woman. I don’t know if there’s a God, but you were made in Heaven. You look like a billionaire’s mistress, taking selfies on a yacht in the Maldives. Shit. You’re making me wet.”

  Kandace watched April in the mirror. “Stop. You.” Kandace loved how the set looked and felt. How the bra held.

  Invading her thoughts again, her father came to mind and she tried to stay grounded. With Clayton in Seattle, she had time. April had a point: why rush out of town? Besides, she had to collect her pay.

  Maybe one more night dancing? One more night of easy money in St. Louis? Then if Markus got an address for her dad, she could buy a plane ticket. Until then, she had a free hotel room and food. And the best paying job ever.

  Kandace paused a moment, checking her backside. “How long does the spray tan last?”

  “You are as hot as you are distracted! Put on some clothes.”

  “I do not require you to watch me.”

  “Yeah, yeah. Those skinny jeans are going out of style you’re taking so long,” April said, playing with her phone.

  The fitted 7 For All Mankind jeans lived up to the hype. Then a curve-hugging cashmere black top with a V-neck that rested on the edge of her bra. A suede jacket to finish.

  April dropped her phone and whistled. “You are one hot date.”

  Kandace felt like a rich girl. Pampered. Provided for. “I’ve never had on, like, twelve hundred bucks in clothes. Not on my life. I can’t believe I’m wearing all this. I feel unworthy.”

  “Girl, you put the exotic in dancer.”

  “You think so?”

  “I know so.”

  Three pairs of footwear—black leather booties, metallic flats, canvas wedges.

  “I think every girl wants those,” April said, eyeing the booties as Kandace freed them from their packaging and slipped them on.

  “These are amazing. So comfortable too.”

  “They’re sassy. That’s all that matters,” April said, admiring them. “C’mon. Let’s blow off steam. See how they perform on a hard surface.”

  Kandace laughed a little. “Where we going?”

  “I’ll show you around town.”

  13

  The sensation of falling from the 19th floor was an adventure.

  Kandace admired the elevator’s gold inlays, marble floor, her reflection in the ceiling. She felt jittery and had no idea what to expect.

  “Pretty cool, huh?” April said. “I love this hotel.”

  “Totally,” Kandace said and took a selfie with April. “I’ve never been in an elevator like this. So, what’s fun here?”

  “We can walk to Citygarden. It’s not all that far, down on Market and 9th.”

  “And The Palace is close by?”

  “Yeah. Don’t worry. We won’t venture too far. It’s on the other side of the river, off 4th. We can go around three.”

  The elevator stopped at the first floor, and they strolled, perusing the fountains and fine furnishing like tourists until April backed into a golden sign for the concierge. When it hit the lobby floor, it clattered hard. They left quickly when other visitors started giving stern looks.

  “
I’ve always wanted to do that!” April said, stumbling out of the revolving door.

  “What? Nearly get kicked out of a hotel lobby? You so knocked over that sign!”

  “I was admiring a painting and I didn’t see it! People expect way too much of me.”

  “I don’t think you’re supposed to touch the artwork,” Kandace said.

  “I didn’t touch the painting, I was appraising the frame.”

  “You’re a bad influence on me. Now which way?”

  April twisted, looking down the street, as though momentarily lost. “Uh. South. I think. And I’m not a bad influence. I’m broadening your horizons. You’ll thank me later.” She pointed out different shops, tall buildings and places to visit while they walked. Narrow roads with parked cars on both sides of the street, accompanied by perfectly sized and colorful trees.

  “So, what did you get when you started?”

  April raised her eyebrows and grinned at the corners of her mouth. “Come again?”

  “New clothes? Shoes?”

  “Small Town, you’re a VIP. Your assets sold eleven memberships in one night.”

  “So?” Kandace said.

  “Okay. Teddy hooked me up with a five-hundred-dollar Visa card after my third shift and that was a big deal back then. Teddy was different.”

  Kandace slowed her pace on the sidewalk. “Okay, how?”

  “He was married, for one. And the Atlanta and Miami clubs weren't up and running yet, so there was way less money to play with.”

  “Hang on, Teddy was married?”

  “Yeah. I know, right? The perfect fit for monogamy. She’d been a dancer and had an opinion about everything. Once he threw her out, things got better; he mostly quit drinking. Girls didn’t want to work, and we had like two salaried managers doing the work of five or six. So, Teddy changed everything.”

  “Wow. The club got better?”

  April nodded. “Prices went up. Quality went way up. He fired the entire kitchen and hired a chef to rework the menu. Memberships got exclusive. Our glamor costs went up but stage fees went way down. He had a plan.”

  “How did he learn all this? The club business, I mean?”