* * *
Thank you so much for taking care of her, Leona.”
“Oh, pish,” My mother waves her hand at Marley. “You don’t need to thank me for taking care of my sweet granddaughter.” She touches Romany’s cheek, and Marley smiles while holding our baby girl to her chest. “Right. Well, I best be going.”
“I’ll see you out.”
Mom kisses Marley’s cheek, and then Romany’s head before following me out. She’s been great through all of this with Marley. Of course, as my mother she believed it her duty to tell me not to chase after Marley, and that as a Walker, I know to give a woman space when she needs it.
I open my mother’s car door for her. She drops her bag on the seat and turns to look at me. “I am so proud of you, Tallon.” I squint my eyes playfully, and she laughs. “Sorry. Roman. Aside from all the bad things you do with your club,” Things she has no idea of because I have done my best to keep it from her. “You are exactly the man that I hoped you would be. Seeing you with your daughter,” My mother puts her hand on my cheek and smiles.
“Are you all right, Mom?”
“I am more than all right, sweetheart. I’m just over here, appreciating my son.” I chuckle, and she smiles again. “What you’re doing for Marley and Romany... There are no words to express how very proud I am of you, Roman.”
I bite the inside of my cheek. My parents have both always told me how proud they are of me. Always have they been my biggest supporters in life. When Leah was born, Mom and Dad made sure that I knew I was still everything to them. Even at my age, it still means so much to me to know I make my mother proud.
I wrap my arms around my mother and kiss her head. “Thank you for believing in me, Mom. I couldn’t do any of this without you.”
“Nonsense.” She pulls away from me. “You’re a good man, Roman. Never let anyone tell you differently. Now, go inside and say goodnight to your family.” Mom kisses my cheek, climbs into her car, waves, and drives away.
I make my way back inside the house. I find Marley standing in the den, rocking Romany while gently humming to her. Marley turns to face me and smile, and my gut clenches. When she looks at me like that, it makes me think it’s me that she wants. However, deep down, I am terrified I’ll never get to hold her again.
“Are you okay, handsome?” I nod my head, unable to speak. “I thought you might want to help put our daughter to bed?”
I smile at Marley because this means a lot to me. Simply helping put my little girl to bed is everything. “I’d love to.”
It doesn’t take long to put Romany to bed. She’s already asleep. Marley is watching me as I kiss Romany’s head and tell her how much her Daddy loves her. Romany is too young to understand yet what I’m talking about, but I’ll let her know every day of her life just how much I love her. No one will ever come before her in my life. No one.
The time I get to spend with Romany is precious, though it makes me think of the past and what I lost. My heart aches sometimes with it, but when I hold my baby girl close to me, everything is right in my world.
I know that I would do anything for Romany, no matter what that was. I wasn’t expecting her to come into my life, but now that she’s here, I can’t lose her. Every day I have that fear in the back of my mind – the fear that Marley is going to choose her ex and I’ll lose my daughter. If Marley chooses him, it’ll hurt like hell, but it won’t kill me. It won’t because I’ll have my daughter. However, if that piece of shit does anything against my child, I’ll kill him. No, I’ll destroy him!
I made a promise to Romany the day she was born that I would always protect her and that I would always be there for her. No one is taking that from my baby girl, no one!
I kiss Romany’s head and then leave the room with Marley. I have to get out of here before I again do something stupid.
“Thank you for tonight, Roman. It’s been wonderful.”
I smile in spite of myself. “You’re welcome, beautiful.”
I step outside the house. Marley stands at the door, looking at me. I want to kiss her, and I want her to want me to. I also want her to ask me to stay, but I know it would be wrong. Marley would regret it in the morning, she’d still be confused, and I won’t have her hate me because of that.
“I should be going. I’ll collect Romany tomorrow.”
“What are you guys up to tomorrow?”
She’s drawing me into a conversation when she should be urging me to leave. “I was thinking about taking her to see my grandparents. They’re dying to meet her. I would have taken her before now, but I never seem to find the time.”
Marley swallows hard. She thinks I’m blaming her for not taking my daughter to meet my grandparents before now, but I’m not. I blame no one for that but myself. I smile and reach up my hand to tuck her blonde hair behind her ear. I just couldn’t stop myself. “If you need me for anything at all...”
“I’ll call you,” Marley replies with a smile.
It takes every ounce of strength I have to pull away from her. “See you soon, Marley.”
“Bye, Roman.”
God, give me the strength to give her the time and space she needs to get through this. Please give me the power to trust she’ll never take my daughter from me. I beg you.
Chapter Twelve
Marley
I am so confused right now. I have Marcus texting every day for us to meet up again, and Roman coming around acting like we’re best friends. However, I can’t deny that he is my best friend. He’s not pressuring me, and he’s been a true friend when I’ve needed one. I honestly can’t fault him, though when he leaves, I miss him so much.
But then I feel guilty because Marcus is still there in the back of my mind, still calling out to me like a ghost in the night. I feel like I’m being pulled apart by the two of them, and I am still no closer to figuring out which man, I want to spend my life with.
Maybe I should tell both of them that I’m not ready for anything with either of them. Cut them both off and live alone like I used to. Only this time, I have my little girl, so I’ll never be alone again.
That won’t work, though, because Roman will still be in and out every day to see his daughter. Marcus, I wouldn’t see again, but Roman, I would. I’m never going to escape that man no matter what I do, but do I really want to?
While Romany is with Roman, I’m meeting up with Elie and Coral. We’re having lunch, and just going to talk crap about anything and everything. They’ve left their kids at home, so it’s just us. I really need this girl time. I need to forget about men for a little while and have fun.
I’m wearing a white summer dress, and white sandals, my hair is loose, and I’m wearing light makeup on my face. My body is almost back to what it was before I had Roman. Though I doubt it will ever be the same. I don’t think about that much, there’s no point dwelling, I am who I am, and no amount of wishing I could change the way I look short of surgery will change that. So I think, fuck it.
I park my car at the side of the restaurant I’m meeting the girls in, Papa Joe’s, owned by Mafia Don, Draven Vidal. Why here of all places? I know the Don is related to Hammer and Maria, but I’m not comfortable with this life. I would much rather have gone to Macdonalds than here, and I don’t even eat Macdonalds!
Nevertheless, I make my way inside, tell the girl at the podium who I’m here to meet, and she leads me to a private booth at the back of the restaurant. Elie and Coral are already waiting for me. Elie looks stunning as always. She’s wearing tight black jeans, thigh high boots, and a cute little white blouse, hair in a French twist, makeup fit for the God’s.
Coral is wearing a loosely fitted summer dress that flows in all the right places. She is so utterly beautiful that she reminds me of a supermodel with curves in all the right places. Her blonde hair is loose like mine, and she’s not wearing makeup that I can see, just lipgloss. She wears her pregnancy well, and I envy her natural beauty.
I wonder what it must be like to have c
hildren so far apart in age? There are sixteen years between Elie and little Mark, and now Coral is five months pregnant with her third child. Her grandson will be older than his own niece or nephew. Not that that’s unusual, but it fascinates me.
“Marley!” Elie is out of her seat and hugging me tightly like she always does.
I laugh and hug her back. “Hey, guys.” I lean over and kiss Coral’s cheek. “Sorry I’m later, Romany was fussing, and I wanted to settle her before Roman took her out.”
“That’s okay, babe. We were just talkin’ about Mom’s pregnancy.”
I plop down in the seat beside Elie. “Oh yeah? How’s it going third time around?”
“Hard.” Coral sighs. “I don’t remember it being this hard with Elie or Mark. I feel so tired and drained all of the time.”
“Maybe your iron is low?” I suggest. I know mine was when I was pregnant with Romany. My energy was always zapped, and I think I pretty much slept through the first four months.
“I think so. I have an appointment with my doctor tomorrow. I’ll find out then. Anyway, how are things going with your men?”
Great. I didn’t want to talk about this today. I just wanted to meet up with them and talk about anything but Roman and Marcus.
“Fine. I don’t know. Marcus wants me to choose now, and Roman told me to take my time. They’re just both so different.”
“I don’t know this Marcus,” Coral points out. “But I do know Roman. I have known him most of my life. He’s a good man, always does the right thing, but he’s also a dangerous man when crossed.”
I swallow hard. I know he’s a dangerous man. I know the things Roman has done, he told me some of them back at the cabin, but I don’t think I’m comfortable hearing about it right now.
“He didn’t get the name Roman from nowhere.”
“Where did he get that name from?” Elie chuckles. She’s interested, but I’m not.
“Wrench never told you?”
“No.”
Why are they laughing?
What’s so funny about this?
“I thought he would’ve with Wrench and Roman being cousins. Has Roman told you?”
I shake my head while screwing up my face in a way that should have told her; I don’t want to know, can we drop this?
However, if Coral knows what it means, it doesn’t stop her. “Well, when Roman first became a prospect, I would have been about ten or eleven. Anyway, you know they have to go through all sorts of loyalty tests, right?”
Both Elie and I nod our heads. We’ve heard the stories. Roman told me a few, back at the cabin when he was trying to get me to open up to him.
“Roman has always had a thing about men harassing young women. He couldn’t stand it, just wasn’t raised that way. In any case, Roman saw this guy drag a girl from a club. Roman knew what the guy was going to do, so he followed them. The guy knew he was being followed; it’s not like Roman is quiet. He was quick, but Roman was quicker, he punched the kid out and then asked the girl what happened. She told Roman about the prick forcing her out of the club and how she knew he was going to rape her.”
I feel sick listening to this. All three of us at this table have suffered at the hands of one monster or another in our time. However, I guess it becomes reasonable to talk like this when you’ve been part of the MC life for as long as Coral has.
She shifts forward in her seat and stops talking when the waitress asks if we’d like to order. We all order the gnocchi and sparkling water. I don’t drink as I’m breastfeeding, Coral is pregnant, and so is Elie. I’m not sure if anyone else knows this yet, I’ve not heard it mentioned anyway, though I assume her husband and mother know.
Once the waitress has gone, Coral continues. “Roman called Titus, Tank’s father, and had him take the girl home. He then dragged the guy up and to a warehouse outside of town. By the time BlackJack, Shepard, Titus, Cueball, and some of the others got there, Roman was shirtless, covered in blood, and laughing to himself manically while smoking a cigarette.
“The guy Roman had dragged there,” She stops again as our food is placed in front of us. Once the waitress is out of earshot, she carries on. “The guy was stripped down to his underwear and nailed to a cross.”
“What?” My fucking heart is pounding all over my body!
“Yeah,” Coral nods. “Nails through his wrists, his feet, slash marks all over his body, blood pouring from his head. When Shepard asked what the hell Roman thought he was doing, without turning to look at anyone, Roman said, ‘They made a mistake crucifying Jesus, they should have stuck to crucifying animals like this one.’ Then he gutted the guy and set the cross and the guy alight and watched it burn to ash, never once looking away.”
I jump from the table and race to the bathroom. I only just make it to one of the most spacious, fancy looking bathroom stalls I’ve ever seen in my life, and to my knees with my head in the toilet in time to vomit.
Jesus Christ, what kind of man did I go to bed and make a child with?
A crazy bastard who got his name by crucifying people!
I don’t know what to think; my head is spinning. That is not the man, I know. Roman is kind, sweet, loving, my best friend.
Why would he do those things to people?
“You okay, Marley?”
I flush the toilet and step out of the cubicle and make my way over to the sink. I swill out my mouth with water and spit before I answer Elie. I look at her through the mirror in front of me. “I can’t believe Roman would do those things.” I’m shaking.
“He doesn’t do that often, Marley. Not at all. He protects women from monsters like Bulldog.” Bulldog, Elie’s child rapist father. That’s what she, Coral, and I have in common, that bastard monster of a man.
“I’m supposed to raise my daughter with a man capable of crucifying other men?”
Elie clasps my shoulders. I turn to face her, my ass resting back against the sinks. “You’re raising your daughter with a man who would tear the world apart if it meant keeping you and Romany safe, Marley. He would do anything for you, that includes walking away from you so you can be with another man if it makes you happy. However, he will still be there protecting you, no matter what, because you are the mother of the little girl he would die for.”
I don’t doubt that for one-second.
I can’t deny that Roman has gone above and beyond to save my life in the past. He’s always there when I need him. I don’t know the evil side of him; he’s never shown that to me. So it’s kind of hard to believe he’s anything but the beautiful man I know.
However, I can’t deny that he is evil in many ways.
Evil in a sense he kills those men who don’t deserve to live, just like Bulldog and his men didn’t deserve to live.
Roman protects the innocent, and can I really stand here and say that if someone ever hurts my daughter that I won’t want them dead?
I can’t because I would kill the bastard myself!
However, this isn’t a movie, this is real life, and I’m shaken the fuck up over this!
“I know hearing what he’s done has upset you, believe me, when I heard about the things Wrench has done it turned my stomach too, but those men love us. They would do anything to protect us, Marley. Roman is so in love with you that he’d do anything, including letting you go, including being there for you whenever you need him, just because he wants you happy and safe.”
“I’m so fuckin’ confused, Elie,” I admit. “I’m in such a bad place right now that I don’t even know what the hell I want to eat for breakfast each morning.”
She laughs out loud, and for some reason, it makes me laugh too.
I don’t know why we can’t stop. We’re even falling all over each other, but fuck, did I need this right now.
Elie wraps her arms around me and kisses my cheek. “Don’t take yourself too seriously, Marley. The answer will come to you soon enough. You don’t have to try so hard. You’ll know when the time is right, believe me.�
��
I nod against her.
Elie is right; I’m overthinking this when I really just need to go with the flow.
I won’t think about what Coral told me. I won’t because it will destroy what I think about the man I owe my life to, and I don’t want my feelings for Roman to change. I’ll love him no matter what I choose.
He’s the father of my baby, and I will never take her away from him. I’ll just make him understand that Romany is never to know those things about him.
Ever.
No little girl should ever know those things about her daddy.
I only wish I’d never found out what a cunt my father was.
Chapter Thirteen
Roman
My favorite grandson!” I roll my eyes at my grandmother, Emelda. She says that about all her grandson’s. She’s only got three, me, Hawk, and Wrench, and her little great-grandson’s Gabriel, DJ, and Kaleb, of course.
My grandparents have four children, two of each. However, only their daughter’s had sons. My mother has one, and Taylor has two. Taylor was more like a big sister to me growing up; however, just six years between us. My grandparents had her late in life, but she was very much wanted.
“You say that to everyone, grams.”
“Yes, but with you, I mean it.” She winks, and again, I roll my eyes as she kisses my cheek. She says that too.
“I want you to meet my daughter finally.”
“I am so excited!” She squeals while ushering me into the den where my eighty-year-old grandfather is sitting waiting for us.
I shake his hand and place Romany’s chair on the coffee table so they can see her. She’s wide awake and looking at them.
“She’s so beautiful, Roman! She’s your image, even has your coloring.”
She does. As the days go on, Romany’s tanned skin is starting to show.
My Jamaican born grandfather leans toward the baby and makes insane baby noises to her while pressing on her cheek with his finger. She smiles at him, and I see the love in his eyes for her.
Crucify Thy Demons: Snakes Henchmen MC Page 10