What The Heart Finds

by Gadziala, Jessica

  “Damaged isn't usually your type,” Liam reasoned.

  “Who says she's damaged?”

  “People who put up walls to keep people from getting close always have some kind of damage.”

  “Speaking from personal experience?” Eric asked, his lips turned up slightly.

  “Yes,” Liam said seriously. The silence that fell afterward felt heavy and strange.

  “Maybe it's just the challenge,” Eric suggested after a minute.

  “Because you're used to flashing a smile and making all the panties in town drop?” Liam asked, his tone amused.

  “I guess. It's a possibility. I mean... Anna was kind of the same way.” At Liam's raised eyebrow, he held up a hand to stop his retort. “Not in the guarded, damaged kind of way. But she was a challenge. She flip-flopped between wanting to keep me at arm's length and wanting me with her. She was unpredictable.”

  “And how is Lena unpredictable?”

  “She's clever. And sarcastic. Just when you think you got the better or her or got on her good side, she is saying something smart and snarky and throwing a wrench in the works.”

  “Speaking of wrenches,” Liam broke in. “ever think about what is going to happen when you fix her car and she has to go back to her life?”

  “Yeah,” Eric shrugged. “I mean... no big deal. I just want to be able to have some fun while she is around. But she keeps pushing me away.”

  “Maybe it's a big deal to her,” Liam suggested. “She doesn't exactly seem like the casual sex type.” Liam looked over at his brother for a moment, the dark smudges under his eyes that suggested a lack of sleep, the scruff on his cheeks. “So... you're telling me all you want from her is a trip around the sheets.”

  “Yeah,” Eric said, not meeting his eye. “What else would I want? Someone to chain myself down to?”

  “Someone to come home to,” Liam said casually, the idea rather lost on him. He went home to his books. And woke up to his books. He had lived a thousand lives. Fallen in love with hundreds of women. Then folded them all back up and moved on.

  “Who are you?” Eric asked, his eyebrows drawn together. Liam had never been the sentimental type. Always bookish. Always pragmatic. Sarcastically intellectual. Wise and clever. But never sensitive.

  Liam laughed, rubbing his chin and pouring them each another glass. “I dunno. Blame the whiskey. But maybe you're getting tired of all the skirt chasing.”

  “The skirt chasing has been fun,” Eric defended without much conviction.

  “Yeah, man, but you've been doing it since you were fourteen. I think the better part of twenty years has been a pretty long run. Everything gets old eventually.”

  “You obviously have not spent enough time around women,” Eric said, smiling devilishly.

  “I'm obviously not saying you're going to give up women. But maybe that you would like to settle down and get to know one in particular for longer than a night or a weekend.”

  “Come on. I'm not that bad...”

  Liam got up, walking behind the counter and grabbing a tray of leftover cookies. “Look. I know that what happened with Anna really cut...”

  “Oh, please,” Eric said, attempting a smile. “I got over that just fine.”

  “If by 'got over' you mean you fell into bed with every woman you came across who was willing... then yeah.”

  “I was always...”

  “No,” Liam interrupted, picking apart a cookie and not eating it. They really were pretty awful. He should probably look into getting store-bought ones. “Before Anna you were a... connoisseur of women. You flirted with all of them but spent some time charming a fair few a year. After Anna, you just... man you kinda became a player. It was all that awful wham-bam-thank-you-ma'am kind of thing. You screwed anyone who crossed your path. You went out of town and screwed around with all kinds of strange.”

  “Did you really just use the term 'strange'? What are we, teenagers?” Eric asked, uncomfortable, trying to steer the conversation in a different direction.

  “Regardless... that's what you did. And that's why the town went from casually warning their daughters away from you to downright loathing you. I mean I thought it was just a phase. Something you needed to get out of your system. Palate cleansing or whatever you want to call it. But it's been two years.”

  “I know how long it's been. So what. What do you want me to do here? Date Lena? Get into a relationship with someone who is going to go back to the city in a week or so? Do the long distance thing?” he asked, laughing a bit, the whiskey making him warm and silly.

  Liam leaned against his chair, rocking it back onto two legs. “No. I guess not.”

  “So what's so wrong with trying to get a little fling in before she leaves?”

  “It's not a problem...”

  “Exactly.”

  Liam looked up at the ceiling for a moment, shaking his head. “Why do you come here? You never take my advice.”

  “For the whiskey,” Eric teased, filling their glasses again. At the rate he was going, he was going to have to crash on the uncomfortable love seat Liam had wedged between the science fiction and romance sections. “I dunno... she's different, man. And she wants me.” Liam groaned, looking uncomfortable. Eric chuckled. “Oh she does. She doesn't want to want me, but she does. I mean... she bought me.”

  “That was pity,” Liam pointed out.

  “Yeah,” Eric agreed. “But the dollar bid. The not too subtle f-you of it all. She could have turned around, not paid me any attention like all the other women.”

  “All the other women wouldn't look at you because you had slept with them, their sisters, mothers, aunts, and best friends,” Liam smirked.

  “I took her to the stream we used to mess around at as kids.”

  “You took big-city-expensive-slacks-ridiculous-high-heeled-girl to the stream?”

  “Yeah,” Eric said, his head feeling like it was swimming. “She kicked off her shoes and played around in the water. Then she climbed out and climbed on top of me.”

  “Alright,” Liam laughed, holding up a hand. “I don't need to hear the details.”

  “Not much to tell. A deer interrupted,” he said, taking in Liam's amused expression and feeling himself start to laugh.

  “You got cock-blocked by a deer?” Liam asked, dangerously close to laughing. Something he very rarely did.

  “Yup. And tonight I got cock-blocked by Aiden.”

  Liam's brow furrowed. “How did that happen?”

  “I climbed up the trellis at the inn...”

  “Seriously? You scaled a building for the woman?”

  “Tapped on her window and all that shit. It was romantic. We were messing around...”

  “On the balcony?”

  “Yeah, on the balcony. Stop being such a prude,” Eric smiled. “And she was so close to letting me in her room. And damn Aiden decided to take the opportunity to get into his truck.”

  Liam watched Eric pour another glass, not envying the shape he was going to be in the morning. They weren't kids anymore and Eric had never been a heavy drinker. “Ever consider that maybe she's just horny?” he asked, watching Eric's face twist into disbelief. “No seriously. Maybe it doesn't have anything to do with you. She seems like the workaholic type. Maybe she just hasn't gotten any in a while. So then there you are and her defenses are down. She doesn't actually want you, but her body doesn't seem to understand that...”

  Eric felt insecurity well up, foreign and uncomfortable. It wasn't a feeling he was familiar with. He was always attractive, always charming enough to know he had the ability to get most women to be interested in him. And not having a type himself, he had enjoyed a wide range of women. Thin, curvy, heavy. All different ages and races. He never had to actually try to work hard at getting a woman to want to take him to bed.

  But that was exactly what was happening with Lena. He had to work at it. And that fact made him start to feel a little less l
ike himself. A little less confident. A little less skilled.

  “Alright I take it back,” Liam said, watching a range of emotions play their way across Eric's face. “Let's face it... the chances of that are probably not that high. I mean, she could be horny. But she also probably wants you.”

  “So then what's the problem?” Eric asked, not expecting an answer.

  Liam waved a hand around the room. “Have you ever read a book?” he asked, his tone back to its usual condescension.

  “And what would the books tell me?” he asked, for once hoping for a real answer.

  “I mean... women want Gatsby staring at the green light. And Westley coming back and saving Buttercup from marriage to the wrong man. And Colonel Brandon's patient, stalwart waiting...”

  “Alright,” Eric broke in, laughing. “I get it. I need to put more effort in. Showing up and feeling her up just isn't going to cut it.”

  “Yeah that's... sort of what I meant,” Liam said, shaking his head.

  “Alright. I'll do that,” Eric said, standing slowly and reaching out to steady himself. “As soon as the world stops spinning, I am going to romance the hell out of that woman,” he declared, rapping Liam on the shoulder and making his way out of the store, stumbling more than once on his way back to the garage.

  Eleven

  Lena woke up the next morning hot. Physically over-heated but also, she admitted grimly, sexually frustrated.

  Apparently hiding away at the inn wasn't any kind of deterrent to Eric O'reilly. The man had climbed a building for goodness sake. And she had let him get her topless. On a balcony. Just tits out for anyone to see. Lena put her head in her hands, shutting her eyes tightly as if she could squeeze the memory out of them.

  She comforted herself with the idea that he should have gotten the rest of her car parts and in a few days she could get the hell out of there. Away from him. Back to her life.

  She tried to stifle the fleeting thought that she would regret leaving without having taken Eric to bed. It was a ludicrous idea. But it was there. Right underneath all her rational thoughts, hanging there heavy and insistent.

  “Get it together,” she said out loud, picking through her closet and pulling out blue slacks with white pinstripes and a white off-shoulder shirt. Maybe if she went down to the dining room and casually chatted up some people, she might be able to get a little bit more information. Like when the busiest time of year was. And how many people usually stayed at the inn at a time.

  Since she had arrived, she had only seen two other guests. Both of whom seemed to be very familiar with the town. They were probably family members of townspeople. Maybe they would have some more information for her.

  “Hey Miss. Edwards,” Devon greeted her as she descended the stairs. For once he wasn't glued to his phone. “How has your stay been so far?”

  Lena smiled. Devon. A perfect untapped resource. “It's been nice. Is it always so... slow here?”

  Devon moved out from behind the desk, casually leaning against the banister. He wore a gray vest over a black dress shirt and black skinny jeans. And he had on sneakers, Lena realized with a smile. He somehow managed to pull the look off. “It's on and off. We get busy around the winter. There's a mountain up that way,” he said, gesturing out toward the side of the inn. “There's a lodge with skiing, snowboarding, all the fun winter sports stuff. So when they fill up, we get the leftovers. From November through February we are usually about half or three-fourths full. It should be more,” he said, sounding confident and informed. “But the road gets treacherous sometimes and we have no other way to get guests back and forth.”

  “You know a lot about it,” Lena commented, curious.

  “Well,” he said, smiling at her, his horn-rimmed glasses slipping down his nose slightly. “I should. My family owns the lodge.”

  “And yet you work here,” Lena half-asked.

  “Yes, well. Would you want to work for your family if you didn't have to?”

  “True,” Lena agreed. “But you know... there really isn't any other way to cart quests up that steep of an incline.”

  “Oh there are always ways,” Devon said, smiling. Charming. Intelligent. “From the somewhat silly but low cost idea of dog sleds to the much more expensive but practical idea of a gondola transport system.”

  “That is actually a really great idea,” Lena said, impressed. She never would have even thought of it. Devon was wholly underutilized working at a front desk at a small inn. Despite his preferences for not working with his family, it was where he should be. Making a difference. Using his innovative imagination to make the business even better than it currently was. “You know that would even be a benefit for the lodge. The staff can get into town more easily even when the weather is bad. Or when they find themselves low on supplies. Have you brought this up to your family?”

  Devon smiled, the gesture forced and slightly bitter. “My family is very stubborn. Set in their ways. And they see me as a silly kid still. They wouldn't listen if I tried.”

  “That's a shame,” Lena said, her words full of conviction. EM would love the idea. EM would jump at it, eating the overhead cost knowing it would pay off in the long run. She would make sure that when she presented the idea to him, that she would give Devon full credit. Insist that EM bring that up when he spoke about it with Devon's family. Maybe they would take him seriously if a man like Elliott Michaels decided his idea was gold.

  Devon shrugged a shoulder, brushing it off. “I'm really better suited here. I get to do my own thing.”

  Lena gave him a small, tight-lipped smile. There were too many young people like Devon. People with great, innovative minds who just lacked the passion to follow through. If he just applied himself...

  Lena shook her head. Not everyone was like her. And Devon had grown up privileged. He hadn't experienced the soul-sucking poverty that had led her to smashing through any obstacle that got in the way of her goals. “What's your last name Devon?” she asked, wanting to know who to give credit to.

  “Windsor, my lady,” he said smiling and bowing to her.

  Lena laughed, the sound sweet and musical. “Well, Devon Windsor,” she said, still smiling. “care to escort me to breakfast?”

  “The pleasure would be all mine,” Devon gushed, offering her his arm.

  He led her to a table next to a window, sitting down across from her without asking permission. “So what brings you here? It's not ski season. We haven't started all the summer farm events that brings a certain crowd. Or the fall when we get all the people interested in our crazy autumn celebrations. You literally picked the worst time of year to visit.”

  “Well,” she said, smiling at the surly waiter who dropped off a cup of coffee for her and an energy drink to Devon. Without having been asked. “I have a... friend who suggested this town. He had spent a few nights here once. And then my boss forced me to take my unused vacation time. Since I didn't have anywhere else to go, I thought this would be as good as any.”

  “Are you disappointed?” Devon asked, throwing back half of the energy drink in one swig. “This place doesn't really seem your speed.”

  “No. I'm not... disappointed. I didn't have any expectations really. I was just curious. And I mean... the horseback riding and cheese tasting were a lot of fun. I feel kind of lost without my car to be honest. I cant go explore anything.”

  “And maybe you hadn't quite been prepared for local legend Eric O'reilly,” Devon supplied, crossing a personal boundary in such a casual way that she couldn't fault him for it.

  “Yes, well. Yeah... that wasn't in my plans. I just wanted to get away for a few days and enjoy some peace and quiet.”

  “Yeah you're not going to get that with Eric interested in you.”

  “He's interested in everyone,” Lena grumbled, putting cream and sugar into her coffee.

  “True enough,” Devon allowed. “But you know he's not just the man whore everyone calls him. H
e's actually a pretty decent guy.”

  “Wow,” Lena said, raising a brow. “No one seems to want to defend him. Except...”

  “Anna,” Devon supplied, nodding. He placed his arms on the table, leaning in like he was about to share a bit of juicy gossip. “I was here for that whole thing. I met Anna at the Spring Into Summer dance and that was right in the middle of the whole love triangle thing they had going on.”

  “Sam seems like a really great guy,” Lena said, feeling a bit uncomfortable.

  “Salt of the Earth,” Devon agreed. “He's really great to Anna. They're happy. But Eric and Anna were an interesting pairing too. I was kind of routing for them to be honest. I always ship the wrong couples.”

  “Ship?”

  “Yeah,” Devon said, smiling with a bit of superiority as if she was behind the times. “Ship. As in shipping. It means you root for two people to be together.”

  “Ah I see,” Lena smiled, thinking how long it had been since she didn't recognize some sort of slang term. “Why did you... ship them?”

  “I don't know. Anna really brought out the good in Eric.”

  “Probably because she is so good herself,” Lena agreed.

  “Exactly. But I think she made the right choice. No matter how much Eric loved her, I think he needs a more challenging woman. Someone to call him on his bullshit. He would just eat that up.”

  Lena silently stirred her coffee, choosing not to think about how that pretty much described her. “So what about you?” Lena asked. “Are you seeing... anyone special?” she asked carefully, not entirely sure if Devon was straight or gay or fluid.

  “No,” Devon said, smiling wickedly. “no special lady for me. Not for lack of trying,” he said, winking.

  “Oh come on now,” Lena said. “You're a good looking, charming guy.”

  “Oh, it's not me,” Devon said, laughing like that was ridiculous. “It's just... hard to date girls who you used to give yourself cootie shots for. Kinda ruins the romance when you flash back to that one time that they tattle-taled on you for trying to take an extra ice pop at the school fair.”