Alien in Chief

by Gini Koch

  “What . . . why are you mad at me?”

  “I’m not. But, seriously, we need Normal Suave and On Top of Things Chuckie back, not Mister Emotions’ Wild Ride Chuckie hanging around, moping, whining, threatening, and generally playing into all our enemies’ hands.”

  He blinked. “I’m helping our enemies?”

  I shoved him gently onto the bed. “Dude, think about it. If you’re out of commission, then the best mind we have is out of commission. Why do you think Cliff centered all his evil crap on you? Sure, because of the insane rivalry, but it’s there because you’re smarter than he is.”

  He shook his head. “He’s been three steps ahead of us for years.”

  “Because we didn’t know who the hell the Mastermind was. We know now. Sure, we have some catching up to do, and we have to hide that we know he’s a freaking backstabbing traitorous loon, but we are catching up. And our allies, such as the President, are aware of who and what Cliff really is, and he doesn’t know that they know. But we need you, the real you, in order to catch up all the way. And that means we need you focused on getting better and on doing what you do best, which is thinking, not going off on a wild wife chase that will only end in heartbreak all around.”

  He was quiet for a few long moments. “Why are you saying this to me today?”

  “Versus at any other time over the last fourteen months? Because you told me today that you think Naomi’s still out there somewhere. I could be spitballing here, but I think that means you’ve been trying to find her all these months. And that’s probably contributing to all your health issues in a big, nasty, negative way. And I’m telling you that you need to stop it. For you, for us, for Earth. And for the two people Naomi sacrificed herself to save—you and Jamie.”

  Chuckie stared at me for another few moments. “What if I can’t?”

  CHAPTER 6

  HEAVED A SIGH AND asked the key question. “Can’t or won’t?”

  Chuckie managed a wry smile. “Either.” He heaved his own sigh and reached for his meds. “You’re right, you know. I don’t want to stop looking for her. And yes, I have been. Desperately. Which is pathetic.”

  “No, it’s not. It’s human.” I turned on his iPod and selected the Soothing Songs playlist I’d created for him. Melissa Etheridge came on, softly singing “Sleep.” “You loved her and she was taken from you. Why wouldn’t you want to find her again?”

  “Yeah.” He took his pills and lay down. “But I think you’re also right—I may have imagined it.” He didn’t sound convinced of this.

  “Look, let’s say you’re right. What, exactly, can you do?” Hoped his answer wasn’t going to be to take a lot of Surcenthumain and become a superconsciousness. Or die.

  “Nothing. Because if she’s still here, it isn’t here, you know? I don’t think she’s anywhere on Earth. Or really on any planet. I just feel like she’s out there, somewhere.”

  “That’s how a lot of people feel when they lose someone—that the person’s spirit is still out there, watching over them. And if that’s true, then I know Naomi’s watching over you. And I also know that she doesn’t want you wasting your life away, allowing her family and friends, her goddaughter, and the husband she loved so much to be destroyed.”

  This I did know to be true, so I wasn’t lying so much as protecting all of us, Naomi included, from the Superconsciousness Supreme Court.

  Chuckie nodded and his eyes got droopy. Had to hand it to Tito, the medicines he created worked fast. And if Melissa Etheridge wanted you to go to sleep, you went to sleep. “You’re right, Kitty.” He reached for me and I took his hand in mine. “Thanks for always being there for me.”

  I kissed his forehead. “Always, and right back atcha. Now, get some rest and feel better—I’m going to go back to Stress Central and figure out our next moves.”

  He heaved one more sigh and then his hand went lax. He was asleep. I covered him up with a throw blanket, turned the music down a little more, then, as his Poof, Fluffy, and Naomi’s Poof, Cutie-Pie, crawled out of his pockets and snuggled on either side of his neck, I quietly left.

  Decided to take a quick look in at the kids, mostly because any time Chuckie was like this I had a strong suspicion Jamie knew somehow and was upset by it. So I used hyperspeed, which I had thanks to giving birth to Jamie, and headed upstairs one floor to the daycare center.

  To find Seraphim’s version of “Baby Face” on the airwaves and Amy Gaultier-White in da house, playing with the kids. A year ago this would have been odd—Amy loved all the kids, but she wasn’t someone who was going to drop everything because a baby was nearby. Then.

  But Amy and Christopher were finally pregnant and, since her second trimester, Amy had been spending more and more time with the kids, particularly in the daycare center. This was fine with Denise and all the rest of the parents, but since Amy was also still fighting off the rest of the Gaultier Enterprises board members—well, the evil ones, which I kind of assumed were all of them until we discovered differently—her attachment to the kids was kind of freaky.

  It was definitely freaking Christopher out. But Jeff wasn’t overly concerned about it, and since we were reasonably sure that we’d gotten rid of all the emotional blockers and overlays our enemies had planted everywhere, if he didn’t feel Amy was off the deep end, then the rest of us didn’t need to worry.

  “Hey Ames, how goes it?”

  She was holding Jamie in her lap. Unlike me—both times—Amy hadn’t turned into Henrietta Hippo during pregnancy. She looked great, though there was definitely a baby on board. Also unlike me, her long red hair really looked more luxurious, her skin was clear and glowing, and she had a Madonna and Child look going with Jamie. She was one of my oldest and closest friends, so I chose not to hate her.

  “Okay. Kitty, is Chuck okay?”

  Well, that explained why Jamie was in her lap. “Migraine.” Which was our code for Chuckie’s Delicate Condition.

  “We figured.” Amy hugged Jamie. “I’ll bet your mommy got your Uncle Charles all taken care of.”

  Trotted over and gave Jamie a kiss. “I did. He’ll be fine.”

  “I miss Auntie Mimi, too,” Jamie said.

  Not good. I had no idea if she was reading Chuckie’s mind, if they had some sort of mind-link due to what had happened during Operation Civil War, or if she just knew why Chuckie was always sad these days. But still, of all of us, the one most likely to be able to contact Naomi was Jamie—because she housed ACE inside of her.

  ACE was a superconsciousness that had been created by those on Alpha Four who’d wanted to keep all their exiled people firmly on Earth. During Operation Drug Addict, when we’d discovered ACE and what he was supposed to be doing, I’d originally filtered ACE into Paul Gower, Naomi’s older brother and the current Supreme Pontifex of the Earth A-Cs.

  ACE had always been our protector, and after Operation Destruction, Alexander had ensured that any imposed restraints ACE might still have were removed, essentially freeing ACE to protect Earth as he saw fit. But due to events that happened during Operation Defection Election and some other, extremely interfering superconsciousnesses, ACE had had to move into Jamie, for both his protection and hers.

  I knew that ACE, like Algar, knew Naomi was still around, so to speak. Whether this meant Jamie knew for sure or not I didn’t know. And I was afraid to ask.

  “We all miss her, Jamie-Kat.” I stroked her hair as “Mysterious Ways” by U2 came on. “Are you okay?”

  She nodded. “Auntie Amy’s here.” She patted Amy’s stomach. “And Becky’s here, too.”

  “Excuse me?” This was a new one.

  New to Amy, too. She looked confused. Well, not about the sex of the baby—since Jamie, the “no finding out the sex prior to birth” rule the A-Cs had had was struck from the rulebook. But to my knowledge, Amy and Christopher hadn’t settled on a name.
>
  “Ah, we haven’t picked the name yet, sweetie,” Amy said, right on cue.

  “She likes Becky,” Jamie said as if she was stating that water was wet.

  Amy and I exchanged the “oh really?” look. “Ah, well,” Amy said slowly, “that’s one of the names we’ve been talking about—Rebecca Ann. But it’s not the only one.”

  “It’s the one she likes,” Jamie said. “And she wants to be called Becky by her friends.”

  “Well, as I remember,” I said carefully, “this generation all likes to be named early.” Jamie had certainly responded to her name while in utero, and we’d had to assign names to some of the other hybrids during labor for their safety and the safety of their mothers. “Apparently you’re having a talented girl.”

  Amy nodded. “But we knew that.” True enough. All of our crop of hybrids had shown their talents early. Though none as much as my children, at least so far.

  Speaking of which, Charlie crawled over, looking indignant for being ignored this long. I picked him up and hugged him while he cuddled into my neck. “I guess you need to tell Christopher that the name is set.”

  Amy managed a laugh. “I guess so.” She hugged Jamie. “Thanks for letting me know.”

  Jamie hugged her back, beaming. “You’re welcome, Auntie Amy.” If I ignored Jamie’s continuing ability to communicate with other children while they were still in the womb, some of which was probably due to ACE, everyone seemed fine, and I had a meeting I needed to get back to. Hugged Amy, kissed Jamie, kissed Charlie and handed him off to Amy, and headed off again.

  Used hyperspeed to get back downstairs quickly. Christopher still worked with me regularly on my skills and control, and I almost never slammed myself into walls anymore. At least, not very often.

  “. . . so, I think we’re going to have to say yes,” I heard Jeff say as I rejoined him and the others to Flo Rida’s “Club Can’t Handle Me.”

  “To visitors or to activating The Clarence Clone?” I asked as I seated myself to the beat.

  “Both, honestly, baby.” Jeff sighed. “By the way, I didn’t want to say this while Chuck was in the room, but Cliff knows about the message from the Planetary Council.”

  “How so?”

  “We were having a meeting with the Cabinet and their top people. Cliff’s the head of FEMA now, he was there.”

  “Fantastic. What’s his stance on the NASA Base situation?”

  “Out loud? Total support for keeping the Base open.”

  “Is that the general viewpoint?”

  “Most. Shocking no one, the Secretary of Transportation is against it. A few others. Some not for anti-alien reasons, at least out loud.”

  Cleary nodded. “I understand the issue, in that sense. The issue is that with you all out in the open, why have a special base at NASA just for A-Cs?”

  “Because the majority of our tech comes from there?” I asked with only a hint of sarcasm.

  Cleary shrugged. “Just as much comes from Dulce. However, I don’t want to say yes to closing NASA Base.”

  “Then that’s going to be on you, Gideon. Because you’re the dude who started the whole ‘shut it down’ movement in the first place.”

  “Yes, I know, Ambassador.”

  “Why so formal? All of a sudden, I mean.” Looked around. Nope, no one of importance had just arrived via Stealth Mode.

  “He’s trying to focus you on the fact that you’re going to have to take an active role in preserving NASA Base,” Jeff said. “And he’s not wrong.”

  “What about the Stephanie the Huntress situation?”

  “That we’re leaving to me, Missus Chief,” Buchanan said. “And the boys are going to make sure that happens,” he added, nodding at Len and Kyle, who nodded right back with super-serious expressions. Apparently what had been discussed in my absence was me and my expected roles. And how to prevent me from doing anything too active.

  “Fine, fine. Well, I guess that means some of us are heading to Florida.” Meaning Jamie, Charlie, Len, Kyle, and I were definitely heading to Jeff’s parent’s house. That would make Alfred and Lucinda happy, so that was one for the win column. “Jeff, are you coming with us or do you have to stay up here?”

  “It’ll depend on what we determine we’re doing about the Planetary Council.”

  “We’re in a damned if we do and damned if we don’t situation,” Cleary said. He and Jeff started discussing the various options, with Buchanan and even the boys adding in. No one was thrilled.

  Considered the option they hadn’t. “You know, why don’t we just kill two birds with one spaceship?”

  CHAPTER 7

  GOT THE ROOM’S ATTENTION with that one. All the men stared at me for a few long seconds.

  “Excuse me?” Cleary asked finally.

  “If we have the Planetary Council arrive at NASA Base, it would make a statement that the Base is necessary, plus keep the Planetary Council out of D.C.”

  “They want to chat with the President, I’m sure,” Jeff said. “I don’t think we want to drag Vince down to Florida for this.”

  “Why not?” Cleary asked. “I mean that seriously. It’s his home state, too, and, frankly, I like the Ambassador’s idea.”

  “And if things get dull, we can always take them to Disney World.” The entire room ignored this statement. Always the way.

  “I’m not sure about the logistics, Gideon,” Jeff said, as if I hadn’t spoken. “And a spaceship over Florida is no better than a spaceship over Washington.”

  “Have them show up via the Alpha Five Transport System.” This one got the room’s attention, go me. “They’re all comfortable with that method, and as long as no one’s trying to stop them their trip here should be relatively smooth.”

  “You just don’t want to be away from the action,” Jeff said. Accurately.

  Not that I was going to admit that. “I think we solve several problems by doing this all at NASA Base, and if Gideon’s with us, then he’s away from Stephanie. And The Clarence Clone is in Florida, too.” “Road Runner” by Aerosmith came on, as if to solidify the rightness of my train of thought. “Really, I think it’s road trip time.”

  Jeff sighed and pulled his phone out. He looked at Kyle. “Turn the music off. I don’t want to talk to the President with rock music screaming in the background.”

  “Spoilsport,” I muttered.

  Kyle grinned and sent a text, presumably because Jeff was dialing and Kyle didn’t want to use the intercom system therefore. The music stopped. Did my best not to pout. Failed, if Buchanan trying not to laugh was any indication.

  “Hey Vince. Kitty’s suggested we have the Planetary Council arrive via phasing transport, meaning no spaceships. Yeah, I agree. Also, she’s suggested that they arrive at NASA Base.” He was quiet for a bit. “Yeah, that’s her thinking, too. It’ll allow us to easily activate TCC at the same time as well.” He chuckled. “I’ll tell her.” He hung up and turned to me. “Vince likes your plan.”

  “Really?”

  “Yeah. He said that suggestions in these matters from the woman who averted the total destruction of Earth at least twice probably should be listened to.”

  “Vince is my favorite. But I think it’s been more than twice.”

  Jeff heaved a sigh. “You can argue with him about it on Air Force One, baby. We’re flying down there. Tonight.”

  Let that sit on the air for a bit. Then found the right words. “No way in hell are we doing that.”

  Before Jeff or anyone else could argue, I quickly explained why it just wasn’t that simple. In part because we had a huge entourage if it was just going to be our family unit going to Florida. And seeing that it was us, there was no way that only Jeff, the kids, and I were going. Half the Embassy was going to want to go and, once Jeff let Alpha Team know what was going on, they were all going to want to
come, too.

  Most embassies didn’t clear out half their personnel when the Ambassador was going on a short trip. But most embassies probably weren’t packed to the gills with personnel and family members like ours was. And most embassies also didn’t expect their ambassadors to get attacked merely by crossing state lines. We were just special that way.

  “We could tell them all no,” Jeff said finally, in the tone of voice of a man who already knows he’s lost that battle.

  “As if. We’re going to have far too many people who have legitimate reasons to come along to fly them down unless we take not only Air Force One and Air Force Two but also Air Forces Three through Twelve as well. Which, even if they exist, would be okay, as long as we aren’t racing down there like our parents are coming home from vacation a day earlier than we expected and we’re desperately trying to clean up the house from the all university kegger we threw the night before.”

  “I’m not even going to ask why you used that as an example.” Jeff heaved a sigh and dialed again, this time putting us on speakerphone.

  Repeated my issues, kegger example included. Armstrong didn’t seem to have any issues with it. Then again, I knew he’d been in a frat. “Vince, it’s insane to drop everything and race down. And I doubt the Planetary Council expects it, either. Let’s get ready, as in really ready, prepped to do double duty or more on the way there, and let’s go in such a way that we don’t appear to be running.”

  Heard a sneeze.

  “Bless you. Are you getting a cold?”

  “Maybe,” Armstrong said. Was fairly sure I heard him trying to discreetly blow his nose. “If so, it just came on in the last hour. But anyway, you have a good point, Kitty. Several of them, really. Fine. As you say, we won’t race like panicked maniacs. We’ll plan an impromptu campaign trip down to Florida that will provide us a safe political reason for the trip and allow us all to be at NASA Base whenever we ask the Planetary Council to meet us there. Gideon, you’ll get things set up on your end?”