Private Show (The Private Series)

by Torella, Danielle

  I put my hands on his chest and look into his mocha eyes, “I am thankful that you got me the interview, but I can’t just walk out of here. How about I put in my two weeks? If I don’t get the job at Tones then I can at least find a new job that doesn’t remind me of Dave.”

  “Fine, but your happiness is what matters the most.” he sighs. “What time do you get done today?”

  “In an hour.”

  He kisses me on the forehead and tells me, “I’ll come and get you then.”

  “Okay, I love you.”

  “Love you.”

  And I watch his fine ass walk out of the shop.

  Apparently every Sunday, Ben goes to his family’s house for dinner. Now this is not something you see or hear about a twenty-five-year-old guy doing. And I have agreed to join him. Why oh why? Especially after seeing that heated dispute last night at the Halloween party? But let’s just say that Ben can be very persuasive…

  I am interested to find out more about Caroline, though. I am honestly a little worried about her. I know being a teen girl is not easy, especially one who is a little different or unique and from what I can tell Jack doesn’t fully get it or understand her dreams.

  Huh, yeah that’s extremely familiar. My dad never accepted my desire to be an artist or the way I expressed myself. I don’t want to see Caroline go through what I did and I am pretty sure Ben has the same concern for his baby sister.

  When we walk into the house, you would never know that a huge Halloween party went down not even twenty-four hours ago. Then I wonder how much it must have cost to pay someone or a group of people to clean that mess up.

  Ben announces that we are here and Gwen comes out of the kitchen. She is wearing a flowy ankle-length skirt and a white blouse; she looks her usual hippy-chick self today.

  She is smiling from ear to ear. “Benjamin, Tess! How are you? What a nice surprise to see you, Tess.” She gives me a big bear hug. It’s comforting.

  “You two are too cute,” she says. She steps away and Ben is quickly at my side, it’s like he needs to be as close to me as possible, like he needs air to breathe. I am not complaining, because I feel the same, I feel comforted when he is near. My heart aches when we are apart and that could just be for a few hours. Most would say that is unhealthy, but I think it’s unhealthy to want to be apart from the man you love so desperately.

  She walks us into the kitchen and we look around for the rest of the Mitchell clan, but they are nowhere to be seen. “Where’s Dad at?” Ben asks his father’s girlfriend.

  Fixing up a tossed salad, Gwen answers, “Oh…” She smiles a thousand-watt smile and does a little bounce. God, she is so cute and funny! “Get this… he is out back grilling!”

  I don’t see the humor in this. I mean, men grill, right? But obviously they know something I don’t. “What?” Ben spits out in utter shock. “We have had that grill ever since we moved here and he has never used it once!”

  “I know!” Gwen oozes with excitement. I can’t help but smile and shake my head… weirdos!

  Ben is looking slightly more relaxed; on the way here he seemed tense. Nervous even, probably because of that tiff at last night’s party. He chuckles, kisses me on the cheek and says. “Well, I would like to be able to eat my dinner tonight. Maybe I should go check on him…” Gwen and I laugh, but how bad can a guy be on a grill?

  I can’t help but watch Ben saunter away. Gwen pinches my arm, pulling me out of my stare. “What?” I giggle.

  “You got it bad, young lady.” She winks at me.

  I can’t help but sigh, because she is right. “So, you and Jack…How did that come about? You two seem so different.”

  She gives me a light laugh. “It’s a funny story actually. It was about two years ago and I was at the grocery store. I was passing through the ‘girl’ aisle when I noticed a very distinguished and flustered man, comparing two different pads packages. I sat back to watch what he was going to do… well that and checking him out.” She chuckles at the memory, and continues. “After a minute of me drooling, I decide to offer some help to the poor guy.

  “When I get to him his face goes red and he drops one of the packages, I couldn’t help but laugh. We both bent to go pick it up, I got to it first. I told him the one he is left holding was the better choice. He thanked me and I fell for him as soon as I heard his accent. British men are just… wow, well you know.” She winks.

  I smile back at her, waiting for her to finish her story. “I asked him if he was shopping for his wife. He told me no and that he was sent there on a mission from his thirteen-year-old daughter who had just gotten her period for the first time. He was so uncomfortable, Tess. I then asked why the girl’s mother wasn’t there picking them out, and he had told me she had passed when she was born.”

  I recall the time Ben had expressed his love for his mother and how sad he was that Caroline wouldn’t ever know her mother. “That couldn’t have been an easy time or task for Jack to take on, especially with a teen girl going through so many changes. He must have been grateful for your help that day and even now.”

  She has a smile of content on her face. She goes on, “I offered him my number in case he had any other girl questions that needed answering. He was hesitant at first, but once he thought about it, he accepted it. I got a call a few days later.”

  Her story is sweet and makes me like Jack that much more, now I just need to find out from Ben why he seems so tense around him at times. Just as that thought rushes into my head Ben and Jack are coming into the house carrying a platter of steaks and grilled veggies… yum. I rush to help.

  Jacks deep voice greets me with a big hello and after he set the platter down on the marble counter, he wraps me up in a big hug. It’s nice to be part of a normal Sunday family dinner. Sure, Mom would do her best, but she isn’t the greatest cook and it’s not like we had a father figure in the house or any siblings. When I found out about James I wished and wished he could be part of my family and not my Dad’s. I felt like I loved him more and that my Dad didn’t deserve such a great son.

  “Where is Caroline?” And just as Ben is asking this, she rounds the corner of the open kitchen, with her face in her phone.

  Ben drapes an arm around his sister’s shoulders as she greets me.

  “Oh, Tess,” She shoves her phone in her pocket. “I made you a set of the arm warmers like we talked about last night” She sounds eager. “Come with me to my room and I will get them for you.”

  Caroline opens her bedroom door and strides to the corner where she has a sewing station set up, mannequin and all. Fabric is thrown about, in all different colors, patterns and textures. She picks something up on one of the tables set up in the area and walks back to me. She hands me a set of arm warmers and they look just as we had discussed, black with pinks thrown in, but the pink are little shiny gems and gorgeous. “Caroline, these are beautiful!”

  She beams at me, obviously proud and she should be. Just by looking around the room anyone could clearly see that she has a lot of talent. “Thanks, it really didn’t take much to make them.” And now she is being too modest.

  “Your classmates must beg you for fashion tips.”

  She looks to her feet, “They don’t really get it.”

  “How so?” I ask.

  “I am kind of the odd one, because I don’t wear designer. I want to wear me, so they make comments.” I can see the pain in her eyes and not wanting to bring her down I change to a happier topic.

  “So, you’re going to New York City this winter for a fashion program, huh? That’s exciting!”

  She shrugs, “All depends on if Dad lets me go.” Her brightness begins to fade. “I can understand that he is thinking about my safety and all, but damn it! This is my dream and I will do it! Ben did, even when our father denied the fact that his only son wasn’t going to go on to be a surgeon like himself. Ben still pushed through. Even though that meant he didn’t come around much for about a year or so. He called me and we st
ill talked a lot, but it wasn’t the same.”

  By this point she is sitting on her plush bed and I have joined her. “I know what you mean. My Dad never supported me in my artistic interests either. I got the whole nine yards, ‘it’s not a future, there’s no money in art, yadda yadda…’ And I stopped for a while. I had a hard year, year and a half. Battled with depression and then I found music, which in my opinion is better than therapy, which I did too, and that doc was a total quack.”

  Caroline chuckles, “Yeah, Dad has me seeing someone, but when my father pays them as much as he does… well, they tend to do what they are told to do.”

  I nod. I totally get it. “Well I am sure he will come around and we both know Ben will do whatever it takes to ensure your happiness.”

  We hear a knock on the open door. It’s Ben.

  “Am I interrupting?” he asks.

  Caroline and I answer in unison, “Yes.” And we both giggle. Ben shakes his head in amusement. Oh man, he looks sexy right now. I bite down on my lip and I hope to hell Caroline doesn’t see me, but the nudge on my shoulder tells me that she did. My face goes pink.

  “We are having girl time,” I inform Ben with a stern look. He cannot monopolize all of my time. “Caroline and I are talking.”

  I see his eyes widen, clearly not the response he was looking for.

  “It’s okay… I’ll give you two a moment.” And as she heads for the door, she tells her brother, “Not in my room, okay? Yours is right there.” She points to his bedroom door. His jaw drops, and she is gone.

  “Can you believe her?” Ben asks me in disbelief.

  I can’t help but laugh so hard that I curl into a ball on her bed and die laughing. Ben is next to me in a second and he is over the top of me laughing just as hard. I can feel his tone biceps and chest flex with each deep exhale. “She said not on her bed, Ben.”

  He looks down at me and smirks, “Are you telling me that you want to do it right now? While my family is downstairs, probably waiting for us to come down so we can have dinner?”

  I cover my face in embarrassment. “Crap! Uh, yeah, I guess not.”

  “I am sorry, but when I am this close to you I can’t help but want you, and believe me, I want you right now.” He presses his hardness against my sex and I just about come on the spot.

  I sit up and I bite into his shoulder, making him growl. “After dinner.” I reply by wrapping my legs around his hips and he presses against me once more. “Not here.” I let go, reluctantly. As he leads me out of the purple room, I can’t help but look at his bedroom door. Damn…

  “So, Dad what’s the occasion? You have never grilled.” Ben asks his father through a mouthful of steak.

  “Well, I am in a good mood.”

  Caroline and Gwen both drop their forks, causing a loud sound as they bounced on the porcelain china. “Seriously?” Caroline asks.

  “Seriously.” Jack answers right back. “I have two announcements I would like to make this evening. The first…” He looks to Caroline, “Caroline, I have decided to let you attend the winter program in New York.”

  Caroline screams. No really, she screamed so loud that Ben actually rubbed his ears. And he is used to hearing some screaming…

  Jack continues, “But you have to keep up with school and I will be checking in every day.”

  “That’s fine! Oh thank you, Dad!” She is squealing.

  “Congrats, baby sister!” Ben gushes. “Tess and I will have to come visit you in the big city.”

  My eyes widen and I nearly spit out the sip of wine I was taking. “Really?” This time I scream and everyone laughs.

  “Yes. We will make a weekend out of it,” Ben says, so casually. How can he be so casual about flying across the country to visit one of the places I have always wanted to see? Could I love this man possibly anymore?

  “What’s your next announcement, Dad?” Caroline asks.

  Jack clears his throat and loosens the dark green tie around his neck, then picks up his napkin to wipe his mouth. He stands and walks to the end of the table where Gwen is sitting.

  When he reaches Gwen’s side, he reaches into his pocket.

  Oh. My. God!

  When Jack gets down on one knee I think all three of us girls squeaked! Gwen threw her hands to her mouth, trying to refrain from sobbing.

  “Gwen Sawyer, you have been with me for the past couple of years and you have helped me through the bad times and shared in with the good. You helped me, a single father with a growing teenage girl, who without you would probably be miserable. You are not just a partner; you are my lover, my friend and my confidant. I never thought I would fall for another woman after Jane passed, but I am incredibly blessed to have found you and I believe Jane sent you my way that day at the market. She knew you would be an amazing mother figure for our daughter. This is just right. And I love you with every thread of my body and soul. Will you give me the honor to place this ring upon your finger and become my wife?”

  She pulls her hands from her face starts nodding slowly then she is a blubbering mess, and I think she is saying “Yes yes.”

  “What is that darling?” Jack asks. I can hear a crack in his voice and a smile in his tone.

  “Yes!” she announces so we can all hear. She leans forward in her seat and hugs Jack, who in which grabs her left and slips the massive diamond on her finger. Wow, what a rock!

  Caroline starts to clap and Ben is sitting there in shock not saying anything. I tap his foot with mine under the table, trying to get his to say something to the happy couple, but nothing. I try to get him to look at me, but he just looks down at his plate.

  “Ben?” I whisper, but zip. What is up with him? You would think he would be happy to see his father finally finding someone to love again after all these years. I put my hand on his knee and he flinches. “What’s wrong?” I ask him.

  He looks like he’s about to start crying. I know him well enough to know that he doesn’t like to show weakness in front of anyone, especially his father. “I need some air.” Standing, he excuses himself, and I follow. Jack and Gwen barely notice with their kissing but Caroline takes notice. She follows us to the back deck.

  “Benji? What’s wrong? Aren’t you excited for them?”

  He walks further out to the yard to a large oak tree. He raises a bent arm up to the tree and rests his forehead on it. I look to Caroline. “Give us a sec?” I ask.

  “Of course.”

  I put both of my hands on his waist and I rest my head in the middle of his back, he smells amazing but his muscles are tense.

  “Ben?”

  He slowly starts to turn and when our eyes finally meet he lets out a sob and he drops to his knees, and presses his head into my stomach.

  I drop to my knees as well. We are face to face and I hold his face in my hands and I cannot get over just how beautiful he is, even while it appears his world is being torn apart. I start to kiss each tear that falls from his mocha eyes, which are sparkling in the setting sun. I kiss the corners of his mouth. His eyes close and he takes in a calming breath and lets the tears fall silently.

  “I love you.” At this moment, it’s all I can offer him.

  We finally stand and move to the deck.

  “I’m sorry.”

  “Why?”

  “Because I shouldn’t have broken down like that. Not in front of you. I am supposed to be strong for you and here I am crying like a big baby, over what? Good news?”

  “It was a surprise to us all, Ben. You just didn’t know what to do or say and that’s OK. It’s a big deal and your father moving on in such an official way just threw you off balance.”

  He is silent, thinking for a moment. “I just didn’t ever think he would replace mum.” Simple answer and it says it all. He drops his head into his hands but I quickly stop him, because he needs to see me say this.

  “Just because the one person you loved more than life itself, leaves in the worst way imaginable doesn’t mean the people
left behind have to suffer forever. Your father found a woman he could love, maybe not as much as he loved your mother, but he loves Gwen. You need to accept that, maybe not today or tomorrow but you will someday. You know what it’s like to have a big love of your life hurt you. I know that isn’t remotely close to how things happened for your father, mother and your family, but you know what its like to hurt for a long time and then to find someone.”

  I am not happy bringing Nicole into things. Having to use his cheating ex-whore of a fiancé as an example really burns my ass.

  “I am happy for him. It’s just… hard.”

  “I know, baby.”

  He leans in for what I think is a soft comforting kiss; what I get is full of heat and fire.

  “Ben…” I drag out his name, which of course only drives him on harder. So I try again, “Benjamin…”

  This make his head pop up.

  “You have never called me by my whole name before.”

  “We need to go inside. You have to say something… anything.”

  He takes in a deep breath, stands and looks through the glass door. He sees Jack and Gwen hugging and holding each other, but also looking out to us, waiting for him to get it together. Jack would be the first one to know how Ben operates.

  “Guess now is a better time than never.” We walk in… together.

  Ben and Jack had a good heart to heart. Ben wouldn’t let go of my hand the whole time. He was able to express for the first time apparently just how much he has been hurting about his mother’s death and that he didn’t think his father’s relationship with Gwen was that serious. They agree that Ben was probably in denial and had blinders on. I think this long talk was good for the both of them, to gain a little perspective on each other’s side.

  Caroline was excused for the night to go be with a friend, and to gush and brag about going to New York in just a short few weeks. As we are preparing to leave I remember that I had left my arm warmers up in Caroline’s room.