Carmen

by Nako

  Her voice blared loudly through the speakers.

  She watched the trailer for the first time today with everyone else.

  Carmen told the guy she hired to comb through the footage, “I trust you. See this vision through.”

  He’d done a great job of putting together clips that she’d given him from her mother’s storage.

  Pictures of her family popped up as music played.

  It was a small journey from the beginning to now.

  A masculine scent greeted her nose and gotten closer.

  Sitting next to her was none other than Nehemiah Walker.

  She held her breath, thankful that he’d shown. In spite of.

  Roses were in his hand too.

  Carmen then heard a voice, “Ma?”

  Kniko!

  Her son showed up.

  At this point she could’ve back flipped through the aisle and said to hell with the fashion show.

  “Hey baby,” she croaked, trying her hardest to contain her composure.

  They’d been texting and Facetiming for weeks now. Kniko bypassed Neezy and his mom, then took the seat beside her.

  He hugged her from the side.

  Carmen was at peace.

  She grabbed each of their hands and together, they watched the remaining clips of the trailer.

  It ended with her at her mother’s grave, putting fresh flowers down.

  “I present to you, BLOOMED.”

  Carmen’s voice faded out and Solange’s “Binz” from her latest album, A Seat at The Table played as models filed in one by one.

  It was delightful.

  The show was indeed a success.

  Tomorrow, everyone would be talking about the relaunch of The Showroom.

  After the show, she took a million and one pictures with everyone and even did about seven quick interviews. Mostly, offering powerful one-liners that could be used as headlines and subject titles for the invited bloggers and journalists.

  Nia then asked, “Where to now, mama?” she was ready to celebrate and have a glass of champagne.

  Kniko was chilling with Neezy. It seemed as if they’d introduced themselves to each other.

  “I think I’ma kick back tonight, it’s been a long week y’all,” she regretfully informed them.

  “But thank you so much for coming!” she really appreciated it.

  everyone understood, especially after seeing Kniko.

  Carmen’s heart was full.

  She asked Teka, “Can you take this picture of me really quick?”

  One photo to capture this moment.

  If people only knew how up and down her mood had been these past few weeks without Neezy.

  Lord Jesus.

  He hadn’t said one word to her but that was okay.

  His presence alone brought her comfort.

  “Sure.”

  She called him and her son over to her.

  “Maaaa,” Kniko groaned.

  “Honey hush, it’s one picture.”

  He’d took pictures all night and even posted it on his social media with the caption, “Mommy” and a pink heart emoji.

  If she could’ve liked it a million times she would’ve.

  Carmen stood in the middle and her two men were beside her.

  Neezy lazily wrapped his arm around her waist and she exhaled.

  Hoping that God came through for her.

  She wanted her man back. Needing him for her sanity.

  “One, two, three…cheese!”

  η

  Porter watched East damn near stress himself out at Ramone’s poor performance tonight. He paced the floor. Sat down. Stood up.

  Nigga almost knocked the hot dog out of Porter’s hand.

  “Did the nigga get some pussy last night or something?”

  Ramone was playing horrible.

  East wanted to strangle him.

  He hadn’t had a game this bad…since…

  “What’s up with him tonight?” East literally only spoke to Jordyn at the basketball games. The only thing they had in common was wanting the best for Ramone King. Other than that, she knew to not speak to him.

  Jordyn pursed her lips together and shook her head.

  She tugged on the collar of her shirt to cover her lips because these sneaky ass reporters had a PhD in reading lips.

  “Nas appeal got denied.”

  East didn’t even know he’d tried…again.

  “When?”

  Jordyn sighed, “This morning.”

  Ramone’s hopes were most likely up.

  He missed his daddy.

  The man had been locked up for many years.

  All he wanted was for once…just one fuckin’ time to look over and see his Pops in courtside. Kicking it with his momma.

  Ramone’s game was throwed off.

  He kept fouling the other players and was cursing at the referees.

  Thankfully, coach got the hint and ended up pulling him out of the game.

  Ramone stormed off the hardwood and went home.

  He was MIA for weeks.

  “I don’t know what’s going on with him,” he mumbled under his breath.

  It was now halftime so East sat down again and fished around with the food on the trays that P always ordered.

  “Maybe he’s tired. The kid is damn near carrying the team by his lonesome,” Porter knew how that could be.

  East shook his head, “Nah, it gotta be something else.”

  It had to be his father.

  Nasir was the one sensitive thing in Ramone’s life.

  As far as he knew, he was a single man.

  “When was the last time you talked to the big homie?”

  East already knew who he was referring to.

  “It’s been a minute.”

  He was trying something new.

  P was surprised to hear that, “Word?”

  East knew they were alone in the suite, but he still peered over his shoulder to be sure.

  “I been trying to get myself together. I’m restructuring and for years…I you know…I spent every weekend driving to see him. Answering the phone three, four times a day.”

  P understood where he was coming from.

  “Yeah, I feel you.”

  He did have to keep it real with him, “If my best mans stopped picking up the phone with no explanation… I would feel some type of way.”

  East knew he was right.

  He exhaled, running his hands over his scruffy beard that his wife swore had her feeling all nostalgic lately.

  “How do I tell him?”

  That was what stumbled him.

  He didn’t want it to seem as if he’d turned his back on him.

  Nasir had helped so many niggas.

  Fed so many families….

  No one showed up for him.

  All he had was his kids, East and Lo…

  “You tell him the truth, whatever that may be.”

  East was certain that Nia didn’t tell P his personal business, yet the gaze that he held in his eyes made him feel as if he had a clue.

  “It’s a lot.”

  P nodded his head, “Life gets like that. We’re all human. We find our way though, eventually.”

  Therapy was his saving grace.

  Honesty worked too.

  “I’m going to talk to him. Chop it up and all of that,” he decided.

  Porter smiled, “Good.”

  They ordered another round of beers and hot wings.

  The game resumed and surprisingly, Ramone was able to turn the scoreboard around and they won.

  East clapped happily, “That’s what the hell I’m talking about boy!” he screamed from the top of the arena.

  He could get used to the suite life.

  After the game, he was hyped up and not quite ready to go home.

  He asked Porter, “You wanna go downstairs with me?”

  Shit, P didn’t have anything else to do.

  Both of their wives were out of town and Mah
ogany took the kids with her on a quick turnaround trip.

  “Yeah, cool.”

  They were stopped a million and one times because everyone wanted to dap Porter up and he told him, “Now you see why I don’t sit down here.”

  It was too busy.

  Too extra for him.

  He didn’t come to the games to be seen; he was a sports fanatic.

  Porter enjoyed every sport.

  Basketball, football, soccer, swimming…even tennis.

  Him and Serena were good friends.

  East nodded his head, “I see!”

  Ramone was sitting down in a chair, texting on his phone when East approached him.

  His security was familiar with Uncle E, so they didn’t stop him as they did everyone else.

  “Good game.”

  East let him know.

  Ramone wiped his forehead of the sweat.

  “You must didn’t get the call?” Ramone’s eyes were pained.

  East shook his head.

  “Nah, what call?”

  Ramone sighed, “Pops had a stroke. They are saying he may not make it. I don’t know what the fuck happened.”

  East damn near passed out. Porter and the security guard caught him in the nick of time.

  “You good?”

  Eastland’s heartbeat was thumping loudly against his chest.

  “He’s healthy…he’s in good shape. He not old.”

  He didn’t understand.

  “Lo said he’s been stressed out lately. When was the last time you talked to him?” Ramone felt as if East should’ve known all of this.

  They talked more than anyone.

  η

  “You sure you don’t want us to drop you off? We don’t mind,” Neezy told Kniko for the millionth time.

  Carmen was sitting on the floor Indian-styled, going through old photo books of she and Casey.

  “Kniko, I can take you home in the morning on my way to work.”

  They weren’t comfortable with him being in Uber, but the kid loved it.

  He waved his cell, “It’s two minutes away. Ma, I’m sharing my location with you.” He was used to it.

  Carmen sighed, “Alright, okay.”

  Kniko flung his back pack that served as an overnight bag for the weekend that he spent with his mama over his shoulder.

  “I’m going to walk him out and take a picture of the tag,” Neezy told his girlfriend.

  He slid his feet into a pair of Gucci slides that he kept near the door.

  Carmen loved calling him at the last minute to come help her bring something in the house.

  The shoes served a great purpose.

  “I love you baby,” Carmen blew a kiss from the floor.

  She was cozy and comfortable.

  The relaunch of The Showroom a success. She’d been on a high ever since then. Spending what little free time she now had with her son had been a blissful experience. They had so much in common and a lot to catch up on. He was devastated at the news of his favorite Uncle passing away. He hated that he couldn’t say goodbye.

  Kniko shared tidbits of the conversation he had with his father concerning his paternal parent and luckily, Keiter didn’t disclose a name.

  Carmen was thankful.

  She told him that despite how she felt about Keiter, he was indeed…Kniko’s daddy and the only he would ever know.

  She would never take that away from him.

  So far, Kniko and Neezy got along well.

  Playing video games and eating junk food into the wee hours of the morning.

  Neezy hadn’t said more than two words to her when they were alone yet had put on a great game face in front of her son.

  Now, here they were alone and forced to deal with their issues.

  Jhene Aiko sung lowly in the background, “How did we get away from love?”

  Neezy asked, “Oh yeah? This what you on.”

  As he locked the door behind him and took his shoes off.

  “Is he good?” she questioned, skipping over his sarcasm. Carmen was more concerned with the well-being of her son.

  “Yep.”

  Neezy plopped down on the couch and sparked up a blunt.

  “It went well,” she shared with him.

  he nodded his head, “Yep.”

  He was being dry.

  Carmen removed her reading glasses and closed the photo album.

  She was tired but knew they needed to talk before bed.

  This had to stop. Today.

  “I’m good, no need to give me a long speech, Carm,” he warned her.

  “First of all—"

  She shook her head and leaned over so she could get off the floor.

  She didn’t have time for this shit.

  “I don’t deserve this from you and I’m not going to allow you to continue to make me feel as if I did something wrong. I spent years in a marriage where I always felt like everything was my fault. You don’t get that privilege.”

  She said through clenched teeth.

  He didn’t know what she’d been through. Carmen kept a lot tucked under a shabby rug.

  Neezy stood up as well and grabbed her.

  “You right, you right.”

  He didn’t want to be alone.

  Didn’t want her to leave.

  Carmen jerked away from him, “Nah.”

  She wanted the old, sweet version of him to return. This hood-ass, nonchalant, disturbed side of him wasn’t the man she fell in love with.

  “Can’t wait to see you barefoot and pregnant…yo, you gon’ get on my nerves,” he could envision it now.

  Carmen’s face crumpled.

  “Nehemiah, where did that come from?” she questioned.

  “I bought us a big ass house…we gon’ fill it up with kids,” he shared with her.

  Carmen’s mouth dropped.

  “For real?”

  He nodded his head, “Yeah. Mixed some old money with the new money. Cash purchase.”

  It was his greatest accomplishment to date.

  She ran into his arms, forcing him to pick her thick ass up.

  “OH, MY GOD!”

  She was so proud of him.

  “Wish my brother was here to see that shit…” he muttered.

  Neezy put her down.

  She grabbed his arm and told him, “He’s proud but baby...you gotta be proud of yourself.”

  She spoke only from experience.

  The feeling was bittersweet for him today.

  As he signed the paperwork all he could think about was Money telling him to always take care of their mother.

  He’d failed him.

  “Bae, I need to tell you something.”

  She stared him down.

  Automatically assuming the worse.

  “What?” she was ready for whatever.

  Did he slip up and have sex?

  Got a hoe pregnant?

  STD?

  What did he have to tell her?

  Whatever it was…she was sure they could get through it. She loved him so much…

  She was used to disappointment; familiar with being let down.

  “SIT,” he commanded.

  Carmen did as he instructed and waited on him to tell her whatever was so important.

  “My momma has dementia, I never told you this…I don’t know why either,” he was talking to her although his eyes were on the carpet and his hands were balled up.

  He exhaled loudly, “My brother used to be on me so much…you gotta see about momma…make sure momma remember this and that.”

  He closed his eyes, thinking back to all the times he’d been scolded for not properly taking care of his mother.

  “When I found the house all I could think about…” he was struggling to share this piece of his life with her.

  “I couldn’t stop thinking about my brother telling me that one day...momma was going to live with him again. Once he slowed down in the streets and he was going to have the best doctors, so she won’t be con
fined in one room.”

  “Remember when mommy used to make us them hamburger helper sandwiches?” Money asked his lil’ brother as he stirred the noodles, milk, water and meat.

  Neezy nodded his head, “Yeah, with the potato bread and hot sauce.”

  Money told him “When I stop all this shit. I’ma show her how to cook em.”

  Their mother was in and out these days and with Money being the oldest he had the most time with her. He seemed more affected by the changes her brain was going through.

  Their mom was diagnosed early. She was in her fifties yet, was suffering.

  It started with her leaving the stove on, forgetting where she parked her car at the grocery store and not remembering where she banked at.

  It pained her to tell her son, “I think my memory is leaving me.”

  She didn’t remember herself and that’s when the depression began to sink in.

  They were from the hood. People in the ghetto weren’t discussing dementia or Alzheimer’s so Money took it upon himself to learn all he could.

  He got his momma the best doctor that drug money could buy.

  “Yours be good too. Shit, I’m ready to eat now.”

  Money told him, “Go get ma.”

  Neezy stopped what he was doing to do as his brother asked. He always did.

  Shit, he was damn near his daddy.

  “MA!” Neezy hollered down the hallway.

  “Damn nigga I could’ve did that,” Money scolded.

  Neezy went up the steps and knocked on his mother’s bedroom door.

  She didn’t say anything, so he opened it and there she was.

  With only a bra and a hat on.

  No panties.

  He panicked and then the look on his face told her that she was…wrong.

  “I gotta get to work,” she whispered.

  His momma hadn’t worked in so long.

  “Ma, you don’t have a job.”

  She shook her head and went towards her bed.

  That was when he noticed heaps and mountains of clothes piled high.

  “Bill want me to sing for him tonight, can you help me find my pink polka dot dress. It’s in here somewhere.”

  She was stressing herself out trying to find her lucky dress.

  “Ma, where are your underwear?” he asked her slowly.

  His mom looked down at her exposed kitty.

  “Oh my,” she was embarrassed.

  Neezy hurried to her dresser.

  “it’s okay, I got em’ for you.”