by Lylah James
We stopped in the middle of the clearing, surrounded by flowers.
Alessio knelt down in front of me and removed my sandals. “You love to be barefooted here.”
“Thank you,” I murmured when he stood up.
He stepped back and walked toward the flowing water. I remembered this.
Closing my eyes, I let the memories take over my mind. My heart felt lighter, and I breathed in the fresh air.
My eyes opened when I got closer to the water. I looked back at Alessio. His arms were crossed over his chest as he stared at me.
My gaze moved back toward the water. I stepped forward, my feet making contact with the chilling, rushing water. I shivered as I walked ankle deep.
I felt the rushing water against my feet and closed my eyes, letting this new feeling wash over me.
I didn’t hurt.
It felt nice…I felt content.
When I felt an arm around my waist, I leaned back against Alessio’s chest.
“May I have this dance, Angel?”
My eyes snapped opened.
May I have this dance, Angel?
We had done this before. I turned in his arms, and Alessio pulled us out of the room. My feet dug into the grass as I stared into his eyes.
“I don’t know how to dance,” I muttered, completely lost in his gaze.
Alessio chuckled. “Neither do I.”
He brought my hands to his shoulders and wrapped his around my waist.
And then we moved. We glided across the field, and with each step, my chest felt fuller.
My stomach rolled and twisted. My heart drummed just a little faster.
We never once broke eye contact.
We were lost in each other.
Alessio gathered me even closer to him, his arms tight around me.
In that moment, all I felt was peace. I felt protected. Safe.
He was my lifeline.
And I knew, as long as my savior was with me, I was safe.
Chapter 13
I was sitting on the bed waiting for my Alessio. My hand was on my round stomach, feeling the baby move.
The door opened, and Alessio walked out of the bathroom. His towel was around his shoulders as he dried his hair. His chest was bare; he wore only black sweatpants.
Alessio caught my eyes and smiled. “Why don’t you go and wait for me in the piano room?”
I nodded and got up. Alessio placed a quick kiss on my lips as I walked out of the room. I stood in front of the piano room.
Taking a deep breath, I walked inside. The piano was the first thing I saw. Feeling excited, my body hummed in response.
Since I started playing some days ago, Alessio and I never missed a night.
Playing made me feel at peace, and I wanted to bask in the warmth of Alessio’s stares.
Walking further into the room, I stopped beside Alessio’s couch. A small sigh escaped my lips as I waited for Alessio.
As I was looking down, something else entirely caught my eyes.
My gaze shifted toward the couch beside Alessio’s, and I took a step toward it. My breath froze in my throat.
I took another step, stopping right in front of the couch.
The scene, right here, felt so familiar.
Even through the shock, my eyes didn’t lose focus on the sight in front of me.
A single white flower lay on the seat.
It looked so soft and delicate. Reaching out, I took the flower in my hand and brought it to my chest.
I was right. It was soft and delicate. The petals were open, and it looked absolutely beautiful.
Did Alessio leave this flower for me?
I couldn’t help but smile. Of course he would.
He was so sweet.
I held the flower close to my racing heart and closed my eyes.
My stomach flipped, and it felt like my heart was dancing.
“I can safely assume that you love the peony.”
My eyes widened at Alessio’s voice, and I turned around, facing him. He was leaning against the door, regarding me with curious yet adoring eyes.
His head was cocked to the side, and the corner of his mouth was stretched up in a half smile.
My cheeks burned, and I looked down. “I love it,” I replied softly. “It’s really beautiful.”
Alessio walked closer and stopped in front of me. He tilted my chin up so our gazes met. His was filled with warmth. His eyes shifted to my lips, and I licked them nervously.
He moved even closer, until our chests brushed together. I sucked in a deep breath and waited for him move.
“I’m going to kiss you,” he murmured, his gaze moving back to my lips.
“Okay,” I whispered back.
As soon as the words were out of my mouth, a flash of pain went through my skull. I winced, my fingers tightening around the flower.
Memories after memories flashed behind my closed eyes.
I couldn’t stop them. They kept coming without a pause. So much. Too much at the same time. My head felt like it was going to explode.
My heart raced as each memory made its way into my thoughts.
Another wave of pain crashed through me. It was crippling, and I dropped the flower, my hands going to my head.
I dug my fingers in my head, the world spinning around me.
No. No. No. No.
Stop!
It hurt. It hurt so much.
“Ayla!” I heard a voice calling out my name.
Alessio. He was calling for me.
I tried to respond, but my tongue felt heavy. My lips parted, but instead a wounded cry left my mouth.
My throat closed up, and I rubbed at my neck furiously, trying to fight for my next breath.
My knees buckled, but an arm caught me. “Ayla! Fuck.”
My head pounded as I sank into oblivion.
This. This was why I didn’t want to remember.
The pain. It felt like my heart was being wrenched open. I was bleeding. From the inside, I was being cut open.
I would never forget the pain. I wanted to forget; I wanted to be numb.
But it was too late now.
I had remembered, and now I had to live with those memories.
Chapter 14
My head ached as my eyes slowly opened. I felt heavy. I blinked my eyes open, trying to understand what just happened.
I focused on the ceiling, my head a little fuzzy.
“Ayla?”
At the sound of my name, I turned my head toward the voice. My eyes made contact with blues one.
Alessio!
My heart stuttered, and I let out a choked cry. I remembered everything. Every moment. Every word he said. And everything after.
Alberto.
My eyes widened, and I sat up quickly. There was no escaping him.
“Shhh…I’m right here, Angel,” Alessio soothed. He held my hands in his as he tried to smile. He looked worried, and I saw the fear in his eyes.
I couldn’t stop the tears. Alessio found me. He was here. He was really here.
He saved me…
I was safe.
He took me away from hell.
My heart soared, and I quickly scrambled into his lap. “Alessio,” I sobbed, wrapping my arms around him.
Burying my face in his neck, I cried. I had believed in Alessio. I had trusted him.
For once, I was happy that I never lost hope.
No matter what, I knew he would come for me.
My heart soared, and I held him tighter. I never wanted to let go.
I would never let go. He was mine as much as I was his. The day our eyes met, our fate had been decided.
“I got you, Angel.”
Those words. His voice. It had the same effect on my heart just as before. His voice was exactly what I needed to hear.
And those words…I had been desperate for them.
I knew he got me. He always did.
Alessio held me against him, and he whispered sweet words in my
ears, letting me know he was here.
He placed gentle kisses over my face, soothing away all the pain.
“Alessio,” I whispered brokenly. “I remember, Alessio.”
His arms tightened around my waist. His lips pressed against my temple. “You remember?” he asked hoarsely.
I could hear the emotion in his voice. His hands were shaking on my hips, and I held him tighter. I nodded against his neck. “I remember everything.”
Alessio pulled away so he could stare at me. His eyes roamed over my face and then stared deep into my eyes. I saw the glassy look in his.
“You really remember?” he asked again, his soft voice caressing me.
When I nodded, Alessio crushed me to his chest. “Ayla. Fuck. I was worried. So scared. I thought…you would never…”
“You found me,” I hiccupped back a sob.
“I found you. I will always find you, Angel,” he agreed. I looked up, staring into his captivating blue eyes.
“Alessio, I’m not the traitor.”
His hand pressed against my lips, stopping my flow of words. “No. You are not. I know you aren’t. I never thought you were. I trusted you before, and I trust you now.”
“You believe me? But…before…at the beach…”
Alessio flinched at the memory, and even I felt a sharp pain in my chest.
“I was hurt, Ayla. I just found out the woman I desperately love was an Abandonato. I was just angry, but never once did I think you were the spy. I just needed some time alone. When I had time to think, I understood why you didn’t say anything,” he explained.
I saw him swallow hard. He bent his head until our foreheads were touching. “I didn’t turn away from you because you were an Abandonato. I turned away because I was hurt that you lied. When I finally came to terms with everything, I was too late. You were already gone. I ran after you, but I was still too late. Ayla, that day…I had never felt such pain. It felt like I was being torn apart.”
My throat closed up. “I fought, Alessio. I fought against him. I didn’t go easily. I screamed for you. He said…he said that you didn’t want to see me. He said you were giving me away.”
Alessio’s expression thundered with fury. “Who?” he growled. But I saw a hint of recognition in his eyes.
“Artur,” I whispered. “He gave me to Alberto. He said you never wanted…to see me again.”
When his face twisted in pain, I quickly added, “But I didn’t believe him.”
Alessio pressed his lips ever so gently on mine. The kiss was so soft, almost feather light. I could taste our tears as our lips made contact.
“I never said those words, Angel. You are my everything. I would never think of giving you away,” he admitted, his voice filled with distress.
“I know. I believed in us, Alessio,” I said, wrapping my arms around his head. I held him to me, our lips still touching.
“I believed in us, too. I never stopped believing.”
At his words, my heart raced. My chest didn’t feel like it would explode anything. I felt…lighter.
“You kept me from going crazy,” I muttered, closing my eyes as he peppered my face with kisses.
Alessio wrapped his arms around me, and we held each other. I sighed and burrowed deeper into his safe embrace. I felt loved…cherished…adored and protected.
I felt his cheek in my palm, feeling his rough stubble. When was the last time he shaved? My hands roamed over his face, touching him, feeling him.
I ran my fingers over his lips, and he kissed my fingertips. I closed my eyes as a loving feeling washed over me.
I sat up straighter on his lap and kissed his lips. I never wanted to stop touching him.
But my thoughts halted when I felt a kick. Looking down, I stared at my round stomach. I felt Alessio follow my gaze.
My nose stung as I fought against the tears.
When I felt another kick, it was impossible. I cried, holding my stomach, feeling my baby move.
Alessio placed his hand over mine. We held the bump firmly, protectively.
“He hurt me, Alessio,” I whispered. “He hurt me so much. He kept going. It didn’t matter that I cried and begged him to stop. He just…kept going. He kept hurting me. Over and over again,” I cried, my hands pressing firmly against my stomach.
The tears streamed down my cheeks as the baby moved again. Oh, baby.
I pressed my face into Alessio’s neck. “He was so cruel. He never stopped, Alessio. I don’t know how long it kept going. I just didn’t have the strength…to fight anymore. I just…wanted it all…to go away. I just wanted…to be happy. I wanted to be…with you again.”
“Angel,” Alessio groaned in pain. He held me tighter as I felt the anger course through him.
When the baby rolled again, I closed my eyes. “He said he would kill…my baby.”
Alessio froze underneath me. His muscles tightened. I thought he stopped breathing for a second. “What?”
His tone was dangerous. Even I trembled at his voice.
My heart ached at the memory. Alberto was ruthless. He tried to break me every way he could. He took me until I had nothing else to give. Still, he kept taking. He kept breaking me.
As if his actions weren’t enough, he tried to break me with his words.
“He said he would let me give birth but…deliver the dead baby to you,” I choked out, my breathing coming out faster in panic.
Alessio’s arm curved protectively around my stomach. “He’s a dead man, Ayla. When I find him, he will regret ever hurting you. He will regret even thinking of hurting our baby.”
My eyes snapped open, my breath leaving me in a loud whoosh.
He will regret even thinking of hurting our baby.
Our baby.
My heart clenched, and I looked up at his angry face. I saw the killer there. The Monster. But I wasn’t scared. I knew the Monster would protect me.
He was my Monster.
I palmed his cheeks, looking into his blue eyes. “You said our baby.”
Alessio’s eyebrows furrowed at my words. His gaze shifted to my stomach and then back up. “Yes. Our baby.”
I swallowed past the lump in my throat. “How do you know the baby is yours?”
Alessio brought his hand up and swiped my tears away. “Is it? Is the baby mine, Ayla?”
I winced at the question, a sense of despair falling over me. Closing my eyes, I leaned my forehead against his. “I don’t know,” I whispered. My voice broke as the baby moved again. “I don’t know. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, Alessio.”
“Why are you apologizing, Angel?”
When I went to answer, he pressed his fingers against my lips, stopping my tide of words. “Not a word, Ayla. You have nothing to apologize for. At this point, I don’t even care who the father is. The baby is mine. You are mine. He is ours. That’s all that matters.”
His hand went to my round belly. He caressed the bump gently. “I think I already love him, Angel.”
My hand went over his. “I want him, Alessio.”
A surge of protectiveness and possessiveness coursed through me.
I didn’t know who the father of my baby was. I didn’t want to know. I just wanted to love my baby.
I wanted to give my baby all the love I never had.
Alessio pressed his lips to mine again. He kissed me with so much care and love, like he treasured me. He held me gently, as if I were made of glass.
I felt cherished.
His touch was soft and gentle. His words were sweet.
He was everything I needed and wanted.
I love you.
The words were stuck in my throat. I didn’t say them. I wanted to, but something stopped me.
He told me he loved me, yet I couldn’t say the words. I didn’t know why.
I didn’t think I needed to say them anyway. What we had was more powerful than those words. We just had to feel our love for each other.
Even without those words, our hearts were e
ntwined together.
“Alessio,” I said quietly. “You are my peace.”
He smiled against my lips. “I know.”
His answer brought a smile to my own lips. We kissed, our lips touching softly. It was slow, gentle, and soft. His tongue mated with mine, and I sighed into his kiss.
A knock on the door broke us apart. Before Alessio could answer, I saw Maddie running inside, followed by Lena.
She stopped in the middle of the room, her eyes on mine. “Sam told me Ayla fainted.”
Her gaze roamed over me, fear in her eyes. Lena stopped beside her, her expression panicked too.
Alessio chuckled lightly. “She remembers,” he announced.
Maddie’s mouth fell open, and Lena gasped. Before I knew it, I was swept in their arms. They hugged me too tight. We cried together.
I missed them so much.
“I’m sorry for taking so long,” I breathed through my tears.
“You have come back to us. That’s all that matters,” Lena admonished gently.
Maddie didn’t let me go for the longest time. Lena had long left, but Maddie still held me. “I was so scared, Ayla. You have no idea. I’m so happy. I feel like every sacrifice I made was worth it.”
My forehead pinched in confusion, and I stared at Alessio’s blank eyes. Maddie paused and pulled away. She swiped her tears away and smiled, her eyes twinkling merrily.
“What are you talking about?” I asked, confused.
She shook her head. “Don’t worry about it. You sure know how to stress someone out. By the way, I am still a little pissed that you talked to me last. Not fair that Alessio got your voice first.”
I ducked my head shyly, feeling my heart warm with her words.
“Ayla needs to rest. You can talk to her tomorrow, Maddie,” Alessio said, pulling me into his arms. My back was to his front as he held me.
Maddie nodded. “You’re right.”
She kissed me on the forehead before pulling away. “You need to rest and sleep a lot. I’m sure remembering everything has taken a toll on you.”
“I do feel a little weak,” I admitted, relaxing in Alessio’s arms.
“That’s it,” he growled, sweeping me off my feet. “I should have known.”
He placed me on the bed and pulled the comforter over me. “You need to rest,” he ordered, leveling me with a hard look.