Ashes To Ashes (Wolf Guard Book 2)

by Roxanne Lee

  I smiled like some crazy fool. I wasn't normally so sentimental, he did have a way of kicking me right in the heart though - in his own odd little way.

  He bent his head and started trailing his own teasing kisses to my neck, following his determined path across my shoulder and collarbone, his destination blatantly obvious when little rumbles left his chest as he neared my breasts. I chuckled when he seemed reluctant to move any further south and ran my hand through his hair. "I'm okay right here."

  He closed his mouth around one nipple and seemed adamant he wasn't letting go. I spread fingers over his shoulders, tracing fading bruises and claw marks from Conall's vengeful wolf - I don't suppose he'd been particularly happy about the nerve damage his hand would be suffering for hours to come.

  Lane's lips left my breast for a moment and I unconsciously lifted my chest to follow that mouth.

  "You'll dream of...me tonight."

  I nodded in response. I wasn't looking forward to it - I didn't want to see that village he'd spoken of, didn't want to watch as he wasted away.

  He swallowed loudly, "Don't want you to see...what I've done. If you see that night...your parents, I'm sorry."

  I shook my head at his worried face. "Couldn't get rid of me now if you tried."

  His smile lit the darkened room, so bright it seemed the sun had chased away the clouds. And then it turned a little unnerving, teeth that gleamed a guarantee. "I'm going to...eat you, witch. Get my fill of peaches."

  Silly wolf. Thinking I'd run from that promise.

  "Pirate?"

  The voice shoved me out of memories, taking the dreams I wanted to stay in and forcing me back to reality. I turned from my vantage point, catching a glimpse of rough male that filled the doorway, before settling my eyes once more on the outside. Watching females as they walked the forest line, children that played their last game in the fading sun. Guards that I knew traveled the grounds outside the wall, even if I’d yet to spot them.The night drew so close, even the stars made their first attempts to brighten the sky. My breath fogged the window, standing too close to the glass and leaving smears for someone else to polish away.

  "Yer have tae move from there some time."

  Nope. Didn't have to go anywhere but right here.

  "Women need some help, roof collapsed on one of their houses. Not much of a fixin' man myself, should probably call someone out fer it."

  So he can take the time to tell me but not to make the call himself? Idiot wolf.

  "Need a new doctor, last one died in the battle wit' Duncan's mutants. Should call Kendrick - he has two, greedy bastard."

  I shrugged, keeping my gaze firmly fixed on the gate that led to the driveway.

  "You're the Alpha fer the time bein'. It's what dat bite mark says."

  Couldn't he see I was busy right now?

  Conall sighed behind me, his frustration leaking out until I felt it beating down on my head. "You're an arsehole."

  I blinked at the window in front of me, a short, shocked breath escaping. I whipped my head around and stared at the large man inching his way into the office.

  "What? You're bein' an arsehole. Charlie's out lookin', not helpin' much by standin' around starin' into space."

  I huffed back at him and kicked the chair next to me, sending it flying across the carpeted floor. "I fed from him, Conall. What if I’ve made him so weak, he couldn't defend himself?"

  Conall rolled his eyes at me. "He looked pretty feckin' happy the morning he left. I tink yer gave him a decent send off."

  I blushed. Partly anger and partly the embarrassment I'm sure he was going for.

  "They'll find him, little pirate. He's a big wolf wit' a big head. Takes a lot to knock it off - trust me, I've tried."

  I huffed at Conall, wanting nothing more than to sink back into my thoughts and all I'd seen since the day he'd left, nearly a full week ago. He'd been right - I'd seen every one of the moments that had made Lane the man he was today. The bond pulled the memories and the empath pulled the feelings, like surround sound dreams that swallowed me whole in their story. I saw the young, skinny boy left to wander the woods alone, no sign of the pack or family he must have belonged to. Saw the rush of relief that had built instantly on his face, the second those people had come into view - so sure he’d never be alone again. Saw the terror he tried so hard to hide, a boy who wished himself a man, only so he could have the strength to fight the creatures who'd found him. The years that had turned that boy into some misshapen caricature of the original, bones that pushed through the skin with hunger, eyes that burned wild with fear masking itself as rage. The wolf that forced itself into existence, some glorious angel that had crawled its way through hell to emerge demon. His crazed fight with Carver and Duncan as they released him from that pole, so distorted in his own mind, he'd not understood the wolves were giving him freedom.

  Katherine came next - Carver’s mother. A woman who wiped away the dirt and given him food and water. One who'd sat on the floor outside the cell they’d been forced to keep him in, her pristine white trousers staining in the grass, and sung to him until he'd fallen asleep. A woman that, even in his wildest state, he couldn't bring himself to take a swipe at. How she'd washed his hair for him day after day because he couldn't stand the thought of that crawling itch that never seemed to leave him. How she'd refused to allow him to stay quiet and forced him to open his mouth and speak, even if it hurt. How she slowly went from Katherine to mother, even if it was just in his own mind.

  His greatest ever accomplishment, was winning a place in Carver's guard. The boy who'd been forgotten, had grown to a wolf impossible to forget. His relationship with Duncan had been unusual. Even though he'd seen Carver as a brother, the Scot spoke a bond to his wolf. Called a silent tune for the animal to respond in kind, some tether that held the two together as thickly as steel.

  The years of revenge fell swiftly, some never ending cycle of blood. The rage in the wolf giving a picture of anger the man had only barely felt. Allowing the animal to take his vengeance, giving the man his freedom. The wolf remembered that fateful night, the moment he saw a young girl. The urge to release her into the dark and away from the beast he'd become. I saw the redhead standing in the shadows, eyes covered by gloom, watching the amber eyed animal stop in his tracks and chase the little female away.

  His fight with Arya was a flickering moment, one that stood out in colour. To find another wolf that moved on the same tumultuous wave as him, who fell slightly on the other side of normal, and spent an inordinate amount of time dreaming in blood. The betrayal of Duncan burned the wolf inside, had him bashing his cage for a taste of his submission and roaring his wrath to the moon. The man was less bothered, only troubled for the ruination he hadn't foreseen.

  The moment he saw me was surprising. I'd imagined hate for the feeder I housed, anger for the fate that played with him. His first thoughts were basic - I was pretty and he wanted a taste. After that it wasn't so much the feeder he hated, more himself for being unable to think past the creatures that broke him. The moment he became mine was the moment I marked the wolf with empath - he saw I was just as shiny on the inside, as I was on the outside.

  I shook my head and balled my fist up, pushing it into my gut and the ache that had started within a day of him leaving. "It doesn't feel right, something's off."

  Conall moved further into the room, leaning his bulk against the table, watching me carefully as I rubbed that ache away. "Give Charlie one more day. He can't find him, we'll take your brother and track him ourselves. Leave Carver tae look after this place."

  I sighed gratefully. I could not stop the overwhelming panic from trying to take over and smother both the human and the wolf. She danced around in constant agitation, annoyed that I'd dismissed her warnings so far.

  "In the meantime, please go deal wit' the females. Arya's been doin' it, " he grimaced. "She is not a people person."

  I smiled lightly, imagining Arya's idea of interacting with the pac
k, and sighed. "Okay, I can do that."

  Conall grinned and pushed himself off the desk, his wolf flashing obsidian eyes through his normal green. "Like tae taste a little Scot's meat, been a while since I had me some of that."

  I screwed my nose up at him. "You're a little disturbed, Irish."

  "Aye." He seemed perfectly content with my observation.

  Silence became my newest friend.

  I hated most of these women, despised their learned nature to vilify anything that was different. I found diplomacy in my silence though - the ability to ignore all that was wrong with their ideals and encourage what traditions were better. Arya would sit in the corner, snorting at most of the females venturing into the office, her wolf close enough to the surface to leave the weaker ones trembling their way out of the room. I quickly came to the same conclusion as Conall, and gave her the telephone to handle instead.

  She did manage to secure a new doctor to arrive within weeks - her conversation with Kendrick consisting of the reply, "I'm pregnant and I'm crazy, do not fuck with me." His laughter boomed through the line at her words and we both wondered on the state of his sanity to find the threatening female so funny. We missed the presence of Tessa, a softness neither of us owned, and sank into duty that rubbed rather than blended.

  The day passed quickly, something I could appreciate. It had been one long torturous wait, with only the wolf to scratch at my insides. Pushing the human to find the blond man, the one that housed her counterpart.

  I watched the sky darken to midnight and lighten once more to dawn. Counting down the stars until morning, and my first glimpse of a Spring reborn.

  Falling into stillness, just for this one final day.

  Chapter 31

  "I'll be leaving, once we get your Alpha back."

  I stopped cold. The leaves crumbling beneath my feet and disturbing the otherwise sleepy forest. "No. No you're not."

  He gave me his half smile - the one that said he'd already made his mind up. "Don't need me anymore, Sash. Got your own life here."

  I shook my head until my hair flew across my face. "I'll always need you, what the hell are you talking about?"

  He turned to face me, leaving Conall walk on ahead, a little bit of false privacy when the Irish wolf had such big ears. "We've had a long road, it's about time we get to the end. You've got yours here, and I think I need to find my own."

  But I'd always had him. Like one solid wall to lean on or a hand to pick me up. "I don't want you to leave, Ty."

  He put an arm around my shoulder and tugged me forward until I fell into step once more. "You're not mine anymore, Sash. Not mine to look after and not mine to fight with." He squeezed my shoulder tightly, "someone else has that job now."

  "Doesn't mean you can't stay too." I struggled to find something to say that would change his mind.

  "Actually, it kinda does. I don't have to worry about you anymore - you're safe. Couldn't be much safer with these crazy beasts." He chuckled lightly, "I want to find my own end, Sash. It's about time I tried."

  I started to feel a little sick, "I'm sorry - If I kept you with me." I couldn't stand the thought that he'd stayed with me only so I wouldn't be alone.

  He squeezed me harder. "Shut up, moron. You know I love you. When you're not being a prick anyway."

  I snorted out a laugh at him.

  Ty ruffled my hair into some huge mess. "I just want the same as you have, that's all."

  I grinned at him and stretched on tiptoes to ruffle his into a similar disarray. "Still don't want you to go. But, I guess I understand why you have to." I punched him hard in the stomach, smiling when he coughed out a groan. "Always be a place for you here though, just you remember that."

  Conall's muffled calls interrupted from a good half mile in the distance. He'd changed to wolf the moment we'd stepped into the forest, preferring to travel as beast and sink deeply into the senses of the animal. Charlie had not returned. He'd left a day after Lane, following his tracks while still allowing him the space to appear alone. We'd managed to lose both males, and I had lost my patience. I'd started in this direction only because the wolf urged it, like a push to move my body a certain way. I figured I'd listen to the animal that always seemed to know everything before the human did. We'd run the first hundred miles, starting out early this morning, using the speed that the beast lent to our legs.

  "Think Irish is trying to get our attention. Sounds a bit like lassie to me."

  I thumped Ty in the stomach again. "Just trying to get your head bitten off aren't you? Come on, let's see what he's got."

  I pulled him in the direction of Conall's rumbling wolf, narrowing down the source from the bounce of the echo. The mid morning sun beat heavy on the wind, a glaring stream that burnt a path through thicker wood. Flashes of blue sky turned green to blend with budding leaves, that yellow flame a conqueror of everything under its eye.

  I smelt blood as Conall's black wolf shifted uneasily among the trees, a pacing beast that waited impatiently on humans. He turned a massive, broad head our way and grunted at a body sprawled at the foot of a trunk, chest slumped almost entirely forward to his knees. Black clothes covered most of the form, ripped in parts from marks suspiciously close to claws. Chocolate brown hair swept haphazardly across a sweating forehead, a system that burned as it healed. Panting breath that wheezed as it drew in air. I knelt on the ground beside him and brushed some of that heavy hair out of his face.

  "What happened, Charlie?"

  He grimaced as he tried to raise his body off the floor, pulling at a wound in his chest that looked an awful lot like it went straight through. "Keep getting stabbed in the back, that's what happened - it's getting real irritating."

  Ty stepped around my legs to stand over Charlie. "You're not healing all that well by the looks of it. Any reason why?" His question was spoken as if he already knew the answer.

  Charlie only held Ty's stare with one of his own. "It's a big hole."

  Ty snorted and turned away to Conall. "What do you think, Irish. You happy to give him some juice?"

  The big wolf grumbled, but took a step forward in acceptance, until Charlie's shaking head stopped any further motion. "Don't need it."

  Ty rolled his eyes. "Yeah, cause you're doing so well all by yourself."

  The guard rose to his feet, face stonily tight as he hid his obvious pain. "Can't take what he'll need," he wheezed into the twittering forest.

  I grabbed his arm and helped him steady himself on his feet. "How'd you get that hole, Charlie?"

  He lent back against the tree and closed his eyes, creased at the corners from holding that firm expression so tightly. " Caught up to Lane two days ago, followed a few miles behind him, hidden in the trees. Saw Duncan coming from the east, his creations following at his feet. Twenty or so mutts that caused enough noise, he'd have known it was impossible for him to move quietly. Still he kept coming. I pulled ahead, to come around behind them, start picking them off one by one the closer they got. I killed half of them before he saw me, and ran full out for Lane, sending the rest of the mutts back for me."

  I felt a quiver in my stomach, knowing he was about to tell me where my wolf was, and why he'd never returned.

  "They fought. Both changed to wolf and drew blood quickly. Lane went for the throat while Duncan went for everything but. He wanted him," Charlie's eyes flicked to mine. "He wasn't here to kill him."

  I'd already known that. The redhead was out for Lane to join him, he'd have done everything not to make that killing blow. I wanted to know why he needed him so badly, just what the Scot thought Lane could give him.

  "Lane had Duncan's throat in his jaws - a second from taking his head off, when the women turned up."

  I screwed my eyebrows together and fidgeted on the spot while Charlie caught his breath for a moment.

  "Female wolf on two legs and, something else - not animal and not feeder. Human form with long white hair, pretty girl with pale blue eyes. She carried chains that
the wolf wouldn't touch. Black chains I know I've seen before."

  Conall's sudden roaring wolf caused all of us to jump. A monstrous sound that had us looking for the enemy in the barren wood. He turned to the tree next to him and proceeded to swipe his claws through the trunk, demolishing the bark in seconds, to shavings that piled at his feet. His continuous, thunderous growls turned the birds quietly tweeting in the branches above, to scattered prey fleeing the monster below.

  Ty sighed next to me. "It was only a matter of time, man's got crazy written all over him."