The Hot Brother (Romance Love Story) (Hargrave Brothers - Book #5)

by Alexa Davis

  I couldn’t argue with her assessment of him. I thought he was an asshole most of the time, too. “What did he say?”

  “He can’t wrap his head around the fact that I’m a grown woman and capable of making my own decisions – and even my own mistakes. It’s nobody’s choice but my own.”

  I was the one that tensed now. All I really heard her say was “mistake.” I turned her so she was facing me. “You think I’m going to turn out to be a mistake, Karli?”

  “No! Of course I don’t think that. I didn’t mean you. Dad just makes me crazy sometimes. When telling me what to do wasn’t working, he started telling me that I’m messing you up. He says you’re too close to your title fight to get involved in a relationship and basically, if you lost, it would be my fault.”

  “It kind of sounded like he was also saying something about you picking losers just to get at him.”

  There was a flicker of something in her eyes and I wished I knew her better. I wished that I could read her. “You were listening.”

  “I just heard the end of the conversation. But it does kind of make me wonder.”

  “It makes you wonder? Are you fucking kidding me? You chased me, Nick. You were the one that wouldn’t leave me alone. I finally embrace my feelings for you, and now you’re going to run scared on me?”

  “I’m not running, Karli. We’re just talking. Why are you getting so defensive?” The real question here was what the fuck was I doing? I’d just spent the last three hours having the most fun out of bed I’d ever had with a woman. Why was I trying to screw that up?

  She put her hands on her hips and as I looked at her, my inner voices were dueling with one another. One of them wanted her badly enough to tell me to shut the fuck up. It was telling me, “You’re steps away from having this sexy woman back in your bed and you’re overthinking it. You don’t overthink things. You’re practically famous for your impulsivity. Hell, you barely think it over once before you do it. What the fuck are you doing?

  The other voice was telling me I was making a fool of myself. Karli thought of me as Peter Pan, a boy in a man’s body, and I was the expert on doing things to piss Dad off… Is that what she sees in me? Is she using me to somehow get back at Charlie for this crap with Kevin?

  “I’m defensive? I guess maybe you’re right. I am. It’s because I don’t understand where this is coming from. We had a great time tonight, didn’t we? I thought things were going well and then…what is it, Nick? What’s going on in your head?”

  I tried to stop myself but again, I couldn’t. “Is this…” I motioned my arm between her and me. “Us…are we about pissing off Charlie?”

  “Excuse me? Please, tell me you’re kidding.”

  “You told me that you didn’t date fighters and gym rats any longer. Why the sudden about face? I should have asked you then, that day…but I was just so thrilled that you wanted me that I was blinded by that.”

  “And suddenly, you’re not any longer? Why is that, Nick? Is it because the thrill of the chase is over and now you’re feeling a little claustrophobic and you’re ready to move on?”

  “No, that’s not it at all.” Is it? I really didn’t fucking know. It was like I was in such a panic mode all of a sudden that I had no control over what was coming out of my mouth. “You sat there and watched my fight, and then you watched the groupies swarm all over me. Nothing changed between the night before when you gave me an absolute, unequivocal no and that afternoon when all of a sudden you wanted to be with me…except that maybe you were a little more pissed off at Charlie.”

  There was fire in her hazel eyes all of a sudden. “I don’t do things just to piss my father off, Nick. I’m a little more mature than that. From what I hear, that’s your specialty.”

  “Is that what Ethan told you?” Now I was jealous of my brother and angry with him all over again. Jesus, what is wrong with me?

  “No. You told me that yourself. Ethan is too much of a gentleman to gossip about you behind your back. As a matter of fact, he sang your praises to me, and that’s part of why I decided to go out with you. I trust him.”

  “Oh, you trust him, but not me.”

  “I’m going home.” She picked up her bag off the counter next to the uneaten Chinese food. I should have left it at that, but I felt compelled to make it even worse. She was almost to the door when I said, “I have one more question.”

  “I can’t wait to hear it,” she said, sarcastically.

  “Why Peter Pan? Do you think I’m never going to grow up?”

  “Jesus, Nick, it’s only a song.”

  I raised an eyebrow. “Why did you pick it?” She was silent for a long time and then she said,

  “Because I guess I knew all along that you were going to fly away as soon as you could.”

  I watched her slam the door behind her. Only then did I let myself process the fact that I’d pushed away the only good thing in my life and for no fucking reason other than I was afraid.

  I was afraid that in a matter of weeks, a woman came along and not only changed the way I felt about things, but the way I did things, as well. I was afraid that my life was going to change…and that was as stupid as fuck. My life sucked. Why the hell wouldn’t I want it to change?

  CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR

  KARLI

  It was a long ass week and by Friday night, my head wouldn’t stop throbbing. I couldn’t quiet my thoughts, no matter how hard I tried.

  Tuesday night when I left Nick’s house, I was furious with him. By Wednesday, my heart hurt so badly that I was afraid I’d break down in tears at the sight of him, so I told Dad I was sick and couldn’t go into work. I could tell he wanted to question it, but since he was already on my shit list because he fucked Kevin’s mother and denied his own son for nineteen years, he must have decided that it wasn’t a good idea. He just kissed my forehead, then told me to get some rest and call him if I needed anything.

  Once he went to the gym, I finally let myself have a good cry. I told myself that was it, I wasn’t going to waste any more tears on Nick, but I knew I’d be dangling on the edge at least for a while.

  Thursday, I had class all day, so I didn’t go into the gym at all, and Friday, I went in the wee hours of the morning and took care of business before Nick got there.

  He didn’t try to call or text, and I tried to convince myself that was a good thing, but I was losing that battle, too.

  I got lucky in the fact that Michaela’s dad had her working at the resort nearly every night, helping get ready for their big, annual Halloween bash, so I didn’t have to explain it to her yet. I had no idea how to explain it. I wasn’t even sure what had happened myself. Last time I had talked to her on the phone, she could tell that something was wrong and asked about it, but I told her the same thing I’d been telling Dad – I just wasn’t feeling well.

  Kevin came by to see me a couple of days when Dad was at work. I think I felt sorrier for him than I did for myself. He wasn’t going into the gym at all. Dad continued to refuse to acknowledge him as his son and as much as I was pissed off about that, Kevin was hurt. He was also stressed out. He was lying to his parents and told me that Nick had been snapping his head off over every little thing, so he felt like he was just in the way there. I didn’t have any good advice for him. I’d been a big sister for about five minutes, and I was already failing miserably.

  After cleaning the gym and taking care of a few bills at the crack of dawn on Friday, I had classes until noon. When I left school, all I could think about was taking a long nap when I got home. I was disappointed to see Kevin’s huge form sitting on my front porch when I drove into the driveway, but that disappointment was joined by a feeling of guilt as soon as I saw the suitcase and duffel bag next to him on the ground. He sat there and waited for me to make it up to the porch.

  “Kevin? Are you okay? Did Nick kick you out?”

  It still amazed me how a giant could have the face of a child. He looked so sad and my heart broke a little
bit for him when he looked up at me with those big, blue eyes of his.

  “I’m okay,” he said, obviously lying. “Nick didn’t do anything. I just can’t keep staying there, living off of him. I’m almost out of money, and I can’t keep taking my dad’s money and letting him think Charlie’s training me. I have to go home and figure this out. Hopefully, I’ll be back, but I have to figure out how to do that on my own dime and not Dad’s.”

  I sat down next to him and dropped my backpack. “What about Elaine?”

  He visibly winced. “I really like her. I feel terrible about leaving her, but when I explained the situation, she said she understood. I know it’s not possible to think she’ll wait for me. I haven’t even been able to figure out what she’s doing with me in the first place, but that doesn’t stop me from hoping still.”

  I knew that feeling. I hadn’t spoken to Nick in almost a week, but I couldn’t let go of the hope that things would somehow work out, either, no matter how unlikely that was. I put my hand on Kevin’s big arm, and we just sat there for a while with neither of us saying anything until he finally broke the silence and said, “Nick’s miserable.”

  I looked up at his face as he went on, “He goes to the gym, and he comes home and stalks around the house, or sometimes he’ll go out back and hit the bag on the porch for hours, like he’s trying to kill it. His phone rings constantly, and he doesn’t answer it. His dad has been by twice this week, but Nick won’t talk to him.”

  I knew where he was going with this, so I said, “He’s the one that didn’t want me, Kevin.”

  “Are you sure, Karli? I mean…it’s not my place to say this, but maybe he just doesn’t know how to have a relationship. His friend Jonah came by a few days ago. He wanted Nick to go out with him, but Nick told him he was sick to death of nothing but parties and skanky women who throw themselves at him.”

  “I’m sorry he’s unhappy, Kevin, I really am. But Nick chased me relentlessly until he caught me and suddenly, he didn’t want me anymore. It was what I was afraid would happen all along. I just didn’t think it would happen so fast.”

  “I know it’s not my business, Karli, but I think maybe he’s just scared.”

  I nodded. “That’s understandable, but a grown man should know how to deal with those feelings without having a temper tantrum or a total meltdown. I don’t need a spoiled child in my life. I need a man.

  “I knew Nick was still in the process of growing up when I met him, that much was obvious. I let my attraction to him cloud my judgment, and at the end of the day, I bear as much responsibility for the way I’m feeling right now as he does. Maybe, one of these days, he and I can work our way back to being friends, but I can’t see that we’ll ever be able to get beyond that.”

  Kevin surprised me by putting his arm around me and pulling me in for a hug. He held me there for a second and then let go and stood up. He pulled out his phone and looked at the time. “I should get going; my flight leaves in an hour.”

  “Do you want a ride to the airport?”

  “Nah, I can call a cab.”

  “I really don’t…”

  My phone started ringing. I looked at it and saw that it was my Uncle Lenny. He was battling cancer and other than to go to his treatments, he rarely left the house. I usually tried to visit him once a week, but I’d been so busy, I hadn’t gotten over to see him. Feeling guilty about that, I said, “Hang on just a second, Kevin.” I pressed answer and put the phone to my ear. “Hi Uncle Lenny, I was just—”

  “Is this Karli?” It was a young, female voice, probably one of his nurses.

  “Yes, this is Karli; who’s this?”

  “My name is Mary. I’m one of the nurses that take care of your Uncle Lenny. I tried to reach your father, but he’s not answering.”

  “Mary, what is it?”

  “I had to call an ambulance. Lenny stopped breathing.”

  Fuck! “Okay, where are they taking him?”

  “To General, and just so you know, the EMTs did get his heart started and he’s breathing again without assistance.”

  “Good. That’s good to know, thank you.” I hung up and Kevin asked,

  “Is something wrong, Karli?”

  “It’s my uncle…our uncle. He has lung cancer. He’s been doing well, but the nurse says he wasn’t breathing this morning and he didn’t have a pulse. The EMTs had him breathing and his heart beating before they took him to the hospital, she said—”

  “Oh no! Please don’t worry about me. I’ll change my flight for a later one and go with you.”

  “Really?”

  He picked up his luggage and tossed them both into a corner of the porch. “He’s my uncle, too, right? You don’t leave family when they need you.”

  I thought about my dad. Kevin sure didn’t learn that from him. I’d almost been in denial right up to that point about how angry I was with him. How dare he make a child and then just turn his back on him? How dare he not acknowledge him even now, when he was right here in his face and obviously still needed him?

  “He’s your uncle, too, and he’s going to love you. Come on. I’ll try to get in touch with Dad on the way.”

  ********

  Kevin and I were both half asleep in the waiting room at the hospital two hours later when Dad finally got there. He’d been in the cage sparring all morning and hadn’t heard his phone. He came as soon as he got the messages. He glanced at Kevin, and then looked at me and said, “Hey, how is he?”

  I sat up straight and shrugged. “The doctor was with him when we got here, but so far, they haven’t told us anything at all.” He looked at Kevin again.

  “Thank you for coming, son.”

  Kevin sat up straight, too. He looked surprised. I didn’t blame him. “Sure, you’re welcome.”

  Dad started pacing the room. Other than me, Uncle Lenny was the most important person in Dad’s life. Their mother died giving birth to Lenny when Dad was eight years old. Lenny was premature, and the doctors didn’t expect him to make it.

  Dad said that his father tried caring for them until Lenny was about two and Dad was ten, but Lenny required a lot of special care and he just couldn’t do it on his own. They moved in with his mother’s parents, and sometime over the next year, their Dad just quit coming home at all. My dad said he got letters and money from him from time to time, but by the time he was fourteen, that all stopped, too.

  He helped his grandma with Lenny as much as he could, so they grew up close in spite of the age difference. Dad always told me that was why he was so intent on giving me a good life after Mom left. Parents aren’t supposed to abandon their children. I looked at Kevin and wondered why he was Dad’s exception.

  “Mr. Henderson?” A tall, thin, middle-aged man in green scrubs stepped out of the back. He had dark hair that looked almost too thick for a man his age and a dark tan. He wore gold-rimmed glasses perched on the end of his nose and a black stethoscope around his neck.

  “Yes, I’m Charlie Henderson. Lenny is my brother.”

  “Mr. Henderson had a pulmonary embolism. That’s what stopped his breathing. The lack of oxygen caused him to go into cardiac arrest.”

  “Is he going to be okay?”

  “He’s stable for now, but he hasn’t woken up yet. The nurse that was with him thought he was taking a nap, and she has no real idea how long he was without oxygen before she realized that he wasn’t breathing. We won’t be able to really tell any more until he wakes up.”

  “So this doesn’t have anything to do with the cancer?”

  “No, it actually does. People with cancer are at high risk for blood clots. This particular one is called a deep vein thrombosis, and it can often be deadly. The chemotherapy he’s been receiving can also increase his risk. Did his oncologist talk to you about any of this, or tell you what the signs and symptoms of a DVT are?”

  Dad looked at me. I was standing next to him. “I’m Karli Henderson, doctor. I’m Lenny’s niece. To be honest, his nurses are the ones
that take him back and forth to all of his doctor’s appointments. We’ve just been assuming they were telling us everything. I guess that wasn’t a good idea.”

  “I’m sure you both have lives outside of being care providers,” he said, probably just to be nice. I didn’t know about Dad, but I was feeling as guilty as hell for not being there more. “You’re welcome to go back and see him now, one at a time. He’s breathing on his own and his ECG shows normal brain activity, so right now, we’re optimistic. Hopefully, he will wake up soon.”

  I opened my mouth. I was going to say something, or ask a question, but it stuck in my throat. Nick was standing in the doorway holding a flat box filled with take-out containers. His blue eyes were on my face like he was trying to read it. My mouth was completely dry, and I couldn’t speak. Thank God for Kevin once again, because he took the lead.

  “Hey, Nick, is that food for us?”

  Nick smiled at him and held out the box. Kevin went over and took it, but before he walked away, he and Nick exchanged a half-assed bro hug. I looked at Dad. He didn’t seem surprised that Nick was there. “I’m going to go back and see him, if no one minds me going first?”

  “No, go ahead,” I told him.

  “Yeah,” Kevin said. “I think I’ll wait until he wakes up before I see him. At least then I can introduce myself.” Dad walked over toward the door, and Nick’s hand came out and patted him on the back. Dad gave him a little smile. What the hell is going on? “I’m going to take a little walk before I eat,” Kevin said as he sat the food down on the round table in the corner. “Maybe get a soda. Does anyone else need anything?”

  Nick and I both said no. Dad had already gone to the back to see Uncle Lenny. Suddenly, I was alone in the room with Nick, and he was sucking out all of the oxygen out of it. “What are you doing here?”

  “Your dad needed a ride. I dropped him off and went to pick up lunch. He hasn’t eaten all day.”

  “Oh, well, that was nice of you.”

  “Let’s sit down.” He reached out for my hand, and I almost automatically gave it to him. I decided against touching him at the moment and just slipped ahead of him instead. We went and sat down near where Kevin had sat the box full of food. “Is your uncle going to be okay?”