Beautifully Unnatural: A Young Adult Paranormal Boxed Set

by Amy Miles

  But I’m not your girlfriend.

  Right.

  I’d hoped for a more encouraging answer, but wasn’t surprised. So why let him think we’re together?

  He glanced at me as he chewed, one brow elevated. I’m spending every night at your house, shadowing you at school, double dating with you and defending you against Daniel. What do you think the chances are of anyone believing we’re not together? If we deny it, we look like liars.

  I’d wanted him to say, “Wishful thinking, Autumn. I know we can’t be together forever, but can’t we live in the moment?” I wasn’t going to get an answer like that from him.

  “Bathroom?” Maya nodded toward the cafeteria exit.

  I nodded numbly and got up, not even glancing at Zack.

  In the bathroom, she waited until the door closed before questioning me. “What’s up with you two? You guys haven’t spoken one word all through lunch.”

  Actually, we had, but she couldn’t know that. I didn’t sense Zack outside, but would’ve bet anything he was close by, still looking out for me but not near enough to listen in. I knew Maya meant well, but I had nothing encouraging to offer and didn’t want to be interrogated. I stalled, going to the sink to wash my hands. “Nothing’s going on. That’s the problem.”

  “Wow.” She stared at my reflection. “You superlike him.”

  I dried off my hands and shook my head. “I do not superlike him.”

  She spied my reflection in the mirror. “I know what happened. You slept with Zack, then realized you were madly in love with him. But he doesn’t return your feelings, because he’s in love with his neighbor’s twin sister who just returned from the Amazon after everyone thought she was dead.”

  I laughed. “Maya, you’ve been watching too many soap operas.”

  She smiled and I realized she’d gone on her weird tangent to distract me. I turned and grasped her shoulders firmly. “I do like Zack. Very much. But, no, we’re not hooking up. He stays on the couch and I sleep in my room. I promise.”

  “You’ve kissed him though, right? I don’t see what the problem is.” She searched my face to find the answer.

  “Yeah, we’ve kissed but—” I was about to tell Maya the truth, that Zack and I weren’t involved nor did we have plans to remedy that. But Zack’s reasoning came back to me — she wouldn’t believe me in a million years. “He wants to take it slow.”

  “Has he brought up exclusivity yet?”

  I sighed. “No, and he won’t either. His mom is the only thing keeping him here and she’s not going to live forever. This’ll never be a deep and meaningful relationship, Maya.”

  That sounded so depressing when I said it out loud.

  † † †

  Zack waited right outside my last class, walking with me toward the exit with his arm wrapped around my shoulder.

  At the curb, I heard Ashley. “Autumn.”

  She appeared at my side as Trevor arrived and talked to Zack, who held my hand firmly — the perfect way for us to have separate conversations and still know where the other was. He gently squeezed every now and then. I couldn’t take it personally. Getting my hopes up would lead to more disappointment.

  “I was wondering if you wanted to come by my house Friday night. Just some close friends and a jam session. If you play anything, bring it. It’ll be fun.” She frowned. “Uhm. No one else is having a party that night, right?”

  I chuckled. “Not that I know of.”

  “He can come too.” Her eyes darted to my boyfriend. “And Trevor and Maya.”

  “I’ll ask them and let you know. Thanks for the invite.” I threw her a smile. “It sounds fun.”

  She wandered off, but Zack and Trevor were still talking. Cars. Trevor had been saving up and was almost ready to buy.

  “What’s your schedule like this week? I rarely see you around anymore except at dinner.” Trevor gave him a knowing look.

  “Right. And you’re not always with Maya these days,” Zack said sarcastically.

  “Hey, Autumn,” John said.

  “Hi.” Beyond John, I spotted Daniel staring at me like a stalker. It gave me the creeps.

  John followed my gaze. “What’s up with that guy? I didn’t like him before and he wasn’t nearly this disturbing.”

  The last thing I wanted was to involve John, so I lightened my tone. “Who knows?”

  “How’re your parents? Still traipsing around the Grand Canyon?” John asked.

  “Oh. I didn’t tell you. They came home and left again to Montana for a job. I got an email from them last night saying they’d arrived and all was well. They’ll probably be home in a couple weeks or so.” I giggled at John’s surprised face. “I know. Crazy, huh? I guess they realized how unproductive it was to worry so much.”

  “You ready to go?” Zack asked.

  “See you tomorrow, John.” I waved to him as Zack dragged me away.

  My day had been too deflating to enjoy my Mustang, so I tossed my keys to Zack and went to the passenger side. “So what were you reading last night?”

  “Werewolf history.” He opened the door and adjusted the seat to accommodate his longer legs, then started the car.

  I waited to hear more, but he didn’t volunteer anything else. Instead, his eyes fixed on the road ahead, hands stiff on the steering wheel. He definitely was not in a good mood. I wondered what the rest of the evening had in store for us, but had an idea it wouldn’t involve having fun.

  “Why read it again? What were you looking for?” I asked.

  “I thought about what you said and wondered if there might be something about my dad in the history books. Or any mention of SWAAST. Maybe when my mom’s gone, rather than run on my own, it might be safer to search for any who are left.”

  “Hanging out with those SWAAST guys would be even more dangerous. They’re probably the most hunted people ever.” My voice rose. “Being with them is not safer.”

  He glowered at me. “I won’t live my life afraid to do the right thing. What kind of a life is that?”

  “Yeah, you’re a good guy who wants to do good. I respect you for that. But being stupid isn’t smart.”

  Zack gave a quick laugh. “That’s profound, Autumn.”

  “You know what I mean. You’re young and no match for werewolves who are hundreds of years old. You said with age comes strength. You’d be better off joining the king and honing your fighting skills until you get stronger. So long as you’re with them, they won’t hunt you for being a traitor. You’re no good to anyone if you’re dead.”

  He glanced at me and nodded. “Okay. I promise to consider that before I do anything.”

  I didn’t want to think about him leaving or getting hurt — or worse. If we didn’t talk about something else soon, I’d explode. “You want to go to Ashley’s little party Friday night? She invited us to a jam session.”

  “I heard her ask. I figured you’d tell her no,” Zack said.

  “Why’s that? I like Ashley. And her parties are nice. If I’m able to go, I usually do.”

  “I assumed…”

  Realizing what Zack hadn’t finished saying, I flinched. “You assumed that I was too much of a snob to hang out with a junior. I thought we were past that.” When he didn’t deny it, my eyes burned and my throat swelled. After all our time together, I was still the stuck up girl he originally thought me to be.

  “To hell with you, Zack,” I mumbled toward my window.

  CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX

  While Zack worked at the auto shop, I stayed at his house, but hid in his room, so I wouldn’t have to face his family. If they asked me what was wrong, I’d surely spill it. Zack wouldn’t like that. Once I’d finished all my homework, I considered doing his too. I reached for his backpack, but kicked it across the room instead. If he didn’t do it himself, he’d miss out on everything that his studies had to offer. I snorted at the thought and retrieved his backpack. I wrapped up his homework just as he arrived and Cara announced dinner was ready.<
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  As everyone ate, I smiled at all the right times and made polite conversation. I noticed Cara and Favianne’s occasional glance my way, but I didn’t say anything. My goal was to get through it as painlessly as possible. When I got home, I planned to abandon Zack in favor of my room. I needed to separate from him emotionally. He would run alone tonight.

  “Something’s up with the car,” he said as soon as we got on the road toward my house. “It sounds different.”

  “What do you think’s wrong with it?”

  He turned his head, like he was listening for something. “Not sure. I have tomorrow off, so we can take it in the shop and have it checked out.” He guided the car into my driveway and killed the engine.

  Once inside, I immediately hit the stairs. “Goodnight, Zack.”

  He stood at the bottom of the steps. “You don’t want to go running?”

  I turned and faced him, careful to mask the violent turmoil raging within me. “Not with you. No point in bonding, remember?”

  Once in my room, I closed the door and locked it. Jumping on my bed, I covered my face with my hands.

  “Autumn.” He rapped on the door and when I didn’t answer, the doorknob rattled. “Damn it, open the door.” Seconds passed and he kicked at it. “Open the door or I’ll break it down, I swear.”

  I believed him. I couldn’t have my parents coming home, seeing the broken door and worrying that I’d been attacked or something. I wiped my eyes and got up. Before unlocking it, I took a moment to erase any emotion from my face.

  Opening the door a few inches, I poked my head out. “What?”

  “I can’t leave you alone.” He glared at me. “You know that.”

  “Then don’t go running. Simple.”

  “That won’t work. It’s easy for you to resist, but not me.” He sighed. “Can we talk about this?”

  I flung the door open and turned away, knowing he would follow. On my bed again, I leaned back against the wall, my knees up.

  “Sorry about the Ashley thing.” He cautiously sat at the foot of my bed. “I wasn’t thinking. I know you’re not like that anymore.”

  “Anymore? I was never like that, Zack!”

  “That came out wrong,” he said quickly. “I meant that I don’t think that way anymore. About you.” He ran a hand through his hair and growled. “I’m sorry.”

  That was better. But he wasn’t there yet. I stared at him, my brows raised.

  “Autumn…” He looked at me helplessly.

  I had no intention of bailing him out. “Are you finished?”

  “And I’m sorry for being so—”

  “Cold?” I finished for him. “Impersonal? Unfriendly? Distant? Hurtful?”

  He held up his hand. “I get the picture. Yes. All of those things.” He studied the fabric of my purple comforter. “It’s just that I’ve had a lot to process lately and some decisions to make.” His voice lowered. “You’re not stuck up. Actually, I think a lot of you. If I didn’t, I wouldn’t be here.”

  I couldn’t make more of his words than they were. We had a mutual respect. Nothing else.

  “I’m sorry I hurt you,” he said softly.

  I swallowed and glanced away, so he wouldn’t see the tears in my eyes.

  “Will you go running with me?”

  “Sure,” I forced out. “Give me a few minutes and I’ll be down.”

  If he saw me cry, he’d probably feel sorry for me. We’d probably end up kissing and I couldn’t open myself up like that again, expose my emotions, so he could stomp all over them. Still, he hadn’t moved and I wondered what he was thinking. Hopefully, he’d take my reaction to mean that complete forgiveness wasn’t his yet. Which it wasn’t.

  The mattress quaked as Zack got up. When he was gone, I leaned my head back and breathed.

  I hated Zack.

  I hated him for being the most gorgeous guy I’d ever seen. For being nice to even the nerds. For helping me and protecting me, for inviting me into his home and sharing his mother with me. I hated him for shielding me from the evil that was Daniel. I hated the way he joked and teased me and chuckled when he thought I did something cute. I hated him for thinking I was beautiful.

  I hated him for being exactly who I wanted him to be.

  Mostly, I hated myself for being desperately in love with him.

  I couldn’t go downstairs yet.

  Closing my eyes, I imagined being a giant bird, almost weightless as I soared soundlessly through the sky. When I felt the tremor of my body beginning to shift, I relaxed my muscles and tossed the image away. But my moment in the make-believe wind calmed me enough to go downstairs. I took them one step at a time, wondering how I would do this with Zack day after day if he could never be mine. And knowing one day, he’d be gone.

  As I reached the last step, we both instinctively zeroed in on the front door just before the bell rang.

  He peeked through the gap between the curtains. It’s Gina, he told me silently. Zack opened the door and she entered hesitantly.

  Why did you let her inside? I asked.

  I’m curious to know what would make her so desperate that she’d show her face at your house, he answered, one corner of his mouth curving up.

  “What are you doing here?” I wanted to throw her right back out.

  “I couldn’t find Daniel and thought he might be here.” She glanced at Zack. “But I see now that was never a possibility.”

  “Is he missing again?” Zack asked, coming up beside me and casually slipping his arm around my waist.

  Gina made a strange sound between a laugh and a sob. “He keeps going MIA these days, especially at night.” Her gaze fixed on the wood flooring. “He doesn’t answer his phone and his parents can’t reach him either.” She returned her attention to me. “I think he’s cheating on me.”

  A normal response would’ve been to say, “I told you so” or make a sarcastic remark and urge her to dump him. But if she followed that advice, Daniel might get freaky and stalk her the way he’d been stalking me. At least I had superpowers and Zack to protect me. Gina was probably safer with Daniel.

  “He hasn’t been here, Gina,” Zack said. “I’d know if he was. I’ve been here a lot the last few days.”

  That wasn’t subtle at all. Zack must’ve wanted to make sure Daniel knew we were still together. My gut told me Daniel was already in the loop.

  “You’re probably thinking if he was unfaithful to you, why would he be any different with me?” Her eyes welled up with tears. “And if he is with another girl, I deserve it.”

  “I doubt he’s cheating on you,” I said. She would never know the absolute truth, but I could give her part of it. “We’ve seen him at night when we’ve gone out and he was alone. Maybe that’s all he wants. Solitude.”

  “Hope you’re right. He’s been different lately. It’s hard to figure him out.” She smiled and shuffled her feet awkwardly. “Well, thanks. Goodnight.”

  I opened the door and closed it after her, turning to Zack.

  He clucked his tongue. “I want to hate her for what she did to you, but I feel bad for her. Daniel’s evil. And she just doesn’t see it.”

  I felt sorry for her, too. Hopefully she’d learn from the mess she’d made.

  During the drive to the woods, Zack was quiet. Too quiet. I wanted to keep him talking, so I didn’t have to think about how unavailable he was. Or how I was being stalked by a crazed newly-made werewolf or that if I wasn’t careful, I could become a slave.

  “That you know of, have there been any other werewolves around here besides Daniel and the two scouts?” I asked.

  “I’ve noticed others over the last couple years, since I matured. But you mean lately?”

  I nodded.

  “When we first moved in with Aunt Cara, I ran across a couple wolves in the woods. As soon as they saw me, they took off running. I have no idea who they were and haven’t seen them since. I thought I sensed wolf a few times on errands for my mom. Once at the bank and
another time at the grocery store. There were always too many people around, so I couldn’t locate where the energy was coming from.”

  “If you sense an energy, it could easily be coming from a shape-shifter too, right?”

  “I guess so,” Zack answered. “But I’m thinking that since they’re weaker, sensing their energy isn’t as easy. Like with you. Are you thinking of your parents?”

  “Maybe.” I averted my gaze.

  “If you find out they’re human, you won’t be able to tell them what’s going on. If they’re shifters, they’re in danger too. You should be prepared either way.”

  Zack parked and we bailed from my car, in a hurry to feel the wind. As soon as we were in the tree covering, we ran. When we stopped, I realized Zack had turned into a wolf.

  Shift, he told me as he raced past trees. Try something new.

  As I kept up with Zack, I pictured a lion. My body vibrated a moment, my step faltered, and then I was on all fours. I sprinted to catch up with him.

  Zack slowed until I was running beside him. Nice. I guess you like cats. You’re the total opposite of me.

  What a tool. Why did he take every opportunity to remind me how different we were and that it wasn’t going to happen between us? Just when I felt like I might forgive him, he’d do it again. I veered off to get away before I swiped at him. Zack followed.

  As we sprinted through the forest, I quickly bored of being a lion. Cheetahs were supposed to be fast, weren’t they? I slowed to a stop, intending to morph. My body quivered and nausea rose up. My eyes blurred as I watched Zack become a boy again.

  “Go to your human form first. Do it now!”

  I fell to the ground, trees swirling around me as I shifted back to human. Thankfully, I’d worn all natural fibers.

  He loomed over me, grasping my hand. “Are you okay?”

  “I think so. The nausea is passing.” I used the back of my hand to wipe the perspiration from my forehead.

  “Human is your other half. It stabilizes you. Always go back before shifting into anything else.”

  “Got it.” Something pulled at me. Something different. Something I needed to see. My eyes drifted to his chest, down his abdomen. “You look nice.”