Here's to Now
Page 21
She winces when my eyebrows slam together in instant anger. “Are we seriously fucking going there? Again? If you’re so ashamed of me, Haley, why marry me in the first place?”
Hurt rolls over her features and tears spring to her eyes. They fall before I can grasp what’s happening. Sobs wrack her small body, the bed shaking from how hard she’s crying.
I almost feel bad for my words, but the way her questions tear through my heart like a tornado leaves me not caring much about her tears. Asshole of me, yes. Wrong, no. I shouldn’t have to hide my feelings, especially if they’re honest. I shouldn’t have to tiptoe around something this huge, this life changing, and I for damn sure will not hide this relationship any longer, not like we did before. I am not ashamed of loving Haley. Hell, I’d shout it from the fucking rooftop of this high-rise hotel if we had access.
“Gaige…”
With that one simple word falling from her plump, pink lips, all my resolve fades. All my bravado flies right out the window.
“Sorry. That was harsh, but shit, Haley, I can’t hide this. I don’t want to. I’m not ashamed of what we did. If anything, I regret not having everyone there. I regret how we got married. You deserve so much more than a secret ceremony. You deserve an engagement. You deserve having it done the right way.” I wince. “I told you I’m the king of bad decision-making. This is just another example.”
“You think our marriage was a bad decision?”
“Fuck no! It was the best one I’ve ever made, but doing it behind our friends’ backs? Yeah, that was shitty. Not treating you like you deserve and showing the world how lucky I am to have the most amazing woman agree to marry me? Wrong. So wrong.”
She cries harder. What the hell have I said now that’s upset her?
“What did I say?”
“Nothing. Everything.”
“You’re going to need to be a bit more specific, Hales.”
She grins. It’s small, but it’s there nonetheless. Odd how that such a small form of expression makes my heart race, how it makes this entire situation so much better.
“If I had wanted those things, I wouldn’t have married you. I would have insisted all that last night before you whispered in my ear.”
“All I said was three words.”
“And those three words were all it took.”
Grinning, I scoot closer, pulling her into my arms. I hover my lips over hers and say, “Should I say them again?”
“Say them forever?” Anticipating my kiss, her eyes fall shut.
“Do you mean that?” She tremors at the thick, groggy emotions in my voice.
She kisses me, rolling us over until she’s on top of me. Her lips coax mine apart as she takes charge with her tongue, creating a sweet, soft friction between us. She rocks her hips against mine and pulls away. “Yes.”
I tell her when I roll her back over, sliding between her legs and into her with little effort.
“I love you.”
I tell her when I rock my hips against hers, pushing myself in as deep as I can go until she’s shuddering in the best mix of pain and pleasure.
“I love you.”
I say it when I persuade moan after moan out of her, meeting each one with a thrust of my own.
“I love you.”
I whisper it to her in every kiss I lay across her lips, her cheeks, her neck.
“I love you.”
And I make sure to tell her in the biggest way I can: by slamming my hips home as she falls apart around me.
“I love you, Haley Addams.”
“Waffles or pancakes?”
“Waffles,” Haley says, handing her menu to the waitress.
“Did you really pick waffles over pancakes?”
“What? It’s fun to drip the syrup in the little holes.”
I brush my lips against her ear, saying, “I may need to rethink those vows.”
Blushing, she ducks away just as Hudson clears his throat.
“This is still so strange to see,” Maura says.
Haley’s head snaps up. “Huh?”
“You two. It’s odd. I would have never guessed.”
“I wish I could say the same for you and Tuck, but I called that shit ages ago.”
“You did?” Tucker turns to Maura. “He did?”
She nods. “He has good instincts.”
“Huh. Well then.” Tucker takes a swig of his coffee. “How’d you guys like the show?”
“It was fantastic!” Rae says. “Thank you again for letting us all come along.”
My roommate rolls his eyes. “Of course. It’s your wedding gift. A combo bachelor-bachelorette Vegas party, who wouldn’t want that?”
“I wouldn’t,” Perry practically moans from the other end of the table. He wobbles some, a clear indication he may still be drunk. Dallas glares over at him and I wonder what’s up his ass.
“Is that new?”
I turn toward the voice. Hudson’s staring at Haley’s hand wrapped around her glass of orange juice. More accurately, he’s staring at her wedding ring—the one I slipped on her finger less than twelve hours ago, the one that sets my heart ablaze when I see it.
Haley nods and quickly ducks her hand under the table, leaving Hudson’s scrutiny to fall upon me. He tilts his head in the slightest before his eyes fly to my hand, the one attached to the arm I have around Haley…the one that does not give him a view of my ring finger from his perch. Craning his neck, he tries to get a glimpse, but I move my hand down, making sure he doesn’t see anything as I raise a challenging brow at him. Understanding dawns and he shakes his head twice, hanging it for only a moment before Rae speaks up.
“Where’d you guys go last night?”
Realizing she’s talking to me, I clear my throat. “What do you mean?”
“You disappeared after that fifth round of shots. I spotted you on the dance floor practically making babies”—I cringe at the words she uses and press my hand harder into Haley back—“and then you were gone.”
Taking a quick peek at Haley, she nods her head oh so subtly, letting me know it’s okay to tell them.
I take one last glance at Hudson. Seeing a cocky smirk lining his face, I kick him under the table. The smirk never slips.
“Last night we—”
“Who had the waffles?” the red-haired waitress asks, sliding up to the table with a tray piled high with food.
“Damn, that was fast,” Dallas says.
The waitress winks at him, a frizzy lock of hair falling into her eyes. “This is Vegas, baby. We have to be fast here.”
She passes out the food, promising to come back with more syrup and butter before disappearing again. We all dig into our meals, ignoring the question Rae asked.
Chew. Think. Chew. Think.
My phone buzzes in my pocket. I reach down and pull it out, surprised to see Hudson’s name on my screen.
Hudson: DID YOU FUCKING REALLY?
Me: I have no idea what you’re talking about.
Hudson: You do realize you’re a total dumbass, right?
Holding my screen away from Haley, I shoot Hudson a glare then return my attention to my phone.
Me: That’s rich coming from you.
Hudson: Seriously, man. Did you even tell her about your siblings?
Me: Yes, DAD.
Hudson: All of it??
My brows slam together and I start to shove my phone back in my pocket when it vibrates again.
Hudson: That’s what I thought. Tell. Her.
“What’s up?” Haley asks, and I thrust my phone into my jeans before she can see the screen. “Anyone important?”
“Nope, just some jackass,” I reassure her, stamping a quick, sticky, syrupy kiss to her cheek.
“You never did say where you ran off to,” Hudson throws out.
Again, I kick him under the table. This time it’s hard enough to cause him to wince.
Rae reaches over at his reaction. “You okay?”
“Yep,” he
grunts. “Peachy. Just a cramp…in my ass.”
Tucker lifts his face from his plate at that one, cocking a brow at Hudson. “I thought having something in your ass was Dall’s style.”
Dallas’ face goes bright red. “I hate you.”
Tucker winks. “Hate me, want me—same difference.”
I chuckle, taking a sip of my water. Tucker and Dallas have grown quite close since Tucker came back to Wakefield after his first tour to find Maura living with some random guy. Once Tuck found out Dallas was definitely not barking up Maura’s tree—wrong equipment—they became quick friends. In turn, Dallas has become a key player in our group. He has our backs and we have his—always.
“So, Gaige…”
“So, jackass,” I throw right back to Hudson.
“We got married!”
The entire table falls silent. I look to Haley, stupefied by her outburst. She blushes and ducks her head, nervous about what’s going to happen next. I wrap my arm around her again, bringing her in close to me, trying to protect her. From what? I have no idea, but I’m scared too.
Then, out of nowhere, a loud cackle fills the room. Rae throws her head back, the noise leaving her in giant gusts. It sounds part amused, part sad, and part angry. Even Hudson is frozen by it.
“Good one,” she finally says, calming herself down and wiping the tears from her under her eyes. She picks her fork up and takes a huge bite of her waffle. “Fucking good one, guys.”
When no one else makes a noise or even moves, Rae swings her eyes toward us as we sit together, waiting. It reminds me of the time the sky turned yellow and I waited with my parents in the bathroom for the tornado to pass. There was a tiny window where I could see the swirling clouds turn the gray, dreary sky into a vivid green-yellow. It was ugly, and so beautiful; it was also terrifying, but I couldn’t look away. I was ensnared. I wanted to know what was going to happen next. I wanted to know if the sky was going to open up for the rain to fall, fall, fall until it released all its anger and the storm faded away, or if a violent tornado was going to tear through my life and take away everything I had.
Sitting here as Rae’s eyes fall to our joined hands resting atop Haley’s shoulder, watching as she carefully scans our fingers until she sees two simple gold bands among the bundle, a storm is brewing, and we are all just waiting for it to pass.
Then, the sky rips apart, and Rae’s tears begin to fall.
Relief floods through me, knowing a tornado isn’t coming.
For several minutes, she cries. We all sit, stunned, shifting uncomfortably. Hudson is the only one to approach her, to wrap his arms around her and whisper encouraging words.
After what seems like a flood for the history books, her bright, red-rimmed eyes meet mine, and then they flash to Haley’s. Rae rises, and I’m certain she’s going to run. Instead, she calmly walks around the table to us and holds out her arms.
Haley, whose mouth hangs wide open, lifts herself from her chair and falls into her sister’s embrace. They cry some more and say things I can barely understand, but they aren’t screaming or fighting, so I suppose it’s good. Rae squeezes her eyes shut, then opens them, staring directly at me. I can’t tell if she’s happy or upset; honestly, either one scares me. When they finally pull apart, Rae leans down and points a finger in my face.
“You’re a jerk, a dumbass, and now my brother-in-law. I love you, but if you ever hide anything from me again, I will chop your nuts off and feed them to Tucker.”
“Hey! What the shit? I don’t want his nuts in my mouth!”
Tucker’s outburst dispels the tension in the group and everyone laughs, picking up their forgotten silverware and pushing through their now lukewarm meals. Rae gives Haley one last look and returns to her side of the table, leaning down to speak with Hudson. He nods, shoots me a glance, and excuses them both.
“Well that was…”
“Awkward,” Dallas finishes.
“You can say that again,” Perry chimes in.
“Awkward.”
Perry glares in Dallas’ direction, and Dallas responds with a smirk.
Huh, wonder what’s going on there.
“Are you two going to stay married?”
The question shocks me, especially since it comes from Maura. I peek at Haley, who’s looking at Maura in disbelief, and then I find Tucker’s face. He too is surprised by Maura’s question.
“Babe”—he clears his throat—“that was kind of rude.”
“Sorry,” she says sheepishly. “It’s a valid question though.”
“Not really,” Haley speaks up. “Why wouldn’t we?”
Maura’s eyebrows fall together. “Wasn’t this one of those ‘I got drunk in Vegas and all I got was this crappy marriage’ things? I mean, you’re not really ready for marriage…are you?”
Tucker places his hand on Maura’s arm like he’s trying to reel her questions back in.
“Yes,” my wife says. “Is it traditional? No, but love isn’t always hearts and flowers and shiny shit. Love is unpredictable. Love is adventurous. Love is…us.”
“Oh gag me.”
“That can be arranged,” I hear Dallas mutter in response to Perry’s comment.
I choke on a laugh, trying to keep my face straight and keep focused on Maura and what’s going on.
“We have no plans of annulling this marriage and pretending it never happened,” Haley presses on. “Or divorcing.” She turns to me. “I don’t believe in divorce, by the way.”
“Noted,” I tell her.
“How are you going to make it work? What happens if something comes up that you don’t agree on? What if you aren’t as good a match as you think? If your two halves don’t make a whole?”
“We’ll make it work,” I say before Haley can answer. “Besides, aren’t those questions you can ask any married couple? That’s not a valid line of questioning. You’re grasping.”
“Testing.”
“Huh?”
“I’m testing you two, Gaige.” She smiles widely. “You passed.”
“Dammit, Maura.” Tucker expels a heavy breath. “I thought I was going to have to teach you some manners.”
She turns to him and suggestively wiggles her brows. “You still can.”
“Okay. Nope. No. I’m not listening to this shit anymore. I’m going to find the bar.” Perry throws his napkin down and pushes away from the table, scurrying away as fast as he can.
“We leave at eleven!” Haley calls after him. “What’s his deal?” she asks Dallas.
Dallas shrugs. “No fuckin’ clue, sweetheart.”
Tucker and Maura stand just as abruptly as Perry did. He grabs her hands and hauls her from the hotel restaurant, hollering for us to charge it to his room.
“Why the fuck did everyone decide to leave us with the responsibility of the bills?” I wonder aloud.
Dallas snickers. “You two are the only married ones.”
“Yeah, but Hudson’s a dad. Doesn’t that mean he’s, like, the most responsible one?”
“Joey’s not here. You two are.” With that, he stands and starts to leave.
“Hey! What am I supposed to do about your bill?”
“Charge it to Perry’s room. He owes me.” Then he’s gone.
I stare after him, amazed our friends would all ditch us with their bills.
“That was oddly suggestive,” Haley says, staring at the spot Dallas just abandoned.
I nod. “Definitely.”
She goes to take the last bite of her soggy waffle when I say, “Wanna get out of here, wife?”
A smile lights her face and she places her fork down calmly. When she meets my excited gaze, I can see she’s just as eager as I am.
“I thought you’d never ask, husband.”
“So I know this isn’t ideal or anything, but I kind of promised the twins I’d stay the night over at my aunt’s tonight. I forgot about it in the midst of”—I wave a hand between the two of us—“well, all of this.”
“Oh. Okay.”
She’s upset, and rightly so. We should be spending this time together. We just got married yesterday. But, because we rushed into it, we didn’t talk about any of the obligations we already had lined up. Hell, we didn’t even talk about where we’re going to live, who’s going to pay what bills. I have no idea how we’ll make this work.
“It’s fine, Gaige. I promise.”
Taking a step closer to her, I reach out and grab her luggage from her hands, stuffing it into the trunk with mine.
“Are you sure?” I ask, turning her way and crowding against her. I cup her face in my hands and place a simple kiss on her upturned lips. “Because I can cancel if you want.”
She shakes her head. “No, I’m not going to keep you from your family, although…it would be nice to meet them—you know, since you only told me about them yesterday morning and all.”
I wince. “I’m sorry.”
“I know you are.”
“You know what? You’re right. We can go tonight. Come on.” I take her hand, pulling her toward the passenger door. She tugs back, refusing to move very far.
“I want you to do this on your own terms, not because I said something about it.”
“I promise this is on my own terms.” I open the door for her and motion her toward me. “Please, come meet my family. My sisters are going to love you.”
She hesitates, moving from one foot to another, shifting her eyes around the way too expensive parking garage.
“You’re going to cost me another hour in parking fees,” I tease. “If I have to pay another fifteen dollars, I’ll make you pay me back in kisses.”
She grins. “That doesn’t sound like a threat in the least.”
“Come on, Hales. Please. You’re my family now too. It’s only right you meet your new in-laws.”
When she doesn’t move, I take a step in her direction. Then another. Another. Step, step, until I’ve sidled directly in front of her, my chest brushing hers. She lifts her head, meeting my heated stare. I bend until my mouth grazes hers.
“You better get your sexy, married ass into my car right this instant, Mrs. Haley Addams, or I will kiss you until you’re breathless.”