The Concubine

by Phal, F.

  “It Matters! You stupid little whore! How could you have allowed such foolishness to happen? How could you willingly allow yourself to be fucked by that loathsome bastard? My wife!” the covers where immediately yanked off my person, leaving me utterly exposed to his wrathful, malevolent stare.

  “This!” he pressed his fingers against the mark on higher most part of my thigh. “This marks you as mine! How could you have betrayed me!” a sense of déjà vu washed over me and I cynically ponder at the price only mortal men could set on my flesh.

  “How could I have betrayed you when I never belonged to you to begin with?” my personal battles with these two possessive men it seems always takes place on bed; how truly fortunate for me.

  He looks at me with a look of utter betrayal. “You don’t love me?”

  “I love, Marik. Marik is my king, he is my master and he owns every last inch of my being. He is my soul mate, destined to be together for lifetimes to come. We will always find each other, no matter the distance because he and I are one.” the realization has just hit me, the truth of the words I speak a testament to what I feel, what I have felt. You are my everything, Marik and I know that I have loved you before just as I know I will love you again, in another time, in another place, we will always love again.

  His laughter when it begins is maniacal and bone chilling. He alights from the bed and pinions me with his stare. “Well then, if that is how it is to be than I am afraid I will have to kill you.” He says it so easily, as though discussing the weather and I fear him in that moment because I know he means it.

  “If I cannot have you, then he won’t either. I promise you, he will never lay his filthy hands on you again!” When he leaves me, I wonder whether this is how my story will end.

  ***

  I am entirely too weary, my love. I have not lived long, yet I feel as though I have lived many lifetimes in a span of a few short years. I was born into slavery. I have known nothing else but the dictates of powerful men, always leading me around on the leash that bound me to their laws. You were not my first lover, my King, but you are my only. You are the only one who holds my heart captive and with you I have known the sweet pleasures of the flesh. I known misery, I have known happiness. With you Marik I have learned love, and amassed limitless patience. With you I have fathered two beautiful boys and another with your enemy, but my love for them is unmeasured. Through my short life, I have gained wisdom, I have sinned and I have repented and if I were to forfeit that life today, know that it will not be in vain.

  As I awake this morning I am overcome with a wave of serenity I have not felt in forever. I have never felt this haunting calm that even now grips my bones with unrelenting sweetness. I have had another dream and in it I was naked in the middle of a verdant field. The wind whistling, its breath tenderly warm against my naked flesh. And then the storming clouds above my head opened up and rained. On me the heavens bleed, actual blood rained in pellets down on me and as I lifted my head and stuck out my hand it suddenly became clear to me. The chilling darkness from my daydream yesterday, last evening’s downpour of blood in my dreams and finally the erratic feelings of foreboding that has followed me like a dark cloud until now, all signified something. Today or maybe sometime soon my life will be forfeit and Lucian will be the one to snuff it out. But before that occurs, something miraculous will happen and you, Marik, will live on with our children, you will regain your kingdom back and all will be right.

  I know the time has come, even before the palace shakes with the countless blast of canons that has been bombarding the palace walls since this morning. The war has begun and now it is time for me to be taken away. I am escorted to the parapet of the palace, between two hulking soldiers who will not live to see this battle out. Archers lined the walls, hidden away ready for another signal to attack. I am brought to stand inches behind Lucian, with his back to me he faces out into the horizon. Like avengers of the apocalypse, I am able to see the endless rows of thousands of men who make up your army and my heart stutters for a moment.

  ***

  “Tell me something,” Lucian’s voice is devoid of emotion as he speaks. “Do you love our son as much as you love his?”

  “More than life itself.” He turns around then and I feel my knees buckle as I see Liam standing at his knees holding onto his toy bear.

  As if sensing the exact second I decide to move, Lucian signals for the guards at my side to curtail my actions and I slowly shake my head as a sick sense of dread produces bile and it crawls to my throat, bitter and acrid.

  “Mama.” Liam reaches for me, his little arms outstretched, a gentle smile graces his lips and I look into his eyes, beautiful eyes, innocent eyes and I openly weep.

  Lucian scoops up Liam as another blast rocks the palace; only a few more and it will crumble beneath us.

  “He looks so much like me,” he quietly whispers as he runs his hands through Liam’s shoulder length locks. “A perfect little replica of his papa. I wanted us to be a family, we could’ve been a happy family.” his eyes lift to my own wet ones. “I could’ve made you happy.”

  “Lucian please don’t do this.” I beseech him, wanting with desperation to take my son from him.

  “Do you know what made me happy?” he continues. “Knowing that you loved me; knowing that we, Liam, you and I were a family.”

  “I do love you! You fathered my son Lucian and for that I will always love you.”

  ”You took my happiness away, Lea.”

  “Not willingly, you knew! You knew that I could not love you! I only offered my friendship!”

  He ignores me as he turns back to the open field and I scream, struggling like mad against the biting hold of the soldiers as he places Liam on the very ledge of the parapets.

  “No! No! Please God, No!” Liam begins to cry as panic overtakes me, rendering me weak.

  “Mama! Mama!”

  “Shhhh…” Lucian leans over to kiss Liam’s cheek in an attempt to calm him.

  “Because you have taken my happiness away I think it is only fitting if I take away yours, let us both live in misery.”

  He is insane!

  It all happens so fast. In a slow and creeping haze I hear your voice from off the distance shouting orders. And then the arrows rain, chaos breaks loose as though Pandora’s Box has been lifted open. I know not how you have managed to get at this very point but I did not care. Surged with a pounding force to reach my son I use your distraction and manage to detangle myself from the soldiers and with speed I do not know I have I run to the ledge seconds before Lucian can push him over. I yank on his arm, tugging his small, shaking body to me as we fall backwards, my body breaking his fall.

  “Lealin!” I lift my head and through the chaos I see Salyn’s fiery red head, quickly he signals for me to run to him and I need no other incentive as I rise to my feet, cradling Liam to my chest I dodge through a barrage of arrows and corpses littering the stone floor and run to him.

  “Lea!” Lucian’s bellow causes me to turn to find the sickening image of you on your knees. Bloodied and wounded the tip of Lucian’s sword at your throat. Salyn rushes towards you, but Lucian’s warning stops him in his tracks.

  “Come to me, Lea and I will let him go!” the arrows have temporarily seized.

  “Do not listen to him, Lealin! Salyn, get her out of here, NOW!”

  “Will you be content to live the rest of your life knowing you could’ve saved the love of your life, your soul mate as it were, and failed to do so? Can you live with yourself? Come to me and I promise to cease this war! I will take you and Liam and we will be away from here, I promise you.”

  “Stop listening to him, Lea! I’ll be fine! Take your son and get the hell out!” the sword presses further into the flesh of your throat.

  “I would shut it if I were you.” Lucian warnes.

  “You promise?”

  “Lealin!”

  “On my life.”

  “Let him go and I am yours.”
>
  Ask me what I wouldn’t do for you Marik and I would respond with nothing. There is nothing in this world that I would not do for you. I see you so battered and wounded, the once mighty king of a healing nation reduced to your knees before the very bane of your existence and I cannot help but find the fault in myself. All this is happening partially because of me and I wish you know how sorry I am. From the fatigued depths of my soul I truly am sorry my love. I had never wanted this for us, this strife, this war…all this is so wrong. The bodies of men litter the floor, drenched in pools of blood. They may have been our enemies, but never would I wish this upon them, no one deserves this, to fight for a nonsensical cause and defend a psychotic usurper hell bent on possessing that which does not belong to him, it’s all so wretchedly sad.

  If I must go to Lucian in order to put a stop to this nightmare than I do so willingly. With my son at my hip, I tenderly hold his head to my shoulder to keep away the frightening images of bloodied men splayed about and slowly I set one sandaled foot in front of the other and make my way to his side. Your words, your pleading, your curses and finally your threats fall deaf upon my ears; I will not listen, because if I do my resolve will crumble.

  Half way to my destination I lick my lips, my heart aching from the stress. “Release him and I will come to you.”

  “Do you not trust me?”

  “No, not at all. Please, let him go.”

  “Always the martyr?”

  “Better a martyr than a monster.”

  “Very well…” still visibly in peril, he holds the sword to your body and instructs you to rise. I watch as he pushes you forward with the insistent prod of his sword and with great reluctance you walk towards me. I wish to run into your arms and never let go, I wish to cradle Liam between us and bestow teary kisses until you whisper for me to stop. I wish I could hold Fintan and Cairan and see their happy faces. The tears come and I bite down on my lower lip to cease its relentless tremble. We are so close now, yet the chasm that separates us is far too wide. I refuse to look at you, to stare into that can read my soul and instead focus on Lucian.

  Too soon, I am at his side and before I have a moment to blink or even breathe properly Liam is wrenched from my grasp a dagger at his throat! My panic stricken gaze travels to you and I see you holding a perfectly strung bow and arrow targeted at Lucian, Lucian and my son! Dear merciful heavens!

  “Lea, run to me! NOW! ”

  “Run to him and lose your precious son!”

  “How can you do this? This is our child! Our flesh and blood!! Please Lucian! Give him to me please…” what choice do I have? How has it come to this? My darling son struggling and weeping within his own father’s arm begging me to save him! How can fate be so cruel?

  “Tell him to leave this land…take his army and leave and our son will remain in perfect health.”

  The choice is made for me even before I can speak. “Marik, please I beg you, take your army and leave. I choose to stay with Lucian, he is my husband and my place is by his side with our son.”

  “Don’t ask me to do this, Lealin!”

  “Mama!”

  “Marik, please!” you look positively torn and I am so sorry that it has come down to this. My child or you my love?

  “I will come back for you! I promise you that!” And then you’re signaling for Salyn to watch your back as you reluctantly turn around to leave.

  I do not see the flying daggers until it is too late. The blades lanced the air and headed for Lucian and Liam! I do not think, only react as my body propels forward, slamming into both father and son with enough force to push them both to the ground. Momentarily dazed I blink twice before I stagger to my knees and scramble to where they have landed.

  “Liam?” I detach his body from Lucian’s grasp and bring him to my lap.

  “Liam?” I gently shake him, my heart in my throat as I feel something wet and sticky on my fingers.

  “Liam?” he was so still, too still. “Liam? Wake up for, my love…open your eyes for Mama…” the color, he has no color in his cheeks. There is a soul wrenching scream and as I slowly sway with my innocent son on my lap and I know it came from me, deep and achingly horrid sobs wrack my body as I shamelessly weep.

  “L-liam…p-please! Open your eyes for me, love.” This cannot be! It wasn’t supposed to be this way! The world goes on but I am ignorant to it all. I hear the screams and still I sway with my son in my arms. I do not know how long I stay in this position but too soon I feel a hand on my shoulder. I turn to find those horrific blue eyes. This is all his fault, my son is dead because of him! Fury, unadulterated fury clouds my judgment and I bask it, allow it to overtake every bit of me and as I settle Liam’s body on the ground I jump upon him like a woman possessed.

  I punch, and claw and slap and punch again and again and again, utterly mindless. I am unaware I am doing, but I know the darkness has won. It envelops me completely and I fall deeply into its embrace, losing what little bit of sanity I have. I do not remember grasping the sword, but heavens, I am merciless with it. Blood splatters, coating my hands and my face and still I continue to hack away until finally I am dragged away from the blood and guts that was once a living, breathing human being.

  I stare down at the bloodied mangled mess, at what was once Lucian Valencette and I feel nothing.

  “Lean!” and then you are there, holding my blood caked face in your hands, calling me to come back to you. “Lealin!”

  “Liam…” is all I can sorrowfully whisper before I fall into your arms with a sob, holding on to you more tightly than ever before, you, my life line and you buoy me, guide me back from the dark ocean depths of my insanity. I weep and weep until my tears become the rain that falls on us and washes everything away.

  ***

  I sit by his side, he looks so small, so helpless, and so weak but alive, he lives because of Kivar. Thank the high heavens for Kivar and his potions my son is alive. I had not even contemplated the idea of seeking Kiva’s help, but you had my love and I cannot tell you how grateful I am that you did. The war has been won and the casualties are great but my son is not one of them. He is alive, though weak and healing he is nevertheless here with me.

  Krea, the scheming, murderous bitch was swiftly put to death, along with Lucian’s remaining men. The Norian people, those had gone into hiding retuned in droves upon hearing of their young king’s victory and even now the men and women busy about the palace wanting and needing to return it to the glorious jewel it once was. These last three days have been spent in anxious agony awaiting your return with our children from the villages and vigilantly watching Liam’s progression.

  “Come away from that child and eat something, else the king comes and has my neck for not taking care of you.” Kivar grates, setting down a tray filled with food on the table by the bed. I can’t help the smile on my lips as I stand to embrace him. He stiffens and I fear he will push me away, but he surprises me by wrapping his arms around my waist, accepting the affection.

  “You are the greatest friend, Kivar and I thank you ever so much for all you have done for me.” sincerely I say and rise to the tips of my toes to peck his cheek.

  “Save your kisses for our king, woman.” He grumbles but I see the slight twinkle in his eyes and I laugh.

  “Indeed, pet, come and bestow your conquering king with kisses.”

  “Mama!” a whirlwind of black and blond slams into my legs and begin to rapidly babble all at once.

  I fall to my knees and smother both with overdue kisses and tight hugs! “Mama you’re smothering us.” they both chorus and I laughed, squeezing them tighter.

  “Come children and regale me with your adventurous tales of warriors and swords.” They both said a goodbye with a promise to return as Kivar led them away; each fighting to have their tale heard.

  Not a second after and I am in your arms, my lips hungrily fastening to yours, not from passion, but for the simple need to have our lips mesh. Taking in your essence, lavishin
g in the texture, simply being once more Marik and Lealin.

  ***

  Six months later…

  The golden glow of the setting sun sweeps across the paleness of your flesh, casting it in golden loveliness. A smile, pure and joyous expands upon my lips and I lean down to plant a wet kiss between your shoulder blades, just below your nape. The rippling of muscles is all the warning I receive before I am in your arms, lavished with open mouth kisses, caressed by masterful hands, worshiped with unbelievable care.

  “How does it feel to be a Devlar, my love?” in your arms, held tightly against the expanse of your chest, your tongue laves wickedly, paying the utmost care to that spot just behind the shell of my ear that curls my toes.