The Beloved Disciple

by Beth Moore

  John lived the essence of John 15:12-17. He ended his life a true "friend" of Christ, for he took on His interests as surely as Elisha took on the cloak of Elijah. Early church fathers reported that long after John lacked the strength to walk, younger believers carried the beloved disciple in a chair through crowds gathered for worship. His final sermons were short and sweet: "My little children, love one another!" He poured his life into love. Christ's love. The focus of his final days captures the two con­cepts I've learned above all others in this journey:

  · Christ calls His beloved disciples to forsake ambition for affection. John moved from his "pillar" position in the Jerusalem church to rela­tive obscurity. Better to pour out our lives in places unknown than to become dry bones in the places we've always been.

  · Only disciples who are convinced they are beloved will in turn love beyond themselves. Actively embracing the lavish love of God is our only means of extending divine love to injured hearts. We simply can­not give what we do not have.

  Our Abba seems to have made a practice of telling us almost nothing about the actual deaths of His saints. According to Psalm 116:15, we know that their deaths were precious to Him. In fact, we might surmise that the exclusion of details is precisely because they were so precious to Him. Intimate. And none of our business. But don't think for a moment the Savior wasn't nearby when the sounds of an old Son of Thunder grew faint and then silent. After all, John was among the very few who stood nearby when the Incarnate Word fell silent.

  John's death marked the close of the most critical era of human history. He was the solitary remaining apostle who could make the claims of his own pen: "That which was from the beginning, which we have heard, which we have seen with our eyes, which we have looked at and our hands have touched-this we proclaim concerning the Word of life" (1 John 1:1). "We" had turned to "I," and soon "I" would turn to "they."

  At his age John's fragile body probably showed symptoms of failing some hours or even days before he breathed his last. If loved ones gathered around him, they likely did what most of us would do. They tried to make him as comfortable as possible. They may have gently slipped a pillow under his head to help support him as his lungs heaved for air. That's what we did when my mother's fragile frame could no longer sustain the strength to house her soul.

  I'm not sure John needed a pillow, however. Somehow I picture him in his death much like he had been in his life. To me, the scene that captures the beloved disciple most is recorded in John 13:23. The event occurred at a certain table decades earlier. The Amplified Bible says it best. "One of His disciples, whom Jesus loved [whom He esteemed and delighted in] was reclining [next to Him] on Jesus' bosom" (John 13:23). Yes, I like to think that John died just as he lived. Nestled close. Reclining on the breast of an unseen but very present Savior, John's weary head in His tender arms.

  The Spirit and the bride said, "Come!"

  And in the distance could be heard a gentle thunder.

  * * *

  [1]YHWH is the divine name of God, never pronounced by the Jews; in English it is often referred to as Yahweh or Jehovah.

  [2] This time frame is strictly a deduction I have made from comparing time references in John 1:43, John 2:1, and John 2:12-13. I could certainly be mistaken if time lapses existed that weren't noted in these portions of Scripture.