At Ease

by Olivia Brynn

  “Guess we’d better go before the neighbors complain.”

  “Do you have a big family?” She took his hand and they climbed off the bed.

  “Just a brother and sister. I’m the baby.” He winked. “How about you?”

  She shook her head but didn’t answer. She studied the carpet as if she wanted to disappear through it.

  “Weren’t ready to meet my family yet, huh?”

  Jaycee looked up and smiled, a little weakly, but it was a smile.

  “It’ll be fine. They’re not too scary.” Tyler squeezed her hand encouragingly.

  He led her through the apartment to open the door to Donnell, who stood in the hallway, tossing his keys in the air. “It’s about time.”

  Shanay spun around, and when she caught sight of Jaycee, she crossed her arms and wrinkled her nose. Her eyes traveled to Jaycee’s shoes and back up.

  Jaycee’s hand tightened, but she didn’t cower or hide behind him. Tyler squeezed back in encouragement.

  “Donnell, Shanay, this is Jaycee Hanson. Jaycee, meet my big brother and sister.” Donnell gave her one of his winning smiles and shook Jaycee’s outstretched hand, but Shanay only glowered.

  “I’ve got jumper cables,” Jaycee ignored Shanay’s scowl and spoke to Donnell. Tyler smiled with pride. Shanay liked to throw her weight around. Thank God Jaycee didn’t simper. “Do you want to try—?”

  “You think we’re stupid?” Shanay uncrossed her arms only to plant her fists on her hips. “Think we didn’t try that first?” She snorted and looked down her nose in disgust.

  “Lay off, Shanay.” Donnell tried to steer his sister toward the stairs, but Shanay wouldn’t move.

  “I want to talk to you, Tyler.” Shanay gave Jaycee another long look from head to toe, then spun around and stomped through the open door and into Tyler’s apartment, leaving the other three standing in the hallway, but not without one last snarl over her shoulder. “Alone.”

  Tyler shook his head as his sister disappeared into his kitchen. He offered Jaycee a smile. “Don’t worry.” He brought her hand up and kissed her knuckles. “She’ll settle down once she gets to know you.”

  “Ty!” Shanay shouted from inside the apartment.

  Tyler groaned. “Donnell, you need to rein in your little sister.”

  “If Mom couldn’t do it, what makes you think I can?” Donnell grinned. “Come on, you know how she is. She knows what’s best for everyone.” He leaned back against Tyler’s neighbor’s door and tossed his keys. “Just go talk to her. Tell her to mind her own business so we can get out of here.”

  Tyler rolled his eyes. “I’ll be right back,” he told Jaycee. “Try to decide where you want to eat.”

  Her smile was a bit stiff, but he’d have to explain Shanay later. And Chrissy. And anything else she wanted to know.

  Jaycee pushed her hands in her pockets, then pulled them out and clasped them in front of her. She’d never met Shanay. She didn’t have the slightest idea what she was like, yet the woman had judged Jaycee with one look. Embarrassment warred with offense, leaving Jaycee feeling about two inches tall and transparent. Did she expect to be welcomed into Tyler’s world with open arms?

  Yes, she had. After only a few hours together, they were faced with the first obstacle and it made her cringe at the untried boundaries of their new and fragile relationship.

  Relationship? Are you crazy? An afternoon filled with sex didn’t constitute a relationship. Sure, they had a mutual attraction, but was that enough to base a relationship on? Any closeness she felt to Tyler could easily be attributed to a sexual high. Afterglow even. Lust definitely.

  Shit. She used to make fun of women who tried to turn a sexual encounter into a long-term relationship. Now here she was pouting about an afternoon delight? Hell, I don’t need—

  “You’re in Ty’s psych class, right?”

  Jaycee jerked her chin up to face Donnell, who continued tossing his keys with a practiced flick of his wrist. He probably only had a few inches on Tyler, but his lean form made him look even taller.

  “That’s right. How did you—”

  “We saw you a few weeks ago in the gym. He pointed you out. Said you were smart.”

  Heat rushed to her cheeks. Tyler pointed her out? All this time she’d been hiding behind fitness equipment and under the lap-pool water, but he’d seen her anyway. How often had he caught her staring?

  Wait. Smart? Jaycee hid a pleased smile.

  “Hey, do you play softball?” He snatched the keys out of the air and shoved them in his pocket.

  The topic change threw her off, but any conversation would drown out the one going on in Tyler’s apartment so she eagerly answered. “It’s been awhile, but it’s probably like riding a bike, right?”

  He grinned. “We’re getting a co-ed team together. The season starts in two weeks, but we start practice tomorrow afternoon. We really need some girls who know how to play. And I need an outfielder. Wanna join us?” His dark eyes shone against his dark face.

  Jaycee smiled back. His enthusiasm was contagious. “That sounds fun. At the intramural fields?”

  “Yeah. Just ride with Ty, he’s our shortstop. We’ll probably hit Lucky’s afterwards for a few drinks.”

  She opened her mouth to agree.

  “A white girl?” Shanay’s voice rang clear, even through the thin wall separating them. “Jesus, Ty, you can’t be that hard up.”

  Tyler’s response wasn’t as clear. Only the word “not” was loud enough for her to hear. Jaycee shut her mouth with a click. The heat left her face. In fact a chill washed over her and settled in her gut.

  “Oh, here she goes.” Donnell rubbed the back of his neck with a smirk. “She’s not always like this. She just likes to go off on these rants.”

  “Fuck that, Ty,” Shanay continued, “I’ve got some friends I can hook you up with. If you’re just looking for a quick lay, that’s fine. Just don’t get attached to some damn Barbie girl. You owe it to your sisters. Let Barbie find a nice white boy to fuck with.” Shanay obviously didn’t care if she was overheard.

  Jaycee wanted to sink through the floor. Suddenly she was the minority, and this was her first taste of racism. She’d been judged by the color of her skin alone. Her chest tightened painfully. Not a pleasant feeling.

  She pulled her lower lip between her teeth. Was this something she had to look forward to? She wasn’t worried about her own friends and family, but then she hadn’t expected a backlash from Tyler’s.

  “I don’t care if she can hear me. I’ll say the same thing to her face. I just want you to know—”

  “I’ll be right back,” Donnell mumbled, then walked through the door. “Hey, hey…do you mind? What the hell, Shan?”

  When she was alone, Jaycee leaned against the hallway wall, shut her eyes and took a deep breath. Color burned her cheeks and she covered them with her chilled hands. What was Tyler thinking? Would he listen to Shanay? Was he in there thinking what a huge mistake he’d made? Wondering how to get rid of her?

  No. Somehow Jaycee knew he wouldn’t. Even Donnell seemed to accept her, and he was able to quiet his sister down since she could no longer hear the conversation.

  Jaycee edged toward the stairs. She’d just sit on the curb outside. That would spare Tyler the embarrassment of knowing she’d heard every word.

  Even as she slipped outside and closed the door behind her with a soft click, she knew she wouldn’t sit on the curb. She hated herself more with each step she took, but walked two blocks in record time.

  Coward.

  Chapter Four

  She stared out the passenger window of Elaine’s car, watching her fellow students rushing home from their afternoon classes to prepare for their Friday night. Thankfully her roommate didn’t ask for details, she just picked Jaycee up at the corner without further comment. Just a quick question as to her well-being, and she even changed the radio to country-western before driving silently back to the house. Thank God for f
riends like Elaine.

  She’d snuck away from Tyler. Like a little kid, she’d run.

  She’d walked the first few blocks, checking over her shoulder and expecting to see him behind her. She even thought her phone might ring any second until she remembered that she hadn’t given him her phone number. Nor did she have his. Perfect for a one-night stand. Well, one afternoon. And not just once.

  The day’s events played through her mind. It was almost surreal. If it wasn’t for the whisker burns on her breasts and the soreness between her thighs, she could almost believe it was all a dream.

  But she could still taste him on her lips and smell him on her skin. She sighed. The car’s air conditioner helped cool her face as she watched the campus roll by.

  It was a fling. A delicious, fantasy-drowning, dream-inspiring fling. Sure he said he’d get in touch with her, but he wasn’t exactly thinking clearly. He’d be thankful that she’d been the one to end the evening. No awkward goodbye at her front door, no wondering if he’d ask for her number. Or not. This was definitely the best way to end it. And she’d made it back to the house for spaghetti.

  “Sure you’re okay?” Elaine shut off the engine, but the twangy country music continued.

  “I’m fine.” Jaycee hoped her smile was convincing. “Everyone should have a no-strings-attached fling.”

  “You know I’m going to want details.”

  This time, her smile was genuine. Elaine had suffered through Jaycee’s daydreams about Tyler for months. “Imagine Tyler Johnson in his ROTC uniform. Cool, confident, collected. Then picture him losing all that control…” Jaycee closed her eyes, grinning into the early evening sunshine as it streamed through the windshield. “And then he loses the uniform.”

  Elaine sat in silence for a few minutes. “Oh my.”

  “Exactly. Good enough to fuel a lifetime of fantasies.”

  Elaine gave her an encouraging smile. “I’m sure he’ll call you.”

  Jaycee stared at the juniper bush and didn’t respond. Eventually she’d tell Elaine the ugly truth. They hadn’t exchanged phone numbers. Or personal information.

  Just bodily fluids.

  Jaycee ducked her head to avoid the rest of her sorority sisters and headed straight for her room. I just need time. Refocus, Jaycee.

  She tore off her clothes—remembering how each item had passed through Tyler’s hands—and took a long look at herself in the mirror. She didn’t look any different. Still the same wavy blonde hair, maybe a bit messier than it was before psych class. Same blue eyes, though now hers seemed a bit glassy and feverish. So why did she feel like a different person than the girl who dressed in front of this very mirror?

  With a sigh, she kicked her clothes into her hamper then made her way to the shower. She stood beneath the hot water long after she’d rinsed the conditioner out of her hair. The water swirled down the drain, along with the last of Tyler’s scent. His kisses, even the slight abrasions below her navel, seemed to fade with the steamy suds. All she needed to do now was make it through dinner and maybe the chick flick in the rec room without letting on that Tyler Johnson owned her thoughts.

  She towel-dried her hair, a little rougher than necessary, and dressed in her favorite jeans. Was there anything wrong with indulging in thoughts of him? Like the way he massaged her foot during class? Those strong fingers engulfed the ball of her foot as if he taught a podiatry class. He’d treated each toe to a seduction, and then under the stairs, when her toes curled…

  Twenty minutes later she still sat on the edge of her bed, staring blankly at her television—which suddenly looked very small—with Tyler still on her mind.

  Lord, how was she going to face him in psychology class on Monday? Did she sit right beside him and act as though he was her best friend? That would be the saucy thing to do. It would get his attention for sure. Or should she just walk in and pretend nothing had happened between them? Just sit in the same chair, go back to the sit-and-drool routine that had worked for months before? That’s it. Treat him like any other acquaintance.

  The kind that gives out amazing orgasms.

  If she were a woman who had casual affairs all the time, that’s what she’d do. This is why she never went for a fling. She wasn’t cut out for this. She wouldn’t have had sex with him if she didn’t feel something for the guy.

  She could always sneak into another chair on the other side of the classroom.

  Jaycee flopped onto her bed to stare at the ceiling. Was he relieved when he came out of his kitchen and found her gone? Would he spend the evening with Donnell and Shanay laughing over his latest conquest? She rubbed her eyes. Maybe this was the plan. He’d sent a text message to call his brother and sister for help. When she wasn’t looking.

  Yeah, right. You’re turning paranoid.

  She flipped onto her stomach. No use bouncing back and forth. She’d just play it by ear. Walk into that classroom on Monday as if nothing happened. If he had something to say, she’d be polite. Not clingy, not snotty. Just a nice uncomplicated romp between the sheets. That’s it. Resolve turned to relief and her shoulders were suddenly fifty pounds lighter. Maybe she could do this.

  She sat up and, rather than brushing her hair, she pulled it into a loose ponytail. There was no reason she’d need to leave the house again tonight—her sorority sisters would just have to look at her sans makeup.

  Oregano and garlic wafted up to her bedroom, stirring her out of her thoughts. Just as she slipped into a comfortable pair of shoes, her housemate Cassidy poked her head around Jaycee’s bedroom door.

  “Jaycee, someone wants to talk to you.” Cassidy hailed from New York, so her voice lacked the musical quality of the rest of the Texans, making her sound either bored or pissed.

  Jaycee straightened her clothes and thanked Cassidy on her way to the hall telephone. Strange how she didn’t even hear it ring. Who used landlines anyway?

  “Huh uh.” Cassidy stopped her before she could pick up the receiver. “Not on the phone.”

  Jaycee raised an eyebrow. “What…?”

  “Follow me.” Cassidy walked into the room she shared with another sorority sister, Jenny. “He actually threw pebbles at the window. He gets props for the romance.” Cassidy grinned.

  He? Jaycee’s heart lurched to her throat and she crossed the room to the window that was opened to the garden below.

  Her vision blurred as she tried to talk herself out of hoping that it was Tyler. It could be Jimmy, the stocker at the grocery store who followed her around like a puppy dog throughout her shifts.

  “Hello?” She poked her head through the window.

  “There you are.” Tyler stood behind a bush, his grin showing stark in the dim afternoon shadows from the backyard hedge. “I didn’t know which window was yours.”

  “What…what are you doing?” She gripped the curtains with a suddenly sweaty palm.

  “Looking for you. Can you come down?”

  Jaycee glanced back at her friends, the owners of the window. Cassidy had a big grin and two thumbs up; Jenny let her tongue fall out of her mouth like a cartoon wolf and wagged her eyebrows.

  She folded her arms, partly to hide her pounding heart. Cool. No strings attached. Remember? “I was just getting settled in for the night.”

  “Oh.” He grinned naughtily. “So can I come up?”

  Jenny and Cassidy giggled loud enough for him to hear. She sent both of them a glare, then an apologetic smile down to Tyler. “It’s against house rules.”

  “Then come down here. I won’t keep you too long. I just want to talk to you.”

  Jaycee bit her lip. She’d just resigned herself to letting him go. Did she really want to take the leap? Was she ready for whatever speed bumps might come? She glanced at her sorority sisters. Cassidy waved her hand in the universal “get on with it” motion, and Jenny gave her the “why are you even thinking twice?” look, with her furrowed brow and wide eyes.

  “I’m not leaving until we talk.” Tyler’s det
ermination wasn’t hidden by the shadows. His lips had thinned, barely moving with his words. “Either you come down, or I’m coming up.”

  She wasn’t into domination. Forceful guys never turned her on. In fact she could easily imagine telling any other man to fuck off if he spoke to her that way. With Tyler’s words sinking into her chest and squeezing tight, she had to fight the inclination to strip naked and shimmy down the drainpipe.

  “Okay.” The word slipped out as she debated it, and as soon as she realized she had spoken aloud, one hand flew to her hair. God, she was a mess.

  Her sorority sisters squealed all the way back to Jaycee’s room, and the three of them managed to brush through her hair and change her into a tank top.

  “We’ll make sure the old lady is occupied.” Cassidy picked a piece of lint from Jaycee’s shoulder.

  “And we’ll make your excuses at dinner,” Jenny giggled.

  Before she knew it, Jaycee had been pushed outside onto the wide porch. She could still hear their muted excitement through the thick oak door.

  “Hey.” Tyler’s voice preceded him from the shadows of the willow trees.

  Jaycee walked as calmly as she could down the steps, stopping a foot away to take him in. He was so damn hot. With his baggy blue jeans and a white ribbed sleeveless tee shirt, he looked more like a rap singer than a college senior and ROTC captain. Did she really spend hours having sex with this man? Jaycee was sure her blush tinted her hair pink.

  He opened his arms and grinned, his dark eyes gleaming. “What, don’t you remember me?”

  It took about two heartbeats for her to shove back the last of her reservations, and she almost stumbled to get into his embrace. Already his arms felt like home. He rocked her as she buried her nose in his thin shirt. He must have showered as well. She sucked great amounts of his scent into her lungs. With a sigh, she asked, “How did you find me?”

  “It’s the information age. All I need is your name and I can find all kinds of dirt.”

  Jaycee paled. “Uh…”

  “I’m kidding,” he laughed and kissed her forehead. “You wear your sorority tee shirt to class sometimes.”