Without Rhythm (The Lament)

by P. S. Power

  "Uh... Then I heard something. A woman yelled that he had to stop, because she was a Guardian and then that there were others. He didn't though. It was like he didn't care at all. Then something happened and he was off me. I couldn't tell what. It was so dark, until the big Guardian came. He made a fire of some kind that made it like day." She stopped talking then for a moment, then sobbed a few times before going on.

  "I think he was going to kill me. The Creedy. Like they did Jenny's Ma when she didn't just go silent about her being used."

  Judge Claire looked at Yarl.

  "We cannot speak as to intent here. Apprentice Guardian Pran, Guardian Clark, please come forward." She gestured for them to stand next to the accuser, which made the whole scene seem a little lopsided, but worked to influence the audience. It looked like authority was coming down on the one side, without ever saying so directly.

  It was pretty clever actually. Pran approved and climbed down quickly, the crowd around her parting. She didn't put the rifle down though. The meat cleaver man was still working his way forward. Now she couldn't see him either, no matter how hard she focused. There were just too many bodies in the way.

  "Apprentice Guardian Pran, can you tell us what you saw and heard last night?"

  Before she could speak someone from the crowd, a woman at the back, called out loudly.

  "That's Pran from the art school. She isn't a Guardian... She's a Bard. I heard her play at the school show last month..." Several of the other people agreed, some loudly.

  Claire smiled.

  "Things can alter quickly. Pran? Could you tell us exactly what happened last night, starting with what you first noticed and why you were there?"

  Pran had to make herself not glare at the woman. Apparently it wasn't enough to have stopped the rape, or even to be shown a liar, claiming to be something she wasn't. No, she had to give the whole thing away in public.

  "Ah, well... I was kicked out of art school yesterday, divested of everything, so I was sort of trying to find someone to sell myself too, for food money. I wasn't doing too well, and then I heard it. At first I thought the man was telling me not to move, but it wasn't that." Then she finished it all, including outright that she lied when she claimed to be a Guardian, which got a strange look from Meridith.

  She wasn't called a liar at any point at least, having kept exactly to the truth as she remembered it, ending with Clark having her restrain the man.

  Then she stopped talking, not wanting to mess anything else up.

  The Judge looked at Clark then and asked a similar question.

  "I first became aware of a problem as Guardian Mara and I were escorting our charge back toward The Lament, our airship transport. There was an obvious commotion and then someone called out that they were a Guardian and that she had back up. It's customary for all Guardians in an area to provide such in emergency situations, so Mara and I moved to secure the scene. After setting off an illuminating flare we saw that there was a woman being physically beaten by that man," he pointed directly at Yarl and held it until Claire nodded at him, her face looking smooth and a little blank.

  "Then we realized that the Guardian on the scene wasn't one. At that time I made a field decision to offer her the position, which would become active as soon as she was legally sixteen, if accepted. She later did that, her birthday being today. The crime of claiming to be a Guardian falsely would not have applied anyway, being a minor at the time and would have likely been overlooked, given that she was simply using the term to attempt to protect another who was in mortal danger. She then listened to instructions and subdued the attacker on her own, sustaining knife wounds in the process."

  It made the whole thing sound funny to Pran, but she waited then, noticing that the meat cleaver man was holding back for some reason. Waiting.

  "Stand by for Judgment."

  Claire closed her eyes for several minutes, finally speaking loud enough for the whole crowd to hear easily.

  "Let it be known to all present that Yarl Creedy did, with full intent and foreknowledge, rape Meridith Foil. For that crime, he is now sentenced to seven years of labor and to retraining for a time after that until he is deemed safe for society. Town guard, please secure him."

  Creedy, realizing that things had definitely not gone his way, tried to run. It was a mistake, since about a dozen men jumped him, and held him in place while the older guardsman put him in chains. They weren't gentle with him after that either, though no one openly beat him. He screamed, his language bad enough that one of the men hit him in the back of the head. That didn't stop him.

  "I'll kill you! Lying bitch! You won't live to see another sunrise!"

  Who he was talking to though Pran couldn't tell.

  The rest of the trial was a lot less dynamic for her personally. Even when she had to explain that she'd shot the two Creedy brothers almost at random, not actually having any kind of skill at it. That... got a laugh from the people around them for some reason. It didn't seem mean particularly. It was only as if they appreciated her having managed it. No one even called her a murderer, not even the other Creedy brothers as they were each sentenced to four years labor for their individual crimes. Trying to break their brother free for the most part.

  They didn't seem pleased by it, but it did seem to put an end to the idea that anyone would be killed by them in retribution anytime soon.

  The townspeople weren't exactly happy after it was done, but there was a sense of relief from some of them. The man with the meat cleaver was gone, having vanished into the crowd, but no one was being hacked to death at that point, so hopefully he felt like it was enough punishment, to start with at least. No one cheered, or congratulated them for a job well done. No clapping or bowing after it was over either.

  Pran definitely preferred performing. It was no harder and if you did a good job of it, everyone seemed to like you afterwards. These people barely looked at them. Most of them scurried away like they were afraid they'd be charged with something next in fact.

  They went back more slowly, the five kilometers a lot harder this time, for Pran at least, since she was set to doing the walking guard which meant running, paying total attention and trying to move without a pattern the whole time. It wasn't just hard, it felt impossible. Her mind simply refused to let herself move that way, forcing her to stop and start at random to try and throw things off. On top of that it was physically way more difficult than just running or dancing. The uneven movements required so much more of her that a few minutes into it she was gasping horribly. At ten minutes Mara took over, doing it all easily as Pran got settled next to Paul, sucking in air like a bellows.

  She didn't even try to talk, just feeling a little ill the whole time. The second she finished catching her breath Mara traded out with her again, not even breathing hard.

  "Keep your attention level up. Also, your movement is still too rhythmic. Keep going." She grinned when she said it, as if it were a joke or something.

  Pran ran, making every effort to be random, but finding it even harder when she occasionally got it close to right. Her body ached, especially her lungs and chest, though her hips were coming in a close second. Just before she felt like she'd have to stop and vomit she got another break.

  "That's fine for today. When we get back you can do something easy for a while. Laundry maybe?" Mara didn't give her a chance to do or say anything, darting to the side, then dropping out of view almost instantly. She showed up again after a few seconds, but was too hard to track for it to be worthwhile.

  The rest of the trip back she rode, breathing hard almost the whole time, not speaking. Paul didn't complain or talk to her at all. After a few minutes she picked up her rifle, trying to stay ready, even as she had to fight to pay attention to everything again. It was much harder after working like that. Her brain started buzzing, ideas coming into play full bore.

  A new song occurred to her then, an instrumental thing that had dropped beats in it, the pattern made up of missi
ng steps. It would work well on guitar she thought, trying to hold it in memory before she realized that she wasn't a Bard anymore. Not even a student. It was hard, but she had to let it all go and do what was in front of her as well as she could. It was pretty obvious to her why no one wanted to become a Guardian at least. It wasn't just dangerous and hard, it hurt. She hadn't even learned to fight yet and her body was screaming at her.

  Of course, now that the trial was over, they didn't need her anymore. What Clark had said kind of made some sense at the time, about how by making her an apprentice she was given legal protection from her false claims. There was no need for them to keep her on in that position now, was there? It was probably just as well. She really doubted she'd survive another few days of this.

  It was about dinner time when they got back to the ship, which would be taking off directly after the meal. They could fly in the dark after all. As long as they didn't land it was even safe enough. Captain Mina ate with her officers and Judge Claire, but she made a point of stopping by the table with Mara and Clark at it before she left to help take off.

  "Next stop Danning, which we should reach in less than a day. Unless you two need something special between here or there?"

  Mara shook her head, chewing a beef strip slowly. They were good, but it was as if she were actually thinking about what to say.

  "I think we're fine in this area. Around the large cities we run into more energy abuse problems. Those in smaller towns tend not to be as greedy that way for some reason." She smiled and took another bite as the Captain waved a bit and walked off, her question answered.

  The female Guardian looked at Pran for a moment before speaking, her large companion just eating quietly, the scars on his face moving rhythmically.

  "Guardians have two main jobs. One is as you've seen, but is the lesser task. We guard officials at need. That part is a lot more varied than it looks like here, though this is good experience for a new apprentice. As often as not we stand around watching council members of various kinds that no one wants to harm at all. Our real job is making sure that no one harms the world. People tend to think they deserve more than just a living, and some will always try to take more than they need. In a way that's what happened with the Creedy's in town. They discovered that numbers gave them power and felt that should mean they could do whatever they wanted.

  "Everyone is like that, unless they stop themselves. If they can't, it's our job to do it for them. When we get to Danning we'll do an assessment first, to discover if anyone is using too many resources, or too much energy. If they are we'll probably give them a warning and help them to find other ways to do what they want, that or to let go of a greedy or useless idea. If they can't, or won't, then we stop them using other means. That can be anything up to death, but it's normally a fine. We'll have to teach you what kind of things to look for in the field and how to handle them when they come up. Normally you'd already have had classes on this kind of thing, but..."

  She shrugged.

  Clark swallowed and actually smiled. It wasn't a huge thing, but it was real enough.

  "For now, since it isn't late, you can have a bit of a break. A few hours to see to whatever you'd like before bed. Please remember to keep up your mental exercises however. The fastest way to adapt is to never release the pressure your mind is under."

  It was less than fun, but Pran made herself do it, trusting that these people wouldn't keep harping on the idea if it wasn't important. She didn't have anything to do after that, so just sat for a minute while everyone else left the room. The crew had to see to the tie lines and take off, and the Guardians had their own concerns.

  That meant that Bard Benjamin, Doctor Millis and Judge Claire just stayed in the eating area too, the Bard grinning as the ship slowly listed, the room tilting by several feet, but the chairs not moving, since they were part of the floor.

  "Alright everyone, would you like a special treat, since no one else is watching?" He gave Claire a conspiratorial look and pulled out his guitar, which he tuned carefully, then walked over to Pran slowly holding it out.

  "If you would?"

  Pran nearly said no. It seemed almost cruel to make her do it, but there was a need for it. These others, the respectable Doctor and the Judge needed to know that she hadn't been kicked out of school because she was a poor performer. That would be the most obvious reason after all. She took it and set herself, trying to stay totally focused, but finding that her world narrowed as she did it.

  Then she played as if it were the most important thing she'd ever done.

  The song was one she'd written about a year before. An instrumental piece that had complicated fingerings and very regular timing. She hadn't noticed that before, since all music was like that, but now she couldn't help it. All that strange running and paying attention was already having an effect.

  When the song ended she paused for ten seconds, which was the normal time for such things and started singing a simple children's tune. It took her three passes, but the first was played the way everyone knew it, her voice sweet and young sounding. The nursery rhyme about animals and playing a game of chase sounding the way it was normally thought of.

  Then without changing a single word, the song changed, new emphasis on each word making it darker, a dangerous thing that would haunt the memories of those that heard it. The song wasn't about animals playing a game at all. It was about death chasing a town. A plague that stole the life from even the most innocent.

  Then she went through it again, going back to the simple children's version.

  The next song was just her version of the popular song "Say Hey". When she stopped no one said anything for a long time. It was always an awkward thing for her when people did that. Did they like it or not? Had she suddenly gotten so bad that no one would ever talk to her again? Was it something else? She had to refrain from looking over her shoulders then, but an actual noise caught her attention. It was Mara, with Clark standing next to her, each holding weapons.

  That and cleaning kits.

  Clark grunted at her, looking less than pleased for some reason. For a few seconds Pran wondered if he found her music offensive, he looked so disgusted. It wasn't that. Not at all.

  "So, do we know why they decided to destroy her career the day before she was to be shipped off? I can't imagine that an accidentally broken leg was the real reason. The boy didn't seek to press charges and from the sound of it, he'd have lost even if he had. An accident is, after all, just an accident."

  Ben took the instrument back and started plinking a little tune on it absently, background music for the conversation.

  "I talked to the Headmaster of the school earlier, to try and figure out that very thing. It isn't a big mystery. The school council is made of three people. Two of them are related to a young Bard named Ricards, who will be graduating next month. He apparently isn't as good as Pran, but is still quite serviceable. By getting rid of the competition he'll have a better chance of having a good appointment. Perhaps even a top choice. There's a rumor that Bard Clarice is looking for an apprentice. Anyone getting that position will pretty much have their career made for them. She's the head Bard after all. It would mean all the best parties and connections. It seems that the Headmaster was told, in no uncertain terms that this would be Ricards. When he suggested that it be taken on merit, as it always has been, there was a sudden change in the harshness of punishments. None as difficult as what Pran is undergoing however."

  No one said anything for a few minutes, but Pran felt a fine and cool anger rise from the pit of her stomach and finally stood.

  "That... I'll..." The thing was, she couldn't do anything to them for it. The school council was the final word on things like that, as far as she knew. It didn't seem fair at all, but she didn't have a real way to stop them. It wasn't like she could call on her family connections to fight them.

  She plunked down and shook her head.

  "I..." For the first time since the whole thing ha
d started she cried. Large tears rolling over her cheeks at the unfairness of it all, she didn't sob though. After all, she hadn't been raped. No she'd only been robbed of her future.

  Just to get a little bit more for a family member, those evil people had taken her life away. Everything she'd worked for was just gone now and nothing she could do would ever change it. Her heart hurt, but Doctor Millis just walked over to where she sat, and sunk into the chair next to her.

  "There, there... don't worry overly. We'll simply contact the Bard's regional council and see if this can't be fixed. We can do that, can't we?" He looked over his glassed at the others, getting a nod from them all.

  Bard Benjamin gave a small smile.

  "That should do it. If not we have a few other things to try first. If nothing else we can have Pran play all over this sector, until everyone demands to know why she isn't a full Bard. We should hold off on that one, give the government a chance to fix this reasonably first."

  It was a bit of hope and Pran took it, even knowing that for an orphan like her there probably wasn't a lot anyone would be willing to do.

  Ricards would win, because he had people that had to look out for him.

  She just didn't have that and never would.

  Not now.

  Her one real shot at making something of herself had been taken away.

  Now all she had left was one slim thread to dangle from, this fake apprenticeship, which could snap at any time.

  Chapter seven

  The easy thing to do would have been to just give up on hearing the news that things were as stacked against her as it seemed. Pran knew that never worked though. She'd seen it, over and over. People got a rough deal and then stopped trying. It could be an unfair grade in school, or not being picked to be adopted at the orphanage. Those people didn't do well at all. They gave up, and things just got worse for them, until they found the bottom of where the world was allowing them to go.

  She wasn't at that point yet.