by Matson, TC
“Hi.”
“Want some Chinese?” Holly asks. “We have more in the fridge.”
“Nah. I grabbed something up the road a bit ago. Thanks.”
The three of them continue to play catch up as I remain quiet and eat. All this brings back painful memories I’m not quite ready to face, and instead of running away from it, I’m walking. Straight to her kitchen for a glass of wine. It will ease my tension.
“How are you?” Ryker asks sneaking up beside me.
I offer a smile. “Good.”
He nods. “Good. That’s good to hear. I’m sorry about you and Levi.”
I take a sip of the wine. “It’s okay,” I lie.
“You sure?”
“Yeah. I’m positive.” Please. Please tell me you can’t read my lies.
“Just checking.”
I rock back on my heel and lean the wine glass against my cheek. “When did you start giving a damn, Ryker? Or are you wanting something?”
His dimples emerge and a shudder rolls down my spine. “From the start and yes.”
“Yeah right, and what?”
“You’re sassy.”
I shake my head. “Please don’t tell me that. I’ve heard it enough.” Not to mention that was Levi’s favorite phrase for me. “And what?” I repeat.
“Dinner tomorrow night. And before you jump to conclusions, it’s not a date,” he hurries out.
I narrow my eyes. “Then what will it be called?”
“Friends eating?” he replies.
I lean toward him. “Don’t we have to be friends?”
He chuckles. “What if Matt and Holly go?”
“It’s still a date. That’s just called a double date.”
“I’m down!” Holly yells from the living room.
Ryker’s icy blue eyes flicker with a flirty mischief as he stares at me waiting for the answer.
“I’m not interested. But thanks for the invite,” I respond.
“Oh, for fuck’s sake. Come with us. Get out and live a little. You have nothing more going on,” Holly once again adds her two cents.
“Yeah, Paige. Live a little,” Ryker whispers to me.
“If you don’t recall, I’ve fallen for this act before,” I whisper back. “I’m seriously not interested.”
“I just want to buy you dinner. You don’t even have to talk to me if you don’t want to. It would be nice if you did though.”
I sigh. “Holly? You and Matt going?”
“Sure ‘nuff,” she calls out.
“Fine.” I poke him in his chest. His very hard chest. “No funny business.”
He sticks out his pinky. “I promise.”
The gesture rocks something inside of me. I wrap my little pinky around his large one. “You can’t break these.”
“I’ve always kept my word.” Oh, hell, the tone of his voice. It’s seductive and mysterious.
Chapter 28
I can’t remember the last time I was this nervous. I know I shouldn’t be, but I am. I’m jamming out to some heavy metal as I pull up to Holly’s apartment hoping that this will ease the nervousness. But as I walk up the stairs with these shaky ass knees, I realize it’s done nothing to help.
Everyone agreed that Ryker would drive and we would take his truck. I almost needed help getting into this gorgeous thing. It’s a black Tundra that’s been lifted with large tires and black wheels. It has a mean looking front end. And that’s just the outside. The inside is silver with black leather. I think I now want a Tundra instead of a Tahoe. This thing is stunning.
Now that we’re sitting in the restaurant, this feels awkward and incredibly weird. Holly and Matt are sitting across from each other, which places Ryker in front of me. The white clothed table is small, made more for a romantic night. This isn’t one of those nights for me.
Matt and Holly, although at the same table, have disappeared into their own world leaving me to fend for myself with Ryker, who by the way looks exceptionally good tonight. He’s in a pair of rugged dark jeans with a navy blue t-shirt under a light blue button up long sleeve shirt which is rolled up to his elbows. It shows off his tattooed arms and pulls the electric out of his eyes.
“Are you okay?” he asks.
“Um, yeah. It’s weird,” I admit.
“Two friends, Paige. There’s nothing funky going on,” he reassures me.
“I know. Still feels…ugh.”
He laughs. “Is ugh good? Please tell me it is.”
“Different.”
“Ah, she smiles.” He bounces his finger. “I’ve told you before you’re more exquisite when you smile.”
I blush and drop my head to hide it.
“Did you like the flowers I sent you?” he asks.
I forgot about that. Several days after Levi and I had broken up, Ryker sent me a bouquet of spring flowers and a card. The gesture was sweet, but it broke my heart.
“I did, thank you. But why a get well soon card?”
He nearly spits out his beer. “I forgot I had done that. I’ve had my heart broken before, so I know what it feels like. You’re half dead, like a bad case of pneumonia. So, get well soon seemed point on.”
A flashback of the pain hits me. I didn’t feel half dead. I felt like I was dying.
“Snap out of it.” He leans over the table. “Come back to now. Don’t step backward.”
I shake my head. “Yeah. I wandered down a dark path.”
The waiter brings our food and the table goes silent. I about orgasm off my first bite of steak. My eyes roll back and I moan. I haven’t had a great steak in a long time. Ryker’s gaze is heated and voracious. He clears his throat and focuses back on his plate once he registers he’s been busted.
“Don’t look at me like that,” I advise him with a stern look.
He looks up from his food with a good-for-nothing grin. “Don’t tell me what I can and cannot do,” he says in a very matter-of-fact tone. “You’re a very beautiful woman. Add it with that moan, and there’s no way I can control the thoughts that just ran through my mind. The fact I didn’t voice them grants you the respect you’re demanding.”
He finishes his sentence and looks back to his plate scooping up another bite of mashed potatoes. I’m in awe, mouth gaped and all. He politely just slapped me across the face.
“How is it?” Holly chimes in beside me.
“Good,” I tell her.
“Yeah? I thought you’d like this place. Matt brought me here several weeks ago and I all but jumped him at the table with how good the food is.”
I nearly spit my food in her face. She’s never scared to voice her opinion. “I can assure you, I’m not tackling you.”
She scrunches her nose playfully. “Thank goodness. I couldn’t please you both tonight.”
I laugh again, thankfully without food in my mouth when she leans really close and whispers. “I’m tickled to see you smiling. Love you.” She winks then straightens up in her seat turning her attention back to Matt.
Her words warm me. Although forcing myself to face the world, I am picking up the pieces little by little to get myself back to me.
Ryker insisted on paying for my dinner, which of course automatically made it feel like a date. And I hate that. I know he was trying to be polite—gentleman-like—but I was set on just allowing it to be a “friendly” dinner. Naive of me, I know.
Afterward, we came back to Holly’s apartment where I’ve been sitting at the end of the couch sipping a glass of wine. I can’t have more than one glass since I have to drive home. I know my limit.
The conversation has spanned from the dinner to what our favorite animals are. I’ve laughed, I’ve been silent, and I’ve had flashbacks to different and better days, but all in all it’s been fun.
Ryker is sitting on the loveseat in perfect line of sight. Truth be told he’s wondrous on the eyes. He’s sleek, sharp, and extremely good looking, not to mention the deep tone of his voice thunders, sending shivers through my body. It isn
’t a bad shiver, but instead, one you wish you could experience over and over almost guaranteeing you an orgasm from just the hum. I’ve watched his mouth move as he talks. Stared at him when he’s not looking, soaking in the sight of him. He’s very muscular, a broad chest, large arms, and a torso that slims down into his hips. I can almost bet money he has that mouth-watering V.
As odd as his hair looks, I don’t think anything else would look right on him. His eyes shine from across the room, his smile is contagious, his jaw is strong…
And I’ve got to go. I shouldn’t be thinking this way. It’s Ryker. A fighter. One who will be going against my ex-boyfriend soon.
I jump to my feet. “I’m gonna get going,” I announce heading toward the kitchen.
I set the glass in the sink and gasp when I turn, running right into Ryker’s chest. Glancing up with wide surprised eyes, I’m greeted with a charming smile. Holly’s kitchen is a typical apartment kitchen. It’s not big enough to hold two, let alone one who’s broad and heavy with muscles.
“Excuse me,” he says sliding past me.
I lean my body away, but not far enough and our hips graze causing an explosion of freaked-outness to shatter my mind. I shove forward, quickly trying to get away from the close proximity, and in the rush I trip over my own shoe and fall.
A strong arm wraps around my waist catching me in mid-fall and preventing me from hitting the floor. “You’ll have to work on your landings,” Ryker chuckles behind my right ear, pulling me back to my feet.
“Please let go of me,” I say quietly and embarrassed down to my soul.
He splays his hand across my stomach, pulling my back into his chest. A shudder runs the length of my body and goosebumps spread across my skin.
But that very feeling turns into fire. I twist around and shove him in his chest. “Don’t you ever put your hands on me again,” I bark.
He looks amused. “I could have let you fall.”
“You know damn good and well what I’m talking about.”
He cocks an eyebrow flashing a pretty boy smirk. “Just because you enjoyed that doesn’t mean you should take it out on me.”
“Fuck off,” I huff and turn on my heel.
Striding around the island, I snatch my purse off the couch and head for the door. “I’ll talk to you later, Holly,” I say over my shoulder continuing right out the door. I don’t look back while I hightail it down the stairs.
I jerk open my car door, fall into the seat, and shove the key into the ignition. My heartbeat is ridiculous and my breaths are excessive. I drop my head to my hand and pinch the bridge of my nose.
I don’t understand what I’m feeling. I’m not interested in dating him. I don’t want to get involved in the game again, more importantly his game. I hate myself for being attracted to him, a man I can barely stand being around. Not because he’s a jerk, but because I can’t find a damn thing wrong with him. It’s all so fucked.
Voices catch my attention and I open my eyes to see the trio—Holly, Matt, and Ryker—walking past the front of my car. Holly’s on Matt’s arm giggling, too enthralled to notice me, but Ryker…he has. His hands are in his pockets as he strolls a few steps behind, studying me with an alarming amount of concern. Our gazes lock until the relentless turmoil bombards me, overwhelming my senses. I look away, slamming my car in reverse, and leave.
I’m seeing things. Hallucinating the idea of wishful thinking. He’s not Levi and I know the thought is what I’m grasping at. I miss Levi so terribly and he’s the closest thing resembling him. Yeah…that’s it.
Chapter 29
I’m getting dressed when I hear chatter coming from the living room. I cringe wondering which woman Blain brought home. Some of his normals can be so freaking annoying.
I toss my hair up in a mess of a bun and head out. And when I end the hallway, I skip a step seeing Lacy snuggled into Blain’s side on the couch wearing his shirt and a pair of shorts that swallow her whole.
“Hey.” I wave nonchalantly stepping into the kitchen. I don’t want to make a big deal over seeing Blain’s biggest crush nestled into his side.
“How’d your night go?” Blain calls out.
I pour my coffee and take a sip, leaning against the wall. “Good. Holly, Matt, and…” I grimace. I don’t know how he’ll feel about me spending time with Ryker. “They took me out to eat at this little restaurant downtown. Of course it isn’t as good as your cooking, but it’s a close second,” I add a little zing for Blain.
Using his chest for leverage, Lacy pushes up. “You cook?
Blain chuckles. “How long have we known each other?”
A strand of her blonde hair falls into her face and she tucks it behind her ear. “For years and you’ve cooked a few hamburgers for me a time or two, so I figured you just knew how to grill out.”
“Pffft.” I throw my hand at her. “That’s nothing. His breakfasts are delicious and his steak and shrimp are mouth-gasms.” I wink to a smiling Blain and leave them some privacy in my house to get ready for work.
I have to work the restaurant today, then Tonic tonight. Jim mixed up the schedule a bit. I work during the week on the weekends I’m off. I don’t mind it. It’s a different pace, but my main complaint about working during the week is that I don’t have Mason. I get stuck with either Marissa or Claire, both of which are great, but they’re not Mason great.
Only an hour left I repeat to myself over and over. Today has no in between. It’s either chaotic or flat dead. Holly has made it bearable with her silliness and her love-rants of Matt. She’s super stoked he has a high sex drive because apparently they’re like rabbits. She loves that he rubs her feet without being asked and the fact they haven’t spent but one day away from each other in two weeks. And she told me in a high-pitched excited squeal, “Ohmigod, we have toothbrushes at each other’s apartments. It’s totally official.”
It strange how an insignificant item such as a toothbrush actually holds power. It’s the ultimate item that differentiates between serious, not there yet, or no thank you. Seemingly just as important as that empty drawer in the dresser or the cleaned out spot in the closet. Actions do speak louder than words at times. What’s the meaning of “I love you” if you don’t show it? The three words are meaningless until you put forth the effort of showing it. All relationships are work—friendship, children, marriage, dating—really hard work.
“Hey, Daydreaming Beauty, you have a customer.” Holly nudges my shoulder tearing me away from the land I had disappeared to.
Shaking the thoughts out of my head, I straighten my apron. “Thanks.”
“I hope you had a hammock and a smoking hot cabana boy where ever you were.” She giggles placing ice in a cup.
“I think I was in a void of blackness,” I tell her. “Not a bad place, just empty thoughts.”
“I’m quite sure the void is about to be annihilated.” She rushes out of the kitchen area, leaving me without a clue of what she meant. I hate when she does that.
I round the corner and I’m smacked with the meaning of her sentence—Ryker. He’s in my section, alone, and the moment he sees me, the killer dimples emerge.
A burning tickling sensation runs across my shoulder blades as I approach him.
“How are you today?” he hums.
“Good. What can I get you?” I’m slightly irritated. I feel like I’m being pursued by a rerun from my past.
“Actually, I’d like to know when you get off work.”
I drop my arms to my side and sigh. “Please don’t do this to me,” I beg.
“What? Take a friend out before my life gets too hectic?”
“Ryker, we’re not friends. We’re acquaintances.”
“I’m trying to change that,” he says.
“With other intentions,” I add.
He shakes his head and holds out his hands to the side. “What’s so wrong with two people having fun? Paige, the other night was the first night you cut up with me. I’m not asking for a d
ate. I’m asking to hang out and have some fun.” He leans back in his chair. “You know, loosen up.”
I glare at him tapping my foot.
“Did you know I’ve never been to a drive-in movie theater? I didn’t know they still existed. There’s one forty-five minutes from here. I’d also like to check out the winery.”
I roll my eyes. “You don’t like wine.”
“I haven’t found a wine I enjoy. If you don’t want to go, fine. But let’s go do something.”
Flares are going off in my stomach warning me he’s up to something. “I hate to destroy whatever dreams you had for us tonight, but I have to go to work after here.”
“Directly after?” He’s burning with curiosity.
I cross my arms. “No. I have a few hours in between.”
I have a feeling I just messed up.
“Then I have the perfect idea. Wanna go?”
I look out the window into the sunshine and then back to him. He’s holding up his pinky with hope flickering in his eyes. “I promise no funny business.”
I gaze back outside and back to him and take his finger. “I feel like I’m making a deal with the devil. I get off in twenty.”
He stands from the seat and pats my shoulder. “I can be wicked at times, but this isn’t one of them. I’ll see you in a bit.”
Ryker was waiting for me in the parking lot when I got off work. He wouldn’t tell me where he was taking me even after I put up a small fight. He just promised we would have fun.
My mind wandered everywhere as he drove through town. I know this place like the back of my hand so I was trying to think of everything in front of us. Never in a million years would I have thought he’d bring me here—the arcade.
“No! No! Noooo,” he yells as he crashes his virtual car into the wall.
My stomach hurts from laughing. “Women drivers rule. Admit it!”
He slams the fake gear shifter and grips the steering wheel with both hands, dropping his chin and hardening his eyes on the screen. “Not if I can help it. I’m coming to get you.”