by M. J. O'Shea
“You know, Noah, your family’s wrong. I’m not the only person who’s safe around you. I don’t care what you are; you’d never hurt a thing. I mean, you’re still totally you, a big softie at heart.”
He chuckled a little and then sighed. “They’d never believe you. They think all vampires aren’t to be trusted. I don’t know if my parents would’ve even seen what you see. If they’d survived, I’m not sure if I would have been given a chance to be myself before they killed me.”
“Is it awful to say that I’m glad they’re dead, then? I hated not seeing you, but just the idea of you being gone for good gives me heart palpitations.”
He rubbed his nose against mine and gave me a slow kiss that had my heart pounding in a much more pleasant way. “Don’t worry, I’m not going anywhere for a long time. A very long time.”
Oh yeah. I’d forgotten that part. “So what, like, vampires are really immortal?”
“I’m not sure if it’s immortal or just extremely long-lived. But yeah, pretty much. There are vampires around here who saw the revolutionary war.”
“Are any of them like you? You know… nice?”
Noah smiled and ruffled my hair. “Of course. Doesn’t it seem impossible that any thinking species would be all heartless killers?”
“True.”
Noah shook his head. “You just accepted that so easily. I wish I could help my family see it. They are judging every vampire based on the lawless few.”
“Isn’t that the way people are a lot of the time?” It sucked. But it was true.
“Yeah. I suppose you’re right.”
“Hey, what do you guys do for food? The nice vampires, I mean. Animal blood?”
Noah made a disgusted face and gagged a little. “No, I tried it once out of curiosity. It was awful. We can still feed from humans without hurting them. There are places where you can find, uh, very willing snacks.”
“But wouldn’t you turn them? I mean, isn’t that how you get turned?”
“I did get turned from a bite, but that hardly ever happens by accident. You know how some animals have venom that stuns their prey?” I nodded. “Well, we do too, and it’s that venom that causes the turn to happen, like it did with me. I was lucky, though. Usually if a vampire chooses to shoot venom into someone, the person ends up dead before it would ever get a chance to work. But we can choose. The venom isn’t involuntary. If we don’t need it, like if the person is willing, then we don’t release it and no one is harmed.”
“But why would anyone be willing?”
Noah looked embarrassed. “I’m sure you’ve heard that vampire bites can be, um, pleasurable?”
I chuckled a little bit. “Yeah. So that part is true, obviously.”
“Very true. And the more the vampire likes the taste of a certain human, the better it is for the human. They can feel… well, it’s just good.” Noah blushed redder than I’d ever seen him.
I figured I’d pry the rest of that statement out of him sometime. I got the gist. “And there are places where these ‘willing’ people go to get bitten.”
Noah looked even more embarrassed. “Yeah. Want to know something weird, though? All human blood is definitely not the same. It took me a while to figure out what I liked, but I finally noticed that the taste for blood seems to run where your attractions lie. At least, mine does. Maybe it’s the pheromones or something. For example, I can tolerate the taste of female blood, but I don’t really like it. It’s kind of like what I remember diet pop tasting like; pretty bland with a weird aftertaste. But a hot guy’s blood? That’s like the best meal I ever had. It’s this high that takes hours to go away.”
A vivid picture of him biting the neck of some hot guy jumped into my head. I saw Noah’s fingers curling in the guy’s hair and his tongue licking a long line on the exposed neck before biting into it with those shiny fangs. It was hot but at the same time, it made a violent curl of jealously unravel in me.
“What was the best blood you’ve ever tasted?”
“Do I have to say it, Zack? The more attracted I am to someone, the better his blood tastes to me. Think about it and take a guess.”
My mouth dropped open. “Really?”
He can tell from one drop?
“Tell me you couldn’t feel it just a little, even through that tiny prick.”
I realized that I had felt it. Way more than a little. I’d assumed it was just me reacting to the attraction I’d always had toward Noah. But that wild thrill when his tongue slicked the drop of blood from my finger had been like nothing I’d ever felt before. I shivered a little, remembering.
“Yeah, I felt it.”
“And you probably wouldn’t mind feeling it again?”
I laughed. Mind? If it felt like that every time, I’d drag his mouth to my neck and impale myself on his teeth. “Okay, I get it. Willing snacks.”
“Very willing.” The grin he gave me when he said that was sly and gorgeous and I couldn’t help it. I pounced. He growled a little like he had the night before, but instead of finding it scary, I thought it was the best thing I’d ever heard. It made me want to rip his T-shirt in half. I kissed him hard, pulling on him and getting as close as I could. His hands roamed under my shirt, making my already overheated skin feel like it was about to combust. I wanted more of him.
“Will you feed from me?” I asked, my breath coming in short pants. “I want to know what it feels like.”
He moaned and kissed my neck. It was the best sort of torture. “I want to.” He breathed in deeply and moaned again.
“But?” I ground my hips into his and pulled his hair.
“It would be so intense. I’m not sure if I could control myself.”
“What do you mean?”
“It’s been a few weeks since I’ve fed and you taste so… good.” He shuddered. “I’m afraid I’d lose control.”
“You think you might accidentally kill me?”
“I don’t know. I’ve never tasted anything that amazing before. If I bit you when I was hungry, it would be so hard to stop. I’d like to say I could, but I’d never want to take that chance.” He shook his head slowly, then looked at me with an intense stare. “I’ve never felt like this about anyone else, either. I don’t know how that affects things.”
“You haven’t?”
He lifted my chin so I had to look at him. “Of course not. Zack, you know I love you, right? I guess I never actually said it out loud, but I’ve felt it for a really long time.”
“I love you too. I always have.” I’d thought the words so many times, but they almost felt strange coming out of my mouth.
Noah squeezed me tightly against him and shuddered. “I want everything with you. I want to hold you and kiss you, fall asleep with you in my arms, and tell you every day that I love you. But I also want to kiss you and taste your blood. I… I want you. More than I can say. I’ve been dreaming of it for years. I just can’t take any chances with you the first time.”
I trembled at the mental picture Noah was painting. I wanted him too. As soon as I could have him. “So what do we do?”
“I need to, uh, eat before I can be with you. Before I can trust myself to not lose control and to keep you safe.”
“Okay, so we’re going out to get you dinner. When do we leave?”
“You want to come?”
Is he kidding? He was going to some vampire bar that I pictured being all dark and red and sexy, like in a movie or something. Who would miss an opportunity to see something like that in real life? Besides, there was no way I was letting Noah out of my sight.
“Uh, yeah, I’m coming.” I couldn’t wait.
Chapter Six: This Time We Mean It
A FEW hours later, after the sun had finally set, I’d packed a backpack of clothes and was getting ready to sneak out with Noah in tow. Sure, I was eighteen, but somehow I’d never quite gotten over the fear of my mother getting mad at me. I didn’t have a good story to tell her about what had happened, and the tru
th sure as hell wouldn’t work.
Oh yeah, Mom, I’m going with Noah to this vampire hideout to watch him feed, then we’re going back to his house where we’re going to spend the night in bed kissing and, well, pretty much everything else… oh, and by the way, I’m gay.
The picture I got in my mind of that scene was horrifying but funny. Even without the vampire part, I couldn’t imagine their faces.
I listened at my door for sounds of movement in the living area. When I heard complete silence, I figured my family was out for their evening walk. Perfect. I picked up the nonchalant little note I had written earlier about spending the night at Noah’s house for a bonfire or some other lame excuse and laced my free hand through his. I brushed our lips together one more time and, with a wicked smile of anticipation, cracked open the door, ready to slip out.
I thought we were home free for about five whole seconds, but when I went to drop the note on the coffee table, I saw my very quiet parents sitting on the couch, waiting expectantly. There was no way they could have missed the fact that Noah and I were holding hands.
“Sit,” my father ordered.
“Explain,” my mother added. “Maya, honey. Please go to your room and read for a little while. We need to talk to Zack.”
Maya looked annoyed. She could tell this was going to be good. I could already see the texts that were going to be flying back and forth between her and her friends the second she got within range of a decent cell tower.
Noah and I dropped each other’s hands and sank slowly onto the second couch. I felt like wild game being cornered in the forest.
“All right, you two. What’s going on?” My mother looked concerned but not hostile.
I thought I should just get it out of the way. It was too late to lie, and I didn’t really want to anyway. I reached over and pulled Noah’s hand into my lap, twining his fingers with mine once again. “Mom, Dad, Noah and I are together.”
“But I don’t understand. The last thing I knew is you two had some falling out last summer and hadn’t spoken since. You just saw each other for the first time a few days ago. When did this happen?” I noticed she didn’t say anything about me being gay. Maybe Mom was more perceptive than I gave her credit for.
Noah looked over at me and smiled, squeezing my hand. “Let me explain. First of all, this isn’t new. I’ve been in love with Zack for years. He was my best friend and my first crush and, well, I just never got over him. I never wanted to. Last summer I finally found out that he felt the same way about me. I was happier than I’ve ever been before, but I was also weak. When I went home to tell my parents the news, they told me that their son couldn’t be gay and they didn’t want me talking to Zack anymore. They threatened to take my college money away, to send me to live with my grandfather in England. I’d never been away from my family. I didn’t know what to do, so I did the worst thing possible. I pushed Zack away, just like they’d asked. I hurt him to keep my family happy; I’ve been half dead without him ever since.” Noah took a deep breath, looking as if he was close to tears.
Damn, he’s good.
“Anyway, when Zack found me at the dock that first night, I told him how sorry I was. I can’t even begin to explain how grateful I am that he decided to let me back into his life.”
My mother didn’t look quite convinced. “Why is it different now? Don’t you still live at your parents’ house? I don’t want my son getting hurt again. You have no idea how long it took him to get over losing you the first time.”
Noah shifted uncomfortably in his seat. This wasn’t his favorite topic, and my mother was acting like a defensive mama bear at the moment. I didn’t envy him.
“Zack’s never going to lose me again. Not unless he wants me to go.” Mom opened her mouth to speak, but Noah held up his hand. “My parents are no longer with us, Mrs. Parker. They were in a car crash last September when they were on a business trip. I live at the house with Mrs. Clooney. I told Zack that I would have found him as soon as it happened, but I thought he hated me after what I’d done.”
That was enough to make my mother forget about the interrogation. After all, she’d loved Noah too. Her eyes got all wide and teary. I could see a huge gushy mom lovefest coming on.
“Oh, honey, come here!” She stood and pulled him into a big hug. The hug lasted for a minute or two before she held Noah back with her arms. “I’m glad you two found each other again. I didn’t think Zack was ever going to meet anyone else that he could love as much as he loves you.”
“Mom?” I looked at her with my mouth open.
She rolled her eyes. “Zack, I’m not blind. You may not have actually said anything, but you two have been broadcasting your feelings about each other loud and clear for years if anyone took the time to pay attention. I thought it was adorable.” I was mortified but blindingly happy at the same time. “Now, unless I’m mistaken you two didn’t get any dinner, and, Noah sweetie, you’ve gotten so pale. You need something to eat.”
Uh oh.
“Actually, Mrs. Parker, I’d love to stay but there’s a movie in town Zack and I were hoping to see, and you know how long the drive is. We were planning on grabbing something on the way.”
“And I was going to stay over at Noah’s so I don’t wake anyone up when I get in. It’ll be really late.” My mother gave me her best “I wasn’t born yesterday” look. I sighed and rolled my eyes at her. “Mom, I’m out of high school. I think I’m old enough to stay over with my boyfriend.”
Just saying the word out loud made happy little thrills race up my back. She raised her eyebrows at me but nodded reluctantly and told us to have fun. My father was still sitting in the same position he’d been in for the entire conversation. He looked a little shell-shocked. Apparently his intuition wasn’t quite as good as Mom’s.
Noah and I finally escaped after another round of hugs and kisses and promises to call in the morning so she’d know we made it home safe. We dashed, laughing and holding hands, along the path that surrounded the lake. Our plan was to get changed as quickly as possible and head out by nine. The place we were headed was a few counties over and we didn’t want to waste the entire night driving.
When we got to his house, I ducked into one of the guest bathrooms to get ready. I luckily had decided to pack a few nicer things at the last minute. Noah had said the bar was a mixed crowd. I didn’t know exactly what he meant by that so I brought the nicest things I had with me.
I had a pair of dark jeans that were, in my opinion, the best pants I owned. Not too baggy, cut really well. I paired them with a black button-up which I wore untucked and unbuttoned a little at the top so the silver Celtic pendant I always wore tied around my neck with a thin black cord would show. I rolled the sleeves up to my forearms, made sure my hair was swept perfectly off to the side, and even put on a little bit of the black eyeliner I’d swiped from Maya. I figured if there was ever a night to try something like that, this was it. I stepped back, looking in the mirror. It was kind of startling. I didn’t look like myself at all. I actually looked like a guy who belonged in a vampire club with someone as beautiful as Noah.
I smiled quietly to myself, hoping he would agree, and shoved my other clothes back into the backpack.
Noah’s reaction made my efforts more than worth it. I didn’t even get a chance to see how amazing he looked before he dragged me up against him and kissed me senseless for several long minutes.
“I’m not letting you out of my sight tonight,” he growled against my neck after he released my mouth. “You look so damn hot.”
“Yeah?” I grinned. I couldn’t help but milk the moment. I felt hot for once and was loving every second of it.
He reached up and brushed his finger on my lips. “Yeah. It’s scary how much I don’t want to leave right now. We need to get outta here before I cave.”
I rubbed myself up against him. “What if I want you to cave?” I kissed his neck and gave it a little bite.
He gulped and pulled back. “
Let’s go.”
I laughed a low chuckle, already feeling high, then followed him down the stairs and outside to his car.
THE CLUB was everything I expected. Maybe even a little wilder. I don’t know if it was life imitating art or if some Hollywood people out there know a little more than we think, but the place fit the bill perfectly. It was thrilling and intimidating. Noah must have sensed my uneasiness because he put his arm around my shoulders the moment we walked in. There were more than a few interested stares shot our way, both male and female. I felt a stab of jealousy, but I got why they were looking at Noah. There wasn’t anyone in the whole place who looked like him.
I was awestruck by the whole spectacle surrounding us—the swirling red-and-purple lights, the low sensual plushness of the couches and chairs, the skimpily clad crowd swaying to an uninhibited beat.
When I looked over at the bar, I saw a male vampire biting a woman; I felt like I was watching an X-rated movie. The way the woman moaned and arched her back, it was obvious what she was feeling. It was unnerving to see that kind of intimate act on public display. I pushed up against Noah and was glad when he tightened his arm around my shoulders.
I had never liked feeling claimed with the guys I’d dated in the past year, but with Noah I loved it. It wasn’t just because we were somewhere new and a little scary. It was because I wanted everyone to know I was his. We could have been anywhere and I would have still felt that same satisfied warmth in the pit of my stomach when he pulled me close. I smiled up at him and hooked my fingers into the back pocket of his jeans.
Suddenly, I felt his back stiffen. “Watch out for this woman,” he whispered to me. “She isn’t one of the nice ones.”
The woman who was approaching us was undeniably beautiful, but totally repulsive at the same time. There was something reptilian in her movements. She was tall with pale skin, almond-shaped eyes, and dark hair that reached her waist. She wore a short red dress with a Mandarin collar and black stiletto boots that seemed to crawl up her thighs.