Mending Hearts: Logan's Story

by Kimberly Krey

  Candice paused, setting her eyes on him. “Thanks,” she finally said, hurrying to the sink. Steam rose in a thick cloud as she emptied the pot. Logan started to second-guess the whole shirtless move. Hell, she’d made this nice dinner for him and he was going to be sitting at the table like some kind of barbarian? Not a chance.

  “I’ll be right back,” he said, rushing back toward the hallway. The white undershirt he’d tossed on the bed laid waiting for him. He tugged the thing over his head, awkwardly forcing his arms through the short sleeves as he walked.

  Candice appraised him as he neared, pausing as she looked over his now-covered chest. “You ready?”

  He nodded. “Yes.”

  It remained quiet as they dished up, but once their plates were full, Candice piped up. “I talked to Lana the other day.”

  Logan’s shoulders stiffened. His fork – halfway to his mouth – froze in place. There were few things Logan had a real distaste for in life; Lana Peters was one of them. Bringing her name up at dinner was like setting a jar of earwigs at the center of the table. “Oh yeah?” He hoped Candice couldn’t sense the tension in his voice.

  “Yeah. Kenny is almost seven. Can you believe it?”

  Kenny. The woman’s one redeeming quality. “You’re kidding. Bet he’s getting tall.”

  Candice lowered her chin, twisted a fork in her pasta. “Yeah.”

  Oh, no. He knew that look. There was something she wanted to say. Something she knew he wouldn’t want to hear.

  “So is he in kindergarten now?”

  Another nod. “The school year’s almost up so he’ll be in first grade this fall. Can you believe it?” Candice ran a hand over the back of her neck. “She wants to come out for a visit.”

  And there it was. It was as if she’d twisted the lid off the jar of earwigs and unleashed them onto the table. Logan could nearly feel them crawling up his arms. “Why?”

  Candice sneered. “That’s a weird question. Why do you think?” She set her fork down. Lifted her shoulders. And squared her gaze on him. “Because we’re friends. Is that a good enough reason for you?”

  Logan held her gaze, gaging the expression on her face.

  “And because we haven’t seen each other in over a year. We barely even talk anymore,” she said. “I really miss her.”

  She misses her? What about him, Logan wanted to ask. She’d missed her friend over the last year but had she missed her husband? The person she was actually married to? The one she’d only just reconnected with? Besides, how could she miss such a sneaky, touchy-flirty woman who always found excuses to spend time with Logan when she was around? Not that mentioning that had done him any good in the past. In fact, his aversion to Lana had been a sore spot for years now.

  He forced in a bite of spaghetti, barely even tasting it. He didn’t need another sore spot in his marriage right now. What they needed was harmony. Something he’d have to compromise to achieve.

  He took a swig of water, felt the sliver of a melted ice cube slide down his throat. “When does she want to come?”

  Candice’s expression lightened. A shift that made him realize how affected she was by the topic. This was important to her.

  “Either this weekend or next.”

  “The weekend?” he nearly shouted. “That’s ridiculous. We’ve been separated all this time. We barely move under the same roof again, and now we’re supposed to welcome new people into our home? During our only days off?”

  “I admit the timing’s not good –”

  “Not good? It’s the worst. I can’t imagine a worse time for Lana Peters to come spend a weekend with us. Why couldn’t she have come to visit while we were separated?”

  The answer struck him before Candice could even speak. She wasn’t interested in Candice. Lana had her eyes set on him and he knew it.

  “You’re not even listening to me,” Candice snapped, breaking him from his thoughts. A deep shade of pink settled over her cheeks. She wiped the back of her hand over her forehead. “I told you that I don’t think the timing is good either, but despite what you think Lana has been a very good friend to me over the years. She has spent hours talking with me, helping me deal with everything we went through, so when she says she wants to come visit I’m not going to tell her no. If you want us to go stay with my mom or Shelly while she’s here I’ll do it. But there’s no way I’m going to turn her away.”

  “Yeah. She probably wouldn’t even come if you told her I wasn’t going to be around.”

  Candice’s mouth fell open. “Oh, my gosh. I can’t believe you are really bringing that up again. Can you please stop thinking that every woman out there is after you?”

  A hot flare broke out in his chest. “I don’t think every woman out there is after me, but I do think Lana is.” The angry warmth spread further as Candice threw her head back in laughter.

  “She has Brad, Logan. And they’re doing fine.” She seemed to hesitate then, and Logan wondered if Candice had any idea how Lana and Brad’s relationship was. Of all the heartache he and Candice had endured over the years, Brad and Lana always seemed to one-up them on the distressed-relationship scale. By no fault of Brad’s, from what Logan could tell. But what did he know?

  “Is this why you made dinner for me? Because you were trying to warm me up to the idea?”

  “No. I made you dinner because…” she shrugged, irritation building in her eyes, “because I always make dinner. If we’re living together then we should eat dinner together, don’t you think?”

  The heat within him mellowed all at once, her words like dirt over the flames. He inhaled a deep breath, let it out slowly, and felt his shoulders fall back into place. “Yes,” he agreed, “we should.” He looked down at his plate of neglected food. Bright in color, rich in aroma, and made by the hands of the woman he loved. Willing hands. She planned to eat with him each night? He liked that. “I’m sorry,” he said, lifting his chin once more.

  Their eyes met in time for him to catch the hurt dwelling in hers.

  “I shouldn’t have said that,” he continued. “I guess I’m just nervous about all of this.” He reached an arm across the table, set his hand where Candice could reach it.

  But she only looked at the offer, reluctance etched on her face.

  The fire flickered back into action. Not as big and bold as it once was, but it was there all the same. Gradually burning holes through his confidence, one layer after the next. He had really messed up, hadn’t he? Had being married to the woman not taught him anything?

  He forced his next few breaths to come out slowly. Evenly. “If Lana wants to come for a visit, I won’t say anything more about it. If she brings Kenny, I’ll take him out. Let him go for a ride. It’ll give me a reason to bring the horses out here sooner.”

  He pulled his hand away. Yet just as he did Candice’s arm moved from its folded spot across her chest to the table by her plate. Had she meant to reach out to him?

  He looked up, but couldn’t begin to guess where her mind was.

  “Kenny would really like that,” she said, voice down to a whisper. As if speaking it any louder might be mistaken as forgiveness.

  Logan nodded, looked down at his food once more, and beckoned the great heavens above. Perhaps a quick and thorough divorce might have been easier. Would have spared him all this guessing and grief. But it would have cut out the one thing he wanted most in his future: Candice. Without her it didn’t seem like much of a future at all.

  CHAPTER NINETEEN

  The sun was nowhere in sight during the drive home from the bakery. It couldn’t have gone down altogether; Candice was certain. It was just hidden behind the large mass of clouds covering the western sky. She wondered if Logan was home yet. She hadn’t expected him to be there when she’d arrived earlier, but with the storm approaching and all, he may have slipped in during her short trip into town. She inhaled the scent of fresh bread and smiled. It would go perfect with the lasagna she’d made with the sauce from last ni
ght.

  Last night.

  The words dragged through her mind like a sharp tool, plowing through all relevant matter, planting deep seeds of dread along the way. “Tonight will be different,” she declared, trying to shake it off. It had to be.

  Just as she stepped into the house, smells of lasagna permeating the air, thick drops of rain began pelting the rooftop. The loud, frantic sound unsettled her. Logan hadn’t taken his truck today, which meant he planned to bring the horses home. Come to think of it, she wasn’t sure how he got out to Earl’s in the first place. Had his father come to pick him up at the crack of dawn, or had Logan wandered through the acres of land to get there?

  Candice flicked the sandals off her feet and strode to the window, her eyes set on the sight beyond. But all she could see was chaos. Rain coming down so fast and so hard she couldn’t see separate drops. Just an endless stream of water pouring over the land. A crack of lightning tore through the sky, it’s path jagged and sharp. A mean clap of thunder followed, causing the windows to rumble.

  “Logan?” she hollered, wondering if perhaps he was already there. She wasn’t surprised when no answer came. She hadn’t seen his hat on the hook. Or his boots by the doorway. Another bolt of lightning shot through the clouds, the thunder booming as more streaks lit up the sky.

  Her heart picked up its pace, seeming to match the rhythm of the rain, if it had any rhythm at all. The chaotic beat making her breathe at a rapid rate. What if he was stuck out there in all of this? What if he’d been struck by lightening on his way back? Was he lying helpless someplace out on the land, in need of medical attention?

  She dropped the keys on the counter, slid the bagged bread next to them, and tore the strap of her purse from her shoulder. She dug in frantically, the beats of her frightened heart urging her forward until she found her phone. After dialing with clumsy fingers, Candice brought the receiver to her ear and waited.

  One ring.

  Two.

  What if he had some freak heart attack out on the field? What if he’s dead, like Dad?

  He’s not, she told herself, biting down hard as it rang a third time.

  Four rings. It would go to his voicemail any moment.

  “This is Logan,” came the receiver, “can’t take your call now. If you’d be so kind as to leave a message at the beep I’ll get right back with you.” The beep came next, the sound muffled by another rumble of thunder.

  “Call me when you get this, okay? I just want to make sure you’re alright.” She paused there. “Hope you’re on your way home now,” she added before hanging up. The meal all but forgotten, Candice sunk into the nearest chair, keeping her eyes pasted on the moving sheet out the window. With the phone still in her hand, she tried the ranch next. Hoping to catch either Lilly or Earl.

  It took only two rings for Earl to pick up. “Howdy there, sweetheart. What can I do for you?”

  Candice smiled, despite the upset within her. She liked that he still had her on his caller ID. “Hi Earl. I’m just wondering if Logan is still out there with you.”

  “Afraid not, hon. He took a couple of horses with him about an hour ago. Let’s see… it was Annabelle and Crow. He was hoping to get them to your place before the storm hit.”

  “An hour?” The beats in her chest were aching now. Boom! Boom! Ba-boom!

  “Yeah, but you know Logan. He may have stopped a few times along the way to check on a calf or two. He should be there in no time.”

  She nodded. “He didn’t answer his cell.”

  “Yeah,” Earl replied. “Probably wouldn’t hear it with the storm and all. Who knows? If he’s caught out in the rain with it, the thing might be drenched beyond repair at this point.” He chuckled, and Candice only wished she could do the same. She hated the anxiety that seemed to grip hold of her at times like these.

  “Don’t worry, Doll,” Earl said, his voice gentle and kind. “He’ll be home soon enough.”

  Candice nodded. “You’re right. Thanks, Earl. I’ll talk to you later.”

  Once the line was dead, the noise from the rain grew once more. Candice walked back to the window, rested her hands along the sill, and exhaled a deep breath. “Stop worrying,” she whispered. “He’s fine.”

  “Who’s fine?” The deep, raspy voice, coming from behind, made Candice jump.

  She spun around with a hand to her chest. “Logan?”

  And there he stood, a spot of color among the cool shaded tones of blue and gray, a towel wrapped snugly around his waist.

  “Why didn’t you turn on a light or two?” he asked. “You can hardly see a thing in here.”

  “Oh. I was calling to see if you’d left yet.” Her pulse was calming already. “I didn’t know you were here.”

  Logan shook a hand through his wet hair. “Was just in the shower. Too bad you didn’t check in the bathroom,” he said with a wink. “You could have joined me.”

  Her pulse sped into action again. Her cheeks grew warm as she looked over his magnificent chest. Contours catching shadows in the low light. She felt vulnerable then. The building worry she had over his whereabouts, crashing into the sheer desire that flooded her while she looked at him.

  A month. She’d have to wait an entire month to even kiss him. Candice hadn’t meant to think of the rule she’d set, yet in that moment, she couldn’t pull her mind from the horrible truth of it. What a stupid rule.

  Logan strode over to the wall and flicked a few switches, casting a burst of light over him and all his muscled glory. “Sure smells good in here,” he said, walking around the counter next. He grabbed the keys she’d set there, walked them over to the hook by the door, and hung them up.

  “Where are your boots?” she asked, barely managing to find her voice. “And your hat?”

  “Hung them up in the mudroom. I came in from the back yard.” He adjusted the towel at his waist, distracting every thought Candice had.

  “I got the horses here now,” he continued. “We’ll let Kenny ride Annabelle. She’ll be good to him. Thought you might like to ride her too. Maybe go for a ride one night.”

  She gulped. “That sounds nice.” Where had her head gone? She couldn’t remember what she’d been doing only seconds ago. All she could think about was how glad she was that Logan was there. Of how much she missed him, even if she hadn’t realized it.

  “Oh, and Candice?” He was glancing over one shoulder now, about to enter the hallway.

  “I borrowed a few DVDs from Allie. Thought we could watch a movie after supper.” And then he was gone. A radiant image shot to her mind – the two of them snuggled up on the sofa. Those big, strong arms wrapping around her.

  A deep sort of longing kindled in her chest. Again she thought of their agreement to refrain from intimacy, and frowned. If Lana hadn’t made her swear to keeping that, she might just dismiss the entire thing that very night. As it was, Lana would be coming to stay with them. She couldn’t have her friend think she was a weak woman who just fell into his arms on the first week.

  Candice straightened her shoulders as she made her way to the kitchen. She wasn’t weak. If things were right for her and Logan now, they’d be right in a month from now too. No need to rush things. Not after all the heartache she’d endured to pull away from him.

  But as she cut into the fresh loaf of bread, a very poignant thought cycled through her mind: It had only been a few days, and already she was doubting the single rule she had set. Candice shook her head, recalling the kind things he’d done for her. Bringing horses onto the property, specifically one that would be good for Kenny to ride. The gesture showed he would no longer fight her about Lana’s visit. That he’d make it easier on her, in fact. She thought of that sly wink, knowing smile, and the way Logan had looked in that towel. Logan Emerson was a hard man to resist; already, Candice had forgotten why she even wanted to try.

  ~+~

  Logan stretched an arm over his head as the movie began, wondering if he dared rest it along the sofa behind Candice
. He decided against it, dropping his hand on the small space between them instead. Talk about a trip to the past – he felt just like he was back in high school. Trying to make a move on his hot date. Funny thing was, he’d been married to his hot date for almost a decade.

  He puffed out a pent up breath and forced his eyes on the screen. He’d let Candice select the movie, and she hadn’t done half bad. From the looks of the cover it was part thriller part romance. Sounded like a win-win to him. So why was it he couldn’t focus on a single word?

  The answer was simple: Candice. Her and that warm, lively current surging between them. A near life form all its own. He gulped, casually shifted an inch closer, and held his breath. Would she scoot further away from him, or allow him to slowly close the gap?

  The movie played on, Logan working to get into the thing, when Candice finally made a move of her own. He glanced at her through the corner of his eye, watched as she pulled her legs onto the couch and tucked them beneath her. The action brought her closer. In fact, had she not set her hand down between them to support her weight, she might be leaning against his shoulder. He caught hints of her shampoo in his next breath. That sweet coconut scent that was all her.

  His pulse picked up to a rapid beat. He glanced down at where her hand rested, noticed the ring on her finger, and used it to buoy himself back into place. She was his wife, after all. She might have set the no-intimacy rule, and he may have agreed to honor it, but he wasn’t about to get friend-zoned over that time. No, Candice needed to know that he was attracted to her. She needed to remember the chemistry they had. The chemistry he felt sizzling over his skin at the mere proximity.

  But did she feel it too?

  He stared blankly at the screen. His chest aching with each shallow breath. He needed to make a move. Scoot closer. Put his arm behind her back. Candice shifted in her seat once more. And just as Logan thought he’d lost his chance – that she was aiming to move away from him, she closed the gap instead. Rested her shoulder against his. The bend of her elbow followed the curve of his, her hand resting just along his wrist.