Gorgeous: A Commander in Briefs Novel

by Kristy Marie

  You low-balled it. I gave it five.

  I smile. You see the best in everybody. Fuck. I mean you see the best in everything. The movie had opportunities for improvement.

  I’m fucking sweating. Did I really type that shit? Where were you on that one, autocorrect?

  Every movie is a five for someone, even if it has areas for improvement. Some reviewers will still view it as perfection.

  I swallow, rereading her text repeatedly. Does she mean me or are we still talking about Kickass?

  Some movies aren’t worth your time, I text.

  That’s not your decision to make.

  And now I know we aren’t talking about the movie. I’ll save you the time and spoil it for you. My script doesn’t end with a happily ever after.

  She takes a minute to respond. I’ve always been more of a fan of the alternate endings.

  Why must she be so goddamn stubborn? Why can’t she be quiet and complacent and find her a nice guy with some mental stability? Why must she keep feeding my addiction?

  Why are you still up? I ask her.

  Why are YOU still up?

  And this is why my dick is hard. Arguing with her is like foreplay. It’s in my nature to respond to commands and not being able to shut that sass up has me rock fucking hard.

  I can’t sleep. I text her.

  Take something.

  I scoff. No.

  She sends me an annoyed emoji that makes me laugh. I admit, I’m used to hearing you type at night. It’s too quiet without you here.

  It’s not a lie. I can hear Ans moaning in the next room and Hayes’ headboard is chipping away at the sheetrock across the hall. It’s like a pay-by-the-hour motel in here at the moment.

  If you want, you can call me. I won’t talk and you can listen to my keystrokes. She responds.

  I’m shocked at her offer. I really want to listen to her but I feel like if I take her up on this, I’m crossing a line. A big red line. I stare at the ceiling, hearing Anniston’s cries and Hayes’ grunts, and I realize for the first time how alone I feel. When she was here, I didn’t.

  I press on her contact and listen to it ring. She picks up on the third one and doesn’t say a word. And then she starts to type, and my eyes drift closed. The only sound is her breathing and the tapping on her laptop.

  And it sounds like home.

  “I don’t understand what you’re saying, Jameson. It sounds like you’re saying a hot-ass chick—who can actually tolerate your broody ass—let you kiss her, and you…” His eyebrows shoot up his forehead, encouraging me to repeat what I told him. “I just need to hear you say it again so I’m clear what happened,” he clarifies, totally lying. All he’s doing with that shitty grin plastered on his face is aggravating me, but I give in and play his game because I need advice from another guy, and unfortunately today it’s Theo.

  “I pushed her away afterwards,” I say again for his sick sense of humor.

  Theo’s grin morphs into a look of horror. “How dare she! That bitch! Doesn’t she know she’s supposed to kiss your dick first?” His tongue goes to his cheek as his hand makes a back-and-forth motion at his mouth. “You’re right, Jameson. I would have pushed her away, too. A kiss on the mouth is a cardinal sin. You’re better off with a girl who knows what she’s doing.”

  Deep breaths, Cade. You knew talking to him would be rough. Exhaling, I mutter, “How did you ever find a woman?”

  Theo smirks and tosses me the football. “Jameson, your commander gets off on my mouth. Generally, it’s between her lips. Which lips, depends on how filthy I get.”

  I am not surprised in the least.

  I rocket the football back to him, completely choosing to ignore his comments about Anniston. I don’t want to know all the crude, sexual things they do when I’m not having to witness it firsthand.

  “Look, Jameson, I don’t know why we’re out here in the heat talking about feelings. I don’t know if all this celibacy shit has increased your estrogen or what.” He tosses the ball back—in terrible form, I might add—and I snag it before it veers too far right and out of my reach. “But listen to me very closely. Fuck. This. Girl. Just fuck her. What is the worst that can happen? She realizes you’re a big vagina and never calls you again?” He grins, teasing me, and I throw the ball as hard as I can, hitting his left shoulder. He laughs, unfazed. “That would solve your problem, right? Her leaving you alone? Isn’t that what you want?”

  Maybe.

  I’m not sure now. I know I kept giving Breck a hard time about going home, but the last week was pretty good. I’d gotten to know her better and I actually grew to like her a little bit. Granted, her fuzzy socks and constant dancing and overall optimistic outlook on life got on my nerves, but overall, she’s beau—nice. She’s nice. And too good for a man like me.

  “Geez, Jameson. Lighten the fuck up. It’s just sex. You don’t have to promise her a white picket fence and three kids. Just a good time—or bad. It’s been a while since you’ve given it a go, but either way, you can knock the rust off Jameson Jr. and stop depriving him of some action just because you’re being emotional and all of a sudden in touch with your feelings.”

  “Talking to you is pointless,” I observe, slipping an earbud in one ear, intent on zoning out and going for a run to clear my head. I need to think. All this shit with Breck is stressing me out. Do I want to fuck her? Yes. Does she deserve to be fucked by a mess like me who can’t commit and can’t love because he doesn’t even love himself? No, she doesn’t. Do I want to be selfish and do it anyway? One hundred percent.

  “Ugh, now I feel guilty like I should run with you or something,” he says, tossing the football out into the yard.

  I shake my head, already trotting down the hill. “Please don’t. I’m good.”

  Theo chuckles, ignoring my request for solitude, and sprints past me. “Come on, Jameson, let that testosterone loose and race me. Winner buys drinks tonight.”

  Damn it.

  I take off behind him, pushing hard to catch up. I never turn down a competition with Theo. It’s what we’ve always done; push each other to our limits. He’s pushing me out of my head, and whether I want to admit it or not, it’s working. We race past the barn, not laughing, not hearing the music pounding in our ears with each step. We go balls-to-the-fucking-wall with each stride until the only thing I can think about is winning.

  What was supposed to be a simple race turned into an Olympic trial through the pastures. I don’t know how Theo has so much endurance. He has less mass to haul around than I do, making him significantly faster than me. I kept pace until the last quarter mile when he sprinted faster than a gazelle to the house, making it look as if he was playing with me the whole time. Now I’m in a worse mood than before.

  Hands on my hips, my lungs are on fire when we make it to the backyard. The sight before me is comforting, a smile tugging at my lips before Theo ruins it with a shitty remark.

  “Thank God you needed a girl chat and we didn’t have to suffer her wrath.”

  We both stand, me catching my breath and Theo eyeing Anniston’s tits as she lays horizontally over Hayes and Mason as they do pushups. She’s casually filing her nails and barking out reps while the guys groan, their arms shaking from the weight of the up and down motion.

  I send Theo an eat-shit look. “I did not need a girl chat. I simply asked for your advice, which was terrible by the way.”

  Theo shrugs and starts toward Anniston but not before throwing back, “Terrible or not, you know it’s the truth.”

  Ugh. Fucking Breck is a bad idea.

  Entertaining anything with Breck is a bad idea.

  Falling asleep with her on the phone was an even worse idea.

  “Speak of the siren herself.” Theo chuckles, kneeling on the ground by Anniston’s head. “Showtime, playboy,” he says before biting Anniston’s nipple through her shirt and making her squeal.

  For a second, I consider throwing a deck chair at his face. But the crunching
of a van flying down the driveway stops me.

  She came.

  Like she said she would. And now I owe her an explanation for my behavior.

  I rake in a few ragged breaths and wipe the sweat from my forehead as Theo shouts, “We’re back here.”

  He laughs when I flip him off, knowing good and damn well he could have given me an extra minute. Breck appears around the corner in cut-offs and a Flash t-shirt, her high-top Converse shoes tying together her sloppy, yet incredibly cute outfit. She’s like my very own comic book nerd. Sexy and cute, just begging for me to prove how much bigger my hammer is than Thor’s.

  “Hey, Breck. What’s up?” Anniston greets her first since her head is hanging off Hayes’ back.

  “Hi. I’m sorry to interrupt. Cade—”

  Hayes interrupts her as he pulls his head up and flashes her his trademark wink. I feel a growl bubble up but I hold it in so as not to embarrass myself more than I already have. Hayes wants his ass beat. Fucking with Breck in front of me is a death sentence at this point. I’ve all but pissed on her leg to claim her. Hayes annoying me after two days of hell is bordering on a murder charge.

  “You’re looking scrumptious this morning, darlin. You got a hot date or something?”

  Pink spreads across Breck’s cheeks, making her look sun-kissed. “Uh, no. It’s laundry day,” she blurts out, looking at me from under her long eyelashes.

  I flash her an apologetic smile, refraining from making contact with Hayes, and nod to the back door. We need to talk and not out here with an audience.

  Breck holds up a finger, asking me to hold on. “Anniston, can I speak with you for a minute?”

  I feel sucker-punched when Anniston pulls up and looks between me and Breck, and says, “Sure.”

  B,

  The mood is somber in the tent tonight. Kyle’s wife sent him a letter that she was leaving him—something like she couldn’t take being alone all the time. It has me thinking. Guys like us have a hard time maintaining relationships. The military seems to be our girl. Maybe I shouldn’t pursue Jess. She deserves someone who can be there for her all the time. How’s class going? Any new man in your life that I need to order a hit on? Miss you, weirdo.

  #milosacedthesupermanreview #yoursandjesswasmediocretohis #boysrulegirlsdrool

  Ben

  “Come over here and tell me what’s going on.” Anniston motions with her nail file for me to come closer. I do. And when I’m standing awkwardly at the guys’ heels as they push up and down she says, “Have a seat. You can take their ass.”

  The guys choke out a laugh at the possibility of a double meaning. If they could see the look of disbelief on my face, they would tease me for days about it. It seems to be their thing with me. Teasing. Anniston pats Hayes’ butt, encouraging me to sit.

  “Stop, boys. Let her sit.” They both groan but do as she requests. She gets up and motions for me to take her spot. Slowly, I lower myself down and lay across their behinds. I hate to admit it but knowing these two strong men raise and lower their bodies with my weight makes my girl parts tingle.

  “Twenty more,” Anniston barks out with a chuckle while Hayes and Mason grunt and lower to the ground. I struggle to figure out what to do with my hands. The motion feels strange, but I try to relax and focus on how the muscles in their glutes and lower back flex between the reps.

  “Are they in trouble?” I ask Anniston who is smirking down at Hayes for some reason. I don’t know if this is part of their daily training or some kind of punishment.

  “Oh no. They aren’t in trouble. Well, Hayes probably has done something shitty, but no, this is just part of their daily workout regimen. Since I’ve been gone so much, I wanted to work out with them.” She chuckles when Hayes makes a disbelieving sound.

  “Don’t let her lie to you, B. She went on that honeymoon and binge ate so much she thinks the extra ten pounds she put on is equivalent to us moving up a weight class.”

  I suck in a breath. Did he say Anniston gained weight?

  Anniston throws her head back and laughs. “You’re a liar, Connor Hayes! Give me ten more just for being a pain in my ass today.”

  Both guys bark out a “ooh-rah,” but it’s laced with humor. It’s obvious they are happy to have their commander back.

  “So, tell me what brings you by, Breck?”

  Right. Why am I here again? Because I am a stupid and naive girl, and I feel terrible thinking I’ve set Cade back by kissing him.

  “I …” Get your shit together, B. Just tell her. She knows Cade. Maybe she can share some insight on how to get through to him. “I came to apologize to Cade.”

  Her head lifts to look me in the eye. This is one of those moments where instinct demands you not look away from the predator or it may attack you. That’s how her stare feels right now. She likes me, but she will kill me if I’ve hurt Cade in any way. If I’ve learned anything from living here and being around this family for two weeks, it’s that they take care of one another, no matter what.

  “Oh?” Eyebrows arched and a hard look on her face, she encourages me to continue.

  This was a bad idea. I should have just called him. What the hell was I thinking? Oh, that’s right. I was thinking I would toss on some clothes, breeze in here, and say, “Cade, I’m sorry for kissing your kissable face. I’m sorry you’re so damn hot that I want to have your babies. And I’m sorry that I’m a liar, and now we have this complicated and fucked up relationship.” Yeah, not so smart.

  I swallow and lift my head. “Can we, uh, speak in private?”

  Anniston nods curtly, her face one in deep thought. “We’re done for the day, boys. Go shower and hydrate.”

  Both guys collapse on the ground with me still on their back. They groan and I spring up. “I’m sorry!” I say. “I didn’t mean to stay on you.”

  Anniston laughs, dusting imaginary lint off her spandex shorts, and waves away my comment. “They can take it. They bench twice your weight on a daily basis. They’re groaning because it probably makes them horny. Well, Hayes anyway.”

  Hayes stands, sweat dripping down his jaw, and winks at me, adjusting himself right in front of me and walking away as if nothing happened.

  My mouth gapes open, caught between a laugh and shock, and I snap it shut.

  Anniston taps me on the shoulder, reading into my look as more shock than humor. “Don’t worry about it. The doorbell ringing gets him hard. You’ll get used to it.”

  I’m not going to correct her and tell her I’m already used to it. Hayes is my friend. My partner in crime. My horny compadre.

  I know—not from experience—that the slightest breeze hardens him in seconds flat. But for some reason, I keep mine and the guys’ relationship a secret. I know it’s stupid. After all, Anniston invited me to help out which led to this friendship with the guys, but I want to be stingy with them and not tell her I love them like brothers.

  Anniston pulls me from my thoughts, lightly touching my arm. “Come on. Let’s go talk in the kitchen.”

  Anniston made us something to drink, and we’ve been chatting about how things went during my two-week stay. She didn’t push me to get down to the nitty gritty reason I’m here. Instead, she had me tell her of my adventures with the guys. She laughed with me and genuinely seemed thrilled that we had bonded.

  It was her love and selflessness for the guys that had me wanting to speak up and be truthful. This woman was not my enemy. Yeah, she makes me feel insecure, but so what?

  Hence my random confession.

  “I pushed Cade when he wasn’t ready. I shouldn’t have kissed him,” I blurt out like someone with zero social skills.

  Anniston eyes me thoughtfully and takes a sip of her water. “Why don’t you think he’s ready? Did he tell you he wasn’t?” My mouth slams shut as she drills me with questions. “Did he not kiss you first?”

  Okay, she’s making this seem super simple, and it’s not. Cade has issues, and I didn’t consider them when I shoved my tongue down
his throat two days ago.

  “He did kiss me first. But that’s not the point.”

  Anniston adjusts in the chair and cocks her head to the side. “Is it because you’re getting close to him and he still doesn’t know about Bennett?”

  My stomach takes a swan dive right out of my ass. I blink back at the woman who is Cade’s most trusted confidant. She knows. This whole time she knew who I was.

  “Does he know?” I swallow and pull my knees under me.

  She makes a soft noise, her lips going tight at the corners. “I was hoping you would have told him by now.”

  And now I feel like the shittiest human on the planet.

  The vein in my forehead throbs, and I know it’s only a matter of time before my eyes will burn with tears. “I’m going to,” I whisper, unable to meet her eyes. “But he’s still so angry about the past that I’m afraid he won’t receive it well.”

  Anniston looks thoughtful as she twirls a strand of hair around her finger. “He probably won’t, you’re right.” The burning sensation arrives as predicted, and the first swell of tears accumulate at the corner. Anniston, unbeknownst to my imminent sobfest, forges on. “But that doesn’t mean he should be kept in the dark. It’s not good for his healing.”

  She’s right. Keeping this secret from him will only make things worse.

  “But he just started to warm up to me,” I plead, a lonely tear plummeting to its death onto my bare leg. Anniston eyes the wet spot and gives me a look like she may want to hug me.

  “He’ll come back around,” is all she says. The fact that she didn’t deny my guess at Cade’s reaction gives my heart palpitations like it’s already bracing for the inevitable heartbreak. Another tear slips out, and this time it accompanies a noise that sounds a lot like a cry.

  “Oh, B.” Anniston is out of her chair and has her arms around me in seconds. Her voice is comforting, and honest to God, she smells so good for someone who was just working out. Her flawlessness only adds insult to my already insecure state and I cry into her sports bra.