She let out a huge sigh. “I have to admit I’m relieved. I know Trask boating meant a lot to you and Billy, but there was no way I could step in and take his place. What I know about boats could fit on a postage stamp.”
Sawyer chuckled. Although Ava had always been supportive of their endeavor, she’d had very little to do with the running of the company. It had always been Billy’s dream rather than his own. With his full-time coast guard duties, he simply didn’t have the time or the energy to make a success out of it. “I’ll drop off a check as soon as the lawyer sends me the paperwork. It will be a nice chunk of change to put in the bank.”
Ava nodded along with his words. “It will be great to build up my savings. At the moment I feel very blessed to be able to stay at home with the twins, but sooner or later I’m going to have to go back to work.”
Sawyer frowned. He’d never even thought about Ava’s financial situation. Was everything all right on that end? He knew there had been some insurance money and a savings account, but he’d never asked about her finances. It would have felt too much like prying.
“Is everything okay on that front? I mean...is there anything I can do to help out?” he asked.
“We’re fine, especially now that the company has been sold,” she said. “We have some savings and the money from the life insurance policy, but that money won’t last forever. I have to plan for the future. Braces. Summer camp. College tuition. At some point I have to have money coming in. I think I’m ready to get back to work.”
He felt a burst of admiration for her. Knowing Ava as well as he did, he knew she was prepared to do whatever was necessary in order to care for her family. With all the talent and creativity she possessed, reviving her party planning business wouldn’t be difficult. Her comment about being a stay-at-home mom made him wonder if she ever treated herself to a night out with friends. Although she was clearly a dedicated mother, she still needed time away from her children. Doing so would give her a chance to connect with adults and unwind. With a coast guard event drawing near, he might just have the perfect way to get Ava out of the house. “Hey, before I forget, do you have any plans for the night of the Fourth?”
“Nothing special. We usually just watch the fireworks from the patio. Dolly has an aversion to loud noises, so we skip the parades and the fanfare.”
He crossed his arms across his chest, rocking back on his heels. At the moment he was acting on impulse, something he’d been doing a lot of lately. “The coast guard is having a party down at Sandy Neck. It’s strictly for grown-ups. Would you like to come?”
Ava’s eyes widened, and a surprised expression flashed across her face. “I don’t know, Sawyer. It’s been a while since I’ve done the social scene.”
“Maybe that’s the perfect reason for you to come hang out with us,” he reasoned. “I know how much you love the kids, but you need to get out more often. The twins might like a break, as well,” he teased.
“You sound like Sunny,” she grumbled. “She thinks I’m the most boring person on the planet.”
He let out a deep-throated laugh. “Well, prove her wrong. Come to the party. Good food, great music.” He pointed to himself. “Not to mention great company.”
Ava laughed and nodded. “Who could resist all that? Okay, I’ll come.”
“Great. Be there at seven,” he said. “By the way, thanks for my birthday surprise.” He leaned in and brushed a kiss against her forehead, his hands braced on either side of her face. She tilted her head upward, her expression registering surprise. The sudden impulse to place his lips on hers came over him, and he had to force himself not to follow his instincts. Instead, he took a step back, retreating from his up-close-and-personal view of her perfectly shaped pink lips.
She studied him, her eyes full of questions. “Sawyer, did you just ask me on a date?”
If her face hadn’t been so serious, he might have laughed out loud. How could he tell her he wasn’t even sure himself? All he knew for sure was he loved spending time with her. Ava made him feel things no other woman had ever kindled inside him. Being with her felt as natural as drawing breath.
“It’s whatever we want it to be, Ava,” he answered, his heart hammering a wild rhythm within his chest.
The beginnings of a grin began with the slight curving upward of her mouth, ending in a radiant, luminous smile. Relief flooded him. He’d gone out on a limb, putting himself out there to Ava in a way that he’d never done before. This was about way more than an enduring friendship. It was about possibilities. A feeling of euphoria washed over him, and he felt more free than he had in a very long time. And even though he knew he still had unfinished business with Ava, he just wanted to savor this perfect moment, even though it was only a reprieve. Soon enough he would have to face the music.
* * *
On Wednesday night, Ava was returning home after attending a fund-raiser meeting for the twins’ school. She’d enlisted Sunny to babysit the twins so she could participate. She couldn’t stop smiling as she drove down Ocean Street and then made the winding turn onto Sea Glass Lane. The mood in the meeting had been light and friendly, supportive and full of laughter. It hadn’t been awkward at all. Most of the faces were new to her, but a few were friends from high school who she hadn’t seen in ages. She let out a contented sigh. Although she’d felt unconnected to the townsfolk of Buzzards Bay for a very long time, the tide was beginning to turn. A feeling of satisfaction thrummed through her veins. She tapped her fingers against the steering wheel to the beat of the hit song on the radio.
Community. For so long now she’d taken her own community for granted. Her whole life she’d been blessed to have strong ties with the residents of Buzzards Bay and the congregation of Sea Street Church. She’d never had to worry about fitting in or being different. There had been no doubt she’d belonged to this town and its people. Pastor Felix, her sisters and Sawyer had all been right. Cutting herself off from her congregation and the folks in town had only led to her feeling disconnected and unhappy. She needed them, not only as a sounding board and a support system, but as a bridge between her and Sea Street Church.
Perhaps this was the first step in finding her way back to worship. Meeting the other mothers was an eye-opening experience. Oftentimes, she felt as if she were the only one going through the loss of a spouse or raising children without a husband by her side. That was the furthest thing from the truth. Tonight she’d met a woman named Peggy who’d not only lost her husband but had four children to support and nurture. All things considered, Ava felt a sense of gratitude wash over her.
When she pulled into her driveway, the house was lit up like a Christmas tree. Lights blazed from every window, including Dolly’s and Casey’s bedrooms. It was strange considering the twins had a bedtime of eight o’clock. The clock on her dashboard confirmed it was well past nine. It wasn’t like Sunny to disregard her wishes regarding the children. After parking her car she glanced down at her cell phone. Eight missed calls! Panic skittered along her nerves. She’d turned her cell phone off before the meeting started and had forgotten to turn it back on. A burst of adrenaline flooded her and she ran toward her house, charging through the door as if her feet were on fire.
Sawyer, Casey, Dolly and Sunny were calmly sitting around the kitchen table. Relief flooded her at the sight of her children safe and sound. Casey was sipping from an oversize mug while Dolly was munching on a chocolate chip cookie. Both of them gazed at her with wide, innocent eyes.
“What are you two doing up? Lights-out was over an hour ago.” She frowned at her sister. Sunny scowled right back at her.
“There was a little...incident,” her sister said. Sawyer glanced over at Casey, then shot her a look filled with meaning.
“What do you mean? What happened?” Her voice rang out more strident than she’d intended.
“Casey snuck out of the house a
fter lights-out and Auntie Sunny got scared really, really bad,” Dolly piped up. “And I got frightened, too, because it was getting dark outside.”
“Casey! What in the world were you thinking?” she asked as she struggled to make sense of her son’s disobedience.
Casey looked at her with fear shimmering in his eyes. He ducked his head down and mumbled, “I wanted to go see Uncle Sawyer. I had to ask him something really important. And Aunt Sunny said it was too late since it was bedtime.”
She shot a grateful look in her sister’s direction. “Auntie was right. You should have listened to her. And you can’t just show up at Uncle Sawyer’s house anytime you please.”
“When I arrived home after my shift, I saw this little guy sitting on my front steps waiting for me,” Sawyer explained. “I almost couldn’t believe my eyes.”
For a moment she was speechless. Even though Sawyer’s lighthouse was only a short walk down the beach, it frightened her to think of her child walking along a deserted stretch of beach at night. Buzzards Bay was a safe haven, but even the best communities had their fair share of trouble. And even though she welcomed Sawyer into their lives with open arms, she didn’t want either of her children treating him as a part of their everyday lives. As it was, they were drawn to him like a beacon. Even when they weren’t in his presence, they were talking about being with him. She needed to sit the kids down and set some boundaries. That way it wouldn’t be so painful when the day came for Sawyer to settle down with someone and start his own family.
Painful for whom? a little voice whispered. The twins? Or yourself?
Arms folded across her chest, she addressed her son. “I can’t believe you would go against your aunt’s wishes and our house rules,” she snapped. “Casey Trask, march yourself upstairs to bed after apologizing to Aunt Sunny and Uncle Sawyer.”
Casey mumbled apologies as tears gathered in his eyes. His expression hinted at defiance.
“Mommy, are we still going to the fair tomorrow?” Dolly asked.
“After tonight I’m not making any promises,” she said in a no-nonsense tone, her mind still whirling with her son’s antics. “It’s not my style to reward bad behavior.”
“That’s not fair! I didn’t sneak out of the house. He did,” Dolly shouted. She pointed a pudgy finger in Casey’s direction. “It’s all your fault!”
“No, it’s not my fault,” he screamed back at her. “If Mom just married Uncle Sawyer I wouldn’t have to sneak out after dark to see him. I could see him anytime I want!”
Chapter Nine
If Mom just married Uncle Sawyer I wouldn’t have to sneak out after dark to see him.
Casey’s statement left a hush over the room. Ava’s cheeks were flushed, although he couldn’t tell whether it was from anger or embarrassment. Sunny’s mouth hung open. Even Dolly was left speechless. He experienced a myriad of emotions. First and foremost, he felt a spark of joy that Casey thought so highly of him. He had to tell himself not to grin from ear to ear, especially since Ava looked so bent out of shape about it.
“It’s definitely past your bedtime,” Sunny announced as she grabbed each twin by the hand and hustled them out of the room. Groans and mumbles echoed in their wake.
“I—I don’t know where that came from,” Ava stammered. “Where would he ever get an idea like that?”
Sawyer shrugged. “Where does any of it come from? The imagination of a six-year-old boy. Don’t stress about it.”
She chewed her lip. “I can’t imagine what’s gotten into him tonight. Sneaking out of the house, being so incredibly disobedient and then trying to play matchmaker with us.” She ran her hand through her shoulder-length hair. “I’m going to have to put my foot down and punish him. Otherwise he’ll think I’m a pushover. Maybe he’ll have to miss out on the fair this year.”
Even though Ava was trying to sound as tough as nails, he could see the telltale signs of vulnerability. Her lips were trembling. Just the idea of making Casey miss the annual fair was doing a number on her. Sawyer saw all the doubt and worry reflected back at him. His heart constricted.
He reached out and gently placed his hand on her shoulder. Their eyes locked. Something in their depths made him pull her into his arms so that she could rest her head against his chest. He closed his eyes as she settled into the crook of his arm. A desire to protect her rose within him. He couldn’t stand seeing her so disheartened. Releasing her, he held her at arm’s length so he could look her directly in the eye.
“Ava, don’t you remember all the times we sneaked out past curfew so we could explore the beach at low tide?”
“But that was diff—” She stopped herself mid-sentence.
“Different?” he asked. “Not really. Casey’s not much younger than we were. We called ourselves explorers. Adventurers. Maybe he’s a chip off the old block.”
Ava shook her head and let out a soft chuckle. “When you put it that way, it seems like no big deal. But it still doesn’t feel right.” A sigh slipped past her lips. “Casey’s been going against the rules for months now. I think he’s testing me.”
“Or maybe he’s just being a kid.”
She blinked and seemed surprised by his words. Her expression eased up a bit, and she nodded. “Or maybe he’s just being a kid,” she acknowledged.
“I hate to bail on you, but I’ve got to get some sleep,” he said, covering his mouth with his hand as a yawn escaped. “I just worked a ten-hour shift and I’m wiped out. See you tomorrow, Ava.”
He bent down and placed a kiss on her forehead, his lips lingering for an instant longer than necessary. A fruity scent rose to his nostrils.
“I’m not making any promises about tomorrow,” she answered, her eyebrows drawn together in a mock gesture of fierceness.
He winked at her, knowing he would indeed be seeing her at the fair. As he walked back toward his lighthouse, his thoughts began to drift back to Ava. She was a big part of his world, and with every day that passed she and the twins were becoming more and more important to him. He’d never dreamed the feelings he harbored could grow even stronger. But they had. Over the course of the past few weeks, they’d magnified and strengthened like an oak tree firmly planted in the soil. And he could try to fool himself into believing it was something he could stuff down inside him. But he would only be lying to himself. He could no longer deny the depth of emotion he felt toward her, the push and pull in his direction he experienced every time he was within a five-mile radius of her beautiful, radiant face.
Try as he might, he couldn’t stop daydreaming about sharing another tender, wonderful kiss with Ava.
* * *
“Hey, are you two sure your mom won’t mind you having another corn dog?” Sawyer was standing with the twins at the concession stand, his hands full of corn dogs, juice boxes and French fries. “I mean, I’m not the food police, but you’ve already had hamburgers, chips and ice cream. In a few hours this could get ugly.”
Casey reached for his corn dog, his eyes wide with appreciation as he took a bite. Once he swallowed he answered, “We never get tummy aches. Our stomachs are made of steel.”
Dolly took a bite of her corn dog, letting out a sigh of appreciation. “We did get sick that one time, remember, Casey?”
The twins exchanged a look filled with hidden meaning.
“Wonderful,” he mumbled, wishing he’d cut them off before the corn dogs. “Your mom will be thrilled.”
Rule number one in dealing with kids, he reminded himself. Always be the adult in the situation. He made a mental note to tell Ava about their food consumption when they caught up with her at the fair. That way there would be no surprises if they happened to have bellyaches later on. It was hard for him to say no to Casey and Dolly. For some reason he wanted to give them everything—toys, games, outings. Most of all, his love and attenti
on.
If he could, he’d wrap the world up and hand it to them on a silver platter. On his part it was an attempt to make up for the void in their lives caused by their father’s death. And to fulfill his promise to Billy. He was still figuring out how to play a significant role in their lives without overstepping the boundaries. Ava had made it perfectly clear last night that there needed to be limits.
He took a quick glance at his watch. “Hey, why don’t we go find your mom’s booth?” he suggested. “It’s almost one o’clock.”
The coast guard, along with Sea Street Church and half a dozen other businesses and organizations, had joined together to raise money for Habitat for Humanity. They’d set up their annual fair at Sandy Neck Beach, complete with concessions, games, rides and contests. One hundred percent of the proceeds would benefit the organization. He’d been overjoyed to find out from Ava that she was manning the booth for Sea Street Church, along with a few members of the congregation.
When they finally located her, she was talking with a few other volunteers and handling the cash box. With her pretty floral dress, sun hat and silver sandals, she stood out like a beacon in the darkness. She looked lighthearted. And happy. A far cry from the woman she’d been two years ago. Even though he knew she would still have moments of grief and sadness in the future, he felt very strongly that she’d turned a corner.
When she’d told him about helping out with today’s event, he’d been overjoyed. Being a part of the church community would not only give support to Ava, but it would aid her on her spiritual journey.
“Mama!” Dolly cried as she spotted her mother and took off running toward her. Dolly scooted behind the table and latched on to her leg. Casey played it cool and kept pace with Sawyer, choosing to give his mother a simple hand wave rather than anything demonstrative.
“Aren’t you supposed to be at the coast guard booth?” Ava asked, her lips twitching in amusement. She reached out and grabbed a few French fries from his plate.
Forever Her Hero Page 11