Forever Her Hero

by Belle Calhoune

  He nodded toward the food. “As you can see, we got sidetracked.” He made a face. “I didn’t realize two six-year-olds could eat so much.”

  Ava laughed and nuzzled the top of Casey’s head. “Sorry about that. I forgot to tell you about their voracious appetites. They must be going through a growth spurt.”

  Growth spurts. Yet another thing he didn’t have a clue about. “I should get going so I can relieve Hank. He basically agreed to this kicking and screaming.” He rubbed his hands together gleefully. “I’m inviting you all to come on over to the coast guard booth and see if you can knock me down.”

  As a way of making money for the cause, the coast guard had set up a dunking booth. His shift began in five minutes. From what he’d seen earlier, the lines had been long and steady.

  “That should be interesting.” Ava had a twinkle in her eye. She fished around in her purse and produced a wad of bills. “What do you say, kids? Should we give it a shot?”

  “Yes! Yes! We want to try,” the kids responded enthusiastically, both of them talking over each other in their excitement.

  As soon as they reached the coast guard booth, Sawyer spotted Hank sitting on the perch making faces at some of his buddies who were trying to unseat him. Next thing you knew, Hank was in the water and the crowd was cheering and pointing. As soon as he saw him, Hank motioned for Sawyer to replace him. Judging by the look on his face, he’d had enough.

  Before he made his way over, he turned around toward Ava and the kids, casually tossing a comment in their direction before he walked away. “Hey, guys, on second thought, save your money. I have a feeling I won’t be getting wet today.” He raised his arm and flexed his muscles.

  Ava rolled her eyes. “That’s a mighty bold statement. Especially considering I was the pitcher for the Buzzard Bay All Stars. Or have you conveniently forgotten that fact?”

  Sawyer hadn’t forgotten a thing. As a twelve-year-old, Ava had been able to throw an amazing knuckleball. She’d led her team to two back-to-back undefeated seasons. Watching her pitch had been like experiencing a force of nature.

  Sawyer waved his hand in the air. “Girls can’t throw!” he taunted, deliberately trying to get Ava riled up. He loved it when she got a little feisty and competitive, the way she’d done when they were kids.

  Dolly huffed and placed her hands on her hips. She was tapping her sneaker against the ground. “That is not true, Uncle Sawyer! I’m the pitcher on my baseball team and I’m good. Very good,” she emphasized with a nod.

  “She’s a chip off the old block.” Ava’s voice was tinged with pride.

  “It’s true, Uncle Sawyer. Dolly is the best in our whole class, including me,” Casey piped up.

  Ava patted Dolly on the shoulder. “Don’t worry. He’s just trash-talking, trying to psyche us out before we take him down.”

  “You’re going down!” Dolly warned. Her eyes gleamed with anticipation, and her lips were curved in a gleeful smile. Casey looked back and forth between the two camps. His eyes were huge, and he was biting his lip. Sawyer felt a pang when he realized Casey was having a hard time choosing sides. Sawyer winked at him, letting him know it was all in good fun. The little guy looked relieved as he stepped up to the counter.

  As Sawyer settled himself on the perch, he made a funny face at Casey, earning him a stuck-out tongue. Casey tossed the four balls, not even coming close to hitting the target.

  Dolly eagerly took her brother’s place and stared Sawyer down with serious attitude. He forced himself not to smile, even though he could feel the corners of his mouth twitching in amusement. By the looks of it, Dolly meant business.

  Even though he was rooting for her to hit the target, Dolly missed it each time by only a hair. Everyone began chanting Ava’s name as she stepped forward and plunked her money down on the table. He barely had time to blink before the ball was whizzing toward him. Just as he heard the thwacking sound of the ball hitting the target, he felt his seat giving way beneath him. As his body hit the cold water, he let out a cry of surprise. When he emerged from the water, Dolly was throwing her hand in the air, celebrating. Casey was jumping up and high-fiving his mom. His coast guard buddies were hooting and hollering. A warm feeling spread through his chest at the sight of the three of them laughing.

  At the end of his shift, Ava was there waiting for him, towels in hand. Despite the warm midday sun, he was shivering from repeatedly being dunked in the water. He quickly dried himself, draping the towel around his neck when he finished.

  “Thank you, Sawyer.” The tone of her voice had him looking up to meet her gaze. The heartfelt look on her face had him melting like ice cream in the hot sun.

  “For what?” He tried to keep his tone even, to pretend as if he didn’t know what she was talking about.

  “For trying to take my mind off Casey’s disappearing act last night. For making me laugh. And for showing the kids such a good time. I appreciate it.”

  He let out a sigh and rolled his shoulders. “I guess I’m as subtle as a sledgehammer.”

  She reached out and touched his arm. “You’re great. I know you’re coming from a good place.”

  He met her gaze, trying to read her expression. It was important to tread lightly. “At the risk of sounding like a broken record, you’re not alone in this.”

  Her face took on a somber expression. She shrugged, her slight shoulders making her look vulnerable. It was deceptive, since Ava was one of the strongest, most courageous women he’d ever known.

  “If you need anything...or just want to talk, let me know. I’m here for you.”

  Ava’s chin quivered. “Thanks. Casey told me this morning that he’s been missing Billy more than usual.” She wrapped her arms around her middle and looked down at the ground. “You know, they say time heals all wounds. I’m not so sure about that. Some days it seems as if it were just yesterday. Then other times I feel as if it’s been forever since we last saw him.”

  Personally, he’d never liked the expression about time healing all wounds. From firsthand experience he knew that wasn’t always the case. Time hadn’t fully healed his broken heart when Billy and Ava had gotten married. Of course the pain had eased a bit over time. But he’d still had his heart kicked around, and it was debatable as to whether he still carried around some of those hurts.

  “I think some wounds never fully go away. But they do heal, leaving a scar behind. Our scars tell us a story, of where we’ve been, what we’ve been through. That’s how I like to look at it. We all have scars, Ava. You can’t really go through life without getting ’em.”

  She sent a tender smile in his direction, her eyes full of gratitude. “That’s how I feel sometimes. I’m healing, but scarred. So are the twins. There’s this little hole in their hearts that might always be there. Sometimes it feels like everyone is dancing around me. Everybody wants me to be exactly who I was before the accident. I’m still me, but forever changed. Does that make sense?”

  “It makes perfect sense. How could you possibly be the same woman after what you’ve endured?”

  Ava nodded. “You get it, don’t you? I don’t know how or why, but you understand. And I’m grateful for that.”

  She reached out and squeezed his hand, causing him to think about how well her hand fit in his. A perfect fit. Of course he understood, although she had no way of knowing why. After nearly losing his life in Sierra Leone, he considered himself a changed man. Traumatic events left indelible marks in people’s lives. Now he went out of his way to appreciate the things he’d always taken for granted. His relationship with the Lord was stronger, fortified under the most harrowing circumstances. Living the best possible life had new meaning. He considered himself to be truly blessed. Someday down the road, he hoped Ava would, too.

  As far as Ava was concerned, spending time at the fair had been the perfect way to pas
s a summer’s day. There had been so much laughter and joy today. As the activities wound down, she found herself on cleanup duty, packaging up items, gathering trash and picking up empty bottles and recyclable items from the sand. The goal of the volunteers was to leave the beach as pristine as they’d found it. Truthfully, she had to admit to herself that things were getting better as of late. She was feeling more upbeat, and her focus was on the here and now. She was finding joy in the simplest of things. A beautiful sunset. A walk on the beach. Casey’s infectious laugh. Dolly tickling her senseless. With the kids heading off to a playdate with friends, she didn’t have any plans for the rest of the day.

  Earlier this morning she’d packed up the rest of the items in Billy’s closet and dropped them off at a thrift store. The folks at the shop had been very grateful for her donation. Letting go of Billy’s things made her feel as if a weight had been lifted from her chest. The sight of Sawyer lifting one of the wooden partitions, his powerful muscles flexing with every movement, drew her attention toward him.

  As if he sensed her scrutiny, his gaze swung up to meet hers. There was something intense radiating from him. For a moment everything else fell away so that it seemed as if it were just the two of them. She wasn’t sure she could handle what was reflected in his eyes. There was too much pent-up emotion she was battling. And so much uncertainty about her feelings for Sawyer.

  She already felt a twinge of guilt about the way her mood had elevated the moment she’d spotted him. He made her feel safe and protected, as if nothing bad could happen on Sawyer’s watch. He always brought a smile to her face. Perhaps it was the vibe of positivity he radiated. Or the way he made her chuckle at the simplest of things. She felt content. And hopeful about the future.

  After unloading the partition Sawyer began making his way toward her, his stride full of power and certainty.

  “Where are the kids?” Sawyer asked as he scanned the area in their proximity. “Please don’t tell me they’re off somewhere eating cotton candy.”

  “One of their classmates invited them over to their house to play, so I don’t have to pick them up until later. They’re going to be tuckered out when they get home.”

  The fact that they’d wanted to spend time at a friend’s house made her happy. It had worried her to no end that the twins tended to stay at home rather than socialize with other kids. In the past few months they’d been spreading their wings more and more by venturing out of their comfort zone. And even though it ached a little bit to have them leave the nest, she was encouraging them to fly.

  Sawyer’s eyes roamed over her face as if he were trying to figure something out. “Ava, there’s something I need to talk to you about.”

  The serious tone of his voice caused her to tense up. There was this wild feeling in the pit of her stomach, making her uneasy. She held up her hand to hold him off as a sliver of awareness crept along her spine. She knew that whatever he had to say might change things between them. For better, for worse. She couldn’t be certain. Things might never be the same again.

  Was he going to tell her he was leaving Buzzards Bay again? Would she once again have to deal with losing him? Or was he going to say something that might forever shift the dynamic between them? Either way, she wasn’t ready for it. Not now. Not when she was flying so high on this happy, peaceful feeling.

  “Don’t, Sawyer,” she blurted out. “You have such an intense look on your face. I can’t handle anything heavy right now.” She studied his body language, noticing the way his frame shuddered and sagged a little. “I’m sorry. This day has been so carefree, so enjoyable. I just want that feeling to last a little longer.”

  He nodded, his eyes hooded. “I understand.” His voice sounded a little hollow, and for a moment she wanted to take back her words and hear what he had to say. She felt a little selfish denying him a voice, but she hadn’t planned on Sawyer discussing anything deep with her. What she was feeling caught her off guard. It started as ripples of awareness flowing through her. Now it was roaring inside her like a call to action. At this moment, more than anything, she wanted to celebrate being alive. Other than the twins, Sawyer was the one person in the world who made her want to lift her face toward the sun, raise her arms to the heavens and thank God for being able to wake up this morning.

  “If you’re finished here, can we just... Do you want to take a drive?” Unbidden, the words tumbled from her lips.

  The look of utter surprise on Sawyer’s face had her wishing she’d headed toward the safety of her car. For a few agonizing seconds she wondered if he was going to turn her down. A wide grin slowly began to take over his face as he nodded and reached for her hand.

  “Where are we headed to?” he asked. All the tension evaporated and his face held a boyish expression.

  “Barefoot Point Beach. I just want to get in my car and put the top down so I can feel the wind whipping through my hair. It’s been a while.”

  “Let’s do it.” Sawyer led her by the hand down the hill toward where her car was parked. Located half an hour’s drive from Buzzards Bay, it was the only beach in the area where you could find sea glass. As kids they hadn’t ventured to Barefoot Point often, but when they did it had been a rare treat. It had been a family affair—mothers, fathers, sisters, brothers—all of them spending the day swimming, picnicking, collecting seashells and basking in the sun.

  Most of all, they’d all enjoyed hunting for spectacular sea glass. At the end of the day, their buckets had always been filled to the rim with a rainbow-colored assortment—sea blue, green, amber, topaz, crimson.

  As she drove down the winding road toward the beach, she caught a glimpse of the brilliant blue ocean churning against the tide. Even from a distance she could make out figures hunched over on the beach collecting sea glass. At the sight of it joy bubbled up inside her. Few things made her feel like a little kid again, but this was certainly one of them. As she walked the beach with Sawyer, stopping every few feet to drop sea glass into their makeshift bucket, it turned into a joyous adventure.

  “I’m looking forward to the Fourth,” Sawyer said, reminding her of their plans. She made a mental note to make sure Nancy and Troy could still watch the kids. She bit her lip, wondering at their reaction when they discovered her Fourth of July plans were with Sawyer. No, she wasn’t going to think about anything negative. Not now. Somehow today had turned into an unexpected gem. It was like one of those moments when you were walking on the beach and stumbled upon the perfect shell. When was the last time she’d done anything spontaneous? Something just for herself?

  “I’m looking forward to it also,” she murmured. “And, Sawyer, thanks for being there for me today. You’ve helped make this day special.”

  Rather than say a single word, he reached out and squeezed her hand, his eyes dark with things left unsaid. She couldn’t explain, not even to herself, why it felt as if today was all about new beginnings.

  Chapter Ten

  “Thanks again for watching the kids tonight.” Ava’s in-laws had come over to the house so they could watch the twins for the evening while she was out. “They’re so excited you’re sleeping over.”

  “We love spending time with the grands, especially on Fourth of July.” Nancy gestured toward the patio. “And we can watch the fireworks from outside. You have a wonderful view from up here.”

  Ava’s mother-in-law was a petite, dark-haired beauty who looked years younger than her actual age. A fitness enthusiast, she claimed daily exercise kept her youthful. “So, where are you off to?” her father-in-law, Troy, asked. “You look mighty patriotic in that red, white and blue.” Ava looked down at her white jeans and the blue-and-red-striped shirt she’d owned forever. She’d rummaged all through her closet looking for something special to wear this evening to showcase her love for the U.S.A.

  “Sawyer invited me to a party at Sandy Neck Beach hosted by the
coast guard.”

  Troy’s body stiffened. His face hardened, the wrinkles near his eyes becoming more pronounced as he let out a low grunt. “You two seem to be spending a lot of time together,” he huffed.

  Her mother-in-law looked over at her husband. Her features were pinched. She seemed to be sending him a warning signal with her eyes.

  “Does that upset you?” Ava asked, surprised at Troy’s reaction. She had no intention of ignoring the elephant standing in the room, despite the tension crackling in the air. Although he’d hinted at his disapproval of her and Sawyer’s friendship on several occasions, she couldn’t remember Troy ever being so harsh.

  “I just don’t think it’s proper for you to be dating Sawyer.” He slashed his hand through the air. “There! I’ve said it. I have no problem with you wanting to move forward with your life. You’re young and beautiful. But, as the saying goes, there’s plenty of fish in the sea. You need to start fishing in another pond.”

  “Troy! That’s enough!” his wife admonished. “It’s not our business who Ava does or doesn’t date.”

  “We’re not dating,” she interjected. “We’re friends. Always have been.” But what if we were a couple? She wanted to ask. Would there really be an objection?

  He threw his hands in the air. “Call it what you like, but I’ve seen the way he looks at you. And I’m not blind to the way you look at him, either,” he barked. “And pretty soon the children are going to start asking questions about Mommy and Uncle Sawyer.” He tossed a pointed look in her direction before striding out of the kitchen.

  Ava sucked in a shocked breath. She’d never had a cross word with Troy in her life, yet their conversation had been full of tension and none-too-subtle digs. Did her father-in-law really believe she’d carry on with Sawyer right under the twins’ noses? The very thought wounded her. And did he think she was chasing after Sawyer like a dog hunting a bone? All that talk about fishing had her mind in a whirl.