Desperate Virgin

by Jacqui Penn

  ‘I think I’ll tell him I will marry him.’ She looked at Paul’s expressionless face. ‘What?’

  ‘I’ve only been gone long enough to buy a drink and you’ve decided to marry him. Fine! At least that’s one topic over with.’ Talking over Julie’s problems all the time was getting rather monotonous.

  ‘What do you think then?’

  ‘No more than I thought two minutes ago. It’s up to you.’ He picked up his drink and crossed his legs. She had hoped for more of an input, but she should know better with Paul.

  Dave took her out for a meal the following evening. Since he’d proposed he hadn’t pushed the subject, it wasn’t his way.

  Julie decided to tell him her decision over dinner. She wasn’t feeling as elated as she thought she should be.

  They sat at a table situated in a bay window.

  ‘Dave, I would like to marry you, if the offer still stands.’

  ‘Oh, Julie,’ he said, his face lighting up. He pushed his chair back, rushed around to her side of the table and knelt on one knee. ‘You don’t know how happy you’ve made me.’ He took her hand in his. ‘Julie, will you marry me?’

  ‘Yes, yes Dave, I will.’ She looked around at the other diners and felt a little strange doing this in the middle of the restaurant. He fumbled in his pocket and pulled out a ring box. He took her finger and pushed on a diamond solitaire.

  ‘You won’t regret it, Julie. I love you. I’ll look after you and the little ones.’

  ‘I know you will. Now will you go and sit down, people are staring?’

  ‘Let them! She’s agreed to marry me,’ he called out to people in the restaurant. A few claps and a couple of cheers sounded. Dave returned to his chair sporting a huge grin.

  Julie smiled at his jubilation. ‘When did you get the ring?’

  ‘I had it from the first day I asked you. Does it fit properly? I had to guess.’

  ‘Yes, it’s beautiful. Thank you.’ She looked at her finger throughout the meal. The ring was pretty, but had she made the right choice? Why did she doubt herself? She shouldn’t be thinking like this, she should be the happiest woman in the world. She looked at Dave; you’d think she’d given him the world.

  Chapter 6

  Fran had continued to live at Julie’s. She paid rent, helped with the bills and Julie liked her company.

  ‘Is that an engagement ring, Julie?’

  ‘Yes,’ Julie answered and held out her hand.

  ‘Why didn’t you tell me? You’re a dark horse.’

  ‘I’ve said yes, but I’m still not sure it’s the right decision. Dave is so kind and he’s a lovely man, but I’m not sure if it’s what I want.’

  ‘Julie, be careful. I married Ted under similar circumstances. I think my parents liked him more than I did. Ted is a lovely man. He’s loyal, honest, trustworthy, hard-working, pays the bills, and has no bad habits. That’s where it ends. No passion, no surprises, well apart from a trip on a barge, which I will never forgive him for.’

  ‘A barge?’

  ‘Yes, you must have heard about it. I said I wanted to broaden my horizons, so he hired a barge on the Norfolk Broads! Not quite what I had in mind. He had good intentions, but it’s whether that’s enough, and it wasn’t for me. We grew apart. Only when I looked back I saw poor Ted hadn’t changed at all. It was wrong right from the start, I just hadn’t realised and it took me a long time to find out.’

  Julie was awake for most of the night. Her mind in turmoil. She didn’t want to end up like Fran, stuck with someone she didn’t love. What sort of environment would that be to bring up children? There again, the twins would be better off if they had a father figure. Could she grow to love him? How could she know that? She had made a decision, said she’d marry him and still she doubted her decision was the right one. Was she just frightened of the unknown?

  Julie and Dave were meeting on Thursday for a meal. She had to decide by then. She couldn’t carry on like this for much longer. She’d felt like this before she agreed to marry him and nothing had changed.

  ‘So you said you’d marry him and now you’re back to where we were last week. Is it a female thing, or is it just you?’ Paul had a look of disbelief on his face. They were sitting in his front room sharing a Chinese take-away. ‘Look, let’s be straight. With Dave there’s going to be no surprises, you know exactly what you’re letting yourself in for. He’s just Dave.’ Paul had met him only once and thought he seemed a nice enough man. Surprisingly, Julie hadn’t fallen about in rapturous laughter the whole evening they were together, which was unheard of.

  ‘You sound like Fran. That’s what she said about her husband.’

  ‘You have to go with your instincts darling. I think deep down you know.’ For once he talked sense and what he said seemed helpful. Why would she be holding these doubts if she was sure? How could anyone ever be sure? Nothing in life could ever be a certainty except death. She should take a chance?

  Dave picked her up on Thursday and they drove to a favourite, local restaurant.

  ‘I couldn’t wait to see you. There’s so much to talk about. Shall we marry before the twins are born? I’d like to. And where, and what sort of wedding should we have?’ As he drove he kept looking around at her expectantly and then when he received no response he looked back to the road. ‘I thought you should give up work. The twins will be a full time job and I have plenty of money for all of us. Oh, and I thought if we got married before the twins were born, we’d at least have a proper honeymoon.’

  Sudden fear engulfed her. ‘Dave, stop! I can’t do this. I’m sorry it doesn’t feel right. All these questions haven’t even entered my head. They should have done. I love my job, I don’t want to give up work. Lots of people work when they have children. I need to adjust before I can make decisions like that. I feel like I can’t breathe.’ She began to cry.

  Dave pulled the car over to the kerb. ‘I’m sorry. Don’t cry, Julie. I guess I got carried away. Please, stop crying.’

  ‘I can’t marry you, Dave. I’m sorry, but it’s not right.’

  ‘Of course you can. Nothing’s changed.’ He sounded panicked. ‘I got carried along like a fool. Forget I said anything. We’ll do it however you like and when you want. Silly of me to say anything about your job. I thought it might be nice to have some leisure time before the babies were born. I was only thinking of you. I love you.’

  ‘I know.’ She wiped her tears on a handkerchief he’d handed her. ‘I can’t. I can’t do it and I can’t explain why. It doesn’t feel right.’

  He looked at her and knew his plight was hopeless. His voice quavered as he spoke. ‘We never sorted out that contract. Can we still be friends? I don’t want to lose you completely, Julie.’

  She nodded through her tears. ‘I’d like that.’

  ‘Shall I drive on to the restaurant, or do you want to go home?’

  ‘Do you mind taking me home?’

  ‘Not at all. I’ll always be there for you... Always.’

  ‘I know. Thank you, Dave.’

  Julie felt weird as she walked in the front door. She turned and waved him off and watched as he pulled away. She felt an immense feeling of sadness.

  Dave drove away a broken man. He loved her, didn’t she realise that? He would do anything for that girl. Tomorrow he would send her a bouquet of flowers, he couldn’t lose her. He’d pushed her too far and too fast. He should have taken it slowly, let her take the lead. He’d tried to be assertive and it hadn’t worked.

  His late wife had told him he wasn’t to sit back and let everyone else make the decisions. Sometimes a woman liked a man to take control, not too often, but now and again. She had said that when he met someone else he should be himself, but try and think of what he would like instead of going along with someone else’s ideas. Well, thanks a lot, Chrissy; that hadn’t worked! He’d told her he’d never want anyone else so it wasn’t going to be an issue. He hadn’t foreseen Julie coming along.

  Darling Jul
ie. She’d had so much to deal with lately she didn’t know what she wanted. Her hormones would be upside down with the pregnancy. All he could do was wait until she changed her mind again. He could wait; he had all the time in the world.

  Dave woke after a restless night. He knew he had a weak attitude. He’d been so accommodating and somewhere along the way he’d fallen into the role of confidant and friend. It had been enough at the start when he didn’t have any confidence and just wanted to put the feelers out, but now? Now, he wanted that woman and he was damn sure he was going to get her.

  He had to regain the stamina he’d had years ago, before he became comfortable in his marriage and let himself slip into doormat mode. He hadn’t really been a doormat, but he and his wife had a loving and secure life together with little confrontation. There wasn’t a lot of need for stamina.

  Julie was different. She was younger and needed a man. That’s why she fallen for that idiot Simon and not him. Who would have fallen for him? Mr nice, Mr boring more like! He picked up his phone and cancelled a couple of things he was due to do that day.

  Dave showered, dressed and went into town. He had to ramp up the playing field. The first thing he did was buy a copy of the Fifty Shades book. He needed to find out what type of man Julie liked. He was on a mission.

  He sat in a coffee shop, with the book hidden in the newspaper he’d also bought, and began to read. After two coffees, he realised he’d have to go home to continue reading. The book was a bit more involved than he’d realised. At home, as he read on, he realised he couldn’t be a Mr Grey if he tried. Julie wanted quite a lot from a man if that was what she was after.

  The weekend passed slowly. Dave couldn’t do all that stuff in the book, he just wasn’t like that. He sat at the kitchen table and scrolled through the paper he’d bought to cover the book in the coffee shop. Maybe he should just go back to the speed dating, or try a proper agency. If he wasn’t Julie’s type it would never work out. He turned to the personal ads. So many dating sites; so many desperate people wanting a partner.

  His eyes fell on an advert. He read it twice, before pouring himself a whiskey. He’d need some courage before he made the call. The answer to his problem. He picked up his phone and tapped in the number.

  A few weeks later, Julie stood at the stove making poached eggs on toast, when the doorbell rang. She finished squeezing a t-bag and hurried along the hall. A man stood before her carrying the largest bouquet of flowers she’d ever seen.

  ‘Julie Webster?’

  ‘Yes.’

  ‘There you go then.’ He smiled. The surprise bouquets were always the best to deliver.

  ‘Thank you.’ She closed the door and pulled the delivery card out of the small envelope.

  Julie,

  Beautiful flowers for a beautiful woman.

  Hope they brighten your day.

  Dinner tonight? Pick you up at eight.

  Love as always,

  Dave xxx

  Julie brought the flowers up to her nose. They smelled gorgeous. Fran came down the stairs.

  ‘Flowers! How lovely. From Dave, I’m guessing?’

  ‘Yes, he wants to take me out to dinner tonight.’

  ‘You see that’s the difference. A surprise now and again always does the trick. You’ve got a good one there.’

  ‘But you said I should be careful.’ She’d been too upset to tell Fran what had happened with Dave.

  ‘Oh, don’t take any notice of me. I was having a terrible day on... can’t even remember which day it was, there’s been so many bad ones lately.’

  ‘I’d better find a vase and ring Dave to thank him.’

  Julie placed the flowers in two vases and put one in the front room and one on the window ledge in the kitchen. Then she picked up the phone.

  ‘Hello Dave.’

  ‘Julie, how are you?’

  ‘Thank you for the flowers. They are beautiful.’

  ‘And dinner?’

  ‘Yes please. Looking forward to it.’

  She put the phone down and felt a sense of relief. He was a true friend. Had she made the right decision? Oh my God! Don’t start all that again. For once she felt happy. Best to leave things alone for a while.

  Chapter 7

  Dave picked her up promptly at eight. Tonight there was something different about him. ‘You look different. Is it new clothes?’

  Dave put the car into gear and pulled away. ‘Yes, I did go shopping and bought a few bits. Sent a whole load of my old stuff to the charity shop.’

  ‘You look good. You’ve changed your hair too, I like you’re new look.’

  ‘Thanks.’ He cleared his throat. ‘I’m taking you to my house this evening. All this going out all the time isn’t natural. I want to show you who I really am.’

  Julie looked surprised. ‘Oh okay. I’m intrigued.’

  They drove on in silence until Dave stopped outside a detached house. ‘Here we are then.’ He opened her car door and led her into the house and through to the lounge. ‘What would you like to drink? Juice, cola, tea, coffee or some pina colada without alcohol?’

  Julie smiled. There was something about him tonight that she couldn’t quite put her finger on. ‘I think I’ll have to try the pina colada, please.’

  ‘Sit yourself down.’ He went off to get the drinks.

  Julie looked at a painting of a foreign village set in rolling hills. Another picture was of a man playing a guitar. A small silver plate said Glastonbury 1998.

  Dave came back and handed her a glass of pina colada with a cocktail umbrella and a cherry on a stick. ‘Thank you.’

  Dave nodded towards the picture. ‘Did you recognise me?’

  Julie looked back at the picture. ‘You? Is that really you? At Glastonbury?’

  Dave nodded. ‘Sit down, Julie.’ He put his glass down and went out of the room. She heard him going upstairs. He returned with a shiny red guitar and plugged it in to a sound system she hadn’t noticed. He strummed up a few notes and then played and sung Lay Lady Lay.

  Julie was moved and covered her mouth with her hand. His voice was fabulous. He carried on singing one song after another looking into her eyes. Somehow he looked younger than before and his eyes held a sparkle she’d never seen. He strummed the final note, and lifted the guitar over his head leaning it up against the wall before turning off the system.

  ‘That was fantastic. Why didn’t you tell me you played?’ Julie asked.

  Dave shrugged. ‘I wasn’t sure I would ever play again.’ He sat next to her on the sofa. ‘I’ve lost who I am these past few years. Chrissy, my wife, had been ill with cancer for about two years before she died. I played the role I had to while she was here and then just lost myself when she went.’ Julie put her hand on his leg.

  Dave turned and kissed her gently on the lips, and she responded. His tongue probed between her lips and they fell back onto the sofa cushions. He undid the buttons on her blouse and fondled her breasts before working his hand around her back and unfastening her bra. Her nipples were erect as he took each one in turn and ran his tongue around them before making her squeal with delight as he nibbled them. He ran his hand down to her jeans, undone the button and slowly lowered the zip, still tantalising her nipples.

  Julie melted as he entered her.

  They laid in breathless exhaustion, their arms wrapped tightly around one another.

  ‘Was that what you wanted to show me?’

  Dave laughed. ‘Not exactly, I intended taking it slowly. But actually, that is much more me than that boring fart you thought I was.’

  ‘I never thought you were a boring fart.’

  He raised himself up onto one arm and looked at her. ‘I was sort of locked in no-man’s land. Not really caring too much about anything. That night when I was over-enthusiastic was the first time in four years that I’d wanted to do something. I’m sorry.’

  ‘Don’t be. So what happened to snap you out of the doldrums?’

  ‘You, and
a therapist named Sheila who I’ll tell you more about over dinner.’ He looked at his watch. ‘We’d better get a move on, we’re supposed to be having dinner in fifteen minutes.’

  Julie leapt up and started pulling her clothes on. ‘Well, I like this new you. Much more exciting.’

  ‘But not as exciting as Mr Grey.’

  ‘How do you know about him?’

  ‘I read the book to see what you liked.’

  Julie screeched. ‘No! Tell me that isn’t true.’

  ‘It is true. Now hurry up, we’re going to be late.’

  Chapter 8

  Julie had planned to work until the babies were born. She’d been advised that because they were twins, there might be a chance they’d arrive early, the midwife had told her as much.

  Dave had taken her out for a meal. Although Julie felt like a beached whale, going out for a meal with Dave was a favourite treat which she’d miss once the twins were born.

  Unusually, she hadn’t eaten much that evening. She stood to go to the ladies’ room and felt warm liquid rush down her legs.

  ‘Oh my God! My waters have broken! How embarrassing is that? We can’t come here again.’

  ‘It’s okay, don’t worry. We’ll get you to the car and off to the hospital.’

  ‘I need to collect my bag from home.’

  ‘Okay. Is the bag packed ready?’ Dave was in a state of shock and nervousness, but he needed to stay calm for Julie. She nodded and told him it’d been ready for weeks.

  She got into the back of the car and put her legs up along the seat. She rang the hospital to give advance warning of her arrival and then she rang Paul. He didn’t answer so she left a voice message.

  ‘They’re on the way. Just off to the hospital. Wish me luck.’ She clicked the phone off.

  ‘Oh Dave, I’m glad you’re with me. Mum said to ring her as soon as anything happened, but I think I’ll leave that call for a while.’

  Dave wasn’t sure he wanted to be first in command, the prospect was daunting, but he had to try and do his best, there was no one else. He took Julie’s keys and found the bag, zipped up and ready to go exactly where she said it would be. So far, so good! He drove steadily to the hospital and followed the signs for the maternity wing.