Secret-Santa Cowboy: The Buckskin Brotherhood
Page 18
“But if you read this, you’ll know how much she cared. She truly loved you.”
“In her way.” A trace of bitterness tinged his words. “But we could have had so much more.”
This was hitting way too close to home. “Maybe she gave you all she could.”
“I believe she did, at the time, but if she’d screwed up her courage… we could have had it all.”
Chapter Thirty-One
The aroma of beef stew filled the air in the two-story ranch house that Leo had grown to love almost as much as the bunkhouse. Henri had never been a fan of turkey, and he’d been relieved to discover she regularly served beef stew on Christmas. His memories of his family’s traditional Christmas dinners weren’t great, so any deviation was welcome.
Over the years, one pot had grown to two. This time Henri had made it early so they could take some to CJ and Isabel in the middle of the day. Because Isabel’s parents and sister continued to have travel issues, a visit from the Buckskin gang bringing servings of beef stew and pumpkin pie had been a big hit.
Another glimpse of Cleo Marie had provided conversation for the rest of the afternoon. Following tradition, everyone rotated between working in the kitchen and playing board games in Henri’s living room. A debate about the baby’s light wisps of hair hadn’t ended yet. Was it newborn fuzz or evidence she’d be blond like her daddy?
The little girl had opened her eyes when Jake had been in the room and he’d sworn they were CJ’s exact shade of blue. Others claimed a newborn’s eyes could change color, just like a newborn’s hair.
Leo contributed to both debates, looking up info on his phone and relaying it to the group. Focusing on Cleo Marie helped fill the aching void in his chest. Teasing Jake and Millie about their gonzo proposal scenario and chiming in on their plans for a New Year’s Eve wedding helped, too.
He took a moment to tell Henri about Mrs. Warner and little Georgie. Henri promised that she and the Babes would help Georgie’s mom find a job that would pay enough to hire a sitter. He was glad he’d mentioned it, but unfortunately the subject had Fiona memories attached. He opened another bottle of cider.
Then Eva disappeared into a back room with her phone. That move wouldn’t have to be related to Fiona, but it was dusk and Fi should be heading over to the cemetery about now.
When Eva came back, she had a whispered conversation with Nick. Had to be about Fiona’s stakeout at the cemetery. Last night Leo had been curious about the outcome. Now it was just one more thing to let go of. He finished off the cider and went to fetch more.
Ed’s video had been downloaded to Ben’s laptop. Between dinner and dessert, he’d hook it up to Henri’s flat screen so they could all watch. Leo kept eyeing the laptop sitting over by the TV.
It looked perfectly innocent, as if it wasn’t armed with a video that would break his heart. His favorite part of a Buckskin Christmas had become his worst nightmare.
When dinner was delayed because Henri forgot to put the rolls in the oven, he was thrilled. Maybe he’d be toasted by the time Ben cued up the video and watching it wouldn’t hurt as much.
Eventually the rolls were ready and the line formed to cruise the feast laid out on the dining room table. Filling a plate and then jockeying for a spot in the living room was half the fun. Or it had been, before his dreams imploded.
Nick coached Eva, the newbie, to be bold.
“How bold?” Eva gazed at him.
He winked. “Bold like musical chairs. Which means watch out for Jake. He cheats.”
“I don’t cheat.” Jake puffed out his chest. “I strategize. Right, Millie?”
She smiled. “Let’s just say you’re a master at walking a fine line.”
“I like that. Maybe I’ll have it engraved on my tombstone.”
“Keep holding up this line and you’ll be needing that tombstone sooner than you think.” Rafe sent him a warning glance.
Leo’s appetite had vanished and he didn’t care how long Jake took to get his food. But he joined in the razzing as the Brotherhood gave Jake a hard time for being a slowpoke. He was determined to keep up appearances.
It was likely a wasted effort. Everyone in the room had the relevant news about Fiona. But he didn’t want to shine a light on his personal misery tonight. It was Christmas. He’d deal.
He chose the end of the line, though, because it reduced the likelihood that anyone would notice he didn’t dish himself much. Garrett was ahead of him and had just filled his plate and stew bowl when somebody knocked on the door.
Leo took a breath to calm his jangling nerves. It wasn’t her. Couldn’t be her. Not after what she’d said to him last night. Or more to the point, hadn’t been able to say.
“I’ll get it.” Garrett put down his food at the end of the table.
Smiling to himself, Leo picked up a stew bowl and plate. Before the initiation, Garrett would never have presumed to answer Henri’s door. But now he was a member of the Brotherhood, a man who subscribed to the Brotherhood’s creed. What would Charley do? He’d answer the door.
If Leo had to guess, he’d say one of the Babes had dropped by. But the woman’s voice that drifted from the open door wasn’t one of the Babes.
His mouth went dry. He was hallucinating. Wishful thinking. Shouldn’t have had the third bottle of cider.
As Garrett brought the visitor into the living room, Leo put down his half-filled plate and walked through the archway.
“I found this Christmas elf on the doorstep.” Garrett managed to sound casual about it. “She wants to sing for us.”
He couldn’t breathe. Clearly the elf costume was significant, but he couldn’t figure out why.
She glanced his way, her cheeks flushed. Clearly this wasn’t easy for her.
Then she faced the group in the living room. The men had scrambled to their feet at her arrival. “Sorry I’m late. Henri, this is for you. Hostess gift.” She held out a leather journal.
Henri walked over and took it, giving Fiona a warm smile. “That’s fabulous. Thank you.”
“So, here’s my song, inspired by… family. And love.” Taking a deep breath, she launched into We Wish You a Merry Christmas except she substituted I for we and added a jaunty dance step to the number.
Her bravery and fortitude cracked his heart wide open as she pushed her way through the words of the song. She was battling her demons so they’d have a chance. If he’d loved her before, it was nothing compared to the fierce emotion that gripped him now.
She finished, bowing as the group cheered. The applause kept going, not because it was a spectacular performance, although it was cute as hell. But everyone in the room understood what her return meant to him.
Blushing, she sent him another sideways glance.
He got the message. She needed a graceful way to leave the stage. He stepped forward and took her arm. She was trembling. “Fiona and I have some business to discuss. If you’ll excuse us, we’re heading out to the porch.”
“Turn off the porch light on your way out!” Jake called after them.
He didn’t. He wanted to see her, wanted to look into her eyes as she said whatever she’d come to say.
She’d left her red wool coat on the coat tree by the door. He helped her into it before putting on his jacket. Then he ushered her out to the porch.
After he closed the door, he hauled her into his arms. “You’re here.”
“I needed to—”
He cut her off with a kiss. She didn’t need to tell him anything. If she’d come to this dinner, the future was bright. Starting now.
She kissed him back, but then she pulled away. “Don’t you want to know why I’m here?”
“Don’t care.” He lowered his head.
She dodged away. “Well, I care and I want you to hear me out.”
He paused, intrigued by her bold response. She was speaking in complete sentences again. He didn’t want to stop that momentum, especially while she was looking right at him. “Yes, ma’am
.”
“I went to the cemetery tonight.”
“I thought so. Figured that’s who Eva was texting with.”
“I was in communication with her and Beth, but they don’t know how it turned out. You’re the first person I’ve told. For a reason.”
He gazed at her in breathless anticipation. “What reason?”
“I don’t want to be like Winifred Barton. I want to be like Henri Fox.”
“Meaning?”
“Forty-some years ago, Winifred was madly in love with Orville Dubois and—”
“The old guy who sits by the potbellied stove in the Apple Barrel General Store?”
“Like I said, that was more than forty years ago. He was several years younger than she was, and although he didn’t see it as a problem, she did. She broke off their secret affair because he wanted to marry her. She said they were creatures of the night and could never be more.”
He tightened his hold. “Sounds like someone I know.”
“That’s why I’m here. She broke his heart. I don’t want to break yours. Or mine.”
Warmth filled his chest. “That’s very good news.”
“Henri was scared last night, but she sang anyway. For Ben’s sake, but for hers, too. I was petrified in there, but—”
“You didn’t look scared.” It was only a tiny fib.
“Oh, I’m sure I did, but when I finished, I felt like a million bucks.”
“I’m so in love with you, Fi.” He couldn’t go another second without saying it.
Her gaze locked with his. “I was worried that you’re only in love with the seductive person you met in the dark.”
“I know. But I’m not. I spent quality time with the person wearing the elf suit.”
“That’s exactly why I wore it. My goal is to blend those two versions of me so you have the whole picture.”
“That should take about five minutes.”
She grinned. “Tonight?”
“It’s a date.” He dragged in a breath. “And let me clarify. I’m not just in love with you. I love you. Full stop.”
She looked up at him as the light in her eyes grew brighter. And brighter still. “I’m finally ready to believe that.”
“Thank God.”
“You had me from the moment you did your trick-riding at the auction. But I wouldn’t let myself love you.”
“And now?”
“I’m going to love you with everything in me. I’m going to love you like you’ve never been loved. I’m going to—”
He kissed her, making that magic connection. She loved him. She loved him. Did that mean…. He lifted his head. “No more darkness?”
“No more darkness. Only light. And love.”
“One more kiss. Then we’ll go inside.” As his lips met hers, he made a silent promise. He would give her all the light and love in his heart. Because that was what Charley would do.
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Coming February 2021!
Newest member of the Brotherhood, Garret Whittaker, proves there’s more to him than meets the eye in STAND-UP COWBOY, book seven in the Buckskin Brotherhood series!
But Wait, There’s More!
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Want more sexy cowboys? Then say hello to the McGavin Brothers of Eagles Nest, Montana!
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Praise for Vicki’s cowboy series
“Vicki Lewis Thompson has a reputation for putting enough sizzle between the pages to actually create steam.”
Fresh Fiction
“This modern cowboy tale expertly balances sex and emotion with a touch of humor. It’s one of the hottest western romances of the year!”
RT Book Reviews
“Once again Ms. Thompson’s writing is crisp and straightforward, with an uncanny ability to weave the beautiful western landscape of the Grand Tetons into the storyline. Overall a hot, sexy read.”
Harlequin Junkie
Also by Vicki Lewis Thompson
The Buckskin Brotherhood
Sweet-Talking Cowboy
Big-Hearted Cowboy
Baby-Daddy Cowboy
True-Blue Cowboy
Strong-Willed Cowboy
Secret-Santa Cowboy
The McGavin Brothers
A Cowboy’s Strength
A Cowboy’s Honor
A Cowboy’s Return
A Cowboy’s Heart
A Cowboy’s Courage
A Cowboy’s Christmas
A Cowboy’s Kiss
A Cowboy’s Luck
A Cowboy’s Charm
A Cowboy’s Challenge
A Cowboy’s Baby
A Cowboy’s Holiday
A Cowboy’s Choice
A Cowboy’s Worth
A Cowboy’s Destiny
A Cowboy’s Secret
A Cowboy’s Homecoming
Wild About You
Werewolf in Manhattan
Werewolf in the North Woods
Werewolf in Seattle
Werewolf in Denver
Werewolf in Alaska
Werewolf in Las Vegas
The Nerd Series
Nerd in Shining Armor
The Nerd Who Loved Me
Nerd Gone Wild
Gone with the Nerd
Talk Nerdy to Me
Nerds Like It Hot
My Nerdy Valentine
About the Author
New York Times bestselling author Vicki Lewis Thompson’s love affair with cowboys started with the Lone Ranger, continued through Maverick, and took a turn south of the border with Zorro. She views cowboys as the Western version of knights in shining armor, rugged men who value honor, honesty and hard work. Fortunately for her, she lives in the Arizona desert, where broad-shouldered, lean-hipped cowboys abound. Blessed with such an abundance of inspiration, she only hopes that she can do them justice.
Connect with Vicki online!
VickiLewisThompson.com
VLTAuthor@aol.com