The Accidental Assassin (Assassins #1)
Page 16
“Ava, did you use my phone?” Owen walked into the kitchen, his expression blank.
Busted.
“Um, yeah. I sent an email the other day.”
“No, no. Say it like you aren’t guilty.” Mavis perked up. “Make him feel bad for asking. You’ve got to mean it. ‘Of course I sent an email. Did you expect me to sit around and do nothing while evil henchmen stalked me?’”
“Um.” I looked back at Owen who was staring at me. His blank expression was slipping into one of frustration. “Did she respond?”
“No.” His voice was calm.
“Oooh. He’s mad.” Mavis sat back in her chair and crossed her arms.
“Would you stop it?” I glared at her.
“Yes, just like that, but to him.” She jerked her chin in Owen’s direction.
“I’m serious. You’re making this worse.” I chewed on my bottom lip. I felt like I’d betrayed him. And he found out just after his brother had tried to kill him.
“Oh, good.” Mavis smiled and I pictured punching her face. Maybe I’d get in one good hit before she reacted. Her smile wilted and she rolled her eyes. “Okay. Fine. I’ll go. But I’m going to listen from the other room.”
She took her time extracting herself from the table and walked slowly across the linoleum. She had taken her tall shoes off and she seemed even smaller next to Owen. Her hand darted out and she rubbed his good arm. He leaned down and listened to something she said. Jealousy bubbled up my throat and I squashed it. He wasn’t mine. I had no real claim to him, just a fictional story to hide behind in public.
When she walked off he sat down in her chair and watched me.
“I emailed Tessa. I used our old email addresses. She probably hasn’t even gotten it.” I lowered my voice, certain that Mavis would follow through with her threat to listen from the other room.
“I thought you agreed to not contact her.” He sat his phone down on the table.
“I figured that no one would look for email addresses we used years ago, but if Tessa thinks I’m in trouble she will go through everything.”
He sighed and looked up at the ceiling. “I’m trying.”
“Trying to what?” I cringed a little.
“To not lose my temper. Mavis reminded me that you aren’t like us. You don’t know how to handle this.” He lifted his good shoulder. “You’re normal.”
I narrowed my eyes. “Thank you for that glowing compliment.”
“I just meant you were bound to do something like this.”
“Like what?” I leaned back in my chair and crossed my arms. “Like worrying about a dear friend and trying to warn her that she was in trouble?”
“Exactly.” He leaned forward. “These people are the real thing. If your parents kept journals, they will find them. An active email account you don’t use anymore? That’s just a few minutes of work. If she responds, they will know exactly where she’s staying.”
“So I was just supposed to sit back and let her blunder into this mess? She’s family. She’s all I’ve got left and I’m going to try to keep her safe.” I stood up. “I might be normal, but I’m not stupid. I knew if I asked you again, I would get the same answer. So I took an opportunity when I saw it.”
“That’s not—”
“No, it’s okay. Go yuk it up with Mavis. I don’t know how to hogtie a three hundred pound man. I can’t speak Mandarin or German. I don’t know how to disassemble and reassemble an assault rifle in twenty seconds. I’m just a boring old normal person, scared out of my mind and trying to keep my only friend and myself alive.” I wasn’t making sense but I didn’t care. I thought I’d been pretty calm considering everything that I’d gone through. Apparently the word normal was my secret trigger.
For the first time since I’d met him, Owen looked frightened. I checked over my shoulder to see if someone was standing behind me, but there was no one there. Go figure. The man could kill people with a punch but my meltdown scared him.
Turning on my heel I stomped out of the kitchen. Mavis was sitting in an old wingback chair next to the stairs. She gave me a thumbs-up and I growled at her. She was not nearly as funny as she thought. There wasn’t much upstairs, but I couldn’t go back downstairs. What was the point of storming away if I just went right back?
I picked the room Owen had used earlier and slammed the door.
I’d like to say it made me feel better, but it didn’t. I could go open and slam shut the door another forty times and I still wouldn’t feel better. I wasn’t pissed at Owen.
No, I was sort of pissed at Owen. I was pissed at how he and Mavis seemed to have a connection I’d never understand. I wasn’t stupid. I knew they’d slept together. That wasn’t why I was mad at him.
Was it? No.
I was pissed at this whole situation. Every single bit of it. I hated feeling lost and out of my element. I didn’t even have the gun Owen had given me anymore.
I stomped back to the door and flung it open.
“And I want my damn gun back!”
I slammed the door again.
I was really tired of feeling helpless. I kicked the little table next to the bed.
It fell apart as if it was made of paper. The lamp and picture frame fell to the floor with a crash, the glass scattering across the old carpet.
“Oh, shit.” I stepped carefully through the glass and tried to pick up the table. One of the legs fell back to the floor. “Well, fuck.”
“Ava?” Owen knocked on the door.
“What?” I leaned the rest of the table against the wall and kicked some of the glass under the bed.
“Are you okay?” It sounded like he was leaning against the door and listening.
“I’m having a discussion with the furniture.” I picked up the remains of the picture frame and set it on a shelf. I picked up the lamp and sighed. It was in three pieces all held together by the cord that ran through the center. It was a lost cause. There was nothing to do for it but sing some hymns and bury it. If only I had a roll of Owen’s duct tape.
He cleared his throat outside the door. “I brought your gun.”
I walked over to the door and pulled it open with my free hand, letting the lamp dangle from the other.
He was standing in the little hall, both hands by his side. A smaller gun was in his left hand, his larger version in his right.
“And you brought yours. Are we dueling? Pistols at sunset?” I held out my hand and took my gun.
“I didn’t mean to upset you.”
I looked at him. How was I supposed to explain that I’d just thrown a spectacular temper tantrum without sounding pathetic? I’d broken some sick old man’s lamp.
“I’m sorry, Ava.” He stepped a little closer and lowered his voice.
Tears welled up in my eyes and I looked down at the floor. Damnit. Now was not the time to angry-cry.
“I’m not mad at you.” I took a breath and tried to will away the tears.
“You were rather convincing downstairs.” He stepped into the room and closed the door behind him.
I turned around and put the lamp on the table and it crashed back to the floor. I stared at the mess on the floor and sniffed.
“Stupid table.” I covered my face with my free hand.
“Are you crying?” Strong hands closed on my shoulders and turned me around. “Did you hurt yourself?”
“I’m not stupid!” I meant I wasn’t stupid enough to hurt myself, but at this point I wasn’t so sure. I might win a stupid award tonight.
“Of course you aren’t.” Owen’s voice took on a soothing tone. It should have been weird to hear it come from his mouth, but it wasn’t. He took my gun out of my hand and set it on the dresser next to his.
“I mean, I didn’t hurt myself. I broke the lamp.”
“I noticed.” His hands rubbed my shoulders. “I’m sorry for what I said downstairs.”
“Don’t be. I’m not mad at you. You just made a good target.” I wiped at my face. “I’m
scared. I’ve been in scared mode for days now and it’s starting to wear on me. And I’m worried about Tessa. And Mavis’s friend that I’ve never even met. Maybe I shouldn’t have sent the email, but it was killing me to feel like I was doing nothing. I feel like dead weight. I’m useless.”
“You are not useless.” He lifted my chin and I hoped there wasn’t any snot on my face.
“Don’t patronize me. I can’t contribute. I have no money. I can’t kill people. Well, unless it’s with a car. My last job was as a receptionist at a place where they build planes. Knowing how to deal with rich customers and answering the phone isn’t exactly helpful right now. I can make a killer pair of earrings but they aren’t going to actually kill anyone.” I sniffed. “I’m just trying to stay alive. You—you got shot because of me. And now—now I’m crying which isn’t helpful either.”
The tears were coming now and there was no stopping them. He pulled me against his chest and tucked my head under his chin. He didn’t say anything, just held me while I cried.
When I finally got myself under control I pulled back and scrubbed at my face with the palms of my hands.
“I’m sorry I unloaded on you.”
“I think you’ve earned it.” He pulled me over to the bed and sat down. I sat next to him and stared at the broken glass on the dirty carpet. “You shouldn’t have sent that email and I should have understood why you did it. I’ve been in tight spots before, but this is… pretty bad. I’ve been in worse, but this one isn’t a cake walk either.”
“You’ve accidently run over a man, been shot at by strangers for no reason, run away with a hot assassin, and let someone shield you from bullets like a pathetic non-warrior before?” I glared at him.
“You know, if you keep calling me hot, I’m going to start to think you like me.” His green eyes twinkled in the dim light.
“Shut up.” I shook my head but couldn’t help the giggle that escaped. “I think I got snot on your shirt.”
“It’ll just mix in with the blood from my heroic act today.” He smiled and my heart sped up.
“It goes nicely with the mothball smell.”
“I didn’t have many options.” He lifted his arm and sniffed the sleeve. “It is pretty strong though.”
“What do we do now?” Some of the tension had seeped from my shoulders and I realized I was exhausted.
“Mavis has contacts looking for a Maria. She’s the one that wanted you, so that’s our next step.”
“You could go, Owen. Your brother won’t keep looking for you.” I brushed some of the hair out of my eyes.
“You’re really throwing some mixed signals. One minute I’m hot, the next you’re trying to get rid of me.”
“I’m not joking. Your part in this is finished. There’s no reason to get dragged any further into this mess.” I needed him to understand. “I don’t want you to get hurt because of me again. I can’t—you can’t jump in front of all the bullets pointed in my direction. I’m not worth that.”
“We’re in this together.” He leaned forward. “You think you’re useless, but you aren’t. For the first time in a long time I don’t feel toxic. You do that. You make me feel human. And for that, you’re worth more than you’ll ever understand. You’re worth everything.”
My heart stopped. If I lived long enough to look back on this moment one day, I would swear that time stopped. His barriers were down, his eyes earnest. I couldn’t imagine how difficult it must’ve been for him to admit something like that.
“Owen…” I wanted to say something. But I didn’t know how to explain the feeling in my chest. If I didn’t know better I’d think I was having a heart attack, but I was sort of happy about it.
“Don’t say anything.” He shook his head. “I just wanted you to know that you are not useless. You are not worthless. Not to me.”
Again, I was left speechless and close to tears.
He stood up and I realized the room was dark. Where had the day gone?
“It’s late.” Well, that was lame. High-five Ava. Way to follow up his beautiful words with an obvious comment.
“You should get some sleep. Mavis is downstairs and I’ll take the room next to yours. Nothing will get past us.” He moved toward the door and ice snaked through my body.
“No.” I stood up. “Stay.”
He turned to look at me and I wondered if he could see my blush in the dark.
“I’ll sleep better if you’re in here with me.” I bit my lip and forced my breathing to stay even. “Like at the hotel. That was the best sleep I’ve gotten since I arrived in England.” At the time I’d been nervous, but I’d also felt safe. And when I woke up that morning I’d felt good. It had felt right. Normal.
Maybe normal wasn’t such a bad word.
I kicked off my shoes and undid the button on my jeans. Carefully I slipped them down and stepped free. Without looking at him I pulled the blanket back on the bed and climbed in. I lay on my side, facing the windows, and counted my breaths.
“Please.”
He didn’t move for five more breaths and I almost turned to check and see if he was still there. After a moment I heard the sound of fabric shifting and the mattress dipped under his weight. His arm snaked out and pulled me against him. He’d taken his shirt off and his skin was warm against mine. So maybe not just like at the hotel. I shifted so that my head was resting on his good shoulder.
“How’s your arm?”
“Good.” I liked the way his voice rumbled out of his chest. Carefully I slid my hand across his stomach. He covered my hand with his as if to show me it was working just fine.
“Thank you.”
“You don’t have to thank me, Ava. You never have to thank me.”
SOMETHING WAS BEEPING near my head. Owen shifted, reaching for something on the shelf above the bed.
Owen.
My eyes popped open like I’d been electrocuted. He slid back into the bed and molded to my back, his arm around my waist.
“Go back to sleep. It’s still early.” His whisper sent a thrill through my body.
“What time is it?” I was scared to move. I didn’t want him to pull away from me.
“Four thirty.” His voice sounded groggy and I smiled. Sounded like he’d gotten some good sleep too. “Old bugger must’ve been an early riser.”
“How’s your arm?”
“Stiff.” Hm. An honest answer. I’d have to remember to save my questions for early mornings.
“Do you want me to get you some ibuprofen?”
“No.” His arm tightened around my midsection. “I want you to stay where you are.”
“It’ll only take a minute.”
“I’m really okay.” He lifted his head so he could look down at me. “But thank you for offering.”
I let my eyes travel over his face. “Any time.”
His eyes dipped down to my mouth and I licked my lips. This was the second time I’d woken up in this man’s arms. There was no way I could let him go now without even a kiss.
I saw the doubt flash through his eyes, but I was ready for it this time.
I rolled over so that my body was flush with his and he had to look at me.
“Owen.”
“Yes?” Tension wove through his voice.
“Kiss me.”
His eyes flashed and I saw just a hint of his wild side peek through.
“You shouldn’t want me. I’m not—”
“Don’t you dare say you aren’t good enough for me. I get to make that decision.” I tilted my head and whispered, “And I decided that I want you.”
His lips were feverishly warm when they touched mine. He fell back on the bed and dragged me onto his chest, never breaking the kiss. I cupped his face, kissing him with everything I had and I never, ever, wanted to stop. His hands tangled in my hair before running over my back and making circles just above the edge of the cotton panties I’d bought in Oxford.
He bent one jean-clad knee up and I settled between
his legs. With one hand, he tilted my head up and ran his mouth down my neck before lightly dragging his teeth across my shoulder. I shivered and pressed closer. There was no way I’d ever be able to get enough of him. I ran one of my hands down to touch the warm skin of his chest, enjoying the way he seemed to shift so I could touch more of him.
When the hand on my lower back moved to cup my ass I sighed into his mouth. He shifted me so that I was pressed against the hard length straining through his jeans and I moved against him. The groan that escaped his mouth was an aphrodisiac. I sat up and pulled my shirt over my head, tossing it and my bra to the floor. Before I could lean back down to kiss him, he captured one of my breasts in his mouth. I let my head fall back while his tongue drew circles over my skin. My fingers fisted in his hair, holding him to me. When he raked me with his teeth I moaned loudly and had to bite my lip to stop.
His masculine chuckle filled the tiny room. “Is that what you like, Ava? Tell me again.”
He pulled away, swapping one breast for the other. This time he was a little more firm when his teeth touched my skin and I gasped.
“I…like…you.” I could barely get the words out. His hand had found the junction between my legs and my vision blurred. I wasn’t sure how much longer I’d be able to stay upright on my knees.
“Good.”
For a moment I felt like I was flying. My head touched the pillow just as his hands made quick work of my panties. I strained under him, wanting him to touch me again, but instead he pulled away.
I opened my eyes in time to see him outlined against the early morning light streaming through the curtains. The sound of his zipper was quickly followed by the whisper of his jeans hitting the floor. He set something on the shelf above the bed and then slid in beside me.
I turned to him, hungry. His hands slid over my bare skin, his callouses rough in a pleasant way. I wanted more. Needed his hands everywhere. I tried to get closer but he grunted.
“You’re going to have to be on top, love.” He ran his lips down my throat.
“Did I hurt you?” I froze.
“I’m fine.” He dipped his head down and lazily traced my nipple with his tongue. “I just don’t want to have to rush.”