by Amy Gutman
tion with life at large firms. “This is an extreme environment,”
6
Mills said. “It’s not for everyone.”
7
Finally, Kate found what she was looking for. The American Law 8
piece about Madeleine Waters’s partnership election. Kate 9
scanned the first few paragraphs and then copied down the cita-10
tion. After moving through a few more pieces, she found an Amer-11
ican Law profile of Mills written just after his elevation to managing 12
partner. Now that was definitely worth a look.
13
It took Kate about fifteen minutes to skim through everything of 14
interest. Picking up her notebooks and coat, Kate approached the 15
reference librarian. “Where do I find back issues of American Law? ”
16
“Syble.” Or that’s what it sounded like. Kate pictured an ancient 17
prophetess in flowing robes, clutching a Federal Reporter. But she 18
must have misunderstood.
19
“Excuse me?”
20
“Syble,” the librarian said again. “S-I-B-L. The Science, Indus-21
try, and Business Library. On Madison at Thirty-fourth.”
22
23
24
Entering the Science, Industry, and Business Library, Kate felt as if 25
she’d stumbled into some alternate world. Could this ultramodern 26
facility, replete with chrome, glass, and polished wood, really be a 27
public library?
28
Kate found her way downstairs, past a bank of televisions broad-29
casting business news, to the McGraw Information Services Desk, 30
where she was given a call number and dispatched to the B. Alt-31
man Delivery Desk across the room. Where the main library build-32
ing had broadcast its donors’ largesse by way of discreet plaques, 33
SIBL shouted its corporate benefactors’ names from every avail-34 sh
able surface. It took only a few minutes for Kate’s call number to 35 re
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flash on the marquee. She picked up a small square box containing 2
a microfilm roll.
3
There were just a few people in the Henry and Henrietta Quade 4
Microform Center. Kate had no trouble finding an empty micro-5
film reader. She managed to thread the film and then, after a little 6
more fiddling, managed to bring it into focus. The first issue on her 7
screen had a January date. The issue she needed was April. Turn-8
ing the knob to the right, she let the images fly by. Then she ad-9
justed the knob, slowing the film’s progression so she’d be able to 10
see when to stop. Only half paying attention, she watched the 11
pages drift past. Listings of big deals, with the names of lawyers set 12
out in boldface type. A gossipy article about morale at a Chicago 13
firm. A profile of a Silicon Valley deal maker.
14
And then, there it was.
15
The microfilm photo of Carter Mills looked weird and hyperex-16
posed. The whole report was only six pages, and Kate decided to 17
print it out. She stuck her new copy card into the appropriate slot, 18
centered the screen image, and pressed Copy. Five minutes later, 19
she was done. She rewound and boxed the microfilm, gathered up 20
her effects, and went back to the central room, where she dropped 21
off the box at the delivery desk and settled into a black mesh chair.
22
As she’d expected, the piece about Mills was filled with the pre-23
dictable accolades. From his ascent at the firm, the article moved 24
on to explore his family roots. A firm historian had compared Mills 25
favorably to his grandfather Silas, one of the firm’s two founding 26
partners. Martin Drescher had no comment for the record. The 27
one jarring note was a cryptic comment from Mills’s father. “I’m 28
sure he’ll make a success of this as he has of everything else,” James 29
Mills had told the reporter. “My son has never let anything, or 30
anyone, get in his way.” Perhaps the senior Mills hadn’t intended 31
the acid tone; maybe he’d only meant to say that Carter accom-32
plished what he set out to do. But something in the tenor of the 33
words told Kate that the two men had had their struggles.
ort 34
It suddenly occurred to Kate that she’d heard the name James reg 35
recently. At Charles Harrison’s apartment. He’d referred to Carter 9858_02_153-356_r6jm.qxd 9/28/00 3:59 PM Page 295
E Q U I V O C A L D E A T H
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by that name. At the time, she’d barely noticed, considered it a slip 1
of the tongue. Now she saw it was something more. J. Carter Mills.
2
It wasn’t too much of a leap to see that the J had to stand for James.
3
Carter must have been named for his father. He must have used 4
that name when he was younger, and Harrison had fallen back on 5
habit. But why had he made this change? Was it just to avoid con-6
fusion? Or had other factors come into play? It wasn’t a lot to go 7
on. But for the moment, it was all she had.
8
Half an hour later, Kate was seated at a computer terminal in 9
the Elizabeth and Felix Rohatyn Electronic Information Center, 10
signing on to Nexis again. She went first to the Legal News data-11
base and typed in a search: James w/2 Mills. Seven documents 12
came up. But, quickly browsing the files, she saw there was nothing 13
of interest. Two of the articles quoted a James R. Mills, a partner in 14
a Florida firm. The other five were equally inapposite, referring to 15
lawyers in Tennessee, California, and Michigan. Kate decided to try 16
a broader search. Broad but not too broad. She switched to New 17
York News.
18
She was almost through the results when a headline flashed be-19
fore her eyes. Unsolved Murders: Ten Crimes That Have Stumped the 20
NYPD. Kate stared at the screen for a moment before scrolling 21
down, past the headless body found in the East River, past the 22
execution-style slaying of a school teacher, to the item she was 23
looking for.
24
25
January 16, 1973.
26
A cold winter evening.
27
Maria Bernini, an attractive twenty-five-year-old with dreams of be-28
coming an actress, was returning to her Eleventh Avenue walk-up 29
shortly after 2 A.M. After completing a double shift at the Echo Diner, 30
where she’d worked as a waitress for the past three years, Bernini 31
stopped by a friend’s to pick up her sleeping four-year-old son.
32
It was the last time she was seen alive.
33
The next day, Bernini was discovered dead in her apartment, the vic-34 sh
tim of a brutal slaying. She’d been sexually assaulted and stabbed before 35 re
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being shot through the head. Her son, also
bound and gagged, was dis-2
covered unharmed, propped up in a chair across from his mother’s muti-3
lated body.
4
The Bernini case took a surprising twist when the gun used in the 5
killing, discovered at the scene of the crime, was traced to James Mills, 6
an independent historian from a prominent Boston family and a collec-7
tor of historic firearms. Mr. Mills, who was never charged in the case, 8
said he had not noticed the disappearance of the gun, an 1877 Colt 9
Lightning. . . .
10
11
Colt Lightning. Kate stared at the words, heart pounding. It was 12
the same gun. It had to be. The same gun used to kill Madeleine.
13
The gun Mills had used to kill himself. Even the modus operandi 14
was the same. Maria Bernini had been brutally stabbed and shot in 15
the head. Just like Madeleine Waters.
16
Kate closed her eyes, trying to stop her head from spinning.
17
1973. That’s when Maria Bernini had died. Carter Mills would 18
have been in his early twenties. Roughly the same age as the mur-19
dered young woman. The woman he must have killed.
20
“Miss? Are you almost finished?”
21
Kate looked up with a start. A bespectacled man was anxiously 22
waiting his turn.
23
“I’m finished now,” she said. “Just let me get my papers together.”
24
25
26
By the time she got home from the library, Kate had already made 27
up her mind. What she’d suspected about Carter Mills she couldn’t 28
just keep to herself. She would have liked to go directly to Detec-29
tive Valencia, but that wasn’t a viable option. She was still an em-30
ployee of Samson & Mills. And firm policy was crystal clear: first, 31
she had to go to Martin Drescher.
32
At loose ends, uncertain what to do next, Kate decided to type 33
up her notes. She sat down at her desk and turned on her com-ort 34
puter. As the screen flashed on, Kate felt her stomach drop. I have reg 35
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your law firm. She signed on to America Online. But there was 1
nothing unusual in her AOL mailbox. Just several more pieces of 2
junk mail. She deleted the entries and moved on.
3
From AOL, Kate switched over to the Samson network. She felt 4
a little uncomfortable putting her notes on the firm’s computer sys-5
tem, but Samson’s was the only word processing program she had 6
access to at home. She’d never had much faith in the firm’s com-7
puter security. How hard could it be to figure out that everyone’s 8
password was password? But she was just being paranoid. After all, 9
who was she? A lowly second-year associate. Anyone sniffing out 10
Samson secrets could surely find more interesting targets.
11
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Sunday, January 24
2
3
He couldn’t believe his eyes. By now, he’d read the sentences so 4
many times he’d lost count. He’d hoped to find another interpre-5
tation. Some sign that he’d misunderstood. But instead, it was just 6
growing worse. The ridiculous conjectures and speculations. Why 7
was she doing this? None of it made any sense.
8
He could feel a coldness deep in his core, gradually spreading 9
outward. From his stomach it had moved to his heart and liver, and 10
still it was edging on. Down toward his testicles. Up toward his 11
shoulders. From there it would flow through his arms to his hands, 12
now locked on the computer keyboard. But he was grateful for the 13
cold, grateful for the creeping numbness. It allowed him to think 14
clearly. Clearly and without emotion.
15
Again, the questions circled his mind, like vultures come in for 16
a kill. Could she really believe what she’d written? That Carter ort 17
Mills had killed Madeleine? That Carter had killed himself? But reg 18
she’d seen him leaving Carter’s office! What did she make of that?
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She was ruining everything, destroying his faith in her. Why 1
hadn’t she just asked? Didn’t she know he was waiting? Instead, 2
she’d gone off on her own. As if he played no role in her life. As if 3
he didn’t exist.
4
Something was terribly wrong. He gazed across the room, at the 5
photograph pinned to the wall. What should I do? he silently 6
pleaded. Where do I go from here? He stared at the picture, waiting.
7
The most beautiful woman in the world. And then the answer came 8
clear. Just as he’d hoped it would.
9
Kate Paine belonged to him.
10
It was time she acted that way.
11
12
13
14
15
16
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Monday, January 25
2
3
Kate awoke to the sound of sirens blasting just inches from her 4
head. Her mind demanded that she get up, but her body refused to 5
move. She lay for a time in stunned dismay, the noise assaulting 6
her ears. Then, as her mind engaged, she realized that she was in 7
bed. The screeching was just her alarm clock. She reached over 8
and turned it off.
9
Even after she’d gotten up, the grogginess seemed to linger.
10
Maybe breakfast would help. Why not take advantage of her flexi-11
ble schedule and make herself something to eat? There was noth-12
ing in the house, of course. So she put on her coat and went out.
13
There had been a light dusting of snow during the night, and 14
the short walk to Zabar’s refreshed her. Crowds already clogged the 15
aisles of the legendary food emporium. Carts and strollers vied for 16
position as shoppers grimly forged ahead. By the cheese counter, a ort 17
mother grabbed her sma
ll son by the arm. “If you don’t change your reg 18
attitude, I’m going to knock you down.” Nearby, a sleek male execu-9858_02_153-356_r6jm.qxd 9/28/00 3:59 PM Page 301
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3 0 1
tive type turned to his lookalike partner and said, “I want to be just 1
like him, stupid and a nymphomaniac.”
2
Kate was still mulling over this last remark — could nympho-3
maniacs be male as well as female? — when she reached the 4
smoked-fish counter. After a brief wait in line, she acquired a 5
packet of smoked salmon before heading to the dairy case. She was 6
moving toward the cash register when she had another thought.
7
She’d been meaning to buy a toaster. Why not take care of that 8
now? She made her way to the stairs that led to the second-floor 9
housewares department.
10
Upstairs, Kate was about to ask where the toasters were when 11
her eyes lit on a set of cookware enameled in a deep, rich blue. She 12
lingered in front of the display, studying a five-quart Dutch oven.
13
There was something both comforting and seductive about the 14
piece. It brought to mind dinners in front of a fireplace. Wine-rich 15
beef stews. Spaghetti Bolognese. Beneath the display, she found a 16
carton containing an identical item and heaved it into her arms.
17
Still carrying the Dutch oven, Kate proceeded to the toaster 18
aisle, where she picked out a white Braun model. She was tempted 19
to browse a little more, but she had about all she could carry. Be-20
sides, who knew what she’d end up with if she stuck around. A 21
bread-making machine? A waffle iron? She headed for the check-22
out line.
23
She didn’t have to go to work today. She didn’t have to do any-24
thing. But the thought of spending the day at home left her feeling 25
restless and bleak. If she went in to the office, at least she’d be 26
around people.
27
“You are a most unhelpful man. I bought this yesterday, and it’s 28
broken. Broken. I demand to see the manager. Do you hear me? Im-29
mediately. ”
30
The middle-aged man in front of her clutched a plastic blender 31
to his chest. The clerk at whom the anger was aimed stood there 32
looking frankly bored. It’s just a blender, Kate thought, annoyed. It 33
probably cost thirty bucks. Still, ten minutes later as she left the 34 sh
store, the scene lingered in her mind. Her sense of condescension 35 re
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