Soul Symmetry

by J. L. Weil

  “Uh, so if you’re a reaper, does that mean…” I knew where this was going. “…am I one too?”

  Now that had this burden off my chest, I took a seat on the edge of the bed beside him. “Here’s the deal, it’s a female thing. The banshee gene is passed to the firstborn who indefinitely happens to be a girl.”

  “But Zane is a—”

  “Death reaper,” I finished. “And not of our bloodline.”

  “The banshee or White Raven is an elite reaper,” Zane said. “She’s responsible for keeping the balance between the living and the dead.”

  “That’s such a crock of shit,” TJ swore at the injustice.

  “Tell me about it,” Parker grumbled. One of fifty manga t-shirts in his closet stretched across his lanky shoulders.

  I angled my head and shot him a you’re-not-helping look. “Being a reaper isn’t a walk in the park. And I’m not exactly doing a bang-up job of keeping the equilibrium between realms.” I reminded Parker. “People are dying because the veil that protects them from the dead is gone, and I’m entirely responsible.”

  Zane locked eyes with me. The dark veins had receded, and his shadows dissipated back into the hidden crevices in the room. “You’re being a little hard on yourself, princess. This battle started long before you became the White Raven. You just happen to take the reins in the middle of the stampede.”

  For a moment I’d forgotten that he was shirtless and barefoot. I repressed the urge to stare. “Nice analogy, Aristotle. Still doesn’t change the fact that all the sectors will hold me responsible. I ultimately have one job, and I managed to screw it up minutes after being inducted as the White Raven. Guinness World Record.”

  “But you have a plan, right?” TJ asked, suddenly onboard, ready for action, and looking to me for all the answers.

  That was my role. His big sister who fixed everything, not just the scraped knees or the spilled milk. I couldn’t disappoint him or let him see how scared I really was. “I’m working on it. But I don’t want you doing anything heroic or rash. I didn’t tell you this to put you in the middle, but to protect you. Make no mistake, if you get any half-baked ideas, you’ll be confined to these four walls.”

  No doubt about it. TJ wasn’t pleased, and knowing my little brother, he was going to be a nuisance. It was a good thing Parker was here. He’d just been assigned babysitting duties. And they were both getting security detail.

  “Hey Pipes, can we talk later?” Parker asked as I got up to leave.

  I glanced over my shoulder. “Sure thing. Should I be worried?”

  He shook his head. “Nah. I just want to run something by you.”

  I nodded.

  Chapter 9

  Zane wrapped an arm around my waist, pulling me beside him as we walked down the hall. “Do you feel better?”

  I laid my head on his shoulder. “You know I do.” Our soul connection tied our emotions.

  “You’re right. I do, but I wanted to hear you say that you did the right thing by telling him.” Of course, you broke another sacred reaper rule by doing so. And that is the reason why you’re going to make an exceptional Raven.” He ran his lips over the top of my head.

  We’d reached my door. I turned to face him, and stood on my tippy-toes to press a kiss on his lips. Seeing me with TJ had drudged up the fresh wounds of losing Zander. I wanted to erase the heavy pain of loss. “I’d been thinking about doing that for the last half-hour.”

  “Your self-control is admirable.” His hand moved to my hips as he backed me into the door. His eyes moved into the room and settled on the bed. I didn’t like the look that melded on his face, seriousness with a touch of sadness. “You know, this shouldn’t have happened.”

  He didn’t need to explain. We were talking about the most intimate and memorable moment of my life. “Are you saying it was a mistake?” There was a possibility I might put my fist into his gut, depending on his response.

  Zane reacted before I barely finished the question. He boxed me in. “Never. Not in a million years.” His eyes were bright as he spoke. “But the elders are going to do everything in their power to make sure you align your blood with a reaper heir.”

  The back of my head pressed into the wall. “I won’t let that happen.”

  “I know. After what transpired between us last night, I would eliminate anyone who tried to take you from me. I just want you prepared for what we have to go up against.”

  I frowned. “What do you mean eliminate?”

  He waggled his brows. “Do you want details?”

  I yawned right in his face. Talk about romantic, but then again, waking up screaming wasn’t the lovey-dovey morning after I’d envisioned. I ducked underneath his arm and strolled into my bedroom. “Zane, you can’t go killing each reaper the elders try to force me to marry.”

  He was on my heels. “Watch me.” He put a hand on my shoulder, turning me to face him. “I’m not going to lose you, and I won’t share you. You’re mine. You’ve been mine from the moment you stepped foot on the island. Probably before.”

  My breath caught. “No regrets.”

  The pad of his thumb outlined my jaw. “My only regret is that it didn’t happen sooner.”

  I smiled. “Me too.” Other couples have weird after morning moments. Zane and I, our whole existence was made up of awkwardness.

  Concerned colored his blue eyes. “You okay? I’m mean, after last night?”

  I nuzzled my head into the spot between his shoulder and chest that was perfectly made for me. “I’ve never felt better. Can we do it again?”

  He laughed, the deep sound rumbling under my ear. “Most definitely. I tend to have that affect. Once is never enough.”

  I cut him a bland look. “You might be magical in bed, but I’m not a two-bit floozy.”

  “I guess this means you’re a—”

  “If you say I’m a woman now, I will projectile vomit on you.”

  His lips twitched. “I could do this for the rest of my life.”

  I angled my head to the side. “What?”

  “This. The sweet and sarcasm. The back and forth. I’ll never get tired of you, princess, or what we have.”

  “Good,” I replied, for once without a witty comeback. “Because you’re stuck with me.” In this life and the next.

  With all this talk about us being together and the challenges we were up against with the elders, now might have been the opportune moment to tell him about Aspyn’s suggestion. However, I glanced up into his face, I couldn’t bring myself to do it. My hands flattened on his bare chest, his heart beating under my palm. I bite my lip. There was no way I could deceive Zane into getting me pregnant. Our relationship couldn’t be built on lies. He, of course, had been responsible. Sorry to say, Aspyn would not be happy to learn there was no chance I was pregnant. The idea gave me mixed feelings. I picked at his shirt, contemplating.

  He tilted his head down, a worry line spreading over his forehead. “Do you have something on your mind?”

  I chickened out. “Only how adorable you are.”

  “Touché.” His head dipped.

  I pressed a finger to his descending, edible lips. “Hold that thought. I’ve got to pee,” I announced and padded to the bathroom.

  Zane chuckled.

  ***

  Days came and went. The last week seemed to fit together like a stained glass window. A hundred different little pieces of colored glass much like my mood. All the ups and downs, the highs and the lows, but when you combined all those emotions, it created a picture. My crazy life.

  I had no appetite.

  Forget sleeping at night.

  And my anxiety was through the roof.

  Every time I closed my eyes, I saw death. The world was overrun by hallows, to the point there were more ghosts occupying Earth than the living. The dreams came every night, haunting me with the death of someone I loved. Parker, Aspyn, Zoe, TJ, but the worst were the dreams of Zane. His death would not only crush my heart, but
would shatter my soul in a million broken pieces. No one needed to tell me that if anything happened to Zane, my body, mind, and spirit would never be the same. I often wondered if I would be able to survive without him. My soul was intertwined with his in a bond that made us both stronger and weaker. And now that we’d gone public with our soul symmetry, my enemies knew where to hit me the hardest.

  I couldn’t shake the feeling these nightly nightmares were visions of what could be if I didn’t figure a way to restore the veil. And pronto. The time clock was ticking. Yet, I was no closer to figuring out the puzzle, and knowing that Zane was out there evening after evening, fighting hallows, made my blood run cold.

  I needed to do something. I needed answers. Before it was too late.

  I swept a coat of mascara over my lashes. Makeup was a minimal thing for me. I dabbed on some shiny lip-gloss and smacked my lips. The simple action got me thinking about kissing Zane, and so much more. Not even my wildest dreams came close to the feeling of being treasured by him.

  It was then, while I was doing the trivial human action that the idea came to me. Zane would absolutely despise the idea, and was precisely why I wasn’t going to tell him. He would undoubtedly try to stop me or change my mind. Neither was possible. Once I set my brainpower to a task, I could be as relentless as he was.

  There had been another attack tonight. Las Vegas this time, and after each one, my guilt mounted. I hated sitting here unable to do anything to stop it and feeling useless. And that ended today.

  I pressed my lips together, staring at myself in the mirror. Time to put my plan in motion, and the first order of business was finding an outfit. Swinging around in the stool, I padded over to the dresser to rummage through the drawers, looking for the perfect disguise for a spy. I was going undercover.

  Just as I pulled on a little black dress, a knock sounded on the door. My eyes darted around the room as if I just been caught red-handed robbing Starbucks for the last cup of coffee. A moment or two of silence went by before Parker called my name.

  “Pipes?”

  Exhaling, I jogged to the door. Oliver, my detail for the night, was outside in the hallway, and Parker was standing on the other side of the door, his hands shoved into his pockets. A sandy lock fell over the left side of his face, partially covering his eyes. His gaze lifted from the floor to meet mine. “Hey, you got a minute?”

  I glanced at the clock on the bedside table. Almost ten o’clock at night, prime reaper time, but Parker and I hadn’t seen much of each other lately. I couldn’t brush him off. “Sure,” I said, swinging the door all the way open.

  “Going out?” he asked, eyeing my unusual getup.

  “Uh, yeah, reaper stuff,” I replied, trying to make it sound boring and unimportant. It wasn’t a lie, but it wasn’t entirely the truth, something I’d always given Parker. It’s for his protection, I reasoned.

  He didn’t ask the usual where, when, and why questions, and seemed on edge, more so than was typical. Fiddling with his glasses, he said, “I want to ask you something. And before you get your panties in a wad, hear me out. That’s all I ask.”

  Great. Now he had me on edge. I sat on the end of the bed, tucking my feet underneath me. “Ooo-kay, what’s up?”

  “I’ve put a lot of thought into this, and it’s not just a whim.” He stuffed his hands back into his pockets as if he didn’t know what to do with them.

  “Good. I’m glad to hear you say that, I think. I wouldn’t want you making any rash decisions, but what are we talking about here?”

  “I’m not going back to Chicago,” he blurted.

  “You’re not?” It wasn’t the worst thing he could have said. For a second, I thought he was going to tell me something crazy. Like he wanted to be a reaper.

  “No,” he insisted, letting out a ragged breath and puffing out his chest.

  My brows pushed together in worry. “Why not? I don’t get it. Don’t you want to graduate high school?”

  “How can I possibly worry about a diploma when we don’t even know if Earth will still be standing,” he argued.

  That was a bit melodramatic and presumptuous. “Wow, Parks. Where’s your sense of faith in me. Are you telling me you don’t think I’ll be able to reestablish the barrier?” Truthfully, I didn’t blame him. Right now, my self-confidence had reached a new low, and just when I was starting to think I was tough shit.

  “No, of course I believe in you,” he retorted. “I’m just saying I can’t go on pretending the world isn’t plummeting down the crapper. I know you will find a way to fix it, but school just doesn’t seem as important as being here with you and doing anything I can to help.”

  I wanted to ask him just how he thought he could help me, but I curbed my wicked tongue before it got the best of me, and hurt Parker’s feelings in the process. He had only good intentions. “What are you suggesting then?” We needed to quit beating around the bush and get to the point.

  His foot scoffed over the hard wood floors, eyes avoiding mine. “Oh man, this is a lot harder than I imagined.”

  “Why do I get the feeling I’m not going to like where this is going?”

  He ran a hand through his hair. “Because you know me too well.”

  I held up a finger, and said, “Give me a minute to prepare myself.” Then I wiggled on the bed until I found a comfortable spot and crossed my legs. Oliver was in the hall shaking his head, trying to keep a straight face. “Okay, I’m ready. Lay it on me.”

  “No sharp objects?” Parker asked with a nervous laugh.

  I pinned him with the evil eyes.

  He exhaled and wiped his sweaty palms on his flannel pants. “Here goes nothing. I want you to turn me,” he bluntly stated.

  I stared at him dumbfounded. “Turn you into what?”

  He lifted both his brows. “I think it should be obvious. I want to be a like you—a reaper.”

  Oh hell no! “What the shit! Are you certifiably crazy?” At this point, I had jumped off the bed. “I’m not turning my best friend into a harbinger of death. How can you ask that of me?”

  “I’m not crazy. I’m being realistic. How long do you think I have before another hallow or a rogue reaper tries to gut me again? Being human makes me weak, and I don’t want to be weak, Piper. I want to help you.”

  “Does this have anything to do with Zoe? If it does, you do know you don’t have to become a reaper to date her?”

  He shook his head. “No. I mean, it would help, but no. She isn’t the primary reason. You are.”

  “Me? Parker, this isn’t a life I would choose for myself. You have a choice. You can live a normal life.”

  “Come on. Let’s be real. I’ve never been normal. I can’t explain it, but I feel like this is what I’m supposed to do.”

  “What about your mom?” I reminded him. “She is alone in the city. You’re just going to leave her behind? She’ll be so disappointed and hurt if you don’t go back.” Like me, Parker didn’t have a lot of family. His dad was out of the picture. Other than an aunt he never saw, it was only his mom and him. My family had always been his as well.

  “S-she’ll be okay,” he stammered, convincing himself more than me. “My mom is a tough cookie, and it’s not like I’ll never see her again, which might be the case if you don’t turn me.”

  I understood his need to survive and not always relying on someone else to protect you. I understood the need to do something and make a difference. I’d felt all of those things. But the difference was, I wasn’t human. And he was my best friend. He didn’t comprehend all the sacrifices, all the death. “I’m sorry. I can’t do it. I won’t do it.”

  “You’re being ridiculous. And selfish!” he said, raising his voice.

  “Me? I’m being ridiculous? That’s rich,” I snapped back. Parker had come up with some harebrained ideas in his days, but this took the cake. Parker…a reaper? The last thing I wanted to do was fight with him.

  “Whatever.” The crestfallen look that sprung on his
face made my heart sink. “You’re making a mistake.”

  My mouth dried. “Let’s hope not.” I glanced out the window. Night had fully descended. “I’ve got to go.” And before Parker could say another word, I grabbed my bag and was out the door. TJ was coming up the stairs. I brushed past him, our shoulders bumping.

  “What’s going on?” he asked, hearing all the commotion.

  “Nothing,” I replied, not stopping.

  “Where you going?” he asked as I rushed down the stairs.

  “Out!” I barked.

  Chapter 10

  The night was cool. I could already taste the end of summer. Soon the trees would turn from green and lush to vibrant color. But for now, the garden at the manor was still in full bloom, perfuming the air. Sticking to the shadows, which were a comfort more than a distress, I snuck off the grounds.

  I turned down the nearly empty street, a shortcut to Atmosphere. Heath, Crash’s father, owned the seedy club. He was on my hit list tonight.

  If anything shady was going on, and Heath or Crash was involved, Atmosphere would be the place to find answers.

  There was a slow roll of fog tumbling in over the island from shallow shores. With the brisk evening wind sneaking up under my hoodie, I heard the soft sound of footsteps. They paused briefly as I did, then picked up again when I creeped along the side of a building. The prickles of being followed radiated at the nape of my neck.

  Well, I had news for him; he wasn’t going to get the drop on me.