Have My Child: BWWM Romance (Brothers From Money Book 14)

by Shanade White

  Marnie’s approving sigh told him all he needed to know.

  The more she relaxed, Marnie was almost certain she could fall asleep right there on the spot. She hadn’t been pampered before, at least not like this. Her thoughts kept going back to how she had never imagined someone as good looking, kind, or from such a different walk of life than her own would ever see any value in her, considering how few men in her own neck of the woods had.

  Her train of thought was quickly broken when she felt Nathan lean forward and bring his lips close to her left ear.

  “I don’t think I’ve ever seen a more beautiful sight than you trusting me.”

  Marnie giggled at his words. “What do you mean?”

  “There’s been a lot of times I felt like you maybe didn’t trust me,” he explained. “Times where I could tell you might be inside your own mind about the past.”

  Marnie had no real answer to that. Although it was true, she knew there were times her thoughts weren’t on whether she trusted Nathan or not, but whether they were falling love or not. How would things turn out if they fell in love but the trust wasn’t there?

  “Well, I guess the biggest question is do we trust each other?” she mumbled.

  She felt Nathan’s hands pause, then Nathan let out a deep sigh. “I trust you, Marnie, maybe more than I should.” He laughed. “Do you trust me?”

  She thought about it for a moment. She did. She did truly trust Nathan. Rather than just tell him, she decided showing him was a much better move. She shimmied a little underneath him and he finally got the impression she wanted to reposition herself. It was obvious he was a bit confused seeing she hadn’t answered his question, but when he realized she was trying to turn over to face him without holding on to the robe to cover herself, he understood.

  Marnie looked up into Nathan’s eyes, and for a moment he just stared back. Then his eyes quickly glanced at her bare breasts, and back up gazing at her again. She smiled, and then slowly began moving her legs to slide them from underneath Nathan to around him one by one. He was more than happy to allow her to get more comfortable as a coy grin came across his lips.

  The robe still covered her lower half despite Nathan being between her legs. Her breasts were high, nipples erect and pointing upward. She could see in his eyes he wasn’t just admiring the view beneath him but the woman it was all attached to. He looked at her eyes again as if searching for approval or reassurance that it was okay, that all walls were removed between them. Marnie gave him another one of her sweet, soft smiles. She wanted him closer and no words were necessary to make that point clearer.

  Nathan watched as his own hand tentatively glided between Marnie’s breasts and right above her heart. She was almost certain he could feel it beating wildly beneath his fingers. His eyes met hers again as her chest rose and fell, her breathing steady but her lips parted in anticipation. All Marnie could think of was his hand gliding up to her neck and caressing her there, how he was being so soft, so observant of her reaction to his touch. His hand slowly made it's way back down her chest, his eyes following as if he were admiring a marble statue and its smoothness.

  He finally had made his way to her left breast and his fingers gently brushed across her taut nipple. The sudden sensation of his touch on that sensitive tip sent a rush of heat throughout Marnie. It was like flipping on a switch jettisoning electricity all over her skin. She let a small gasp and her breathing sped up.

  He grabbed her whole breast carefully in his right hand and massaged it. Marnie’s eyes slowly closed and her breathing became a deep close-mouthed moan. The next thing she felt was the rush of cool air across her stomach and thighs as Nathan removed the robe from across her; the only barrier between them. She looked up at his face and in the short moment, her eyes had been shut, his expression changed from one of fascination to utter desire.

  Nathan laid himself completely on her and kissed her with far more tenderness than she expected. His lips felt like they were discovering and navigating just a much as his hand had been. The thought of exploring her whole body with that much attention sent her desire to heights she’d never known. She’d never had anyone appreciate her, not even in the sexual sense.

  His tongue didn’t swish and flash back and forth with hers, it danced, tasted. His lips were feeling for hers as their hands worked together to remove Nathan’s pants. They were not rushing to this lovemaking, they were swimming toward it.

  The pants and his boxers were far down enough that Nathan leaned to the side and further remove them. He broke his kiss with her but only for a moment, then his lips eagerly returned as quickly as his hips did to their place between her thighs.

  They were now skin on skin completely, with the exception of his undershirt. She wanted no boundaries. None. She had built up so many emotional walls and if they were crashing down all others had to fall. That thought caused her to nearly snatch his undershirt up and over his head with so much ferocity it was in complete contrast with the rest of the movement.

  “I trust you, Nathan. I do.” She breathed against his lips between kisses. “I do.”

  Face-to-face, their eyes were all they could see. Marnie did not want to blink. She wanted that connection to be implicit and unshaken between them. Their eyes remained watching as she felt Nathan shift his weight forward and perfectly slide inside of her. He was hard as stone and she could tell he was taking the time to just feel that initial rush of feeling her. Their mouths touched but did not kiss. They breathed into one another, and Nathan rolled his hips forward finally letting his complete length crash into Marnie.

  Marnie’s eyelashes fluttered as she inhaled sharply. She could not have imagined how good he would feel. No fantasy she had did him justice. On her exhale, he moved his hips back then forward again. He was still taking his time but with an intensity and intention. It was then she knew he wanted their boundaries out of the way as much as she did. He wanted her to know him and feel him with as much depth physically as he had to give emotionally.

  He leaned down to her left ear letting his whole body rest carefully on hers, his chin above her shoulder. As she listened to his breathing, his hips kept the tempo like a dance. With every motion of him inside her and then away again, she felt herself falling deeper and deeper for him. She had been holding back so much for so long out of fear. She had played the role of the lone fox to protect herself from the next man that came along. But she wanted love, always. And tonight Nathan was giving it to her.

  She found her hips now rocking along with his. She had never felt so warm, so wet and throbbing with anyone. Even with others, she held back everything, but with Nathan, she was letting go, and she loved it. He paid attention and started to roll hips into her faster.

  Lifting his chest slightly and moving ‘til her eyes level with his chin, he was giving her the whole length of himself over and over again. He was no longer selfishly enjoying her for his own pleasure but making it crystal that he was all hers.

  His moans matched her own. They were vulnerable, unhinged sighs of delight, and Marnie couldn’t hold them back. Neither could Nathan. The throbbing and tightening around his hard, solid cock inside her sent her crashing into an orgasm. She was nearly in tears it felt so good, but he didn’t stop. He lifted his chest higher, hooking his right arm under left leg and leaning his body just slightly more left. He plunged deeper and harder, over and over. Marnie heard her own voice shout “yes.”

  His continuous moans in her ear at his own orgasm sent her spinning into her second one. The aching felt so good it was almost torturous. Her skin felt like the whole ocean had swept over her. Every cell seemed to scream aloud from every pore. When Nathan collapsed on her and released her leg from his grip, she finally realized she had a tear gliding down to her ear. What on Earth had she been doing all these years with lovers in the past? How much emotion had she held back in bed and outside of it?

  She felt Nathan deliver little wispy kisses on her left shoulder, then on her neck. He nuzzled
his nose there for a moment then let out one big huff of a breath. With her arms wrapped around him, she too let out a deep sigh. They laid there for a few more minutes, then Nathan must have realized he was probably pretty heavy and practically squishing her. He slid himself from between her thighs and carefully laid to her left in the bed.

  The sensation of her bare skin being exposed to the room caused her to get up and pull back the covers. Nathan followed suit. Once under covers, she felt him wrap his arm around her and spoon up close. She heard him inhale deeply. Maybe he was smelling her hair, or maybe he just was winded from the way they made love. Neither reason mattered as far as she was concerned. What mattered was they finally made that huge divide between them go away. It wasn’t the sex alone but what they brought to bed that night that would make the difference in where they went from there.

  Chapter 6

  It was two days after their night together. Nathan was on cloud nine. He honestly surprised himself with Marnie. He had spent so many years even in his marriage just holding back everything. Especially when Hilary started showing aggravation over his ideas concerning new business ventures or projects he found himself shutting down and shutting her out. He never realized how much that was taking place in the bedroom as well until he slept with Marnie.

  When he arrived back in Ocho Rios, he didn’t feel the same way he did when he had returned times before. Stepping back into his villa, the air felt foreign. It wasn’y so much that it felt unfamiliar but that he was sensing it differently.

  The air wasn’t comforting. The colors of all the high-priced furniture seemed dull. Even the sounds his shoes made as he made his way across the marble floor seemed to die out and fade.

  For the first time, he had an understanding of what Hilary must have felt. No amount of prestige or wealth can fill a home with love. For all its grandeur, his home by the sea now felt lackluster in comparison to Marnie’s home and even to the hotel suite, they shared a few nights ago. Love was missing. The warmth was missing. And it had all been missing long before Hilary left him.

  Nathan assessed his thoughts for how to fix what should have never been broken in his life and in his home. Sitting in his office, he listlessly answered emails, responded to inquiries about when he was returning stateside to meet with important investors; he did the everyday things his business choices had afforded to him do remotely. But all the while he was brainstorming ways to somehow incorporate more of what he felt with Marnie into his life.

  Then, it hit him. Everywhere he felt the glow of affection and connection Marnie was there.

  Even when they first met, he felt her at his side at the bar before he turned to see who was standing there. He wondered how she would feel if he asked her to move in with him. His own inner conflict was this would involve bringing her into the same lifestyle that drove his ex-wife away and he wasn’t sure if he wanted to risk it. But was Marnie like Hilary?

  The past two days he had noticed a bit of change in Marnie as would they would speak on the phone. He noticed she seemed in her own head again. This had always been a reoccurring pattern with her, but after their night in bed together, he was hoping that it would go away.

  He began pulling up pictures he had on his computer of the two of them together. Everything about it just seemed right the more he looked at their smiling faces pressed cheek to cheek, them holding hands as they shopped, or stealing a kiss that the paparazzi was more than eager to capture on film. That’s the one thing he could thank the media for. Through their eyes he was able to see what everyone else sees when they’re together, and what he was seeing was their happiness. Their love.

  *****

  It was not an easy thing for Marnie to do. She had grappled with it for days now. How could she tell Nathan she felt maybe they needed to slow down? She sat on the floor in her living room meditating to try and clear her thoughts. All she wanted was to fix the muddled up emotions swarming about in her head. Granted, those walls she had placed between her and love were utterly gone, but it opened her up to see so many things she had been ignoring.

  One would think she was over the moon to finally have the Universe show her what true love feels like, especially seeing how she had been praying for it for what seemed like her whole life. Instead, she was afraid. Horrified. The night she and Nathan shared was bliss, but also too good to be true. Overwhelming. No one had ever made her feel that way, ever. Far beyond making her heart skip a beat. Miles beyond giving her an amazing orgasm. No one had done for her what Nathan had and that was to let her just be herself.

  She had been sitting there in her meditative pose for nearly thirty minutes trying to rationalize her fears when her phone rang.

  She let out an aggravated grunt and got to her feet to go answer it. As soon as she picked it up off the kitchen counter, she saw Dominique’s name and her intuition kicked in. She knew her best friend was calling to tell her to snap out of it; to finally let go. But she couldn’t.

  For the first time in years, Marnie did something she hadn’t done to Dominique since college—not answer. She sat the phone back down on the kitchen counter and went back to place on the floor she had been sitting.

  When her phone stopped ringing, Marnie closed her eyes back and proceeded in what she felt was a useless task at this point.

  About an hour later, there came a knock at the door and Marnie asked who it was.

  “You know exactly who this is,” called Dominique.

  Marnie let her chin drop to her chest, then she rolled her eyes to the ceiling as she whispered, Oh shit. Rolling up onto all fours to standing, she walked over and opened the door.

  Dominique stood there, hands on hips and a frown plastered on her face. “What is wrong with you,” she demanded.

  “I don’t know, Dominique.” She wasn’t quite ready to have this conversation with her friend or anyone until she made sense of it herself. But here Dominique was walking into her house and shutting the front door behind her.

  “I have been feeling a funk coming from you without even looking at you or being in the same room with you for days now ever since your date with Nathan.”

  Marnie remained silent.

  Dominique's hands went from her hips to her crossing her arms. “So, what happened?’

  She realized Dominique wasn’t leaving until she gave her some kind of answer. It’s one of the things she both loved and hated about their years of friendship. She sat down on the couch and took a quick sip from her water bottle on the coffee table.

  “Our date was perfect,” Marnie sighed. “It was like a dream; everything I always wanted but never thought I’d have with anyone.”

  She could almost sense Dominique’s facial expression suddenly go from frustrated to utter confusion. “Ok,” she said, urging Marnie to continue.

  “But that’s what scares me so bad. It wasn’t just the beautiful hotel suite or the fancy food. Those things really weren’t what has me a little weary of going further with Nathan.”

  Marnie took a deep breath and looked up at the ceiling. It was one thing to keep all those fears in her head. Hearing own voice speak them aloud was a whole other thing entirely.

  “I’m so scared because I never saw him coming, Dominique.” She finally looked over at her friend whose face was more concerned than confused or angry. Dominique made her way to the couch and ushered Marnie to scoot over so she could sit.

  “Marnie,” she said. “I know that’s scary. I’ve only been there once in my life, and I regret I didn’t keep going down that road that could have meant everything later on.” She chuckled a little. “Do you remember Riley?”

  Riley Cook. Marnie hadn’t heard that name since right after she and Dominique graduated from high school. She instantly burst into laughter, leaning back on the couch and giving Dominique a stunned smile. “Riley!?”

  “Yes,” Dominique muttered. “Riley.”

  “You two were so cuuuuuuute,” Marnie teased.

  “Yeah, yeah, yeah. Remember when I
told you he had broken up with me right after graduation, but I said I didn’t know why?”

  “Yeah.” Marnie waited for the shock and awe that was sure to come from the treasured memory of her friend’s first love lost in the past.

  “Truth is…” Dominique took a long pause. “He asked me to marry him. And I said no.”

  Marnie sat up and looked at Dominique as if she had misheard her. “He asked you to marry him?” Even hearing it come out her own mouth didn’t make it any more believable. She remembered actually being a little jealous of Dominique and Riley’s relationship because he always catered to whatever she wanted and doted on her to everyone.

  Despite her envy, she would have been overjoyed to see the two of them walk down the aisle together.

  Dominique looked down at the floor just in front of the coffee table . “Yep. I said no because I knew I wanted to go to college and he was already working. He didn’t want to further his education.”

  Marnie rested her hand on her friend’s arm as she went on talking.

  “See, he felt like it wasn’t about me going to college. He supported that fully. But he felt like it was because I didn’t really want to be with him anymore.”

  “But that’s crazy,” exclaimed Marnie. “You adored Riley! That night you came crying to me I really just figured maybe he called your relationship off because you were going to college!”

  Dominique shook her head, then looked Marnie in the eyes. “I was afraid. I was afraid that I’d end up going to the university and meeting someone else. I thought to myself I didn’t want to break his heart if I got there and wasn’t on my best behavior.”

  Marnie thought back to their partying days in college. She remembered after Dominique’s break up, she watched her more well-mannered shy friend come out her shell. She was dating frequently and definitely having as much sex and more than even Marnie was.

  She really just figured it was Dominique’s way of coping with the end of a high school relationship. Looking back now, she had to wonder did Dominique do Riley a favor because she already planned on going wild in college, or was that just a result of the sudden end of their relationship?