On the Record

by K. A. Linde

  “But you just kissed?” Brady asked to clarify.

  “Yes. He told me that you and Erin broke up, and something in me snapped back into place. I realized what I should have known all along. You were it for me. Nothing else really mattered. I had to talk to you. I had to get you to see that this could be fixed. I wasn’t broken as long as I still had a sliver of hope. Which is how I ended up stealing Clay’s phone to call you. And now I guess we’re here.”

  “That’s a lot to take in,” Brady admitted.

  “It is. That’s why I wanted to talk to you in person. I never would have told Hayden in a million years if I had thought that he would write about it.”

  “Didn’t you even think to clarify with him that this wasn’t on the record?”

  Liz tucked her legs up underneath herself and sighed. “He was my boyfriend. We’d been together for almost a year and a half. I never thought that he would do that.”

  “Goddamn reporters.”

  Liz shrugged her shoulders helplessly. “I’ve never hated them more than in this moment.”

  Brady stood up and paced the room. She could see him trying to process everything she had told him. She knew he already believed her. It would be a pretty elaborate story for her to make up, and what would be the point in that? She was here. She was with him. She wasn’t about to start lying now.

  He pivoted and stared at her. He took in every aspect as his eyes roamed from her body clad in his baggy clothing up to her messy towel-dried hair to her face, open and vulnerable to him. With everything she was worth, she wished she knew what was going on inside of that head.

  “So, the real concern is where to go from here,” Brady said, his voice even and level. She could see the mask slipping into place, see the wall slamming down and closing her out.

  “Please don’t do that,” she whispered.

  “What?”

  “I’m right here. You can talk to me. You can tell me what you’re thinking,” Liz pleaded. “I’m not the public. I’m not the threat. I don’t want you to think that you have to hide.”

  “How do you do that?” he asked in disbelief.

  “Do what?”

  “See through me so easily. All I did was look at you and ask a question.”

  Liz slowly shook her head. “That’s not what I see when I look at you, Brady.” She brushed her hair off of her shoulder, moving it all to one side. “You’re not the campaign with me. You’re not a congressman with me. You’re just the man I fell for, and that man tried to shut me out once. I’m not letting it happen again.”

  Brady broke her gaze and let his eyes shift out the window. “I think there was a bit of mutual fault in that instance.”

  “Yeah. I guess we were both stupid.” Liz sighed. There was so much she wanted to know. She didn’t even know where to start . . . or where exactly they could go from here. “What was it like not having me at your side at all of those events?”

  “What does it matter?” he asked, glancing back up at her.

  “I was just curious. Like, was Erin all that great? Why were you with her to begin with? She was out there in public with you, on your arm. It seemed so wrong. And you just let her talk about all of that stuff at the dinner with your parents and I just had to sit there. I mean, a morning talk show host who does charity work with inner-city kids? Really? She must have given really great head, because she sure was boring . . .”

  “Are you about done?” Brady snapped.

  Liz eeped. “Um . . . yeah.”

  “Good. Now that that’s off of your chest, let’s try to put all of that behind us and think about what we’re doing right now. I can’t change anything that happened the past year, and I can’t change any of the circumstances we’re currently in. I can only think about the future.” As Brady messed with his hair, he walked back over and took a seat next to Liz. “I want to go public.”

  “What?” Liz gasped, standing abruptly and covering her mouth. She was sure that he hadn’t just said that. “I’m sorry. What did you say?”

  “Liz, I want to go to public. I’ve had over a year to think about what I would have done differently. I’ve missed you enough that I want to do this. I want to try to make it work. The public already knows you exist. Sure, it won’t be easy to be out there, but I’d rather it be our choice than the media’s. We didn’t go public before because I couldn’t see anything past my career. Well, now I want both. I should be able to have both.”

  Liz swallowed. She felt a bit faint. She never thought that she would have this conversation with Brady. Not in a million years. Every time she let herself think about being public with him, she had pushed the thought down and buried it. Now that she was faced with the possibility, she didn’t even know what that would look like.

  “Um, whoa. That’s . . . that’s kind of huge, Brady. I mean . . . Hayden and I just broke up. I just got the job offer at the New Yorker. I’m still in school, editor of the paper, and those articles. You’re up for reelection.”

  “Liz, I don’t care,” Brady said, standing with her. He grabbed her hands and pulled her closer. “I want to do this. All I hear is wasted time. You left. I get why you left, but I was stupid for letting it happen.”

  “I just . . . I want to, Brady, but . . .”

  “No,” he said, touching his fingers to her lips. “You want to.”

  She smiled up at him, but her stomach was in knots. This was exactly what she wanted and it scared the shit out of her. Everything had changed so fast.

  “I do, Brady. I want to be with you, but this is really sudden.”

  “I know. It’s kind of crazy,” he said. “I’m not normally a rash person. You really do fuck me up.”

  “I just . . . I know I was the one who wanted to go public last time, so I shouldn’t be hesitating about this, but it’s a lot to think about all at once.”

  Brady smiled and then bent down and kissed her on the lips. “I think I’d be more surprised if you were completely okay with everything. It’s a big decision. I’m used to the limelight. You’d have to be in it too, baby.”

  Liz froze. She hadn’t thought about that. Well, not really. She had always thought she was better behind a camera than in front of one. She preferred writing articles to working in broadcast. What would it be like to be out there with Brady?

  “Can we . . . can we wait to see if all of this blows over first? I just don’t want to be rash and put us out there, only to be under worse scrutiny.”

  “I’ll do it your way,” he said with another tender kiss, “as long as it means you’re mine.”

  “I always have been, Brady.”

  Chapter 28

  AROUND THE BLOCK

  Brady and Liz spent the rest of the weekend locked away at his lake house. Not wanting to risk being seen by any reporters who might wander by, they didn’t leave the house. But there were few objections from either of them about that. It was nice and peaceful compared to the hellfire they were walking back into when they left the lake. Neither was looking forward to it.

  The drive back to Chapel Hill seemed to take half as long as the drive to the lake house . . . and she had been asleep for most of the drive there. Liz chewed on her nails compulsively until Brady slapped at her hands and made her stop. She grabbed his hand, laced their fingers together, and leaned on his shoulder. She wasn’t ready for their weekend of tranquility to be over.

  “Brady,” she began as they turned off of I-40 toward her house.

  “Yeah, baby?”

  “I’m going to see you again, right?”

  His eyes left the road to look at her. “Of course. Why would you ask that?”

  “I don’t know,” Liz said. She really didn’t. Fears ate at her from every angle. She didn’t want to worry about how they were going to make this work, but she couldn’t keep those feelings from crowding in on her.

  “There are a lot of unknowns going forward, Liz. But I’ll always be your airplane, and you’ll always be mine.” Liz smiled at the referen
ce. She had said the same thing to him on the day of his primary. “You meant it then, and I mean it now.”

  “Okay. You’re right,” she said.

  She needed to trust Brady and trust what they had. They would let the storm blow over, and then come to terms with what they were going to do. Thrusting them into the spotlight and expecting everything to be all right sounded to her like a recipe for disaster.

  Reporters fed on stories like this. Liz hadn’t wanted to jeopardize Brady’s career before and she didn’t want to do it now. She knew he cared about her, and for now that was enough. They had been apart for a year and a half, so the last thing she wanted to do was be away from him again. However, she knew logically that it would be better for them to wait. Plus she probably needed the time away. After Hayden’s deception, jumping directly into a full-on, public relationship with Brady sounded drastic. Everything would work itself out with time.

  Brady turned down her street, and Liz’s head jerked at the sight in front of her. “Keep driving,” she barked.

  “What?” Brady asked.

  “Just keep driving. Don’t stop. Drive around the block.”

  “Okay,” he said, continuing to the end of the street and taking a left turn. “What’s going on?”

  “That Audi was Hayden’s.”

  Brady slammed on his brakes and they came to an abrupt halt. Liz jerked forward against her seat belt and grunted as it cut into her shoulder. “Jesus, Brady!”

  “Sorry. But what the fuck is he doing here? I thought you said you broke up.”

  “We did. Well, I mean, it’s over since he wrote that article,” Liz told him.

  “Wait, ‘it’s over’? Have you guys actually broken up?”

  “We’re not together. It hardly matters if I’ve spoken with him,” she told him fiercely. “He refused to take my call all day when the story broke. He had his fucking byline next to Calleigh Hollingsworth’s,” she spat the name. “To me that means we’re over.”

  “But you haven’t actually talked to him?” Brady asked. “And who the fuck is Calleigh Holling-whatever?”

  “Brady, how was I supposed to talk to him if he refused to take my call? I couldn’t. It’s over. He’s the asshole who wrote the story about us. It’s over.” Liz massaged her aching shoulder in frustration. She didn’t want to have to deal with this, not with everything else in her head. “And Calleigh is the other reporter who broke the story with him. They used to date and now they’re working together in Charlotte.”

  Brady’s grip on the steering wheel tightened and she saw him take incredible care to breathe evenly. “I can’t let you go in there. The guy is unstable and dangerous.”

  “He wouldn’t hurt me.”

  His head snapped to the side. “Are you serious?” he asked. “After what he did to you.”

  “It wasn’t like that. Not that.”

  “Well, whatever it was,” he said as if he didn’t believe for a second that it wasn’t exactly what he had said it was, “it was wrong. He’s already hurt you. I’ll be damned if I let him do it again. And what kind of guy takes a job with his ex-girlfriend? I’ll tell you. Someone who wants to fuck her while his girlfriend is hours away still in school.”

  “Brady,” she snapped, shaking her head. “I don’t want to think about that. Ugh! Hayden and Calleigh. I can’t.”

  “I’d put money on it.”

  “Can we just drive and not talk about that?” she asked. Brady eased down the road again slowly. He clearly wasn’t in any hurry to drop her off.

  “Can I take you somewhere safer?” he pleaded.

  “I’m safe at my house. I just . . . I need to talk to him, Brady. He’s there for a reason, and I need to let him know that it’s over. He has to already know, but wouldn’t you feel better if I told it to his face?”

  “Fine. You want to go in there, I’m going with you,” he said stubbornly.

  “Are you out of your mind?” Liz asked. “Did you forget that you’re a congressman and he’s the asshole who wrote the story about you? Do you want to give him ammunition to write about you? I certainly don’t! I thought we talked about letting the story blow over. I guarantee it won’t if you storm into my house and confront Hayden.”

  Brady ground his teeth together and didn’t say anything. She knew that she was right. She needed to confront Hayden about what had happened. Brady didn’t. He would only take a bad situation and make it worse. She didn’t want anything to get worse than it already was.

  “Will you just drop me off on the corner?” Liz asked, pointing up the street.

  “Liz,” he pleaded.

  “I’ll be okay, Brady. I’ll call you after he leaves,” she told him.

  He sighed heavily and then pulled over at the end of the street. “You have the right number now?”

  “Yeah,” she murmured, grabbing her purse off the floor. She found Clay’s phone in the bag and handed it to Brady. “Will you give this back to Clay? He’s probably wondering how he managed to lose it.”

  “I can’t wait to give it back to him,” Brady said with a devilish smile on his face.

  “Don’t be too hard on him, okay?”

  “I don’t make promises I can’t keep, baby,” he said, grasping her chin in his hand and kissing her hard on the mouth.

  “I know you don’t.”

  “Promise you’ll be safe?”

  Liz nodded softly. “Promise.”

  “Good.”

  They kissed again desperately, like a drowning person gasping for their last breath. Then Liz pulled away and exited the car.

  With a heavy heart, she clutched her purse to her chest and started walking down the street to her house. She hadn’t checked her phone yet and at this point she was kind of afraid to. Had Hayden called? Did he have some kind of explanation? Not that it would change her mind at this point.

  She slid her phone out into her palm. She checked her text messages and saw half a dozen from Victoria freaking out about her leaving with Clay and never returning, then another handful in all caps about Hayden showing up and asking what the hell she was supposed to tell him. Hayden had called and texted her even more than that. The messages started the morning after the article went live and ended only a couple minutes ago, when he had been trying to figure out where she was. She wished she had checked her phone so that she would have been more prepared for his appearance, but there was nothing she could do now.

  As she walked up the driveway and to the front door, she steeled herself for what was about to happen. At least Victoria was there. Liz might have been confident when sending Brady away, but she didn’t really want to be alone with Hayden. She didn’t think he would do anything, but she had no guarantees.

  Liz pushed the door open and walked into the living room, only to find Hayden and Victoria screaming at each other.

  “I don’t fucking care why you’re here, Lane, but she’s not fucking here. So get out of our fucking house, you douchebag. Haven’t you done enough damage? Just thought you’d come over to inflict more pain on my best friend?” Victoria threw in his face.

  “Vickie, just shut up,” he cried, spitting out her name as viciously as she had said his. “I’ve had enough of your shit. I don’t even want to talk to you. I’m here for Liz.”

  “Well, I’m right here,” Liz said softly.

  “Liz,” Hayden said, turning to face her.

  “You’re back,” Victoria said. Her eyes bugged, asking a million questions at once. Where were you? Did you sleep with that guy? Were you with him this whole time? What’s going on? Can I kick Hayden out?

  “I am.”

  “Where were you?” he asked.

  “Like you have a right to ask that!” Victoria yelled, slapping him on the back of the head and walking over to Liz. “You don’t have to talk to him, Liz. Just send him packing.”

  “I had a pretty traumatic Friday. I needed to escape. So I did,” Liz said, answering Hayden’s question. “What are you doing here?”

>   “I needed to talk to you, to explain,” he said.

  Now that she got a good look at him, she realized that he didn’t look like himself. He had stubble growing in on his jaw and his clothes were wrinkled, as if he hadn’t changed them recently. The only time she had seen him this disheveled was last October, when she had walked out on him after their argument.

  “I’m not sure what you needed to explain. I think I understand completely what happened,” Liz said, completely cool and resolute. Any apprehensions about coming in here had faded. She felt a dose of Brady’s confidence fueling this conversation.

  “Can we talk in private, please?” Hayden asked, glancing over at Victoria and then back.

  “Oh what? Like the last time we talked in private?” Liz asked harshly.

  Hayden winced. “I—”

  “Don’t have a good enough excuse for anything. And you never did.”

  Victoria smirked. “I feel like I need to go pop some popcorn for this.”

  “Victoria, really not helpful,” Liz said, shaking her head.

  “Fine. I’ll be in the kitchen. If I hear anything at all that is out of place, I will be in here to beat the shit out of you, Lane. Don’t think for a second that I’m lying.”

  He just stared at her with stone-cold eyes as she walked away. She left the kitchen door open, so there was no mistaking that she would be back in a matter of seconds.

  “What are you doing here? Just spit it out so we can get this over with.” Liz crossed her arms over her chest and waited.

  “I . . . I came to apologize for what I did.”

  Liz started laughing in his face. “Oh, you’re serious. How sad.”

  “What’s wrong with you, Liz? Why are you acting like this?” he asked.

  “Oh, I don’t know!” she said, raising her voice. “Maybe because when I confided in my boyfriend a secret I’d never told anyone but my best friend, he went and wrote about it in the newspaper so now the entire world knows!”

  “I didn’t put your name out there. No one else knows that it’s you.”

  “Right! Because that makes it better and suddenly absolves you from fault! Are you that stupid? Someone could figure it out, and even if they don’t, you still betrayed my trust in such a way that could never in a million years be repaired. How could I ever trust you again? You didn’t even have the decency to tell me you were doing it or fucking call me back that day to face what you had done!”