Riptide Love (

by Melissa Lopez

  Nathan was a Thorn. Only the little mate wasn’t M’s. He was his.

  “Well, we’re going to go play a few minutes while you two catch up.” Listening to the quiver in Denae’s voice, Ethan wanted to pull her into his arms and offer comfort. Neither she nor his mum would appreciate that.

  De carried Nate over to the couch and set him down. She quickly pulled out a few toys from her pack.

  “Thanks, De.”

  She offered a small smile in return.

  “Come on.” He wrapped his arm around his mum’s slim shoulders and urged her to go outside with him. “I’ve news to share with you.”

  “I’m getting old, Ethan.” A grimace slashed across his mum’s face as she sat in a wooden rocker. “I’ve a feeling I’m about to get older.” The smile she offered him was weak when she faced his way.

  “Mum, Nate’s mine. I can’t tell you how sorry I am over how things came about.” He straightened his spine. “But Nate is my son. And I’m damn proud to be his father.”

  She nodded. “I could tell he was a Thorn… Your father’s coloring…” She waved a hand. “Miller…he…” Her throat worked.

  “He’s not, Mum. Nate’s mine.”

  “Well.” A long sigh passed through her lips. “Everything worked out for the best then. Denae wasn’t right for Miller. I knew it. I never felt a spark between the two of them.” She shook her head. “Still, I tried to push them together. Thought they needed each other.”

  Ethan reached out and took her hand in his. He brought her hand to his mouth and placed a kiss on it. “Thank you, Mum.”

  “I wish I could do more than accept little Nate.” Sadness swamped her gaze. “Miller may need time to come around.”

  “Me too.” He chuckled. “Christ, me too.” He just hoped time would be enough.

  She leaned over and kissed his cheek. “I’m going to go inside and get to know my grandson.”

  A weight lifted as she walked by him.

  “Thanks, Mum.” He closed his eyes and turned his face up to the heavens. His mum had a good heart. That hadn’t been an easy task but at least it was done. And had gone better than even he’d expected.

  At the slam of the screen door, he jumped up. “Wait, Mum.” He followed her in to catch up to her. “We’ve not told Nate I’m his dad yet.”

  “Humph, well then, you’ve got about a minute to break the news because he’s going to know I’m his grandmum.” The set of her mouth meant she was serious.

  “De.” He called to get her attention.

  Green eyes lifted to meet his, but it was too late to tell her of his mum’s intentions.

  His mum got down onto the floor to sit across the coffee table from their son. “Nate, do you know what a grandmum is?”

  The little boy shook his head.

  De’s eyes widened. He willed her not to get angry with his mum. Surely, Nate wasn’t old enough to make all the connections.

  “Grandmums give presents and let their grandsons take a puppy home with them.”

  Nate’s grin was quick to spread from ear to ear. “I like grandmums.”

  They all laughed.

  Dinner had been quiet at his mum’s. Ethan kept checking his watch. If Miller followed his routine he’d be home any moment. Ten minutes passed before they heard the sound of a vehicle pulling up.

  De stood with him, but he encouraged her to stay put. This one, like the last, he had to handle alone. “I’ll be back in a few.” Impulsively, he leaned over and kissed her temple. “Thanks, luv. You’ve been great.”

  Mum’s watchful eyes followed him out.

  Big M climbed out of the truck as he approached. “Mate, good to see you.” A rare smile greeted Ethan along with a quick hug. Damn, his brother’s response to seeing him shook him up. He hated to steal that smile. Hated even more to give him the news.

  “Brother.” His hand clasped M’s shoulder. “It’s been too long.”

  “That’s a fact.” Miller took his hat off and wiped his brow. “Let me clean up, and we can get a beer.” His brother slapped him on the back as he passed by.

  “Wait.”

  “Eh?” M came to a standstill to wait for Ethan. “What can’t wait ten minutes?”

  Tightness settled in his chest. His heart thundered painfully. Christ. His brother was his best mate. “I’ve got something I need to say.” He forced a breath out.

  “I’m listening.”

  Where in bloody hell did he start? With Nate? In Sydney?

  “Little brother, it appears what’s eating you is going to take some time to get out.” M patted his back and headed off. “Come on. I need a pint. There’s plenty in the house. Talking always goes better with beer.”

  Oh, Christ. “Wait, M. Listen, first, you gotta know I’m sorry before I tell you…”

  M stopped once more. “Tell me what?”

  He shuddered on a breath. “You remember all those times you told me to think before I acted?”

  “Been telling you that since you were about four.” Miller nodded. “Think I took more than one licking for your dumb arse.”

  In his mind’s eye, Ethan reviewed the last licking his father had given Miller over him. Ethan had taken better care after that one. He’d climbed up into a tree. Christ, he’d done some stupid things as a kid. They’d gone fishing, and on the way back, he’d climbed an old tree to show off for Co.

  Miller had pleaded with him to come down before he got hurt. He hadn’t listened, only climbed higher instead. He’d fallen and broken his right leg. Miller had carried him home. Their father had beaten the living shit out of Miller for not taking better care of him. M hadn’t been able to walk right for four days.

  His stomach knotted.

  Oh fuck. If only he’d listened… No. Because if he had, he’d not have Nate.

  Nate was a fine little mate.

  “E, I’m still waiting.” Miller now stood by his truck. His arm folded over the side of the truck bed.

  “I’m sorry to do this to you. But I have to tell you something.”

  “So you’ve said.” M yanked his hat off and raked his hand through his hair before replacing it. “Still waiting on the what for.”

  “You know I slept with a lot of women, not caring about their pasts…” About them. De hadn’t remained among those women. He should’ve had the balls and told her so. Stood up to Miller. His shoulders slumped in remorse.

  “Did you go and get yourself a life sentence?” Miller straightened.

  “Hell no. I’m clean.” He shook his head. The one lesson he’d paid careful attention to was Big M’s talks on safe sex. Until that protection he’d used with De had failed. “Christ, mate, let me get through this… You have to know…I didn’t know who she was…”

  M arched an eyebrow.

  “Denae…”

  “I’ve been patient long enough.” M folded his arms across his chest. “Get this over with.”

  “Denae had a baby….”

  “She say it was mine? Because if she did, she’s lying.”

  “Christ, no. Miller, I have a son. I swear to Christ I didn’t know who she was…when…” He couldn’t breathe through the tightness. “I didn’t know she was your woman…I’d never have…”

  Again, he felt ten years old. Besides him mum, Miller was the only person he’d never wanted to let down. Or hurt. Shame washed through him. He trembled with it and guilt. If the situation had been reversed—he knew in his soul—Miller would have come to him. Big M was the better man. Had been the better man since they’d been boys.

  “I’m bloody sorry.”

  His older brother gazed off across the landscape. A rapid tic pulsed in his clenched jaw.

  As silent moments passed, Ethan’s heart hammered until he couldn’t take it any longer. “M, say something.” Or kick my bloody arse. Eh, he deserved a beating from his brother.

  “What the fuck do you want me to say?”

  His own teeth clenched as a clog worked its way up his throat. Oh,
Christ. “I’m bloody sorry, mate.”

  “A sorry and five dollars will buy you a bucket of piss.” Miller walked off, his back stiff.

  “M, I swear to Christ I didn’t know De was Denae. I swear.”

  Full on, Miller turned around. Anger radiated from him. “You bloody well knew what you’d done. You fucking knew when you sat at the pub with me… You had a dozen opportunities to speak up.” He knotted his fists. “I can get past the fact you fucked Denae. Life happens. I can forgive that. That’s what you want to hear, isn’t it?” Miller advanced.

  Ethan forced himself to stay put.

  “But, I cannot, will not…” M pressed two fingers into his chest. “…ever forget that it took over three bloody years for you to tell me what had happened.” Miller shuddered, alerting him to the fact he’d slipped from anger to fury.

  “Miller…” Alarm bells buzzed in his ears. He’d never said when he’d hooked up with De. Or how old Nate was.

  “And you, mate, better be bloody glad Travis called me and warned me what the fuck was coming.”

  Ethan groaned. Oh, Christ.

  “I’ve had the day to cool off.” His brother stepped away from him. “Otherwise. I’d probably have broken your bloody jaw.” Then he headed toward the house.

  Ethan had been dismissed. He’d rather face a great white than this. The brother he’d looked up to, admired beyond all others was shunning him. Christ knew he deserved it. Christ knew his brother was the better man. His breathing turned rough. Fuck! His chest heaved. He’d rather have M kick his arse. “Wait.” He had to warn Miller that De and Nate were inside.

  “What?” M glanced back, tight-lipped.

  “De and Nate, they’re inside with Mum.”

  “My problem isn’t with them.”

  With no other choice left to him, Ethan followed him. Inside, Miller stepped into the living room and removed his hat. “Denae, good to see you.”

  Ethan eyed the white knuckles M clasped his hat with.

  “G’day, Miller.” De’s lower lip trembled but she stilled it.

  “I hear I’m an uncle.”

  “Yes. Yes you are.” She offered up a weak smile. “This is Nathan. I call him Nate.” She kissed the back of her son’s head from where he sat in her lap. “Nate, say g’day to your uncle Miller.”

  “G’day.” Nate hid behind a storybook he held and peeked out from behind it.

  “You hungry, M?” Their mum pushed up from her chair she’d been sitting in.

  “Nope. I’ll eat something at Auntie’s. I figure they can use my room.” Replacing his hat, he tipped the brim. “I’ve got to grab a few things, then it’s all yours.”

  “Thank you, Miller.” De hugged Nate to her and watched him leave the room.

  His mum patted Ethan on the arm as she passed, heading to the kitchen.

  His throat worked. His shoulders had never been so heavy. He regarded the hallway his brother had walked down. If it hadn’t been for him. If he hadn’t screwed things up so completely…maybe just maybe everyone would be happy. Everyone but him.

  It felt as if someone had died. Never had he thought this breach between him and Miller would come to pass. What he wouldn’t give for one of their old man’s lickings instead.

  Swallowing, he looked over at where De sat with Nate. His son. There’d be no trade off. He hadn’t gained one relative to lose another. M had to forgive him. Mates remained mates.

  De lifted her head again to see the time. She groaned. The minutes crept by.

  Stay in bed. Do the smart thing and stay in bed.

  She couldn’t though. The evening had been spent agonizing over Ethan and his brother. God, Miller hadn’t even bothered to look Ethan’s way, while Ethan’s gaze had pleaded for forgiveness.

  Guilt had to be eating a hole in Ethan. She should know. The emotion had played havoc on her nerves for so, so long. There was no denying she’d played a role in the distance between the brothers. But at day’s end, she’d been relieved Nate’s identity was out. More importantly, Maree had appeared to be genuinely happy to have Nate around. Knowing he’d have one grandmother who’d take joy in him made her happy.

  Quietly, she eased out of the bed to leave Nate sleeping. After a quick check of the covers, she slipped out of the room.

  The house was silent as she tiptoed to the living room. There’d been no chance to speak to Ethan alone, and she wanted to check on him. Needed to was more like it. Disappointment had nagged her when neither Cohen nor any of his cousins dropped by.

  Ethan sat slumped on the couch with the telly on low. She hesitated. Maybe he didn’t want company. Didn’t need anyone to talk to. Maybe he wanted to be alone with his emotions.

  In the darkened room, light from the screen lit the blond in his hair. Her fingers twitched to play in the strands. To soothe away his hurt.

  Yes, she wanted to touch him once more. Caress his skin. Soothe away his pain.

  The memories they’d created had kept her going for so long. Now to have him back in her life. There was no possible way to understand how sometimes life just happened. She’d missed him so badly. The night he’d kissed her it’d taken everything in her not to tell him so.

  A quiver shook her knees. They’d have winded up on the floor if she had. She’d ached so badly to recapture the magic she’d felt with him.

  And the sex that they’d shared before had been so good.

  As if sensing her, he turned his head and straightened up. “He asleep?”

  “Conked out about an hour ago.”

  His arm slid along the top of the couch. “Couldn’t sleep?”

  “Not really.” She wrapped her arms around her middle. “Is the show any good?”

  His sigh traveled through her. “I hadn’t noticed.”

  She thought as much. Before she gave it too much consideration, she sat on the couch. Immediately, his fingers toyed in her hair. Pure desire quivered through her to settle in her breasts and lower stomach. “You okay?”

  “I am.”

  “I’m sorry, about…about everything.” As she remembered, his touch had a powerful effect. Helplessly, she leaned into his hand, seeking out his warmth, his energy.

  “No need to be, luv.” His fingers caught up the ends of her hair and rubbed them between his fingertips. The caress ran all the way down to her center. Arousal pulsed awake in her clit. His touch, his nearness never failed to enliven her senses. “None of this is your fault.” It wasn’t.

  Again he played with another lock of her hair as if it fascinated him. He buried his nose in her hair and groaned. “You smell good.” He inhaled. “I never forgot your scent.”

  She inhaled sharply at the feel of pleasure pooling. She’d not forgotten his either. So many nights had been spent wishing for him there. Her panties dampened. So many nights had been spent masturbating, pretending they were his fingers. His touch.

  It had been so, so long since she’d been caressed like this. Wanted. Even for a night. On another inhale, she caught the scent of the alcohol. “Have you been drinking, Ethan?”

  “Not nearly enough.” He made a rough sound of amusement. “I discovered it’s no fun to drink alone. Without a mate.”

  Easing away, she faced him. A shiver of delight ran through her body when he didn’t release her hair. In fact, he chased her movements by leaning in closer. Her breasts swelled, nipples extended in search of attention.

  “I…I…” Her breath quickened as liquid fire pooled low in her stomach. “I could talk to Miller.”

  “Luv, there’s no need.” He groaned, leaned his head back. But only for a moment. “I did M wrong. It’s as simple as that.”

  “I think he’ll come around.” Nervously, she patted the top of her shirt to make sure it was in place. “I owe him a lot.” God knew just how much. “He’s a nice bloke.”

  Another breath ran across her skin as he made a sound of amusement. Ethan shifted so they were face to face. “M’s a great mate. The best brother.”


  Chest deflated a little, she forced the returning guilt away. Life was about decisions. She paid for her past mistakes, but she refused to keep paying for them. What happened next would be up to Miller. She’d keep the faith he’d forgive Ethan. Them.

  His arm shifted to bring his hand to rest on her shoulder. His fingers tangled in her hair. “Nice isn’t the word most or anyone besides Mum would use to describe him.” His nostrils flared. “My guess is Cohen’s probably the nicest of us Thorns. The old man didn’t have the…” Abruptly, his mouth set in a tight line.

  “Didn’t have what?” Please don’t let him close up now. Admittedly, she wasn’t ready to open up about her past, still she ached to know everything he’d share.

  “You didn’t know M well, did you?”

  Although she didn’t want to disclose everything, she didn’t want to leave herself open for ridicule. At the stirring of the old memories, she blocked them out. Refused to face them again. Now wasn’t the time to open old wounds. She’d moved on. Bettered herself. So now with Ethan, she went for honesty. “I knew what he wanted me to know.”

  “I take that as a no.” Ethan dropped his head on the back of the couch.

  Unsure if she pushed him away or pulled him closer, Denae clutched at his shirt.

  “Our old man was a mean whacker. Mean as hell. Did you know that? Did my brother tell you that?” His breath warmed the skin on her neck.

  It’d never been quite so hard to breathe before. Miller had never spoken of his past. His childhood. Ethan had never mentioned their father in their two weeks together.

  “Dad was a vicious arse to everyone, Mum, me and Big M.” He rolled his head toward her.

  She gulped at the feel of his lips against her pulse. “But not Co. No. By the time dad turned on Co, Miller was big enough to get in the way. He took up for us all.” A shudder racked his body.

  “M never forgave our dad for all the beatings he took.” Under her hands, his body trembled. His voice grew taut. “He never forgave Mum for not leaving the old man…” His breath rushed hotly over her skin causing her own to burst in pants. Pure desire swirled in her core.