“Please tell me you have coffee for me,” she moaned.
“Not unless it’s hiding in the middle of my fist,” I threatened.
“Easy tiger. Who stole your stripes?” Angel readjusted her messy bun, and then waved at someone entering the studio. I turned to see Louis and Dane walk in. Great!
“Listen blondie. I don’t like to waste time or money, and right now you are doing both. That guy is going to end your session if you don’t get on the ball and do what he needs you to do. The next time I come to the studio and you’re hung over, I’m canceling our entire day. Got it?” I kept my voice low, but stern and by the way her eyes doubled in size, I think she got it. I left her in the booth to mull that over before her next take.
I waved at the guys, but made a beeline to the exit to get some air. I hated having to go there with her, and wondered if it would be possible to continue our friendship. That thought led my mind to Julian. Once I told him about Brazil, I wondered if there would be a friendship to continue. Dane joined me while I weighed my options.
“You may not know this, but I’m a great listener,” he offered.
“I’m sure you don’t want to hear this,” I warned.
“C’mon. Try me.” He sat down on the steps next to me. I took one look at him and noticed for the first time how kind his eyes were. Maybe he could be my first male friend recruit? To test my theory, I let him in on my dilemma on keeping it real. Dane was quiet at first, only shaking his head, but then he answered.
“Wow, that is a tough one. I think you’re doing the honorable thing, by being honest, but this situation is why most people lie. It’s gonna hurt, and you might lose your player card.”
I smacked his shoulder at the player card reference.
“I’m not trying to be a player! That’s the point of being honest,” I argued.
“Not a player, just a heartbreaker. You're going to decimate this guy if you tell him you're going on a honeymoon with your other boo. He can barely see you for more than a day at a time, but now you’re going off on vacay with the next dude? Not a good look.” Damn, he had a point. A good one too.
“You wanna know what I do with my sister when she has dating drama?” He leaned his elbows back onto the stairs, settling into a comfortable position.
“Please, do tell,” I was intrigued to hear his male POV.
“She went through a similar issue in college. Two dudes were both going hard to get at her. One was the guy she was dating, and the other was her ex. I asked her if she were to get pregnant for either guy, if she would be happy. When she thought about it that way, she realized that she was still in love with her ex. They are engaged now.”
“What! Are you serious?” I was thrown off guard by the pregnancy question.
“For real. Getting pregnant is a real life wake up call. It’s not a romantic notion, and it makes you take the situation more seriously,” he explained.
Hmmm,” I mumbled, as I evaluated his point.
“Then if you’re brave, you can ask each guy what they would do if you were pregnant. That shows you where his head is at, and if he is really serious or just in it for a fling. Trust me, I’m a guy, I’ve had a pregnancy scare from a girl I wasn’t serious about. I bought stock in Magnums after that!” He laughed at his own joke when I cringed.
“Um, that was a little more than I needed to know about you, buddy!” I did laugh at it, though. As off the wall as it was, I liked his honest approach to things. I already knew at least one man’s answer to that question.
My smartphone buzzed to remind me of my lunch date. I thanked Dane for his advice, and headed out to meet Lana.
When I arrived at Field of Greens, she was already waiting with two chicken caesar salads. I had a big breakfast, and told her I wanted to go light for lunch.
“Hey girlie,” she greeted me with a hug when I arrived at our table.
“Hey woman. What’s up?” I hung my handbag on my chair and sat down.
“More of the same. My boss is out of town and running me ragged on our latest project. How are you? Are you ready for your trip?”
“Oh, more than ready. I can’t wait to hit the beaches of Rio!” I dug into my salad, hungrier than I realized.
“I thought you would say ‘I can’t wait to see John’, but Rio is a sexy city so I’ll give you a pass.” We exchanged raised eyebrows before I commented.
“That’s a given, silly,” I cooed, sticking my tongue out at her.
“Ha Ha! You are so darned funny. So tell me about John. Is he as Dreamy as Jules?” She emphasized the word Jules as if she was practically drooling.
“John is a different kind of dreamy. He’s a little bit taller, stays in the gym and is like the sweetest man you could ever meet.” I tilted my head as I swooned over him.
“Wow! Jules was pretty damn sweet, so John must be like candy or maple syrup or something!”
We both laughed at her exaggeration.
“Yeah, he is now. When I first met Julian it was a totally different story. Let’s just say the first night we officially met he came right out and asked me to fuck him.” I laughed to myself remembering how fast I ran out of that club.
“Well? Did you?” Lana asked with her eyes bugging out.
“No! Girl, I ran. Do not pass go, do not collect two hundred dollars! I didn’t even tell my cousin that I was leaving.”
“But eventually… ya did!” She joked.
“Yes. He was too smokin hot to resist. The first time was in the ladies room at his club. I felt like his hands literally melted away all my inhibitions. Everything was so fast a furious with him, like he knew right away that he wanted to be with me.”
“Damn, he is smokin hot. I can’t see very many women telling him no. Shit, I know a few men who would love a swing at bat.”
“Shut up!” I cried, laughing out loud in the quiet restaurant.
“So seriously. What happened?”
I told her the whole dramatic story of our history. Lana was glued to my every word and then stunned speechless when I was done.
“Crazy, right?”I confirmed her shock.
“Unbelievable. Wow. So now you go to Brazil with John and see if what you have with him can be salvaged, or if it’s stronger than what you have with Julian.”
“What do you mean?” I wanted her to clarify why she thought what I had with Julian held weight.
“I saw you guys together, and your face when he surprised you. The way he looks at you when you’re not looking. I can’t imagine anything competing with that. But, I haven’t met John so who knows. You may just be the luckiest bitch I know.”
“You should come to New York for the grand reopening of the boutique my cousin runs. All her events are on point, and it would be good for your event planning business. Get some networking in, and meet some new people.” I put on my best salesperson act to convince her.
“If I can meet a man like the men you’re juggling, I’m in.” She replied.
“Ha! I can’t make any promises, but Drew will be there,” I teased. Lana just cut her eyes at me, and I cut mine right back.
Ch 14 In Full Effect
Being in Miami was having such a positive effect on me, that I decided to stay until my trip with John. There was no point going back to New York for a couple of weeks. I was able to get loads of work done here, and I was having fun. Donna wasn’t in a rush to get back home either. Her and Alex were on talking terms, but she was still too hurt to face him yet. I had to beg, but was able to get approval from the office to let her ‘work from home’. It made sense, since I wasn’t there for her to support, and it was easier for us to be in the same place. Working with Angel and stepping in as her manager had enabled me to rent out a small office for us to work out of. Her previous manager, Dylan, dropped her out of the blue. My intuition told me their relationship was more than professional and it was funny how this coincided with the rumors about Angel and Louis. So for now, the Sunshine state was my home, again. The only cloud i
n my sky was from the past.
I was just finishing up a pseudo shopping spree at the Bal Harbor Mall, when I came face to face with colleen. It’s seems that our mutual affinity for MAC cosmetics hadn’t changed. I spotted her first, as I was walking out. She was strolling towards the store entrance, while rummaging through her purse. I felt my entire body tense, and it felt like fire was dancing underneath my skin. My initial instinct was to tackle her to the ground. For a split second I thought about ducking her before she saw me, but I’m glad I didn’t. The shameful look on her face when she recognized me was priceless! Stupid Slore!
We stood there, awkwardly appraising each other. I could tell she was surprised to see how thin I was, having lost another fifteen pounds due to stress. Everyone said it looked good on me, so I decided to embrace it and show off my new body. Today I was wearing a denim romper under a green peplum jacket with tan ankle boots. It was another outfit from Jackie that I balked at, but worked once I put it on. Colleen looked the same. Skin tight business suit, shoulder length layered bob, and stilettos. That was her everyday work attire, and I now wondered if she used her Sharon Stone look for more than style purposes. I couldn’t believe this stranger was the woman who I used to call my best friend. I envisioned her and Evan together and had to grip my bags to keep from slapping the shit out of her.
“Jade,” colleen muttered after it was clear to her that I wasn’t going to initiate a conversation. She seemed nervous, and kept looking around like she was afraid of what I might do to her. I laughed inwardly at how dumb she was. You slept with my ex, but don’t even have the balls to face me...
I didn’t verbally reply to her, just nodded my head to acknowledge that she had addressed me. I couldn’t say her name. It would have felt like sand rolling off my tongue. Honestly, I didn’t know what to say to her. I just wanted her to see me, to see her reaction. I didn’t need any closure from her because if I was honest, I always knew that she was capable of this. I knew her history of sleeping around, but thought I was immune. I guess you gotta let a hoe be a hoe...
Bored with the situation, I made a move to brush past her, but she stopped me before I walked away.
“Cc-can we talk?” She was right to stutter her words, because she had no right to ask me that. She hadn’t called me to explain or apologize before.
“I really don’t see what we have to talk about,” I replied in a bored tone.
“I just thought... Maybe...It’s just that seeing you...” She kept stammering and I was growing increasingly annoyed. Ms. Sophisticated Lawyer couldn’t even formulate a complete sentence.
“What? Seeing me reminded me that you were supposed to be my friend?”
“I was... I’m sorry. I messed up and I didn’t know how to fix it,” she tried to explain.
“You know what? We all make mistakes, some can be fixed and some can’t. You didn’t even try!” At least Evan attempted to explain himself. Colleen never even called me. Like she was waiting for me to reach out to her. When I saw that she still had nothing to say for herself, I continued.
“Look, let me make this easy for you. You no longer matter to me. You’re not part of my life, and never will be again. I let you go the day I found out what a backstabbing slut you really could be, no offense. Take care of yourself.”
I turned and walked away, forcing myself not to look back. She deserved this, she stabbed me in the back so I shouldn’t care how she felt. I didn’t need to see her sad, because unlike her, that wouldn’t have felt good to me. It did feel good to get that off of my chest. I’d never called anyone a slut to their face before and it felt kinda awesome.
Seeing Colleen ruined my appetite to shop, so I headed home. Despite my earlier inclination to get my own place, I had to admit that I liked the comfort of being near my brother. It also came in handy on days like this one, when I needed to vent to Drew. Wanting my own spot was part of my tendency to hide out, and I needed to be around people. Be it a little cramped for three of us, it worked. Donna spent most of her free time reading and hanging out at the beach. She also reconnected with a cousin that lived in Fort Lauderdale, and she would spend some weekends there. Drew was busy with football and his upcoming finals. If he wasn’t at practice or studying, he was asleep.
I had Angel and Lana to keep me busy. Angel got her butt in gear, and even apologized for her behavior. She admitted that it scared her to think that her actions might ruin our friendship. Lana was a busy body, and always had ‘something’ for us to do. Spa days, networking events, and girls night out were her specialty. I also suspected that another reason for her constant presence was to be near to Drew. I noticed the little glances and smiles they exchanged when they thought no one was looking. They would make a cute couple once they quit trying to hide whatever was going on. All in all, things were good. It felt good to have people around me who understood me, and didn’t bring drama into my life. I had enough drama of my own.
It was the beginning of November and my trip to Brazil was just a week away. Whatever John was working on in California had him pretty busy. I was disappointed that he wasn’t able to visit me in Miami, but felt it worked out since Julian had come to see me. I was still struggling with how to handle that situation. Even though I hadn’t seen Julian in a month, we talked often enough. He couldn’t tell me exactly where he was, but I knew that he was working with a family member. He was also stressed out about not being able to manage his own businesses. Edward had stepped in for him, so I could understand his concern. Just the thought of Edward made me cringe. I couldn’t fathom how Jackie was still dating him. A brief memory of my aunt’s story made me wonder if my cousin was now in a similar situation. Well I had my own worries, like how to tell Julian that I was going on a trip with John. I decided to just do it and get it over with. Big girl panties on deck!
After dinner, I took my bat-phone and headed for the patio. I sat there for a while trying to build up my nerve. This wasn’t going to be easy, and knowing Julian, it was going to be intense. Pressing the call button, I closed my eyes and waited for him to answer.
“Jade, my love,” he uttered in a sexy drawl. The pit of my stomach filled with lead.
“Hey,” was all I could manage. I was beginning to reconsider my decision. No, don’t be a baby!
“What’s wrong?” He asked, hearing the tension in my voice. I swallowed hard before I spoke.
“Nothings wrong. I just... I need to talk to you about something.” Fear swirled around like a tornado in my chest.
“Did something happen? What is it? Tell me.” His concern stabbed at my conscience, making me feel like a shmuck. My palms began to sweat, and I felt like I was on the verge of fainting. I sat forward, dropping my head between my legs. Ugh! Good thing he can’t see me!
“It’s nothing bad. Well, it’s just that I wanted to let you know that I’m going away next week.”
“Oh? For work? Where to?” He questioned, seeming relieved that I didn’t have bad news. Not Yet...
“Um. I’m going to Brazil, but it’s not for work,” I clarified.
“Brazil? Is this a girls trip?” The skepticism in his tone was undeniable. I couldn’t drag this out anymore. I should have just been straight up.
“I’m going to Brazil with John. For his birthday,” I confessed. I held my breath, waiting for his response.
“You're going to Brazil with John,” he repeated.
“Yes.”
“For his birthday?” His voice was void of any inflection.
“Yes,” I confirmed. I closed my eyes as I braced myself for an outburst.
“Ok,” he replied.
“Ok?”
“Yep.”
“That’s all you have to say?” I was stunned at his calm response.
“Is there something that you would like to hear?” Sarcastic Julian in full effect.
“Um, no. I though-”
“Ok, well I’m gonna get some rest. I’ve had a long day. Goodnight.” Then dead silence. I checked my
screen to confirm that he had indeed, hung up on me. I stared at my phone for a moment, almost hoping that it was an accident and that he would call back. The part of my brain where my common sense resided, rolled its eyes. Right on cue, Drew came out to join me.
“What’s wrong with you?” He sat down on the lounge chair next to the one I was perched on.
“I just told Julian I was going to Brazil.”
“Whoa! You told him? Did you tell him about John?” Drew’s tone almost matched Julian’s when I told him I was going to Brazil.
“Yep. I told him.” I leaned back into my chair, my shock slowly wearing off.
“And? What did he say?”
“Nothing really. He hung up on me.” I’m sure there was a pout on my face to match my reply.
“Huh,” Drew half chuckled.
“Huh? That’s it?” I couldn’t handle another cut off conversation.
“I mean, damn Jade. What else can he say? You cut off his balls, and then want him to talk about it? Really? What could he say besides angry words that would probably hurt you worse than you just hurt him?”
I hate it that my brother is always right. I hate it that he always keeps it real with me, but it’s also why I love him so much.
“I know. I guess I’m so used to him being hot headed.”
“You’re used to him wearing his heart on his sleeve for you to ignore. That’s what you're used to.”
I just looked at Drew and sighed. There was really nothing I could say. As much as the whole situation sucked, I did what needed to be done.
“I’m proud of you, though,” Drew said as he play punched my arm.
“Oh yeah? For what?”
“I know that was hard, but you did it. Live your life on your terms Jade. It’s yours. No one else can live it besides you.” Another gem from Drew’s book of wisdom.
Only Her Heart (The Jaded Hearts Club) Page 12