“Oh,” I half moaned, half whispered feeling the sensations shooting down to my toes.
“I disagree,” John teased me with his voice, as his fingers continued to tease me. His left hand relinquished my now engorged breast and slid back down my torso, sliding just one finger into my panties. I bit my lip to keep from making a noise that would indicate just how bad I wanted what he was doing to me.
“Hmm, are you still unsure?” His finger was tracing gentle circles just at the entrance of my heat. My thighs pressed together involuntarily at the urgent need to have his finger where I needed it. Still playing the game, he adjusted to my movements, keeping his finger just slightly out of range.
“Nope, tell me you're ready,” he demanded hoarsely. His own desire was pressing into me. Mustering up some control, I grabbed his hand, pulling it away from my body as I spun around to face him. We stared at each other, both of our eyes filled with desire and need, amongst all the other feelings that were hovering between us.
“Are you sure about what you want?” I pushed past him, taking his moment of shock to make my move. I really had no desire for anyone to see more than the show they already had. I was walking back into the hotel room, headed towards the mini bar when I was swooped up into the air. John held me, my back to his chest, suspended in the air. He swept everything on the bar to the left, causing the ice bucket to go flying, and the ten dollar hotel water tumbling to the ground. Then he turned me around, sitting me on top of the bar while he leaned against it, pushing me into the wall with his body. His eyes were fierce, and piercing into me with the challenge of telling him no again. Feeling uncharacteristically feisty, and not understanding what had come over me, I slapped him. I slapped John. His response was just as shocking. He laughed. A loud, almost sinister laugh.
“Was that another no? Well fuck that,” he growled. He shoved one hand into my hair, gently pulling me towards him. I didn’t resist when he kissed me roughly. I kissed him back with just as much fire. Raw heat pulsed between my legs, I was so turned on. Gripping my hips, John pulled my body even closer to his. I had to wrap my arms around his neck just to keep my balance. We continued to attack each other’s lips with hot, forceful kisses. In another fit of aggression, I bit down on his lip and was rewarded with a snarl. In an instant my panties were torn away, and John was positioning himself right against me while he pulled on a condom. Letting go of my hair, he raked his hand down my body, pulling away my bra. I cried out a loud, animalistic moan when his teeth grazed my nipples. First one then the other. I cried out again when he thrust into me. We locked eyes, both registering the intensity of the moment. John’s gaze was stoic as he thrust into me with hard even pumps. I tried to hold his gaze, but I was too close to coming undone. I pushed my head against him, opening my mouth against his shoulder and sinking my teeth into his skin. John grunted loudly, tightening his grip on my hips and increasing the velocity of his thrust. Resting his mouth against my ear, I bristled at the sound of his heavy breathing. When he began to whisper all the dirty things he wanted to do to me, and was going to do to me, I fell apart.
“Oh! Fuck!” was all I could articulate when the world came crashing in all around me.
“Yeah! That’s it! Fuck!” John yelled as he exploded inside of me.
We remained there for a while, me slumped against the wall and John slumped against me, gently kissing my neck. Then he finally composed himself and held me to him, taking us both to the shower where we reenacted a more subdued version of what we just performed. Making the most of the last night in Brazil. Indeed!.
Morning came crashing into my room, an unwelcome intruder. Forcing me to open my eyes, and waking my mind up. I didn’t want to consider the magnitude of the previous nights events. I didn’t even know how to process our encounter. We were both simmering with emotions that neither one of us were talking about, and last night it all came to a head. Was I crazy to be saddened by a night of exhilarating sex? No, because with John, that meant he was either angry or brooding about something. Just like flower-gate.
Rolling over, I came face to face with John. He was already awake, just watching me. His eyes told me a sad story causing my melancholy to increase. This wasn’t how things were supposed to be between us. We spent the last three days pretending; faking contentment while we both held our thoughts and concerns from each other, because we were unsure what they meant. I know I was. I didn’t feel that underlying connection that we had before, and I was terrified that it might be gone forever. How do you say that? When reality strikes, it holds nothing back.
Following our theme, we continued to share a silent communication. I could feel the unwelcome lump forming in my throat when John began to stroke my cheek. He looked concerned, almost remorseful, when he leaned in to kiss me. I understood the urgency of his kiss, and welcomed the gentleness of his touch. Talk to me! Say something! My mind shouted these words to a deaf audience. Making up superseded talking, and our last breakfast before we returned home.
Ch 18 You don't want that
Returning to New York alone sucked. Plain and simple. John had to return to California for a short trip, but promised he would be home in time for Jackie’s party this weekend. It didn’t make any sense to fly to Miami for a few days, just to turn around and get on another plane here. Donna was flying up the next day, and Drew and the girls would be here the night before the party. I also wasn’t prepared for for the cool temperatures that I returned too. I had been spoiled with only having experienced the spring/summer climate of New York, and when I left it was still at least warm enough that I didn’t need a heavy coat. The end of November was the coldest weather of my life, and I shivered at the thought that winter wasn’t even in full effect, yet.
My apartment was a site for sore eyes. I missed my loft and I missed having my own space. I loved my brother and my girls, but sometimes I needed some silence. Ok, a lot of times. I searched around for the control to my thermostat. Jackie had been stopping by to check on the place, and was kind enough to set the heat for me, but it was a tad too warm. Shit! It was hot as hell and I went from shivering to sweating in a matter of minutes.
After locating my temperature controls in the kitchen, I warmed up the soup I grabbed on the way home, took a warm shower, and then opened my laptop to check my calendar. I had a few days to get some work done, and I wanted to touch base with as many of my clients as I could. To date, Donna had been doing most of the work on La Carra, being my middle man and dealing with Edward. Angel was also coming up for some business with her label and I planned on a face to face with her absent manager. Hector Delgado had also requested my assistance on a new business venture and suggested that this time I take coming to Peru seriously. With my current bi-city status, maybe a trip to Peru would help kill some time until Ryan felt it was safe enough for me to move back permanently. That reminded me to call Ryan and let him know that I was back in the city. He answered the phone on the first ring.
“Hey stranger. How’s Miami treating you?” His voice was so smooth and cheerful it made me laugh.
“Miami was fabulous, but I was calling to tell you that I’m back in New York for a while.”
“Wow. Ok, Miss Austin Powers. I’m glad you called. I was going to email you, but if you have time, can you come down to the station? I wanna show you something.”
I was glad he couldn’t see me because I flushed red hot at his last sentence, remembering what happened on the boat with Julian.
“Yeah, sure. I can come down tomorrow morning.”
“OK, cool. See you then.”
I pulled out my bat phone and called Julian. I hadn’t spoken to him since I told him about Brazil, and he kept crossing my mind. The phone didn’t ring, just gave me a fast busy from the other line. I frowned and tried again with the same results. That was weird. No voicemail, no ring, just that damn busy tone. I sat back on the couch in my state of confusion. What the heck was going on now?
I called Drew to complain.
“What’s up baby girl,” my brother chimed.
“Hey,” I grumbled.
“What’s wrong?”
“I can’t get through to Julian. His phone doesn’t even pick up, it just does this weird busy signal.” I slumped down, into my couch.
“Well I’m sure he’ll call. Maybe he lost or broke his phone. Don’t worry.”
Don’t worry. Too late for that.
The next morning I bundled up in my new winter gear provided by Jackie. Having a stylist as a cousin was not a bad deal at all. She would pick out things in the styles I liked and have them sent over along with a bill. The heather grey pea coat that she picked out was one of my favorite purchases. I wrapped a thin burnt orange scarf around my neck and made my way uptown.
The precinct that Ryan worked out of was no more inviting than it had been on my first visit. This time, I went directly to the clerk and asked to see Detective Walsh. I sat in the four chair waiting area, sipping on a coffee until he came strolling out. I felt like a peeping tom as I studied him during his entire conversation with a uniformed officer. He must have felt my eyes on him, because he glanced up at me and winked, motioning for me to approach him. Must run in the family.
I followed him into his office and took a seat while he closed the door and pulled out a file.
“Whoa! Someone got some sun. It looks good on you.”
“Thank you,” I replied as I blushed at his compliment.
“No really. You look almost like a different person than the last time I saw you. More vibrant. What have you been up to down in Miami?” He kept looking at me like he was trying to find more things that were different about me. I told him a condensed version of my time in Miami, leaving out the part where I got my battery recharged from Julian. And my trip to Brazil. Knowing that he was John’s cousin, I felt weird even thinking about it.
“Well I’m glad you followed through on those suggestions. Trust me. If you had stayed here, you wouldn’t have bounced back as quickly. Between the disappearing sun and the cold weather this is my least favorite time of the year in the city.”He grimaced as he spoke causing me to giggle at his facial expression.
“You have a point. I stepped out of the airport and was hit with a rude awakening. However, I am looking forward to maybe seeing some snow. That is, if I’m here for Christmas.” I hoped that my life would be back to normal by then.
“Snow is so overrated. Wait and see for yourself.” He leaned back in his chair with a look that said I would be sorry. I just shrugged and laughed it off.
“Ok, so about your visit today. I need to show you a few pictures and then you can tell me if you recognize any of these men.”
Ryan pulled out a file with pictures of five different men. I squinted my eyes for a closer look and he slid the pictures closer to me. Two of the men were strangers to me, one I recognized as a bouncer from Echo, and I froze when I recognized the last two. Edward and Manny, my doorman, were in a surveillance picture together. I looked up at Ryan in shock and confusion.
“I’m not sure what it all means right now, but the man you didn’t recognize was the driver the night you were attacked. The man you recognized from the club says that he was told to take the rest of the night off by Edward. I still don’t know what the connection is to him and your doorman.”
“Wow,” I whispered as I continued to stare at the photos. “None of this makes any sense.”
“It doesn’t look good, that’s for sure. I’ve been trying to get in touch with Edward to ask him a few questions, but he’s been hard to pin down. I don’t want to approach Manny just yet, because that will really tip them off if they are involved. So for now, just lay low. I don’t think anyone is coming after you, but be on guard. And make sure to call me if anything suspicious happens.”
“Got it,” I sighed. This was a lot.
“So aren’t you going to tell me about your trip?”
I tried to rack my brain to remember if I told him about my trip to Brazil. I know I didn’t tell him over the phone. Did I? Ryan just chuckled at my obvious state of confusion.
“John told me about your trip, Jade,” he admitted.
“Oh, he did?” I was still playing dumb.
“I give you credit. You are really good at keeping secrets. I know he told you I’m his cousin. John and I don’t keep many things from each other.” We both laughed a little.
“Well, I wasn’t sure and he told me not to say anything. How come I never met you before?” If they were so close, why had I never met him?
“For one, I was tied up with another assignment all summer. And two, John and I have a more professional relationship. Sounds weird, but we’re men. We don’t hang out and do each other’s nails. If he checks in once or twice a month, I’m good. So, are you getting back together?”
“For the record, all women don’t sit around and do each other’s nails. Also, I’m not inclined to discuss my personal affairs at this time,” I snipped. Ryan just grinned.
“Duly noted.”
“Why do you ask?” I wanted to know what he was getting at.
“Well, I just wondered what you planned to do with your other boyfriend.” He drawled.
“Excuse me? I hope your investigative work is better than your gossip, because last I checked I was single. Thanks for the concern.” I tried to keep a serious face as I pretended to let him have it. It didn’t seem to work because he just kept laughing.
“I would never have guessed it by looking at you, but you’re trouble. Get out of my office before I have you brought down on charges of being a severe player!” He jibed.
“Whatever. Good day Detective Walsh!” I shot back.
After stopping by my office to grab a few files, I stopped at the little market near my apartment. I wasn’t in the mood to cook dinner, but they always had a great selection of soups and fresh salads to choose from. I decided on a beef-less chili and half a southwestern salad, and picked up a few things to hold me over for the next few days. I didn’t need anything heavy if I wanted to keep fitting into my skimpiest bikini.
When I arrived at my building, there wasn’t a doorman to greet me. It wasn’t unusual for them to step away for breaks or to use the restroom, so I just used my key fob to enter the secured door. My mail hadn’t been checked in days so I grabbed it and hit the elevator button. My mail fell in my struggle to juggle everything that I was holding, and pull my keys out of my purse. I opened my door to put the rest of my belongings down and then turned back to get my mail; when I turned around, Edward was standing there holding my mail. I jumped back, startled by his sudden appearance, and he eased his way into my apartment.
“You really should be more careful, leaving your door ajar like that. Someone dangerous could have been out there,” he goaded me.
“What are you doing here?” The hairs on the back of my neck were on high alert.
“I just came to pay you a friendly visit. We haven’t talked in a while and I wanted us to catch up.” He tossed my mail on the counter, and I watched as he made himself comfortable, he even walked past me into the kitchen to grab a drink. My heart was pounding in my chest at the thought of why he was here.
“If you wanted to talk you could have called me and set something up. You didn’t have to come here and scare me half to death, Edward.”
“Says the woman who has been avoiding me for months. Tell me. Now that Julian is back in the picture, how does that change things for your lawyer friend? I heard he decided to cut you lose a while back. I guess he was smarter than I gave him credit for.” Edward casually sipped his water as he insulted me.
“None of that is any of your business. Like I said, if you want to talk about the boutique I can meet you at my office any day this week.”
“But I never said exactly what I wanted to talk to you about. You seem so impatient to get rid of me. You may as well get used to me if we are going to be family, after all.” Edward put his drink down and made his way back towards me. I was still standing in t
he same spot as when he first entered. My feet didn’t know which way to take me, so they gave up. I wished my purse was closer so that I could grab my phone, but it was behind Edward and I didn’t dare move any closer to him. When he began to move into my personal space, I backed away until he had me cornered up against my kitchen bar.
“What do you want!” I hissed. Normally, I would have slapped him or scratched his eyes out just for being so close, but common sense was telling me that Edward was very dangerous. I just wanted him gone.
“Tell me where Julian is,” he demanded. I frowned at his question, figuring that if anyone knew it would have been him.
“Sorry you came all this way, but I don’t know where he is.” I answered in a cool tone. Edward grabbed my jaw, pulling my face closer to his. I tried to squirm away but that only encouraged him to increase his grip.
“Ow! You’re hurting me!” I cried.
“Good. Then maybe this time when I ask you, you will tell me the truth.” He growled.
“I am telling the truth. I don’t know where he is. He said he couldn’t tell me.” Real tears began to roll down my cheeks when he didn’t release his hold on me. He studied my face for a minute, bringing his so close that his lips grazed mine when he spoke.
“You may or may not be telling me the truth, but I’ve already wasted enough time on you. Consider this a warning. If I find out your lying, I will be extremely angry. And you don’t want that.”
In the blink of an eye, he released me and stormed out of the apartment. I dashed over to lock the deadbolt and engage my alarm before I rushed to my phone. I called Ryan and explained to him what just happened. He was pissed that Edward got to me and told me he had men in the area looking to apprehend him. He would make an official report of the attack. He also encouraged me to file a complaint with my building manager. Then I called Julian again, but I got no answer. I paced back and forth through my living room, too afraid to get comfortable, but even more afraid to open my door to leave my house. I tried to call Jackie, to warn her about Edwards behavior, but my call went to voicemail. I cursed when I remembered that John wouldn’t be back from California for a couple more days. Then I tried calling Julian several more times, but all my calls and messages went unanswered.
Only Her Heart (The Jaded Hearts Club) Page 15