One In A Billion

by Anne-Marie Hart

  Alice, who was on the bus that morning, didn't see the punch from where she was sat, and didn't know about it until Toby was recounting the story years later. Cal, one of the group of listeners, was proud of his defence of Jenny, but inwardly embarrassed at his thoughtless treatment of Toby.

  At school, Martin and Toby were called to the principals office individually. Toby waited patiently while Martin went in first, and when he was done, he watched the boy get hustled back to his classroom by his form tutor, Mr Hardwick.

  'You're fucking dead', Martin said to him threateningly, before Mr Hardwick, hair still as long, and goatee still as prominent, hurried him along by the scruff of his neck.

  The principal was a man called Peter Talbot, who looked so much like Mr Burns from the Simpsons, his secretary was nicknamed Smithers even though she wasn't a man, and didn't look anything like him. In the handful of dealings Toby had had with him so far, he knew him to be a hateful, spineless, coward of a man. This wasn't the first time Toby had been pulled up in front of him, having got in trouble for the graffiti work he'd left all over the school, which had been linked to him through his art work sketchbook the art teacher felt it his duty to hand in to the principal. That art teacher was now gone, replaced by someone much more open minded, who was one of the only teachers Toby admired in the school, and one of the only ones who in turn admired Toby. He was also, by luck or design, his form tutor, and the man who stood alongside him now.

  'Fighting, smoking, graffiti, fighting again', Peter Talbot said.

  'It wasn't my fault', Toby said.

  'No, of course, it never is. Martin has a suspected broken nose, did you know that?'

  'He had it coming to him', Toby said.

  'Right, that's your attitude is it? He had it coming to him.'

  'He was calling me names', Toby said.

  'Names? You broke the boy's nose because he was calling you names? What the hell is wrong with you Green? You can't just go around beating people up because they call you names.'

  'If anyone has been beaten', Mr Benfield said.

  'I can see. Martin defending himself', Mr Talbot said.

  'This is what you call defending yourself?' Mr Benfield continued. 'Show him your chest. Go on, lift up your shirt and show him your chest.'

  Toby lifted up his shirt. His body was caked in bruises.

  'It's not good enough Toby', Mr Talbot said, ignoring the red marks and yellow welts covering his skin. 'This isn't the first time either. Fighting in years 7 and 8, smoking in year 9, graffiti all over the school earlier this year, and now this, attacking a fellow student on a school bus home. You're lucky I don't call the police in.'

  'It won't happen again', Toby said.

  'You're damn right it won't happen again. Now, Mr Benfield here thinks you're a promising art student, whatever the hell that means, and he thinks I should give you another chance to prove yourself. I think you're a lost cause.'

  Mr Benfield squeezed Toby's shoulder.

  'You're suspended', Mr Talbot said. 'For a week. Active immediately.'

  'Suspended?' Mr Benfield said. 'That's your way of dealing with this?'

  'Careful Chris', Mr Talbot said. 'The boy's lucky I didn't expel him. Martin's father still wants to press charges.'

  'I'll get someone to call your parents to come and pick you up. Until they do, you can wait in reception. And Toby', Mr Talbot said, looking at him over his half glasses, 'the next time anything like this happens, you will be expelled. Do you understand me?'

  'Yes', Toby said.

  'Yes what?'

  'Yes, sir.'

  Martin was neither suspended, nor disciplined in any way by any one of authority, but nor did he fulfil his promise of exacting revenge on Toby. Toby's father came to pick him up later that day, and in an otherwise silent ride home, told the despondent teenager that he loved him, and he didn't blame him for what had happened.

  'It's not the same without you', Alice said to him, one evening laid flat out on the wood of the tree-house, looking up to the stars. 'It's boring.'

  'School, or the bus ride', Toby said, sarcastically.

  'You know what I mean', Alice said, tickling his ribs and folding herself into him.

  He spent the suspension working on his art, getting stoned and throwing stones into the lake he used to fish in. When he got back to school he was welcomed as a kind of hero. The bad boy who had beat the system and was back to prove it. There were still chants on the bus, still led by Martin, but his supporters were slowly dwindling, and less than a month after he'd come back, they faded out entirely, never to return.

  Summer came. A blistering heatwave, and long, endless days of doing nothing else but lying on the grass, smoking joints and making shapes out of clouds. Toby's graffiti spread out, and people found pieces hidden all over different parts of the city of Cambridge, and more in the villages that surrounded it. Those that knew his style knew it was him, but nobody else did. Lisa and Clare, the two closest friends of Alice, changed their attitude towards Toby. Their boyfriends did too. They began to respect him. He smoked, he knew where to score hash, he graffitied all over the place, and what's more, he had talent, and he knew how to use it. He'd shaved his head, didn't give a fuck about authority, was happy to risk everything for something he believed in, and most importantly, girls thought he was hot. It took just one person to say it, and another to agree, before a wave of public opinion was created. People were finally taking notice - girls suddenly wanted to be with him, and guys wanted to be him. He might have been poor, less well educated than the majority, but he was cool, and everyone was slowly beginning to realise it. With Jack and Cal finally on his side, Lisa and Clare too, he had the attention of everyone in the school. He'd turned public opinion around.

  Finally, almost two years after they'd had their first kiss, Alice told everyone proudly that Toby was her boyfriend. No-one batted an eyelid, no-one excluded them, no-one persecuted them. Toby and Alice were the perfect king and queen of the school, and with that, his transformation was finally complete.

  'I have to tell you something', Alice said.

  Toby was skinning up again, one eye on his joint, another on the school in the distance, just in case a teacher should happen to begin strolling up to see what they were up to. Alice put her hand on his leg.

  'Go on', Toby said.

  Alice began crying, she couldn't help it.

  'What's wrong Alice?' Toby said, giving up on his joint to comfort her.

  What had begun as a few tears, hit Alice so strongly she doubled up over Toby and began to bawl down his back. It felt like someone was wringing out a wet towel.

  'Is it the grades?' Toby said. 'Fuck Mr Rutter, it doesn't matter what he thinks.'

  'It isn't Mr Rutter', Alice said, finally able to compose herself enough to talk. 'Do you love me?' she asked.

  'Why are you asking me that, of course I do', Toby said.

  'You'll love me no matter what happens?' Alice said.

  'What is this?' Toby said, a little worried.

  'Say it Toby, say it, please.'

  'I love you no matter what happens', Toby said. 'You know that Alice. I've always loved you, from the moment I saw your stupid face.'

  Alice smiled, but it wasn't enough to stop the tears.

  'Come on', he said. 'You can tell me.'

  'Dad got another job', Alice said.

  'Right', Toby said. 'So what.'

  'We're leaving Toby. We're moving back to London.'

  'No', Toby said.

  Alice nodded, and then folded herself into him

  'When?' Toby said.

  'After the prom', she said. 'They're going to let me go to that, like it's all I need.'

  'Stay', Toby said.

  'How? Where am I going to go?'

  'Stay with me', Toby said.

  'I can't', Alice said. 'You know I can't.'

  'Fuck', Toby said.

  Alice nodded. Tears were streaming down her eyes which she tried to wipe aw
ay with the back of her hand, but it did no good. They wouldn't stop coming. 'Mmmmhhhmmmm, fucked up hey? That's my parents for you. Always thinking about me.'

  Toby lay back on the grass, unrolled spliff at his feet, left to its own devices. He felt a hollow in his gut like a sucker punch. He didn't have anything to say. Drifting across the grass they could hear the school bell going. Lunch was over and afternoon classes were about to start. It was the last day of the school year for them. They'd already got their results and this was supposed to be a kind of a fun goodbye day the teachers had to put on for them to fulfil curriculum hour requirements.

  'Come on', Alice said. 'Two more hours and then we're free.'

  She pulled Toby to her feet.

  'Are you going to open it?' Alice said when they were half way across the field.

  'I already did', Toby said. 'I got an A*.'

  Chapter 13

  After trying out two, three and four (reverse cowgirl, tiger style and kangaroo hopping), Devizes leant me his phone while he went for a shower.

  'Yeah', came Sophia's voice from the other end of the line. She sounded like she was at the bottom of the sea.

  'Sophia, it's me, Alice', I said, stretching out on the bed, amazed to find I couldn't reach either side even as I was, spread out into a star shape.

  'Alice, where the fuck are you?' Sophia said, breathing heavily.

  'What are you doing?' I said.

  'Er, exercising', Sophia lied. I could recognise those deep breaths anywhere.

  'I'm in Polynesia', I said, ignoring the fact that my best friend was fucking someone while I talked to her.

  'Get the fuck out of here!' Sophia said, and then, a little more quietly. 'No, not you, you stay right where you are.'

  'I know right', I said. Devizes had come back into the room, and my eyes went to him as he towelled off his wet body. He really was built like an Olympic champion. If sex was an event, by the way, he'd clearly come out on top.

  'That's insane', Sophia said. It was clear that talking was becoming quite difficult for her. 'She's in Polynesia', Sophia said more quietly.

  'Fuck', came the response. I could picture sweaty thighs and teeth gripping a lower lip.

  'What time is it there?' Sophia said.

  'I don't know, morning. Maybe afternoon now. We've kind of been getting to know each other.'

  Devizes crawled onto the bed and began kissing my legs, working his way up to my bum.

  'I know what that means!' Sophia said. 'Come back home soon, I miss you!'

  'I will', I said.

  I could feel the heat coming off Devizes as he began to stir again. The man was an animal, or a machine, I couldn't tell.

  'Sophia', I said before I left her. 'No sex in my bed, ok?'

  'Ok', Sophia said. 'I'll wait until you get back for that.'

  I clicked off and handed the phone back to Devizes.

  'You don't want to call your family to tell them your news?' he said. 'Your boss?'

  'They can wait. Come here', I said.

  I pulled him towards me and we hugged each other, pressing our naked bodies together like giant lips kissing.

  'This is the nicest thing that anyone has ever done for me', I said.

  'Alice, you make it an absolute pleasure', Devizes said, and kissed me for real.

  'Sometimes I can't believe you're real', I said. 'I just, I spent so long looking for Mr. Right, not to mention trying to become a writer, and they've both come to me.'

  'Sometimes the only way to find something is to stop looking', Devizes said.

  'That's what I think I'm beginning to realise.'

  'Come on', Devizes said. 'I should show you the island.'

  He tried to get up but I wouldn't let him.

  'I've got everything I need here', I said.

  'You're happy lying in bed all day?' Devizes asked.

  'As long as you're in it with me', I said.

  'We'll have to stop for food and drink at some point', Devizes said. 'Otherwise we'll fuck ourselves into extinction.'

  'I don't care if we fuck more today', I said. 'Ok, maybe once more. I just like being here with you, having you hold me. It makes me feel safe.'

  'Ok', Devizes said. 'Safe I can do.'

  I nestled into him and rested my head on his chest. A little while later I could feel sleep gnawing at my edges again.

  'I'm tired', I said.

  I'd slept well but this place was so relaxing, I couldn't help but feel like sleeping again. Out of the open window, through which a cooling breeze was blowing, I could see the forest and the sea beyond. There were colourful birds flying about I'd never before seen in my life, and the tree tops swayed beautifully in tune with the movement of the water beyond. I knew the other side of the island was a messy chaos, but this, this part here that Devizes had chosen for his own, was absolutely mesmerising.

  'It's like paradise here', I said, my words heavy with sleep and spoken into Devizes's chest, so they came out sounding nothing like I had meant. Devizes stroked my hair and let the sleepiness take me under. Moments later, with the breeze twisting the edges of the thin white curtains, and tickling my feet like nibbling fish, my head sunk so deeply into Devizes's chest, his natural aroma of burnt wood and wet forest moss filling my lungs sweetly, holding on to him for safety, should I need a strong man to ensure me safe passage, I fell into a sleep so deep, I could feel it in my bone marrow.

  ***

  There were several things I learned about Devizes, and probably about myself, in the short time that we spent together. I realised I liked sleep much more than I had initially realised. During the time that we spent on the island, I spent a large portion of it spread out like a starfish, my eyes closed and my mouth open, and another massive amount asleep. Ok, so we had a lot of sex too!

  Devizes maintained his incredible stamina, and by Friday, we had worked our way around all of the thirteen bedrooms, some of the fifteen bathrooms, the patio, the spa, the cinema, the private beach, and even the dining hall, where we were embarrassingly caught by one of the staff members. I'll never forget him opening the double doors, standing there momentarily with a chain of staff members behind him, smiling apologetically and leaving as ceremoniously as he'd entered. I realised that I liked freshly caught fish, expensive imported meats, vintage champagne and red wine, but I liked not having to cook at all, more than anything else.

  I learnt that Devizes can't sleep, and he can't stop working. His phone must have gone of a hundred times, and even if he turned off his mobile, people seemed to be able to find a way of contacting him. He was apologetic at first, and then insistent on taking almost everything that came through to him - this already filtered by a staff member either there on the island or in one of his many offices - I never learnt how many he had. When Devizes was working, I spent time reading, relaxing, eating, or just looking at the wonderful view out across the bay.

  I also realised that Devizes seemed to be driven by only one thing, and that was making money. He was good at it, of course, it was what had made him successful, but when I tried to pry, and find out exactly what it was that made him tick, what it was that he liked doing, he couldn't say. Sure he enjoyed fine wines and exotic foods, and he had expensive tastes, but there didn't seem to be anything else that was a passion for him. He seemed to do these things because he could, and felt like he should just because of that, but not because he really felt passionate about them. The only thing he seemed passionate about was work, and like I said before, that was because he could make money.

  We argued only once. I think it was my fault really, and it wasn't even an argument. He'd received a call for like the thousandth time, on perhaps the third or fourth evening we were there, and it was during dinner, when the sun was setting beautifully over the water, and I thought it would be an incredible moment for us both to experience to reminisce on when we got older - yes I was already thinking about that after only a few weeks with each other, the hopelessly sad romantic that I am. Devizes couldn'
t sit still, and so he ended up missing it, and I felt put out. I sulked for a while, and then bit at him when he tried to find out what was wrong. Needless to say, it didn't take long for us to make up with each other. I think if I remember correctly that was one of the times we did it on the balcony.

  I had an amazing time overall, and there is no way that I would have ever been able to do anything like it without Devizes. God knows how much the whole thing cost. A team of maybe ten staff members working twenty four hours a day, and kept on retainers when Devizes isn't using the house. A private jet and yacht to get us there in the first place. Wardrobes full of really expensive clothes, not that I really needed any. I spent eighty percent of the holiday in either a towelling robe, bikini, or naked, but the times when we'd leave his palatial home to experience the island, he invited me to select clothes from the massive collection he happened to have there already in the wardrobes.

  'Prepared for every occasion', was Devizes's way of explaining things, and anything that I liked, he said we'd take back to London so I could wear it there.

  We ate fresh food every day, and what hadn't been caught from the sea around us, Devizes had had imported. Some of the wines alone must have cost thousands of pounds. The whole thing was incredible.

  When we weren't fucking, or eating, or when I wasn't sleeping and Devizes wasn't working, we went out. We took a boat to the smaller two islands that he owns, which were both too small to be habitable, but had the most amazing beaches I have ever seen. Devizes and I waded out from one hand in hand, and about a mile out from the shore, the water still only came up to our waists, and the water was so clean, we could see hundreds of beautiful multicoloured fish swimming about around us in shoals. The sand on all three of the islands was whiter than I'd ever seen before too. It made Weymouth look like a rubbish dump.