Slightly Off Balance

by Kaylie Hunter

  “And after the Ferris wheel?”

  “I was a little more concerned, but not worried. Then the car started acting up, and I might have gotten a bit nervous then, but worse things could’ve happened.”

  “So it takes three threatening situations for you to get nervous. Good to know!”

  Reel stepped away and started pacing.

  “I suppose when someone tried to run you off the road, that made you, what? Slightly concerned? How about when someone tried to kidnap you? And, oh, the gas leak that could have blown you to bits? Were you even scared then? Do you understand how serious this is?”

  “Sure,” I agreed.

  “Sure? Sure? Someone is trying to kill you, Deanna!”

  “But they’re not very good at it,” I laughed.

  Samantha snorted, and Reel turned his glare at her. She stammered some incoherent words and ran out of the kitchen, into the serving area.

  I laughed again.

  “This is not funny,” Reel snapped.

  “It kind of is. I think you’ve just had too much coffee.”

  “What if someone comes after you and I’m not around? What are you going to do then?”

  I reached behind my back and pulled out the revolver I was wearing clipped to my pants under my shirt. “I don’t want to, but if I have to, I’ll shoot him.”

  Reel shook his head and rolled his eyes. “You really think you could kill someone?”

  “Hell no,” I said, shaking my head. “But I’m a really good shot. I could shoot a pinky toe or something, so I had time to run away. Some scientists say that due to evolution, the human race no longer needs the baby toe. Based on that theory, I wouldn’t be maiming anyone.”

  Samantha snorted, obviously standing on the other side of the door listening.

  “Samantha, get in here!” Reel ordered.

  Samantha peeked in the door, and when she saw where Reel was standing, she skirted away from him to the other side of me.

  “What about you? Do you know how to shoot?”

  Samantha pulled a shotgun from the underside of the prep table, laying it off to the side. She then walked over to her purse and pulled out a gigantic handgun that looked like it should be in an over-the-top action movie.

  “And if someone is coming after Deanna?”

  “I won’t be aiming for his foot,” Samantha said. “Someone tries to hurt Tweedle when I’m around, they leave in a coroner’s van.”

  I looked back at the shotgun and then looked under the table. Sure enough, there was a recessed cubby made to fit the shotgun perfectly.

  “How long has that been there?” I asked Samantha, pointing to the shotgun.

  “About fifteen years,” she said.

  “You’ve worked above a shotgun for ten years and never noticed it?” Reel yelled. “And you wonder why I worry about you?”

  “Reel, you need to calm down. You’re getting awfully worked up.”

  Reel slammed his hands on the table. Samantha took a protective step in front of me, still holding her handgun.

  “He won’t hurt me, Samantha,” I laughed, walking around the table to stand next to Reel. “Look, I should have told you or Uncle Mike about the snake, but I was hoping it was all a coincidence. But as you can see, Samantha has the action-hero thing down, and I’ll be fine for the rest of my shift. Go walk off your anger, and we can argue later.”

  Reel glared down at me for a few seconds, then leaned his head back and stared at the drop ceiling for another minute. After a big long sigh, he asked, “What time do you get done?”

  “We have some late afternoon orders, so I’ll be done around five. I can call if we get done earlier.”

  Reel was watching me to see whether I was fibbing. Eventually nodding, he looked back at Samantha.

  “I got it. Shoot to kill,” she nodded.

  “And, you really know how to use that?” Reel asked.

  “Tucker’s my great uncle. He taught me how to shoot.”

  “You swear that you won’t hesitate?”

  “It won’t be the first time I shot someone,” she said.

  “Really?” I asked, surprised.

  “Don’t repeat that,” Samantha said, giving me the stare down.

  It was Reel’s turn to snort. “Fine. I’m heading home for a nap before the furniture is delivered. Don’t leave the bakery unless you’re with your uncle or me.”

  “Yes, sir.”

  “I mean it.”

  “I know,” I sighed.

  Reel hesitated for several long silent seconds as he stared down at me. Finally, he released the breath he had been holding. “Be safe,” he said, pulling me by the back of the neck into him for a brief kiss before leaving through the back door.

  “Damn. I always heard the rumors, but I never actually thought they were true. No offense,” Samantha said.

  “What rumors?”

  “About you and Reel.”

  “What about me and Reel?”

  “That he’s in love with you and you’re oblivious to it,” she smirked.

  “He’s not in love with me,” I said, rolling my eyes. “Geesh. We’ve been friends since grade school. He thinks of me as a kid sister.”

  “He most certainly does not think of you as a sister,” she laughed.

  “Whatever. We don’t have time to argue. Finish the fritters so I can finish the apples.”

  “Trade. I’ll do the apples. I always burn myself with that deep-fryer.”

  I smiled, starting another batch of fritters.

  “Hey, the food I set out yesterday was still in the alley this morning. I replaced it with a fresh bag, but I think your teenager took off.”

  “Hopefully he went home or to a shelter,” I nodded, chewing on my lower lip.

  Chapter Seventeen

  It was busier than normal. We didn’t stop baking all day, and by 3:00 we still had special orders to bake. We were way behind schedule. Samantha was calling some of our customers and rescheduling later pickup times while I baked.

  I had nine pies in the oven, nine more ready to go in, and was mixing up a devil’s food chocolate cake when Samantha yelled for me to come up front.

  “What’s up?” I asked, walking through the door.

  “You whore!” Darlene screamed at me, coming around the counter and stalking me toward the window. “Don’t think that I didn’t hear that both the Thurman brothers have been sleeping at your house. I warned you to stay away from Rod!”

  “You’re my sister, but you better shut the hell up, right now.”

  “Or what? What are you going to do, you little slut?”

  I reached into the dessert case, pulled what was left of the lemon custard cake and mashed it into her face.

  It felt good. So, good in fact, that I mashed the rest of it into the top of her head, grinding it in for good measure.

  She screeched in horror.

  I laughed so hard, I had to lean over and brace myself with my hands on my knees.

  Uncle Mike rushed into the bakery and froze. He stared first at Darlene and then at me. A slight smirk appeared before he cleared his facial expression, stepped around the service counter, and steered Darlene through the dining area and out the door. He followed her as they walked down the sidewalk out of view.

  The customers all cheered and clapped.

  “For the record—I did not sleep with either one of the Thurman brothers!”

  Several of the women, including Samantha, booed. Even Mrs. Crookburn, who was enjoying her afternoon tea and pastry, booed. I shook my head and went to pull the pies out of the oven.

  After rotating the pies and using the last oven to start the cake, I went out with a broom and mop to clean up the mess I had made. Mrs. Crookburn was just leaving, and I rushed over to open the door for her. Sarah Temple was bouncing her baby girl on her hip, talking to Samantha by the register, while Sarah’s five-year-old son Bradley ran circles around one of the tables. Two local hunters sat on the other side of the room at one
of the small tables drinking coffee. Everyone else had cleared out. We should be good to close by 4:00 except for the late pickup orders, I thought.

  Hearing a loud roar behind me, I turned and saw Mrs. Crookburn’s car racing toward the storefront window.

  “Run!” I yelled, diving toward little Bradley, who was still doing laps around the table.

  Reaching him as the car crashed through the window, I tossed his little body toward the back hallway, toward the bathrooms. He was still airborne when I felt the car slam into me, rolling me on top of the hood.

  “Deanna!”

  “Tweedle!”

  “Deanna!”

  I heard them calling but my ears were fuzzy. No wait, my whole body was fuzzy. Nope. That wasn’t right either. My head was fuzzy. My body—hurt—everywhere.

  “Here,” I called out, but it sounded muffled.

  “DEANNA! Where are you?” I heard Reel scream.

  “Here,” I tried to say again, but it wasn’t much louder.

  “She’s over there,” a man’s voice called. “I can see her leg. The car must have thrown her under the table.”

  “Tweedle,” Uncle Mike yelled, standing over me. “Hang on. Don’t move.”

  “Bradley? Is Bradley okay?” I asked, rolling onto my back.

  “Don’t move,” Reel ordered, climbing over what appeared to be parts of a table to kneel where I was lying.

  “Bradley?” I asked again.

  “He’s okay. He said the crazy baking lady threw him. I assume that was you,” Reel said, stroking the side of my face.

  He might have been grinning, but his eyes were ice cold as he surveyed my body.

  “That bad, huh?” I coughed.

  “Your leg might be broke. And you have a couple deep cuts, but you’re going to be just fine,” he said, leaning over to kiss my forehead.

  “You don’t know that,” I coughed.

  I continued to cough and realized I was having trouble breathing.

  “Get this car out of here!” Reel yelled. “Rod! We need to get her out!”

  “We can’t pull the car out. It’s supporting one of the walls,” Rod yelled from somewhere.

  “Reel,” I said, reaching up to his face. “Get me out.”

  “You could have broken bones. A neck injury. A spine injury.”

  I coughed another round, gasping for air in between spitting up blood.

  “Screw it,” Reel said, reaching under me. “This is going to hurt. Just hang on.”

  My leg screamed in pain as it was shifted around and banged into things. Uncle Mike tried to follow to brace the leg, but he wasn’t able to keep up with Reel through all the debris. And Reel wasn’t waiting for him. For the first time, I saw real fear flash across his face as he watched me struggle to breathe.

  “Are you nuts?” Rod yelled.

  “She can’t breathe!” Reel yelled back.

  “Shit. Get the backboard!”

  “Is she okay?” a woman called out as I was moved out into the sunlight. “You saved my son, Tweedle. Thank you! You saved my son!”

  I was laid on a backboard at the same time it was being lifted to a gurney. Everything around me was spinning. I could no longer pull a breath into my lungs, no matter how hard I tried. I looked up at Reel as he wiped tears from my cheeks. I didn’t even know I was crying. I wondered whether he knew that he was crying too. I passed out.

  Chapter Eighteen

  “You should go home and get some sleep,” Uncle Mike said.

  He sounded close by, but my eyes refused to open.

  “You should go home and get some sleep,” Reel said.

  “I’m family. If anyone’s staying, it’ll be me,” Uncle Mike snapped. “Besides, you were the one who was supposed to be keeping an eye on her.”

  “I’m not likely to forget. But you’re the one who didn’t even know she was in danger, long before I got back into town.”

  “If you really cared about her, you’d quit your job and find something local.”

  “Like what? Construction? What exactly do you expect me to do?”

  “Then find someone else!”

  “Not happening, Mike. I already told you. I’m not waiting any longer. I’ve waited eight years. It’s her choice now.”

  “What choice? To become a widow or a lonely wife whose husband is never home? Is that really the life you want for her?”

  “You think she isn’t lonely already? How many dates has she been on in the past eight years? How many times has she fallen in love?”

  “She’s dated!”

  “Three times! And, she never went on a second date with any of them! I might not have been around, but I’ve kept an eye on her. I’ve always been here when she needed me.”

  “You’ll break her heart,” Uncle Mike whispered.

  “I’d kill myself before I ever hurt her,” Reel whispered.

  I drifted back to sleep.

  “I’m not leaving,” Reel said.

  “Me neither,” Uncle Mike said.

  “Both of you, out!” Aunt Carol scolded. “Right now. Go to the bar. Go home and shower. Go swim in the lake. I don’t really care. You stink. You’re scaring the staff. And I’m sick of the constant bickering. The doctors said she’ll be fine, so GO!”

  I heard some huffing and puffing, followed by some shuffling of feet. A minute later, it was quiet in the room except for Aunt Carol’s soft humming.

  “Are they gone?” I asked. My voice was scratchy. I raised my arm to my throat, but I must have been on some good drugs because my hand came flying up at warp speed, and I smacked myself in the face.

  Aunt Carol laughed and came over to hold up a cup with a straw. She gently helped me lift enough to drink before settling me back down.

  “They’re going to be pissed when they find out that you woke as soon as they left. I swear they were having a standoff to see which one could sit the longest in those uncomfortable chairs.”

  “I woke up once before, but they were arguing. I decided I was too tired to deal with it, and I went back to sleep.”

  “Smart girl. They’re both being alpha idiots.”

  “Alpha idiots,” I grinned. “Samantha? The other customers?”

  “You were the only one hurt bad enough for an ambulance. One of the other customers needed stitches, and everyone had a few bruises except the baby and Bradley. I hear you launched Bradley like a football,” she said, leaning over to kiss my forehead.

  “Good thing he doesn’t weigh much.”

  “Tansey’s been in and out. You know hospitals are hard for her, but she’s stopped in twice a day since you were brought here.”

  “Call her and tell her I’m good. But not to visit me. I’ll be home soon.”

  “I’ll text her, but I don’t think it will work,” she said as she texted a message. “She’ll need to see you awake with her own eyes.”

  “Why couldn’t I breathe?”

  “One of your lungs collapsed. They blew it back up, or whatever they do. You have a couple bruised ribs, some stitches, and you smashed the shit out of your leg. But nothing that won’t heal.”

  “Mrs. Crookburn’s car?”

  “It was an accident. Mrs. Crookburn thought she was in reverse and didn’t realize she had the accelerator pedal all the way to the floor. She’s promised to never drive again.”

  “You mean that mailboxes will once again be safe in Pine Valley?”

  “The hardware store already has big signs all over town that a new selection of mailboxes and posts will be available by tomorrow.”

  “What day is it?”

  “Friday. They gave you the good drugs, so you’d sleep for a few days. They didn’t want you moving around much.”

  I nodded, and Aunt Carol helped me take another drink of water before she started jetting around the room cleaning. She picked up trash, folded blankets, and then started dead-heading the flowers.

  “Aunt Carol?”

  “Hmm?”

  “Did my mother
come to check on me?”

  “Not that I know of. I don’t think your uncle or Reel would have let her near you if she did. She probably knows that.”

  “She really does hate me, doesn’t she?”

  “I don’t think so. No. I think your mother just doesn’t know how to love anyone other than herself,” she sighed. “Your sister seems to have inherited the same trait. But I heard through the grapevine that you taught her not to mess with you,” Aunt Carol winked.

  “The lemon cake!” I chuckled, clutching my ribs as they protested. “I forgot.”

  “Betty Fergin was coming out of the beauty shop when your uncle was leading Darlene away. Betty took pictures of Darlene with her phone and sent them to me. I’m going to get one of them blown up and framed. Hang it over my toilet.”

  “Ooh. That’s mean,” I said, trying not to laugh.

  “She deserves it,” Aunt Carol shrugged. “Besides, I need something for the wall in there, anyway. I think the yellow color of the lemon cake has a nice pop to it with Darlene’s blue dress as the backdrop. It will go well with my towels.”

  “Remind me to never piss you off.”

  I looked around the room at all the flowers. I noticed the room was large with a full-size couch and two recliner chairs.

  “How’d I get such a fancy room? My insurance isn’t going to cover this. Hell, I’m not sure my insurance will cover anything.”

  “Reel had your room upgraded. I have no idea how much it was, but he wrote a check, and the administrator ran off in the other direction holding it in a death grip.”

  “I’ll have to clean out my savings to pay him back.”

  “He doesn’t expect you to. And your uncle doesn’t know about it, so I’d keep it on the DL.”

  “Oh my God! You really are alive!” Tansey screeched from the doorway, throwing her purse and a teddy bear on the floor as she ran to me and covered my cheek with kisses. “Shit! You scared the hell out of me!”

  “You were scared? I was the one running from a crazed Buick!”

  “I assure you, the experience was much worse for me.”

  “Was that my teddy bear that you dumped on the floor?”

  “Oh, yeah.” She ran back and picked up her purse and the bear. “It’s like the sixth stuffed animal I’ve bought. I couldn’t think of anything else to buy. You weren’t awake so Klondike bars wouldn’t work.”