Married for Real (Harlequin Presents)

by Lindsay Armstrong

  ‘But I’ve got the book here.’

  ‘I know it off by heart, we both do, don’t we?’ Arizona said gently. ‘So what shall we start with? You choose…’

  Fifteen minutes later she put the phone down and rubbed her brow wearily, feeling drained and tense.

  Declan watched her for a moment then walked over to her, put his hands on her shoulders and started to massage them. He also said with a strange little smile, ‘I can see we are going to be hard put to get much more of a honeymoon. It was probably my fault—too big a day today.’ He grimaced. ‘But I did want them to be here for you—for their sakes and yours.’

  Arizona searched his eyes but that steely glint was gone. So was the indifference, but at the same time his blue gaze was entirely enigmatic. She moistened her lips and thought that she’d never felt more at sea with Declan Holmes than she did now. ‘I know, and I’m grateful, but I did say I’d go back tomorrow…’

  ‘I heard. Does she get these nightmares often?’

  ‘Not for ages.’ His long fingers were working a minor miracle.

  ‘It’s just going to take a bit more time, I guess. You look exhausted. Come back to bed.’ And he released her to take her hand. Just like that, she thought, dazed, as she went with him obediently. Did I imagine the rest?

  And she stood compliantly while he slipped the blue robe off and slid the ruby nightgown on over her head.

  ‘Did you leave the teddies behind?’

  She blinked. ‘Oh—yes.’

  He smiled. ‘I’m glad in a way. You look about nineteen in it. Certainly not both a wife and a widow. Hop in,’ he invited and pulled the bedclothes back.

  But Arizona stared at him, her eyes dark and shadowed, and seemed unable to move. So he picked her up and laid her down as if she was a child, then he got in beside her, turned her on her side so she was facing away from him and took her in his arms.

  She moved once, but he slid his hand slowly down her flank and said into her hair, ‘Go to sleep, Arizona. It’s been a big day all round.’

  She did, after a while, thinking that it might have been too big a day for her as well as Daisy, because she didn’t seem to understand anything any more, and certainly not why she should be falling under the soothing spell of what this man was doing to her, a man who was her husband but in some respects a complete stranger. Nor why he should be doing it after the things he’d said.

  And she woke in the morning with the same thoughts on her mind, and reached across the bed suddenly—but she was alone.

  CHAPTER SEVEN

  ‘WELL, I won’t go looking for him this time.’

  Her words seemed to echo and she sighed, laid her cheek on the pillow and wondered if she was being childish or ridiculous or particularly fanciful. But for some reason it does make me uneasy, she mused, and it probably was just that uneasiness that led me into committing the solecism of mentioning Pete on our wedding night, although it wasn’t really such a solecism, did he but know it…

  The thing is, she thought, I’ve got the oddest feeling that he expects it to be all or nothing for me, which doesn’t quite fit in with our mutual concept of this marriage and might not be what I’ll get from him. Then again, the real thing is, does the fact that always waking up alone upsets me mean I’m going to want more than I’m going to get from Declan Holmes? And if that’s the case, I’m in trouble…

  She stared unseeingly across the room then closed her eyes briefly. Five minutes later she got up and started to pack. Then she showered and dressed in a shorts suit outfit made from silky crepe in thyme green with a tiny beige dot, a beige blouse to go beneath the jacket and thyme flat shoes. It was one of her purchases and was cool, elegant and uncrushable for travelling.

  She was just closing her last case when the door opened and Declan came in with a tray.

  ‘Ah,’ he murmured after one long moment when they stared at each other, ‘you’re up. I was hoping to bring you breakfast in bed.’

  ‘Thank you. But I’m up, as you see,’ she replied evenly.

  ‘And still annoyed with me.’ He crossed over to the table by the window, put the tray down and pulled out one of the chairs with a polite gesture. He added with a wry lift of an eyebrow, ‘Why don’t you sit down and tell me all about it?’

  Oh, no, you don’t! Arizona thought, and sat down, composed. ‘I didn’t say that, Declan.’

  ‘Everything points to it, however.’ He sat down opposite, removed some covers and revealed two perfect herb omelettes. There was also fresh orange juice and toast.

  ‘I don’t see why,’ she answered calmly. ‘This is a fair jump from opening a can of baked beans,’ she added quizzically.

  ‘Would that it were—the staff are back.’

  ‘I see.’ Arizona said and refrained from saying, so the honeymoon is over. He was also dressed, in a grey and white striped shirt, maroon tie and charcoal trousers.

  ‘Well, I guess as soon as I’ve finished this I can head for home.’ She paused. ‘The only thing is that my car is still at the Hilton, but perhaps you wouldn’t mind giving me a lift into town? I gather you won’t be coming down with me.’

  ‘As it happens, I’m going to give you a lift to Scawfell, although I won’t be able to stay,’ he said and continued to eat his omelette imperturbably.

  ‘You don’t have to drive all that way, Declan, I’ll be fine.’

  ‘I’m sure you will,’ he murmured, ‘but I’m not driving you, I’m flying you.’

  ‘And how will I get my car back?’ Arizona enquired.

  ‘I’ll have someone return it for you. It may interest you to know that one of the reasons I acquired a helicopter, apart from not wasting my Navy training and because I do have to hop about the place such a lot, was that I thought it would bring me back to your side much more quickly than any other means.’ He caught and held her gaze and raised his orange juice to her.

  ‘Ah, but I imagine it will do the opposite just as speedily,’ Arizona commented with considerable irony.

  His blue gaze hardened and he put the glass down. ‘My dear, I don’t know if you have any idea what the country is going through at the moment or how peculiarly it affects my business—’

  ‘I do, I do,’ Arizona interrupted. ‘I realize all sorts of things. That Daisy is waiting anxiously, for another, that this is how we decided our marriage would be—I’m not complaining, Declan.’ She glanced at her packed bags, at her purse and sunglasses set neatly ready and waiting on the bed. ‘I’m being if anything most cooperative, I would have thought,’ she finished gently.

  ‘At the same time as you’d like to scratch my eyes out,’ he said after a tense little pause.

  Arizona sipped some juice and slipped the stern of the glass between her fingers before she said dryly, ‘Dear me, Declan, do you really think I’d be so uncouth?’

  ‘Not uncouth at all,’ he corrected her as dryly. ‘But I really think that were we to go to bed now, you’d fight me every inch of the way, and enjoy every minute of it.’

  Arizona stood up and slammed her knife and fork together beside her unfinished omelette. ‘Don’t count on it, and don’t dare to lay even a finger on me,’ she warned him furiously.

  ‘Sit down, Arizona,’ he recommended, not angrily nor even particularly coldly, but something in his eyes warned her to obey him or suffer the consequences.

  She tightened her mouth and sat down.

  He waited a moment then said evenly, ‘What are we fighting about, Arizona? If it’s still to do with you being forced to marry me, let me ask you this. Do you regret sleeping with me at the Hilton, do you regret me making love to you beside the pool or here in this very bed? If you do I have to tell you you’re a sensational actress. Do you regret being able to go back to Scawfell and starting to do all the things you’ve been wanting to do for ages?’

  ‘I…’ She clenched her fists in her lap. ‘No.’

  ‘So?’ He gazed at her narrowly.

  ‘I think you better take me ba
ck to Scawfell, Declan,’ she said very quietly. ‘It’s just possible that new brides are a bit emotionally unstable,’ she added and wondered if he knew the effort it cost her to smile slightly. ‘Sorry.’

  ‘In that case I think there’s something else I ought to do.’

  Her lips parted as she suddenly recognized the way he was looking at her. And she trembled inwardly.

  ‘But only to—warm and reassure you,’ he said. ‘Not fight you.’

  ‘You really don’t have to, Declan,’ she said, barely audibly. ‘I’m all right.’ And I now know exactly what I’m up against, she thought, but again, did not say.

  ‘On the other hand, would you like me to?’ he asked.

  ‘Like you to?’ She hesitated.

  ‘Make love to you.’

  She stared at him helplessly.

  They landed on the lawn in front of the house a couple of hours later, and everyone was there to meet them, Cloris, the children and Rosemary.

  ‘I’m so, so sorry,’ Rosemary whispered to Arizona, but Declan immediately took charge of things as he picked Daisy up and hugged her then handed her to Arizona, saying, ‘If anyone’s interested in a joy flight over the ocean I’ve got a bit of time.’

  He didn’t have to make a second offer. Richard and Ben raced for the machine, as well as Sarah, although Daisy elected to stay with Arizona. And Rosemary urged those staying on the ground inside, saying she had a surprise, which took the form of a wedding present.

  ‘Oh, Rosemary!’ Arizona gasped.

  ‘Like it?’

  ‘It’s stunning!’

  It was, in fact, a full-size, black-faced, woolly, extremely lifelike sheep. ‘Not that easy to choose gifts for the very wealthy,’ Rosemary said wryly, ‘but it’s beautifully made by a little man who lives down the coast, and his work is starting to be highly sought. I’ll leave it up to you to find a spot for it,’ she added with a lurking grin.

  ‘Thanks, pal.’ Arizona kissed her warmly. ‘I think he’s beautiful. Why don’t we put him in the hall? Then he can greet everyone who comes to Scawfell. Daisy, darling, would you like to think of a name for him?’

  Daisy brightened and let go of Arizona’s hand for the first time. ‘Bendigo,’ she said promptly. ‘Can I have a ride on him?’

  ‘Bendigo,’ Rosemary and Arizona said together, and laughed.

  ‘Couldn’t have done better myself,’ Rosemary remarked.

  A little later, Cloris waylaid Arizona as she came in alone from farewelling Rosemary. Declan had been duly introduced to Bendigo then dragged off to the stables by the kids. And once Cloris had said again that she was so happy for Arizona, how right it all was, and so sorry she hadn’t been able to calm Daisy down the night before, she asked Arizona which bedroom she’d like her to prepare.

  Arizona frowned. ‘I don’t understand—anyway, Declan can’t stay tonight.’

  ‘I know, but Mr. Holmes told me that you—you and he—that is—’ Cloris blushed ‘—would be using a different bedroom. He brought down a bag of clothes and things and I just wondered where to put them.’

  ‘Oh, I see! Just leave them where they are for the time being, Cloris, until I have a moment to think about it,’ Arizona said brightly but feeling foolish underneath and thinking, Why does he do this to me?

  She was in her own bedroom when he came back from the stables, starting to unpack. He closed the door, looked at her profile then came over, wrested the bundle of clothes from her hands and took her in his arms. ‘Remember me?’ he queried quietly.

  ‘Declan—’

  ‘The man you slept with this morning?’ he persisted.

  ‘Declan, of course—’

  ‘And the way it was?’

  She quietened abruptly in his arms and felt a tide of colour creep up her throat. ‘Yes,’ she said huskily, and laid her brow on his shoulder as she was shaken by the most intimate memories.

  ‘But you’re angry with me again.’ He said it as a statement, not a question.

  She breathed in the heady masculine essence that went to make up Declan Holmes, felt the strength and hardness of his body even through his suit and said a little wearily, ‘No. I’m not.’

  ‘Arizona.’

  She raised her head and looked into his eyes and knew she would have to come up with some explanation because he could read her too well. ‘Cloris told me you wanted us to share another room.’

  He swore beneath his breath but said straightly, ‘Yes, I do. I didn’t expect her to tell you, though.’

  Arizona smiled sketchily. ‘I thought you might have known Cloris better than that by now.’

  He grimaced. ‘I will from now on. But I thought that that’s at least what you would want to do yourself—’

  ‘Declan,’ she interrupted, ‘Pete and I never used this room. It was to be my—retreat, and that’s what it was.’

  He frowned faintly, and she could see the ramifications of what she’d said going through his mind. She opened her mouth to add something, but a wariness that not even their magnificent lovemaking of that morning could altogether dispel made her stop and bite her lip.

  ‘Then there’s no problem, is there, Arizona?’ he said slowly. ‘So why are you upset?’

  ‘Because I can’t help wondering whether the shadow of Pete isn’t going to hang over us all the time.’

  He searched her eyes intently. ‘Because I didn’t want to use a bedroom you and he had used? I would have thought that was perfectly natural—’

  ‘Because it was his house, because—’ She broke off. ‘Do you really think I would have done that to you?’

  ‘I’ll tell you what I think,’ he murmured after a moment and cupped her face gently. ‘That we’re at cross-purposes for no good reason at the moment. Tell me something, would you mind me sharing your retreat with you?’

  ‘Oh… no.’

  ‘Then that’s resolved that,’ he said and kissed her. And she stood in the circle of his arms for a while longer until he took her hand and said, ‘I have to go. Coming to see me off?’

  ‘Yes. But not because I want to.’

  ‘I’ll be back as soon as I can, I promise you.’

  ‘Thanks.’

  ‘So, tell me all about married life,’ Rosemary said chattily on the veranda at Scawfell a fortnight later over a cup of coffee. The children were at school—Ben at his new school now—and Cloris could be heard humming in the kitchen. The old house drowsed in the sunlight and bees hummed in the flowerbeds below the veranda. The sea was an inky blue, and you could hear the surf below the cliff. Rosemary had called in on her way back from the village.

  Declan had been home four times in the past fortnight, but only for a night each time.

  ‘Married life?’ Arizona said, and added unguardedly, ‘well, we certainly don’t live in each other’s pockets.’

  Rosemary said after a moment, ‘He’s a very busy man, no doubt. It’s just a pity, I expect, that the kids depend so much on you, but that could improve.’

  ‘Oh, I don’t mind.’ Arizona recognized as soon as the words left her lips that she was trying to backpedal, and a glance at Rosemary revealed that she, too, thought the same.

  Damn, Arizona thought. Well, there’s only one thing to do and that’s soldier on. ‘I mean I don’t really think I’m cut out to be a tycoon’s wife, and I’d just as soon be here instead of jet-setting around the place.’

  ‘Besides which,’ Rosemary said energetically, ‘when you get to be married as long as I have, you don’t want to be living in each other’s pockets. How is Daisy?’

  ‘She’s fine. In fact they’re all benefiting from Declan even though he’s not here such a lot. But he seems to leave a presence behind him, of law and order—’ she grimaced ‘—and growing confidence that their lives aren’t going to be torn apart again.’

  ‘There you are then!’ Rosemary looked triumphant. ‘Before long you might be able to go on a delayed honeymoon. I was really so sorry I couldn’t calm Daisy that night, your
wedding night of all nights, but she was just inconsolable, absolutely distraught. You know, Arizona,’ she continued thoughtfully, ‘I don’t think any of us realized what you’ve had to cope with or just how marvellous you’ve been, and I have to tell you, with my famed delicacy, that a lot of us thought Pete might be doing the wrong thing when he married you.’

  ‘Thanks,’ Arizona said with irony.

  ‘Don’t hate me, darling.’

  ‘Rosemary, I don’t,’ Arizona said with a cross between a grin and a sigh.

  ‘Are you in love with Declan?’

  ‘Now, Rosemary, your famed delicacy has gone a little too far—’

  ‘It’s just that it’s a bit hard to tell with you, my pet.’

  Arizona paused, considered then said barely audibly, ‘A little too much perhaps.’

  ‘Do you think you can ever be too much in love with a man… who is also your husband?’ Rosemary queried after a long pause.

  ‘Yes, I’m afraid I do, but look—’ Arizona smiled with genuine humour then ‘—I’m probably a bit strange in these respects. Rosemary, seeing as you’re so well-named, would you like to see my rose garden? Declan sent me down twenty new varieties the other day.’

  Indeed, she thought as she worked in her rose garden that afternoon, Declan, who might only grace her bed from time to time, was certainly providing her with plenty to think about and plenty to do. Not only twenty new rosebushes to plant and plan for but plans for a glass-roofed conservatory to be added to the house, which he’d thought they might be able to use as a summer dining room as well and in which, he’d said, she could grow all sorts of exotic plants. It had been impossible to hide the quickening of interest this had aroused in her. He’d also taken her up on a chance remark that the cliff path down to the beach was a bit dangerous and sent a team of workmen down to cut some steps out and erect a handrail. And he’d asked her if she’d like the inside of the house repainted, and when she’d agreed that it did need it, had left the choosing of colour schemes, if she wanted to change anything, up to her. Added to this he’d insisted on hiring a gardener for her, to do all the heavy work and help her to implement all the ideas she had, and to occupy a vacant cottage in the grounds. A man who didn’t seem to have much feel for growing things, she thought once, but did have a passion for neatness and order and was extremely self-effacing. With the net result that the estate of Scawfell was starting to look its best.