Kingdom's Dream

by Iris Gower

  He resisted the temptation to pull her into his arms and kiss her full lips. ‘Of course it’s all right. You can knock on my door at any time.’

  He led her into the parlour and watched as she seated herself, carefully arranging her skirts around her small feet. ‘Does this mean you’re willing to try again, Katie? It’s so long since we’ve talked properly I thought you’d changed your mind about us.’

  ‘I had to have time to think things through,’ Katie said. ‘And I’m seeing things a little differently now, but I must ask, have you really finished with Rhiannon for good?’

  ‘We haven’t seen each other since she started work up at the Big House,’ Bull said. ‘She’ll tell you if you ask her – Rhiannon was never a liar.’

  ‘She’s told me that you and her are finished.’ Katie’s smile was tremulous. ‘She said one of us might as well be happy.’

  ‘That’s generous of her.’

  ‘It’s not only Rhiannon who’s made me see things differently,’ Katie said. ‘There was a bad row up at the house between Mr and Mrs Buchan, and I realized that no man is perfect.’ She smiled more confidently. ‘No woman either.’

  ‘So we’re walking out again, then?’

  ‘I suppose so.’

  ‘I won’t take liberties with you, Katie. I won’t push you into anything you don’t want.’

  ‘I know.’

  ‘Can you trust me now, Katie? I promise on my oath never to do anything to hurt you again.’

  ‘It looks like men think nothing of taking a mistress. Are you sure you won’t be like that, Bull? You won’t go running back to Rhiannon if we have a disagreement or something?’

  ‘Let me just prove it to you, Katie. I didn’t take any other woman the whole time I was with Rhiannon, and I admit I was wrong not to tell you about her straight off.’

  ‘I realized you needed a woman to care for you, to cook and wash your clothes and see to your comforts, but it never crossed my mind she’d share your bed.’ She looked down at her hands. ‘And when I saw Rhiannon, when I saw she was real flesh and blood and so beautiful, I was angry and jealous.’

  At her words Bull felt a thrill of pride: Katie was admitting that she had been jealous of Rhiannon, which showed she cared about him. ‘I promise I’ll never make you feel like that ever again.’

  Katie looked so demure, so untouched and somehow vulnerable sitting there with her skirts spread around her that Bull had to resist the temptation to grab her and shower her with kisses. ‘Shall we go for a walk?’ he asked tentatively. ‘It’s a lovely day.’

  ‘I’d like that.’ Katie rose to her feet with alacrity, and Bull knew she had been uncomfortable at being alone with him in his house.

  He felt ten feet tall as he walked down the broad, tree-lined street with Katie on his arm. She was so sweet, so tiny, and with her hair in shining curls beneath her hat, she was all he could ever want in life. She was a rare treasure, and he was so lucky to have her.

  ‘I’ll make you happy always, Katie,’ he said, and though he considered himself a strong man, he was surprised to find tears of happiness in his eyes.

  CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX

  Llinos watched, her heart thudding, as she saw her husband alight from a hansom cab outside the pottery buildings. He was thinner, his shoulders were stooped, and he looked like a sick old man. Then, as he came closer, she could see that his skin was golden, highlighted by the sun on the American plains. He still looked so handsome that her heart ached for what they had once been together: faithful lovers, devoted husband and wife.

  But that was before Joe’s squaw had come on the scene – Joe had been half in love with Sho Ka, though he never would admit it. Llinos knew she was not blameless either, for she had been besotted with Dafydd Buchan, but she had never loved him as she loved Joe. Perhaps even now it was not too late to make a fresh start.

  ‘Joe! It’s good to see you home again.’ She hugged him, and when she smelt his familiar scent she felt like a girl again. His lips lingered on hers for a long time, and then, arm in arm, they walked through the hall and into the drawing room.

  ‘Llinos, my beautiful girl, my little firebird, if only you knew how much I’ve longed to hold you like this.’ He kissed her properly now that they were alone, his lips hot. Joe was a passionate man, so how had he lived without her for all these long months?

  She held him away from her. ‘You didn’t console yourself with a young squaw, did you?’ She hated the suspicion that rose inside her like a snake, but somehow she felt the words had to be said.

  ‘I’m an old man now, Llinos.’ Joe had chosen to ignore her sharpness. ‘I have energy only for my wife.’ He kissed her again and she pressed herself to him, feeling the old magic his touch roused in her.

  ‘Joe, my darling, how did we let our love slip away from us?’ She rested her head on his shoulder. ‘We were meant for each other, why did we spoil it?’

  ‘Let’s forget the past, Llinos,’ Joe said softly. ‘We’re here together now so let’s enjoy each other. Come, sit down and let me tell you the news of our son.’

  ‘Is Lloyd happy?’ Llinos tried to keep the bitterness out of her voice. Joe should have brought him home so that he could tell her face to face that he was happy. ‘And is he well?’

  ‘He sends his love,’ Joe said. ‘I’ve brought you letters from him, and a drawing of Lloyd with his bride by one of the old braves. Lloyd is accepted as one of the tribe, and though I know it upsets you, you must believe he’s happy.’

  ‘That’s all I want for him, but I can’t help feeling I’ve lost him.’

  ‘No, you’ll never lose him. He’s your firstborn son.’

  His words were like a rebuke, even though he had not meant them that way. ‘How is Sion?’ The question was forced from him, and Llinos knew that the past still hurt him.

  ‘He is well, Joe. I enrolled him in a good school a month ago, and he writes to me every week.’

  Joe held her hand and kissed it but Llinos knew what he was thinking. ‘With him out of the way, you won’t be reminded of my infidelity, will you, Joe?’

  ‘I wasn’t going to speak of it but now you’ve brought the subject up I’d like to know if you’ve seen anything of Buchan while I’ve been away. I know he’s the boy’s father, but I can’t abide the thought of him being in my house.’

  Llinos pushed aside the old feelings of guilt. ‘Sion has known only one father and that’s you, Joe.’

  ‘You haven’t answered my question.’

  ‘I’ve seen little of Dafydd Buchan. He’s a married man,’ she frowned, ‘though it seems he has trouble remembering that. He’s been involved in a scandal and Jayne is bitterly hurt by it.’

  ‘What sort of scandal?’

  ‘The usual sort. He got Shanni Morgan with child. In a moment of madness the poor girl lost so much.’ Before Joe could speak Llinos held up her hands. ‘I know, that is exactly what I did, and I can see now how foolish I was. But please believe me when I say I can look at him now and feel nothing for him.’

  Joe smiled then. ‘You’ve never lied to me, Llinos, my love, and I know you wouldn’t start now.’

  ‘So can we make this a new beginning for us, Joe?’

  ‘I think we can, my little firebird.’ He took her hand and kissed it. ‘I might be getting on in years but you still have the power to move me, Llinos.’ He turned her hand over and nuzzled the softness of her palm. ‘And looking at you now, how beautiful you are, I know I’ve always loved you more than anyone else in the world.’

  He drew her close and Llinos vowed she would never do anything to hurt him again.

  Katie sat on the grass verge that ran along the edge of the bay and stared out at the ships in full sail. ‘Aren’t they beautiful?’ She glanced shyly at Bull. ‘With the sails bending to the wind they look like nuns bowing to their devotions before the altar.’

  Bull touched her hand lightly, and Katie allowed him to curl his fingers in hers. ‘It’s wonderful being here wi
th you, Bull, with the sun shining and the birds singing.’ Katie sighed. ‘I wish today could last for ever.’

  ‘Once we’re married, we’ll be together always, Katie.’ His voice was gruff and she knew he was as moved as she by the beauty of their surroundings. ‘I have to ask you something, Katie,’ Bull’s fingers tightened around hers, ‘and please don’t be angry, but how is Rhiannon settling into the job?’

  She felt as if a cold hand had touched her heart. ‘She seems to be well enough.’ She was aware of her icy tone, and so was Bull.

  ‘Katie, I love you so much, but I am still concerned about Rhiannon’s welfare.’

  ‘I know, and I do understand, but it hurts me to hear you talk about her.’

  Bull smiled. ‘And that makes me realize how much you care for me.’

  ‘And now I must be getting back to the Big House or I’ll be in trouble.’ She scrambled to her feet. ‘Cook’s waiting for the vegetables for tonight’s dinner. Mrs Buchan is coming over and her husband with her.’ She made a face, and glanced away from Bull to hide her blush. ‘I can’t forget the row they had the other day. It was awful.’ She paused. ‘Though I suppose it’s no concern of mine what they do.’ She smoothed the creases from her skirt. ‘I can understand Mrs Buchan being hurt, though,’ she said. ‘Her husband was unfaithful and they haven’t been married all that long.’

  ‘Don’t let it upset you, Katie. The gentry look after their own and tonight everyone will act as though nothing is wrong, you’ll see.’

  He stood up, brushed the sand from his clothes and held out his hand to her. ‘Come on, then. Let me walk you home. Every minute I spend with you is precious to me, Katie.’

  They stood close together for a moment, and Bull looked down at her, his eyes alight with love. ‘Can I kiss you, Katie?’

  ‘You can kiss my cheek,’ she said playfully, but Bull took her seriously.

  He stood for a moment, not looking at her, and then, just when Katie was thinking she had offended him, he smiled. ‘You little tease.’ He took her in his arms and kissed her gently at first but then with growing passion. Katie felt breathless and wanted the moment to go on and on, but at last she pushed him away. ‘I must watch my manners and remember what a nice, respectable girl you are, Katie,’ he said, with a twinkle in his eye.

  ‘Now who’s teasing?’ Katie giggled.

  They fell into step, Bull measuring his tread to hers. ‘You’re such a tiny thing,’ he said softly, ‘so fragile, so different from Rhiannon I’m afraid I’ll crush you.’

  ‘I’m a woman, Bull,’ Katie said, ‘and the only way you’ll hurt me is if you keep on talking about Rhiannon.’ Her voice was sharper than she intended and Bull looked at her quickly. He was smiling.

  ‘It’s not funny!’ Katie said, though an answering smile tugged at the corners of her mouth. ‘Stop laughing at me, Bull.’

  ‘I’m smiling because you’re jealous,’ Bull said, ‘and I’m flattered.’

  She looked up at him, so strong, so wonderful . . . then stood on tiptoe and, to the surprise of them both, she planted a kiss on his lips. They were both silent, laughter gone as they gazed at each other.

  ‘Oh, Katie!’ Bull groaned. ‘I love you so very much.’ He would have kissed her again but she lifted her skirts and ran across the grass to the Big House. At the gates, she stopped to look at Bull, who was still watching her. She waved, resisting the urge to run back and kiss him again. If this was love it made her breathless.

  As she entered the house and made her way to the kitchen the smell of roasting meat and freshly baked bread made her feel hungry.

  ‘So you’ve decided to come back home, then, have you, Katie?’ Mrs Grinter said. ‘I suppose you think those vegetables are going to peel themselves while you dally around doing goodness knows what.’

  ‘Sorry, Cook, I saw Bull and we stopped for a minute to have a chat.’

  ‘I’d guessed that much from the light in your eye and the colour in your cheeks. I hope you’re acting like a good Catholic girl should.’

  ‘I don’t know what you mean.’ Katie was aware that Rhiannon was watching her.

  ‘You didn’t allow him any liberties, did you?’

  ‘Well, no, I suppose not.’

  ‘What do you mean by that?’ Cook put a pie in the oven and closed the door before she looked up at Katie.

  ‘Well, I did allow him a kiss.’

  Rhiannon gave a little laugh. ‘Bull Beynon isn’t one to be satisfied with that for long, I can tell you.’

  ‘Well, that’s as may be,’ Cook said, ‘but I dare say a body can’t come to much harm out there in broad daylight. Come on, then, give Rhiannon the vegetables and then you should be getting upstairs to see what the master wants. Mrs Buchan’s coming tonight and the master’s always in a funny mood when she brings her husband into the house and I don’t blame him.’

  ‘They stick together, though, the gentry,’ Rhiannon said. ‘It’s all right for a so-called gentleman to take a woman, and it’s the woman who gets the blame every time. Men are such weak creatures.’

  ‘Mind, now, miss!’ Cook said. ‘Who are you to pass judgement on your betters?’

  ‘Only speaking my mind, Cook,’ Rhiannon said defiantly.

  ‘A word of warning, girl, just watch who you speak your mind to. I’m telling you that for your own good.’

  It was with relief that Katie left the kitchen and climbed the short flight of steps to the hallway. Rhiannon’s cold stare was unnerving, and it was clear to her that they could never be friends.

  She stood in the sunlit hall looking at the patterns the stained-glass windows cast on the polished floor and smiled. Bull was hers now, and she would make sure he stayed hers.

  Jayne climbed into the carriage and sat as far away from Dafydd as she could.

  ‘Do we have to visit your father yet again?’ he said sullenly. ‘You’re like a child running home to Daddy at every whip stitch.’

  ‘Did you have to choose Shanni Morgan?’ The words burst out of her.

  Dafydd looked at her coldly. ‘I don’t see that who I bed is any of your concern any more. If my wife refuses me no one can blame me for wanting other women. And I’ll wager that every man in Swansea would agree with me, even your beloved father.’

  ‘That’s unfair!’ Jayne said. ‘You slept with that – that whore when we were leading a normal married life. You can’t start blaming me for what you did.’

  ‘You were never responsive to me, Jayne. Have you asked yourself why I sought the company of another woman?’

  ‘Oh, so it’s my fault now, is it?’

  ‘I suppose it is.’

  ‘Well, your love-making left a lot to be desired. How would you like it if I found another man?’

  ‘You won’t do that, Jayne, you’re far too interested in your own reputation to risk losing it.’

  He was right, and Jayne knew that she would not risk the scorn of her peers for any man.

  ‘Then I can well do without the quick fumble to which you subjected me.’

  ‘You only say that because you feel insulted that I turned to another woman.’

  ‘And you have an over-inflated idea of your prowess. Believe me, Dafydd, I don’t want you in my bed and I never did. Our love-life was a disappointment to me from the beginning.’

  ‘And your performance, in comparison with other women’s, failed miserably.’

  The carriage jerked to a halt and Jayne tried to calm the anger that filled her, but in that moment she hated Dafydd. ‘By the way,’ she said, as she alighted, ‘I’ve managed to get hold of some more shares in the railway.’ She smiled. ‘It seems I’m better at business than you are, my dear husband.’

  Dafydd frowned as he followed her into her father’s house. ‘Now,’ she said, pausing, ‘we will behave as though nothing is wrong, shall we?’ She was talking to Dafydd as if he was a child, but to her surprise he nodded.

  ‘If this evening is to be endured I’ll play any part you like
, even that of a devoted husband.’

  Jayne looked at him and saw a handsome man, but a flawed one. She did not love him, probably had never loved him. Well, she had made her vow of chastity and would keep it.

  Katie was in the hall ready to take the coats and she bobbed a curtsey, but Jayne scarcely noticed her. With her head held high, she made her way across the hall and into the drawing room, where her father was waiting. ‘Jayne, my dear child, you’re looking remarkably well.’ Eynon kissed her.

  ‘I am well indeed, Father.’ She brushed aside the fringe of hair that fell over his forehead. ‘You need your hair cut. Why don’t you get a good woman to look after you?’

  Before her father could reply the door opened and Llinos Mainwaring entered the room on the arm of her husband. Jayne winced at the irony as she watched her father kiss Llinos’s cheek and shake hands with Joe. The talk was general, though Jayne noticed that Dafydd spoke scarcely a word. She wondered if he was aware that his presence was unwelcome. Somehow, she doubted it.

  Later, at supper, Jayne found herself beside Llinos. When the meal was over and the women withdrew she would have an opportunity to tell Llinos what a fool she had been ever to let Dafydd into her life. It was with false cheerfulness that she sat through the meal and talked and laughed. But her mind was racing and anger took away her appetite. Dafydd didn’t notice: he was playing his part of happy husband to perfection. What a hypocrite he was. Looking at him now, she could see beneath his good looks and assured charm to the weak, foolish man she knew him to be.

  CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN

  Eynon was sitting in the sunlit window of the library with a book on his knee but he was not reading: he was thinking about Dafydd Buchan. The advice he’d given Jayne was sound: unless she turned a blind eye to her husband’s moral lapses she would make a show of herself throughout Swansea. But he would not let the insult to his family pass without punishing Buchan.

  He would have liked to damage the man financially but that seemed impossible: his business ventures were sound as a rock. Perhaps a good beating would make him regret hurting the daughter of Eynon Morton-Edwards.