The Bare Necessities (Non-Profane Edition)

by John Harding

  “What's up?” Paige asked as she took her friend into her bedroom. Hazel looked down from the top bunk as she tore her eyes away from a magazine and Claire took a deep breath.

  “Andre wants us to go clothed,” Claire blurted out. “I mean, all the time, so I told him the deal's off.”

  “OK,” Paige said and looked at her friend. “What now?”

  “I was thinking as I came over here, why don't we just do it ourselves. I mean, all the agents we have spoken to have been useless. We got the first two gigs ourselves.”

  Paige nodded. “Yeah, well, it's the Summer. Must be loads of stuff out there.”

  “Yeah, that's what I was thinking,” Claire replied. “I've spoken to Jack and he says we can go on tour if you can. A couple of weeks, maybe three, and he can drive us and … what do you think?”

  Paige beamed. “Yeah. We can use our big tent,” she enthused. “Mum won't mind.” Paige's eyes twinkled and she stretched. “Just one condition, we play everywhere naked.”

  “Of course,” Claire replied. “I kinda knew that.”

  * * * * *

  “Jack! Jack! Get down here now!”

  “What?” Jack moaned and sidled down the stairs at a leisurely pace. His father sat in the front room with a newspaper on his knee and stared at his son as he came into the room.

  “What did I tell you about that Baynes girl?” Jack bit his lip and looked at his sister smiling on a leather chair opposite. “Well?”

  Jack shrugged. “Told me not to get involved,” he added. “And I haven't.”

  “Oh no?” He asked. “Think again.”

  “I haven't. Claire and I are not an item or will ever be one.” He glanced over at his sister and bit his lip as he pondered what Harriet had told his parents. “Sure, we made a bit of music together, but that's it. She doesn't even like me like that.”

  The veins in the neck of Paul Rees-Montague bulged. “Then why the bloody hell were you naked with her then. And what the devil is it doing on the Internet? And who the hell is that at the front?” Paul yelled, and got up from the chair. He jabbed his finger into the shoulder of Jack and passed him a tablet computer from the folds of his newspaper.

  Jack simpered; he had not seen the video on the Internet and he watched for a moment as Paige delivered a fantastic solo. “It's Paige, she can't sing with her clothes on.”

  “What the hell has this got to do with you?”

  “You bought me a studio. You encouraged me to form a band, so I have done. And Paige is the best singer this side of the river.”

  “Poppycock,” his father cried and looked at his son. “She's flashed her bits at you, and all of the known world and you've fallen for it. She's a slut, a tart, a …”

  Jack pushed his father onto his chair and raised his fist. “Don't you say that about her.”

  “Oh great. So you're in love with her. That's all we need.”

  “I'm not. She's just … a talented singer. And I enjoy making music with her.”

  “You are naked. Have some pride, man. Real men don't go wandering around indecent. Pull yourself together.”

  “It's my summer, it's my life,” Jack told him forcefully. “It makes me happy. We've had agents from some big agencies come to talk to us, and we filled out pubs and …”

  “You did what? On Monday you start at the factory with me,” the businessman ordered. “That'll stop this nonsense. And if you are not at work on the Monday, I shall confiscate your car and your recording studio.

  “But …”

  “That's it, you start work on Monday at 8am. You hear? Why can't you be like your sister?”

  Jack seethed and glared at the smirking Harriet peering at him. “Because I am not that evil.”

  * * * * *

  “Jack! Jack!” Claire cried as her friend joined her in the little deli where she worked. It was her day off, but it was a good place to meet, especially as Claire made them free drinks when the manager wasn't looking, and the weary face of Jack looked across at Paige and Claire talking animatedly. “Jack, listen to this.”

  “Listen to what?”

  “I left you a message, did you get it?”

  “No. But we have …”

  “Well I went and did his job. I've got us a twelve-date tour in the West Country starting in a couple of days. Some of them are no money, but all pay expenses and most are at sites, and we get free accommodation.”

  “And we are going to use the big tent my parents use,” Paige added. “But a few we are getting fees for.”

  “It was simple really. I just had to point them towards our videos, and they were all delighted for us to come. And happy that we sing naked.”

  “Isn't this … so exciting?”

  “Sit down,” Claire moaned. “Standing there.”

  “I can't do this any more,” Jack told the two girls, and they stared at him. “My parents know. My sister told them.”

  “Well, so what?” Paige asked.

  “You don't get it. I've been told to have nothing to do with you.”

  “So? Are you really going to listen?”

  “Well … they are my parents,” Jack replied. “I sort of have to. I can't ignore them.”

  Paige ran her hands through her hair and shook her head. “You said you felt an enjoyment when you did this. Was that a lie?”

  “No!”

  “You said you wanted to help me, was that a lie?”

  “No!”

  “Then why is it, when we are about to do something truly incredible. A road trip: doing gigs twelve nights in twenty. Seeing the country. And you bottle it?”

  “You've not met my parents.”

  Paige sighed. “OK. I'll meet them, and I'll tell them what I think.”

  “No!”

  “Why are you so scared of them?”

  Jack rubbed his nose. “You don't know them. No-one goes up against my father and wins. No-one. He's ruthless. And I don't want to be that person. And I certainly don't want you to be that person because he'll destroy you. It's off. I'm sorry.”

  Paige pushed away from the table, and Jack flinched. “I knew it. I knew I couldn't trust you. I asked you when we started, and you promised me.”

  “Well that was before you started insisting on doing everything naked. There's a reason why nobody else does it.”

  “Yeah, I know that. And I know it's a problem. But you …” She sneered down her nose at him. “You. You're weak. No, you're worse than that. You're pathetic. And that's a much bigger problem!”

  “Paige!” Jack shouted, and the tearful girl turned as she reached the door. “Paige! I'm sorry.”

  “Yeah. And I'm sorry you haven't got the balls to be a man.”

  * * * * *

  “You can't expect me not to say anything. You were going to bring plebs into our family. Dirty, slutty girls. I didn't want it, and Mum and Dad didn't want it.” Jack ignored her, and she cooed sweetly. “I know you aren't happy, but you'll thank me for it.”

  “You did it out of spite. You couldn't bear to see me happy.” Harriet cackled, and she shook her head.

  “Oh, big brother. Is that what you think of me?”

  “I know you have secrets, and I don't tell on you.”

  “Like what?”

  “Like … everything!” Jack shouted. “Like you sneaking off last year to go to that party with your boyfriend. Like setting fire to next door's bush. Like …”

  “Prove it.”

  Jack got up from his bed and his eyes narrowed. His arms moved wildly as he spoke venomously and angrily towards his younger sister. “I loved being in that band. It made me happy. And you had to spoil it for me. Well now, that's it. The gloves are off. If I find anything about you that I shouldn't, I'm going to use it against you. I am going to be so nasty, 'cause I hate you. I really hate you. Now do one and don't speak to me again.”

  Harriet laughed. “Hey, but at least it's not me that's the disappointment any more.” She grinned as Jack slammed his bedroom door c
ausing it to splinter. “See ya later, bro!” Harriet called from the other side of the bedroom door.

  Chapter XIII

  “I don't believe him,” Paige shouted as she walked up and down the station platform. “He is such a Mummy's boy. And he's ruined everything.”

  “I'm sorry, Paige.”

  “It's not your fault. It's that privileged prat's fault. Why did I trust him? I knew something wasn't right.”

  “I introduced you to him. I mean, I thought he is nice enough, but that family only ever think of themselves. I thought he was different, but I guess …”

  “No, he bloody wasn't.” Paige kicked a discarded juice carton across the platform to bounce over the white line and onto the track, and she yelled. “How can he be so selfish? He promised us.”

  “It's the upper class,” Claire replied angrily. “They think they are above everyone, don't they?”

  “Yes. And I hate him. I want to meet him on a dark night now,” she shouted and stormed back to the metal chairs where Claire was sat. She gestured angrily with her hands as she spoke. “And I want to pummel his face. I want to hurt him so much.”

  “Easy, Paige.”

  “He has ruined it. I thought, after my school talent show, when I just froze a few seconds in that I wouldn't sing in public again. Sure, there was the odd karaoke, but that didn't count, I mean singing to people. And then I met you and Jack. And that gig at the pub in the evening. With the birds and the trees. And all I thought was how I never wanted that day to end. I thought we would have loads of those.” She shook her head and Claire rubbed her brow.

  “Maybe we could get another keyboard player?”

  “No. It wouldn't be the same. Jack's ruined it. I thought we had something. I didn't care if we didn't make it big, I just loved the band and what we did. It felt incredible.”

  “What about the agents we saw. One of them wanted you to split from us, why not give them a ring?”

  “Because it won't be the same,” Paige snapped. “I wanted … this,” she said firmly. “I wanted it to be fun. If the Bare Necessities are over then it's … it's over.” She looked at her friend who hummed.

  “Maybe you will think differently in the morning.” Their conversation was halted by a train arriving at the platform, and the two girls travelled in silence.

  Claire got off the train before Paige and promised the miserable singer that she would ring while Paige got to walk home, lost in her own thoughts.

  “You look as miserable as I do,” Hazel told her sister as Paige opened the door and the elder sibling grunted as she slouched onto the bed. “You need to talk?”

  “No,” Paige muttered as tears filled her eyes. She sniffed, and her sister looked up from the laptop to see Paige turn to face the wall.

  “Paige, what's happened?” Hazel asked in a concerned voice.

  Paige sniffed again and then burst into sobs. “I should be packing,” she cried. “My band was going on tour, but we've been abandoned.” Hazel gulped as Paige burst into tears, telling Hazel how Jack had betrayed them, and the young girl sat on the bed and put her arms around her.

  Hazel listened as Paige recounted the previous two hours and then nodded in agreement. “He's a bastard,” Hazel agreed with her. “To do that, just as Claire got all the bookings.”

  Paige shrugged. “I know. I know I shouldn't have trusted him. I asked him before the agents came to see us, 'what happens if your family find out' and he was, all like, yeah I can handle it but he just lied.”

  “Then go on tour without him. Just go.”

  “We can't drive,” Paige cried. “Or have the music equipment. It's over. Claire said she will cancel them all tomorrow, we aren't going. I s'pose I better go find myself a proper job,” Paige mused. “Dad's been on at me to find a job so I s'pose I better go to the Job Centre.”

  “But at least you get to stay with me,” Hazel said with a smile. “I sort of feel that I've missed my sister for the last few months.” Paige's face flickered slightly, and Hazel cocked her head. “That song. Seeing that song performed and knowing you wrote it about me. Well it made me realise how much I do have someone who loves me, and I think it's helped. Really helped.”

  Paige snorted and dried her eyes. “Good.”

  “And I have a CD of that music. It helps when I feel … low.”

  “Good,” Paige smiled. “At least the little bastard did some good then.”

  “But not for you,” Hazel muttered and the two sisters hugged tightly.

  “Doesn't matter,” Paige lied and sniffed as she held Hazel. “I'll be all right tomorrow. And he better hope that I never see him again.”

  * * * * *

  “Happy Jack left town ages ago,” the female voice told him. “What does Aunty need to do to bring him back.”

  “You can give me some of that whisky in your hand,” Jack snorted as his aunt entered the reception room in his studio. He turned to face her, and she held up a bottle.

  “Vodka,” she replied and sat down opposite him. “You were close. But no cigar. I saw that video.”

  “Oh. So you come to bollock me.”

  Lucinda cackled. “When have I ever done that?” Her eyes sparkled and she leant back in the chair, pointing towards him. “Well once, when you were fourteen and drank my port without sharing.” Jack's face flickered and Lucinda took a swig from the bottle. “I know what it's about, tell me about them.”

  “What Claire and Paige? They were fantastic.”

  “Are fantastic,” Lucinda corrected him. “They're not dead, so they are fantastic.”

  “OK,” he snapped. “They are fantastic. They had a friendship, a partnership that was just brilliant. And I got to be part of that.” His red eyes looked at his father's little sister. “It was great. It made me happy.”

  “Yeah, I could tell. You were smiling in that video. And that Paige, awesome voice.”

  “I know. And they are going on tour. If Harriet could have kept her mouth shut for two more days, I'd be all over the country going gigs. With them.”

  “And you wanted to go with 'em?”

  Jack snorted. “Yeah. Of course. It made me happy. Alive. Like nothing I've ever felt. Incredible. It was just … me.”

  “Then go,” Lucinda suggested forcefully. “Who cares what your father says?”

  “I can't.”

  “You mean, you won't. You can if you want. It's only fear holding you back. He only has a hold over you 'cause you're scared of him. Sod 'im. He's nothing but a joyless bully. The sooner you realise that he only has the power over you, you choose to give him, the quicker you'll break free. He has this reputation of being all-conquering but it's bollocks.” Her eyes twinkled. “I know how much you like your group. You've had a spring in ya step since I saw you with 'em.”

  Jack gulped. “But what about his threats?”

  “Take your car or studio from you? He hasn't got the time and if you run away he can't take the car away. What else? You think he'll cut you out of the family firm?” Lucinda giggled. “A few trips 'round the country won't make him do that. And anyway, I own 50% of it after our Mum died. Why do you think he can't bully me? I let him run it because I don't want the hassle, but he knows if he upsets me, I will walk in there and mess with it. I've done it once before, and he hated me for it.”

  Jack looked at her as she took a gulp from the vodka. “So. What? Just leave?”

  “Yeah!”

  “They stormed away from me two hours ago,” Jack told her. “They'll be cancelling the gigs now.”

  “Then ring them and stop them,” Lucinda shouted at him. “Do you want this? If you want it, work for it.” Her eyes narrowed. “If I get Paul and Anne and your bloody sister out for an hour or two at a restaurant tonight, will that be enough time for my favourite nephew do a runner and leave a note.”

  “He'll … he'll lose it.”

  “I hope so,” Lucinda smiled. “I bloody hope so.” Her eyes fell to the floor. “There was a day when he wasn't like t
his. He used to be … fun. And then our dad beat it out of him. And he's been a bit of a twat ever since.” She rubbed the bridge of her nose. “I still love him, he's my brother, but that doesn't stop me from thinking he's a prat.”

  “But …”

  “Just go and enjoy yourself,” Lucinda told him as she got up. “Oh, and you have a tummy ache which is why you can't come to the restaurant.” Jack bit his lip through his smile as he looked at the floor, and then looked up at his aunt. “There are plenty of things that make your miserable in this world. It's important to relish the things that don't. I just wish someone would teach that to my damn brother!”