by Ashley Cruse
Without hesitation, I grabbed my Manolo shades and walked out the front door. I decided to go to the salon to get a back rub, a manicure, and a pedicure. I called my cousin to see what she was doing. She was just getting home from the bakery, and she agreed to meet me at Vendettas Salon and Day Spa.
She pulled up behind me at the salon within minutes of my arrival there. We used to do things like this all the time a few years back. That was before I had figured out she was a drug addict. I knew she didn’t smoke it at all anymore. And if she did, then it wasn’t hardly as much as she used to. I guessed I wouldn’t put it past her if she did smoke every once in a while.
My cousin walked in the salon, looking incredible. She had her blue jean capris on with a Chanel tube top shirt. She had straightened her hair, and her long blond and red-streaked locks gleamed radiantly against her smooth light skin. We waited for five minutes, chatting like two teenage girls, before they called us back.
We relaxed in the salon and were pampered for a good hour and a half. When we were done, Victoria had to go run some errands. I decided to go to Whataburger to get something to eat before I picked my little boy up. I wanted to enjoy the feeling after that good rubdown I had just had.
When I pulled up to the Whataburger on First Street, I saw that the drive-through line was too long. I parked my truck in the parking lot and headed inside to place my order. I was the third person in line when I walked in. Right when I was placing my order, I noticed out of the corner of my eye that Drew, Bruce, and Bruce’s wife were walking in. I instantly froze up. Then I shook it off. I opted to pretend as if I didn’t see them.
I paid for my order and walked over to the soda fountain and filled my cup up with orange soda. When I turned around, Bruce was ordering his food. His wife was standing beside him like an obedient guard dog. Drew was heading toward me. Before I could say hi, he gave me a big ole hug. It was unexpected and a nice gesture. I had to admit I was cheesing at this point.
“How are you doing, Doll?” His handsome smile hypnotized me for a brief second, but I shook that off and smiled back.
“Just great. Just enjoying my afternoon off.”
We stood around and chatted for a bit. They called my number, and I grabbed my to-go bag and drink and said my good-byes. It wasn’t until I had got in my truck and had pulled out of the parking lot that it dawned on me how odd Bruce and his girl had been acting. Normally, Bruce would say hi, but he hadn’t this time. Usually, his girl would speak too, but Justine hadn’t said anything. She’d looked a little nervous. How weird was that?
I pulled up to my house and grabbed my food and drink. I walked around to the backyard so I could eat my food on the patio. I decided to not dwell on Bruce’s and Justine’s odd behavior, even though it was kind of messed up that they hadn’t acknowledged me. It kind of pissed me off. I had always spoken to that man when I saw him. I made a mental note to bring up his behavior the next time I saw him. I had thought we were better than that, but it was all good.
As I finished my hamburger, an unknown number called my cell. I declined the call. I leaned back in the lawn chair I was sitting in. It was very nice outside. There weren’t any flies buzzing around. The temperature was perfect. Not too hot or too cold. Just nice. Right then my phone rang again. The same number popped up. I forwarded the call to my voice mail once again. Immediately after that, the phone rang again. This time I answered; then I took a drink of my soda.
“What’s up, baby?” Corey was on the other end.
What the fuck? I was still mad at him. Very, very mad. But the sound of his voice filled my heart with this amazingly crazy feeling. A huge part of me was ready to reconcile, work through the mess, and put it behind us. I wanted to move forward with him.
“Where you at?” I demanded. I had to focus on being upset so I wouldn’t let my joy show through.
“Damn. No ‘I love you’? No callin’ me baby today?”
“I said, ‘Where you are?’” I questioned.
“I’m over here, at my aunt Torie’s. My cell phone died. I need a new charger.” When I didn’t reply, he continued on. “We need to talk.”
“You damn right we do. I just ain’t sure what I want to do, so I just need more time to speak.” Before Corey could reply, I kept going. “I came to visit you in jail, and I put money on your books. We were becoming so close. Then your sister says one thing, and you start trippin’. One fucking thing. Maybe our bond wasn’t as tight as I thought it was. Or maybe deep down inside, you didn’t want this like I did. That’s why your ass believed her so easily. ”
“Say, she ain’t the only one who said that,” Corey said, defending his sister.
“Who said it, then, Corey? Where is all this bullshit coming from? Who is the person?”
“You know who the person is!” he yelled.
Was he trying me right now? My stomach was turning. I was beginning to fill up with anger again. How dare this piece of shit call me and still not be able to come up with a name?
“Who is it?” I demanded again.
“The streets is talking, Dollie. Stop trying to play innocent.”
“Oh, so now the streets are talking, but there ain’t no fuckin’ name of the person I was supposedly fuckin’ with? They couldn’t say hello when you were in jail? But they want to deliver some fuckin’ news about me now? Real nice, Corey. Fuck you and the streets.” I hung up on him.
Suddenly, I wasn’t in the mood to eat the rest of my fries. I sat there for a minute, going over the argument in my head. I took a glimpse at the time on my phone. It was getting close to the time I had to go get my son. I carried my food to the Dumpster, chucked it, and then took off to the day care.
When I got there, instead of going to get my son, I headed straight to my aunt’s office. My aunt Audrina was having a conversation over the phone that sounded somewhat important. But when she saw the look on my face, she advised the person she was speaking to that she’d call him or her back. She hung up the phone, with no questions asked.
“Oh, mija. Que está pasando?”
I wasn’t no genius in Spanish, but I knew enough little shit to understand the simple things my aunt would say. She had said this same thing throughout my younger years. I knew exactly what she was saying. I stole one look at my aunt’s alarmed face and burst into tears.
She motioned for me to take a seat, and then she quietly got up and left her office, closing the door behind her. I didn’t mind being left alone at all. I needed to get these tears out, though. She returned fifteen minutes later. She gave me a big hug and rubbed the back of my neck.
“I told Ms. Kayla that you were here. I made Drake a bowl of banana pudding, so he can eat while we talk.”
I reached over for a Kleenex and wiped my nose. I told her what had happened, starting with the weekend at Corey’s mom’s down to our last conversation. I was pretty sure she already knew about it. Victoria couldn’t hold hot water at all. She had to tell somebody. I had known better before even saying anything to Victoria, but I’d had to get it out. I’d had to let somebody know my suffering.
“If he feels that negatively, Doll, let him go,” my aunt said. Her voice was stern yet loving. “You are too beautiful to go through this. I don’t understand why you young girls put yourselves through all this nonsense. Life is too short for this.”
“I don’t get it, Aunt Audrina. Why is he acting like that? If he doesn’t want me, why can’t he be a man, instead of playing with my head? I feel so stupid for wasting my time on that boy.”
My aunt shook her head at me. “You’re not stupid. God put you through this for a reason. If anybody is making a mistake, baby girl, it’s him. God don’t like ugly. Trust me on that. Whatever he puts out there has to come back to him sooner or later.”
Her words were comforting. She was all I had to go to for wisdom, since my mother was no longer around. I appreciated my aunt for taking the time out to listen to me. Especially when she had a business to run and other things to ten
d to. We talked for a few more minutes, and then I kissed my aunt good-bye.
Before I left, I went to pick up my son. Luckily for me, he had finished his pudding. We left, and I took him straight to my aunt and uncle’s house. I didn’t take him by the bakery, because he still had a few cookies left from the batch that Victoria had made.
My uncle Justin was already there and was in the backyard, firing up the pit. I quickly went and cleaned up my face. I put some Visine in my eyes to hide the redness. I hated having talks with my uncle. He lectured me too much. I knew my aunt would tell him what was going on with me, but he’d say what he had to say to her, and that would be that.
I played with my son for an hour and a half in the den. When my aunt arrived, Drake headed over to her. Drake and my aunt were really close. He was also close to his grandma, his dad’s mom.
Drake’s dad had passed away after a bad car accident when I was seven months pregnant. So, all that Drake’s paternal grandma had left of her own son was her grandson, my son. He was the closest thing to her son she and I had left. I would never deprive her of the chance to spend time with her grandson. She generally picked him up on the holidays and every other weekend, if her job allowed. She worked for an advertising firm, so whenever she had a day off, Drake was with her.
My aunt scooped up Drake and walked into the backyard to greet my uncle. Right then, my phone rang again. Before checking to see who was calling, I answered it absentmindedly. It was Corey again.
“I don’t want to talk right now, Corey—” I began to say, but he interrupted me.
“But listen to me, Dollie—”
I hung up the phone. For thirty minutes straight he called me nonstop. Every time I forwarded his call, he’d start right back up. I gave in. I completely caved in.
“Damn! What do you want?” I yelled into the phone.
“Say, man, just come outside.”
I hung up the cell phone and ran to the front door, hoping my aunt and uncle wouldn’t see me. I was furious that he would just come over without asking me if it was okay. When I got outside, Corey was standing by the truck. A wave of confusion came over me. I walked around to the edge of the yard and looked down the street.
“How’d you get here?” I turned around as I walked in his direction.
He shrugged his shoulders and looked at me. “One of the homies dropped me off. What’s up, man?”
I looked down at the grass and shook my head. This was unbelievable. I didn’t know what to make of all of this. I knew I wanted these ill feelings I was having to leave me. If that meant saying good-bye to him, then so be it. But having this man stand before me pulled on my heartstrings. I really, really wanted to make shit work. The real question was, did he?
“Let’s just put all this shit behind us. I really need to use the truck, though. Some shit went down between me and my pops. I’m having to stay with Drew’s sister, Tenosha, until I can find some place to go. You need to get a house, baby. Real talk,” Corey aid.
I glared at him, stared blankly. I didn’t understand why he would have to leave his grandma’s house. He and his dad had had an argument? Okay. Cool. Corey was hardly there, anyway, during the day. He could easily avoid his dad by only sleeping there at night, like he’d been doing. I didn’t see how they could have been arguing so bad that he just had to leave. Why did this story not sit well with me?
“You left your grandma’s?” I was really smelling bullshit written all over this.
“You know me and my pops don’t get along. He was tripping, so I had to drop his ass. He called my PO on me and everything.”
“But for what? What were you arguing about, though?”
For every question I asked, he gave me an answer. I wasn’t 100 percent satisfied with what he was dishing out. I had to learn to trust him again. I pulled my keys out of my pocket and asked him when he would bring the truck back. He told me that it would not be until much later, but he’d call my cell. He gave me a quick kiss and took off in my truck.
Chapter 18
Corey had been using my truck more often. He’d used it while I was at work, and sometimes, he’d kept it overnight. I had started to realize that our relationship was changing. Our conversations were short and simple now. And we had completely stopped having sex. I was beginning to think that he was cheating on me, but I couldn’t figure out with whom.
A couple of days ago, Corey and I had ended up having an argument about him not filling the truck up with gas after he used it. It had ended with me telling him that I would not let him use the truck any longer. I hadn’t called Corey since the argument. Even though I was mad at him, he was still on my mind a lot. Although he had been treating me badly, I was still in love with him. I wasn’t ready to say good-bye to him, let alone move on to another man, but I knew I had to do it. I just needed to break through that feeling of attachment and let him go. I had to admit that a part of me really didn’t want anybody else to have him.
It was a Wednesday, and my son was with his grandma for the week. She had taken him to a family reunion in Alabama. At work, Tammy invited me to go to a place called the Pub, which was a bar and grill. Wednesday night was ladies’ night, and they had great drink specials for women, so I agreed to go. Tammy was going to pick me up at my place at eight.
Since Tammy and I were going out tonight, Jerry agreed to let us come in at noon tomorrow. He was going to be at the office in the morning, and he was sure he could manage the phone without us. Since I knew I didn’t have to come in until noon tomorrow, I pushed myself extra hard to get tomorrow morning’s work done. That left me with the peace of mind that came from knowing I wouldn’t have too much to catch up on. Plus, my boss wouldn’t have to do too much of my job for me.
After work, I went home to get ready to go out. I curled my hair and let the curls fall gracefully down my back. I lightly applied some makeup on my face, and a dash of J.Lo’s Glow perfume behind my ears and knees and on my wrists. I put on a white halter dress that showed off my curvy, small body. I slipped into some red heels and attached red hoop earrings to my ears. Then I put a red clip in my hair. By eight o’ clock, I was ready to go, and Tammy was outside in her Beamer, waiting on me.
I hurried down the hall. I passed by the kitchen and heard a long whistle. It was my aunt giving me her signature stamp of approval. I posed, as if I was having my picture taken. Then I kissed my aunt good-bye and headed out the door.
“Girl, you look sexy!” Tammy growled at me from her car as I approached.
“You don’t look too bad yourself, beautiful!” I complimented her back as I slid into the passenger seat.
Tammy did look wonderful, as always. She had on a black, short-sleeved cashmere shirt and a pair of white skinny jeans. She wore black heels, and a string of white beads hung around her neck. She also had on some green contacts, which stood out against her fiery red hair.
We pulled up at the Pub within minutes. The parking lot was halfway full. We parked, went inside, and immediately headed toward the bar. We both got a glass of Hennessy and Coke. I also took a bottle of Corona, and Tammy got a bottle of Miller Light.
We headed to a table toward the back, where the grill was. Within minutes, our table was surrounded by potential bachelors, guys who had girlfriends, and playboys. I had to admit, Tammy and I were having so much fun that the liquor soon made me forget all about my boy problems.
One of the guys brought us some nachos to eat. They all took their turns grilling us for information on our private lives. We both took delight in giving them the wrong information about us. I thought they knew it too, because we were equally dying from laughter.
I decided to go dance with one of the guys, the one who had bought me a Slippery Nipple shot. I was dipping down and shaking it low while Waka Flocka’s song “No Hands” blared from the speakers. When I came back up, I saw Corey walk through the door with his arm around a pudgy light-skinned girl. From a distance, she looked like a dirty Mexican. She had pulled her hair back in
a high ponytail, and all she wore was a white tee and black jeans. I felt my heart drop, and although I knew I was drunk, I felt myself sober up real fast.
I immediately stopped dancing and stomped over to where Tammy was sitting. She was engaged in a conversation with an Asian guy who looked like he was in the military. He smiled at me, but I was too drunk and heated to acknowledge him back. I tapped Tammy’s shoulder, and when she looked up, I pointed at the front door. Together, we watched Corey and his lady friend walk over to a table. Right behind them were Bruce and his wife. Double date, huh? This nigga thought he was slick. This was what had been going on behind my back. I looked over at Tammy, and she looked at me.
“He’s got some nerve, Doll. Who the hell is she?”
“I bet you it’s whoever he’s been acting funny with me about.”
“Are you two over?” She looked at me closely.
“We are now,” I said to her.
“Does he know that?” She pointed her finger in their direction.
We both watched. I felt a level of boldness spread within me. This was the straw that had just broken the camel’s back. I knew that sensible Dollie had left the building. I was about to show my ass. He was fixing to learn today that fuckin’ with me and my emotions was a huge no-no.
“I don’t know, but I think we ought to make that clear,” I replied.
I turned to the table and quickly chugged down the Budweiser one of the guys had sent over to me. I needed the extra juice to calm my nerves. I removed my heels and immediately began to tramp across the dance floor, pulling my hair back in a ponytail as I went. Tammy followed right behind me. Even the guys who had been standing around us and had caught wind of our conversation were following close behind, with their nosy asses.
When I approached Corey’s table, I saw Bruce kick Corey under the table. Corey and his girlfriend had been looking at something on his cell phone. Bruce and his girl, Justine, stood up, like they was getting ready to do something. Justine eyed Tammy, but the firmness in Tammy’s stance showed me she wasn’t backing down to anybody. I was so damn glad she was with me and had my back 100 percent.