Healed by Her Army Doc

by Meredith Webber

  And if that was why he was getting out of the army then she, for all she loved him—because she loved him—wasn’t the one for him.

  But what could she say?

  I love you but I won’t marry you?

  Too hurtful.

  Make light of it?

  Could she?

  She ate another square of toast—sawdust.

  Looked at a point just beyond his left shoulder and—well, gabbled really.

  ‘Well, it seems as if you’ve got it all sorted. And if you come to Bayside it will be great to have you in the SDR! You can bring such a lot of different experience to it. I bet Blake was thrilled at the idea. And if you’re replacing Luc in the ED his—’

  Apartment was for sale at the moment.

  That’s what she’d been about to say when she’d realised that while working in the same hospital as Angus would be a permanent source of pain to her, having him living in the same apartment block would be sheer torture.

  Especially when he found the wife and children...

  But she, Kate, could get out of the SDR—her surgical work would be getting more extensive this year, less time in the ED. She could do this.

  She risked a glance at him, but his head was bent over the enormous breakfast he had ordered.

  His hair was a little longer, showing the curls that probably made him keep it short, and her fingers twitched with the urge to touch it, feel its softness, run her fingers through it. She watched his hands, cutting a sausage neatly and precisely, and remembered them sliding across her body, bringing it alive at the slightest touch.

  And her body ached for him, ached to hold him, feel his warmth, his heat, to kiss him and be lost in his kiss, to lose herself in him—in love...

  * * *

  Angus ate with grim determination. Somehow, somewhere along the line, his careful planning had gone disastrously wrong. He’d heard Kate’s words—had felt them like knife wounds, in fact—but they were...

  False?

  He ate another slice of sausage.

  No, they hadn’t rung false, yet some emotion had been there behind them.

  And as if he’d take the offered job at Bayside, knowing she was working in the same hospital, being so close to her yet not hers—she not his...

  He needed to get away, out of the café, go for a long walk, anything to clear his head, but he was damned if he’d leave his breakfast—damned if he’d let her see how upset he was by her casual brush-off.

  Because that’s what it was!

  Or was it?

  Something niggled at him.

  Something whispering that there was more...

  ‘I’ve got to go—on duty.’

  She was on her feet, beside him, and he caught her hand.

  ‘Kate?’ he said, and looked up in time to see her squeeze her eyes shut, but not before he’d seen the sheen of tears.

  ‘I’ll see you around,’ she said, oh, so casually, after which she retrieved her hand and walked away.

  CHAPTER TWELVE

  IT TOOK ANGUS five weeks to finalise his ‘return to civvy street’ plan, then suddenly he was there—in the ED, at SDR meetings and, worst of all, living in the same apartment block.

  So how could she not walk home from work with him if they happened to leave the hospital at the same time?

  For Kate, it was agony. All the memories she’d tried so hard to pack away had escaped, so her body hummed with inner excitement, her skin tightened at the slightest accidental touch, while his voice—though often she barely registered a word he said—filled her body with an aching longing she hadn’t known existed.

  Not that Angus felt any of these manifestations—not even awkwardness—prattling on as he would to any colleague about the new challenges he was finding in the job.

  It was only after she’d changed shifts three times that she began to suspect these meetings, the walks home together weren’t entirely accidental. Was he doing it to torture her?

  Prove something?

  She had no idea, but it was affecting her to the point that it was only by maintaining the strictest self-discipline that she could concentrate on work.

  But once home, inside, she was a mess, distracted, picky, even short with Alice at times, wanting nothing more than to shut herself away in a dark hole and wait for the storm of emotions to go away.

  Had Alice spoken to Harry that she came knocking on the apartment door on Kate’s day off, finding Kate still in her pyjamas at ten o’clock?

  ‘Not running today?’ Harry asked, raising her eyebrows at Kate’s attire, knowing that Kate ran every day she could—especially on days off.

  ‘No!’

  Simple answer, not exactly rude but fairly blunt.

  ‘Because of Angus?’ Harry, undeterred, continued.

  ‘What the hell’s it got to do with Angus?’ Kate growled, and Harry smiled at her.

  ‘You can’t honestly believe that the entire staff of the hospital hasn’t seen that something’s up between you and Angus. I’m working in Geriatrics before I get back to ICU and it’s even whispered about up there. Gorgeous new doc who’d tempted Kate Mitchell out of her shell, now working at the hospital and being ignored by said Kate while the sexual tension between the two of you could cause spontaneous combustion!’

  ‘That’s ridiculous,’ Kate snapped, while her stomach clenched and unclenched.

  ‘Is it?’ Harry said gently. ‘Kate, you gave me a prod when I was feeling too sorry for myself to be bothered with life. Now it’s my turn. Even the most self-focussed member of the staff—and you know we get plenty of those—can see the sparks that fly between you and Angus. And anyone being caught between the two of you can feel the force field of whatever it is you share.’

  She paused, obviously waiting for some input from Kate, but she was too flabbergasted by Harry’s words to say anything at all.

  ‘All I’m saying,’ Harry carried on, ‘is to at least explore the situation. Talk to the man, throw yourself into his arms, do something, anything, even if it’s a risk, but don’t let something as powerful as whatever’s between you go to waste without at least giving it a go.’

  Throw yourself into his arms?

  Oh, how she longed to do that! One last time because surely it would lead to them making love. And in the languorous bliss after that she could explain—even tell him she loved him and then explain—and maybe after that she’d go back to Brisbane. He’d find someone else—

  That thought was like a knife wound in her chest.

  ‘Well?’ Harry said, and Kate found a smile for her. Not a very good one, she was sure, but Harry had spoken out of kindness and friendship.

  ‘Thank you,’ Kate said, and she leaned forward and gave Harry a hug, walked her to the door and let her out.

  But thinking Throw yourself into his arms was far easier than working out how to do it.

  Except that Alice had gone back up to the island for an old staff reunion and she was alone in the flat.

  Entice him in?

  No, she had to be proactive.

  Would he be at home?

  His—Luc’s—apartment was at the front of the building with the ocean view, so she couldn’t see if lights were on or not.

  So she’d visit!

  But in her daggy pyjamas?

  She smiled to herself, remembering the day he’d left her at the art gallery, suddenly called away. She’d gone to the Queen Victoria Building and as well as some fancy underwear she had bought a gorgeous nightdress, soft cream silk with a low V-neckline trimmed with lace and tiny rosebuds.

  She’d meet someone in the corridor for sure if she paraded down to Angus’s apartment in that, but if she wore her terry towelling dressing gown over it she could be popping down to borrow a cup of sugar from a neighbour.

  More or less
!

  Her excitement was growing. She might be planning to say goodbye to Angus, but let it be a glorious goodbye.

  She showered, used moisturiser and perfume, not too much, pulled on the slinky gown and shook her head.

  What on earth was she thinking?

  What if someone was there?

  What if someone from the hospital was there?

  She was about to take it off when the knowledge that this might be her last chance to lie in Angus’s arms hit her with the force of a tidal wave.

  Damn it all, she’d do it.

  But she’d ring him first.

  She dialled his number—fingers shaking on the keys—heard his deep ‘Angus Caruth’ and her courage faltered.

  ‘Kate, is that you?’

  Of course, her name had come up on his screen.

  She drew a deep breath and then, oh, so casually, said, ‘I just wondered if you were home. I could pop in. That’s if you haven’t any visitors.’

  Long silence.

  ‘No, no visitors,’ he said, which wasn’t exactly welcoming but she was too uptight to dither any more.

  ‘I’ll see you soon.’

  She went swiftly down the corridor—it would have been too easy to turn back if she’d dawdled—and knocked on his door.

  * * *

  Given that Kate had barely spoken to him since he’d arrived at Bayside, Angus was already puzzled by the phone call, but opening the door to Kate, clutching a towelling dressing gown around her slim figure, he was completely thrown.

  ‘Are you going to ask me in? Just for now?’

  There was a quiver in Kate’s voice that pierced the armour he’d begun to build around his heart, and he put his hands on her shoulders and pulled her gently towards him, shutting the door behind her.

  And for a moment, it was enough just to have her in his arms again.

  He had no idea what had gone wrong between them, let alone why his change of career had obviously upset her, but for now she was here.

  So he kissed her, gently at first, then, as a tiny moan escaped her lips, his kiss drew harder, hotter, more demanding.

  The thick towelling robe had fallen open and underneath was fabric as smooth and soft as her silky skin.

  ‘I should say wow but I doubt it will be on you long enough for me to truly appreciate it,’ he said thickly, and heard her chuckle, felt it in her throat as he pressed kisses to the slim column of her neck and downwards, teasing at the deep V of the gown to find her breast, her nipple.

  She wove her fingers in his hair and gave a gasp as he licked and nipped the thickened nub, then she was in his arms, the slinky material torturing him as he carried her to his bed, set her down on it and took in her beauty.

  ‘Love me,’ she whispered, and he needed no second bidding, stripping off his clothes to join her on the bed.

  He kissed her. Teasing kisses at first, while his hand slid the soft fabric up her leg, his kisses more insistent as his fingers found her warmth. Then brushing tiny roses aside, he teased her nipple again, her fingers holding his head to her, wanting more yet squirming at his touch.

  And when his lips claimed hers again, she took him in her hand and guided him into her, moving slowly at first as they adjusted to each other, before it became a race, a battle to be one, their bodies demanding more and more until finally they lay, depleted, joined and close, slick sweat warm on both their bodies...

  Together.

  And with her arms tight around him, his head resting on her breast, she began to talk, so softly and slowly he knew every word held tears.

  ‘I love you, Angus. Love you more than I could ever imagine I could love anyone. But leaving the army, coming to Bayside. You should have said, we should have talked. I would have told you it was only ever going to be for the “now”. Not this now but the “now” we had back then. That’s what we’d agreed, and even when I knew I loved you, I felt at least I’d have that memory for ever.’

  Angus heard the words, even understood them for they were simple English, but the meaning was eluding him, so he kept silent, waited, aware now that this was why Kate had come.

  Oh, going to bed with him had obviously been a big part of it, but he saw now it had been her way to break down the walls that had risen between them.

  Break them down so she could talk.

  ‘You told me once you wouldn’t marry because being married to an army officer in the job you did was no life for a wife and family. Some people obviously do it and do it well, but you felt with the tent and calls to dangerous or just disease-ridden places it was unfair to have someone waiting and worrying at home.’

  She paused, held him closer, ran her fingers lightly over the planes of his face, kissed the top of his head.

  ‘Then suddenly you’re out of the army, working here, talking about a wife and children.’

  Her voice cracked and he guessed they’d reached the heart of the conversation.

  ‘What I hadn’t said, hadn’t told you,’ she whispered, snuggling closer to him now, ‘was that after the baby was stillborn, the specialist was doubtful I’d carry a live child to term. He had some garbled explanation but I wasn’t listening because I didn’t ever want to go through what had happened again, determined I wouldn’t—couldn’t. Not all that waiting and the caring and excitement and then nothing but a huge hole in my heart and aching, empty arms...’

  He eased away, seeing clearly now. This woman he loved and who definitely loved him backing off because he’d been foolish enough to talk about a wife and children—a family—the children part being the barrier that had grown between them.

  He propped himself on his elbow and looked down at her, traced her lips with his thumb.

  ‘Did you honestly believe I’d turn my back on you—find someone else to marry—because you might not be able to give me children? Did you think I was so shallow that some vague idea of family would make me reject you?’

  He heard his voice, knew it was harsh, but would have continued had he not seen the tears on her cheeks. And with aching heart he gathered her into his arms and held her tight, rocking her as he would a crying child, the love he felt for her enveloping them both.

  ‘My darling Kate. It’s you I love, just you. Yes, should we happen to have a child I’d love it too, but, no matter what, I love you. And anyway I don’t believe the pundits who told you such rotten news, probably when you were very vulnerable. I’ve read up on stillbirths, mainly to gain an idea of even a fraction of the pain you must have gone through, and for pregnancies where there might be problems, there are now foetal monitors the mother can wear in the last trimester, and with any hint of the foetal heartbeat faltering, it’s straight into hospital.’

  He kissed her then, gentle kisses, before adding, ‘Not that children are important—not as long as I have you.’

  And Kate relaxed in his arms—right where she belonged.

  CHAPTER THIRTEEN

  THEY MARRIED QUIETLY, asking a celebrant to perform the ceremony on the balcony of Angus’s unit, Alice beside Kate and Angus’s uncle supporting him.

  ‘Your mother will be furious,’ Alice told Kate, as she slipped on the long, linen shift she’d chosen for her wedding, flowers scattered on a cream background, including cornflowers that she loved and often took to wee Joshua’s grave.

  ‘I’ll make peace with Mum,’ Kate promised her aunt. ‘We’re already talking and when Angus has been at Bayside long enough to take some time off, we’ll fly north to see them. He’s already won some brownie points by being Scottish!’

  Alice laughed and kissed Kate’s cheek.

  ‘Just be happy, both of you. I know it’s trite and clichéd but make the most of every day and never be afraid to show your love.’

  Too overcome for words, Kate kissed this woman who’d taken her in and probably saved her sanity.
<
br />   Then they walked together out onto the balcony, looking out over the deep blue of the ocean and the white foam on the breakers closer to the shore.

  Angus’s smile and the pride in his eyes told Kate all she needed to know. She stood beside him, took his hand and said the words that would bind them together for ever.

  ‘So, how do you like being Mrs Dr Caruth?’ he asked as he bent his head and kissed her lips, gently yet firmly, promising so much more than words could ever convey.

  Promising her love...

  * * * * *

  Look out for the next story in the Bondi Bay Heroes quartet

  Rescued by Her Mr. Right

  by Alison Roberts

  And if you missed where it all started, check out

  The Shy Nurse’s Rebel Doc

  by Alison Roberts

  Finding His Wife, Finding a Son

  by Marion Lennox

  All available now!

  Keep reading for an excerpt from Rescued by Her Mr. Right by Alison Roberts.

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