Bear to Love: Kodiak Den #3 (Alaskan Den Men Book 8)

by Amy Lamont

  I buffed my nails against the front of the black T-shirt I wore. “It’s truly a gift.”

  He laughed and released me, only to ruffle my hair.

  “Did you need me, Macy?” Kaden asked, his brows pulled together in concern.

  I resisted the urge to sigh. This is why it was hard to get annoyed when my brothers got so protective. As irritating as their overbearing behavior could be at times, it was always clear it came out of a real love and concern for me.

  “Actually, I need Nash.” I turned my attention to the man standing quietly in front of Alyssa’s desk, his expression blank. I searched his features for a few beats, hoping to catch a glimpse of the warmth and affection he always showed me.

  When not even a glimmer of that appeared, I went on. “I could use your help. I got a call about a cat on the loose that looks injured and pregnant. The woman who called me said she’d had trouble catching her. I’m worried about leaving her alone in the woods too long, and since you’re such an amazing tracker...”

  I let the sentence dangle there.

  If I hoped the old Nash would return with a vengeance, jumping in to offer his help immediately, I’d have been disappointed.

  “You want me to come help you save a cat?” His tone made it sound like I just asked him to come help me purchase feminine products.

  As he spoke, Gage, already standing close to Nash, shifted his weight so he got even closer.

  I pulled a slow breath in through my nose. Just that slight movement let me know I needed to handle things with care here. “I know you’re a big, tough Army man who probably spends his days saving the world now. But I could really use your help.”

  I pulled out the big guns, tossing my dark hair over my shoulder, looking up at him from beneath my lashes and allowing my lower lip to pop out just the tiniest bit. It was the look that allowed me to wrap my brothers and their friends around my little finger since the time we were kids. And it always, always worked.

  Until now.

  “I don’t know, Macy.” With a flick of his wrist, Nash gave the files in his hand a little flip up. “I’m bogged down right now.

  I turned a pleading look Alyssa’s way, forgoing the big-eyed, pouty look. I did my best to convey the urgency of my mission without Kaden catching on. “Alyssa, can you please spare Nash for like a half an hour? I promise, if we have no luck, I’ll send him right back.”

  I could see her fighting a grin. The one good thing about the sweet and innocent reputation I had with my family? They never seemed to question my intentions. Alyssa, on the other hand, knew better.

  Alyssa won the fight with her smile. She schooled her features into some semblance of normal. “We can spare Nash for the morning. Take as long as you need.” She turned her gaze to Nash and nodded at the folders in his hand. “Nothing so urgent you can’t wait until this afternoon to get started on it.”

  I kept my eyes trained on Nash’s face. He shot a quick glance at Gage, a fleeting expression of panic flashing over his face, there and gone so quickly, I would have missed it if I blinked.

  Gage moved so that his shoulder brushed Nash’s. “I’ll help, too.”

  Shit, shit, shit. That wouldn’t work. The name of this plan was Operation Divide and Conquer. Having Gage tag along would defeat the purpose.

  I dragged in a long breath to calm myself and did my best to give Gage a wave of my hand that I prayed looked nonchalant. “Don’t worry about it, Gage. I think we’ll do better if just the two of us go. Nash can help me track her, but I’m afraid too many people would just scare her away again.”

  Gage’s already chiseled jawline hardened further and something so bleak passed through his eyes that my heart wanted to jump out of my chest and land in a heap at his feet. It took all my self-control not to take back my words and tell him of course he could come along.

  I swallowed hard and pasted on a smile that felt more like a grimace. I turned to Nash. “Ready?”

  He pressed his lips together in a flat line and squared his shoulders like a prisoner about to face a firing squad. He nodded, dropped the files on the desk and headed for the door.

  I followed him out, glancing over my shoulder to take in the mixture of expressions of the rest of the occupants of the room—worried, hopeful, and on Gage, a blankness so devoid of emotion it made me shiver.

  I gave them a half-hearted wave and scurried to catch up to Nash.

  Nash slid into the front seat of his shiny, black SUV without pausing to ask my preference on the vehicle we took. I wanted to grab the cat carrier from my truck, but I was too afraid of giving Nash time to formulate an excuse not to come.

  I didn’t wait for an invitation. I swung into Nash’s vehicle, slamming the door and pulling my seatbelt across my chest in one quick motion.

  “We’re going out to Mrs. Hedley’s place,” I informed him.

  His only response was another nod as he put the car in gear and pointed us toward the edge of town.

  I stared out the windshield for a good two minutes as I searched my mind for ideas on how to pull Nash out of his shell. Now that I had him to myself, I didn’t want to waste the opportunity.

  Finally I thought of something that might get us headed on the right path. I turned to him. “So, Kaden said you and Gage are renting the house at the end of the Hunters’ property.”

  As soon as I said Gage’s name, Nash’s shoulders flexed and a muscle ticked in his jaw. He didn’t even bother with a nod.

  “I didn’t realize you guys were in the market to be roommates.” And that was the truth. Single, male werebears didn’t tend to pair up. At Nash’s age, they started to get pretty grouchy if they hadn’t found a mate yet. Putting two shifters in a house together could get a little dangerous. “How’s that working out for you guys?”

  Nash shrugged, and if possible, his shoulders tensed more.

  I did my best to plow ahead. “That good, huh? Aren’t you worried about what’ll happen when one of you finds a mate?”

  Notoriously possessive, most werebears would rather cut off a limb than have an unattached male living with him and a new mate.

  “Not worried about it.” Nash’s voice sounded like it traveled across a cheese grater to make its way out of his throat.

  I sank my teeth into my lower lip and wrapped my arms around my middle. What was I doing? What made me think I could offer any help to these two men? Surely they needed some professional help, not some meddling kid sister.

  But even as the doubt flooded my mind, I knew Nash and Gage wouldn’t allow professional help. And I knew without being told that Kaden and Mason, and I’m sure other members of the Kodiak Den, had already tried to break through to these two. Nothing had worked up until now, so I had to try something.

  “Mrs. Hedley said she last saw the cat over there.” I pointed to the woods on the west side of Mrs. Hedley’s house.

  Nash wordlessly followed my directions, pulling the SUV to the side and parking near the spot I’d pointed out. We hopped out and I walked around the side of the vehicle, moving to his side.

  “She said she ran off here. Any ideas on how to get a fix on her?”

  His shoulders flexed and he moved toward the tree line, his fists clenched at his sides. I could almost see his agitation building.

  He pulled in a deep breath and strode to a spot a little farther away. “She went in here.”

  I peered into the dense greenery. The forest here was thick and full with plenty of places for a small animal to hide. I sighed. “This is going to be like finding a needle in a haystack.”

  Nash didn’t respond. He took a few steps into the trees and then shifted to the right, following the scent he’d caught a little farther into the woods. I followed and realized this hadn’t been a bad idea at all. This really would have been an impossible task for me, but Nash was known for his ability to scent out any creature.

  With a glance at him, I couldn’t help but wonder if that ability had been put to use while he was deployed.
Had he been called on to use his abilities to hunt down men? Was that part of what had happened to him when he was overseas?

  A sharp crack of a tree branch falling came from our left. I jumped, startled, but turned to continue following Nash.

  Only Nash was no longer moving. He’d frozen solid in his spot. He stood stock-still, his eyes wide and frightened, the breath coming from him in harsh pants that made his chest rise and fall rapidly.

  I eased up beside him. “Nash?”

  His wild gaze slid to me, and I had to hold back a gasp. His face was a mask of horror that I couldn’t even put words to. His eyes seemed to be looking at something I couldn’t see, something far away from the Alaskan forest where we stood.

  “It’s okay, sweetheart. We’re okay.” I used the voice I often used to coax an injured animal into trusting me. “The sound was just a falling branch. And we’re safe right here.”

  As I spoke, I could see reality leaching back in. It took a few more seconds for his eyes to lose the faraway look and for him to focus on me. Even as he did, I could see tremors shake through him.

  I moved forward slowly, not wanting to startle him with any sudden movements. “We’re okay. What do you need, Nash?”

  His lips parted, but before he could speak, I reached him and gently placed my hand on his back, intending to offer comfort.

  But the instant my hand made contact, something changed. Nash seemed to slide right back into consciousness, his gaze going from a little fuzzy to laser focused in half a heartbeat.

  Deep inside me something changed, too. My bear came awake with a roar. A fierce desire ripped through me with such force, it was a struggle to keep from shifting.

  I swayed on my feet, lips parted, staring up into his dark, molten eyes. The same word that floated through my mind at my aunt’s gathering came back to me, this time with a vengeance.

  Mine, mine, mine, mine.

  “Macy.” His voice came on a deep growl.

  My name on Nash’s lips and the sound of his voice, his bear so close to the surface, made me shiver. I slid my hand around to rest on his chest and my other one joined it. Nash’s arms came up and around me, crushing my body to his.

  “Nash. I—”

  I wasn’t sure how I planned to finish that sentence, and I’d never get the chance to. In that moment, a crashing interrupted me, the sound getting closer and closer.

  I gasped as the cat we’d been searching for came charging out from underneath a bush, moving straight toward us. I broke free of Nash, bent, and before the cat could escape back into the woods, I scooped her into my arms.

  Nash rocked back on his heels, drawing my gaze even as I whispered to the animal in my arms. “It’s okay, sweetheart. I’ve got you.”

  At my words, something shifted again behind Nash’s eyes, the coldness seeping back in.

  No, no, no. I didn’t know what happened when I touched him, but I’d felt him coming back to me. Felt him calming from his panic and beginning to come to life again.

  The cat wiggled in my grasp and I turned my attention back to her. “You’re okay. I’ve got you.” I kept one arm underneath her to support her and used my other hand to stroke softly from her ears down her back, whispering nonsense to her the whole time.

  In minutes, the cat laid docilely in my arms, eyes at half-mast as she purred under my hand. As soon as I knew she wasn’t going to leap away from me, I flicked my gaze back up to Nash.

  He stood a few feet away, his hands on his hips. His eyes were a little wild and his breath came in shallow huffs.

  Damn. I lost him again.

  “Nash!” A male voice came at us from the area we’d parked the car.

  Nash’s eyes closed briefly and he dropped his hands to his sides. Hard to miss the relief he wore so clearly. Even harder not to be a little offended by it.

  “Gage, we’re here,” Nash called back.

  Gage burst through the trees, and if Nash had seemed close to panic before, Gage looked completely feral. His jaw was clenched so hard that his teeth were bared. His chest heaved with the exertion of pulling air into his lungs. His eyes all but rolled in his head, wild with some emotion I couldn’t quite figure out.

  Nash moved to him and placed a hand on the other man’s shoulder. “Shift.”

  Gage stared at him, unblinking, for several long beats.

  “Shift. Come run with me.” Nash dug in the pocket of his dark olive cargo pants. He fished out his keys and tossed them at me without ever looking away from Gage.

  I juggled the cat in my arms and just barely managed to catch them. “What—”

  “Take the car back, Macy. Gage and I are going to run.” He tugged Gage deeper into the forest with one hand while the other went to the hem of his T-shirt. Before he bared any skin, the two men disappeared into the trees, leaving me standing alone except for the stray cat. And feeling more than a little shell-shocked and itchy under my skin.

  My bear paced back and forth deep inside me, completely unhappy at being denied what she most wanted, roaring for the freedom to run alongside the two men. Not that we’d been invited.

  “What just happened here?” I asked the cat.

  I swore that cat shrugged right before she nudged my hand so I could continue petting her.

  Chapter 3

  Macy

  Over the next few days I developed a severe case of RBS—restless bear syndrome. For years my bear had been practically dormant to the point I started to wonder if my mother had forgotten to mention the torrid affair she’d had with Mr. Tyson, our very human mailman, nine months before my world debut. The last two days had put those fears to rest completely.

  I’d spent two nights tossing and turning while debating the wisdom of following through on my plans for Operation Divide and Conquer. The relationship between Nash and Gage was way more complex than I realized, and I was afraid my meddling had the potential to do more harm than good.

  Every time I decided to back away and let Kaden and Mason take the lead in helping Nash and Gage, my bear roared to life, clawing at my insides until I felt like one big, raw exposed nerve.

  My days were no better. Trying to get through caring for the animals at the Kodiak Rescue and Rehabilitation Center, sneaking off for band practice, and fending off increasingly annoyed calls and texts from Kaden while running on fumes did not make my days run smoothly. To put it mildly.

  The mistakes I’d made had been many and varied and included everything from locking my keys in my truck to burning my toast beyond recognition. And don’t even get me started on forgetting to latch the cage on an injured young raccoon I’d been caring for. He’d given me a run for my money for the better part of the morning.

  I put my truck into gear and pulled out of the rescue’s parking lot. My mind wandered back to my latest obsession—Nash and Gage, Gage and Nash. The two were tangled in my head like those interlocking metal puzzles that you had to move just the right way to get them to separate.

  And then there was The Moment, as I’d come to think of it. That fleeting instant when I’d put my hand on Nash and everything I ever thought I felt for him changed in a flash.

  I tried telling myself I’d imagined it. Unfortunately, I had my wide-awake, restless she-bear reminding me otherwise. Constantly.

  Was it really possible Nash was my mate?

  Every time the question popped up in my mind, my bear roared a resounding yes.

  But even if that were true, the last thing Nash needed right now was to worry about claiming his mate. Not to mention he was obviously dealing with some kind of posttraumatic stress disorder. He might not even be able to recognize his mate at this point. Maybe it would be for the best if I backed off until the issues with Gage and Nash were resolved.

  My bear growled and I rolled my eyes as I could almost feel the sound vibrating through me. I sighed deeply as I turned my truck onto a gravel road leading up to an old hunting lodge. A tourist who’d been out photographing wildlife stopped in the rescue center
to tell me he’d spotted what looked to be a stray dog out that way.

  At least searching for a dog up there would help keep my mind off my troubles for a little bit. No more Nash and Gage. And no more letting my concentration wander to the point it caused a mishap.

  No sooner had the thought crossed my mind then my truck slid too close to the drainage ditch along the side of the road, making the backend fishtail. I jerked the wheel to correct it and found myself skidding toward the other side of the road.

  I fought back panic and steered into the skid, pumping my breaks. My breath left me in a rush as the truck steadied and I was able to get control once more.

  The relief was short-lived. I’d made it only a few more yards up the road when the truck seized. The engine sputtered and the old pickup jerked. A wheezing sound came from the front end, followed by a cough that sounded like a victim of the plague in the final throws of death, and then the engine died and the truck came to a grinding halt in the middle of the gravel road.

  I slapped my hand against the steering wheel. “Damn, damn, damn.”

  I threw the truck into park, as if that mattered at this point. Resting my head back against the seat, my eyes drifted closed. What else could go wrong today?

  Reaching for my phone with a sigh, I hesitated with my thumb over the list of contacts. Which one of my brothers should I call for help?

  I wrinkled my nose at the thought. I could always just call the local garage. Jake would be happy to come give me a tow. The only problem with that was Jake was a member of the Kodiak Den. Not to mention my brother Trent’s best friend. So it wasn’t like calling him meant my damsel in distress moment wouldn’t get back to my entire family within the hour.

  As I looked over my contacts one more time, a name popped out at me.

  Gage. I couldn’t fight the grin that took over my face. Maybe the universe was going to help me with my plans after all. Gage was known all over Kodiak and beyond for being able to fix anything with an engine.